


Cataclysmic Rebirth

by wolfdancer333



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Attempted Sexual Assault, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Hot Mess Marinette Dupain-Cheng, I Don't Even Know, Identity Issues, Identity Reveal, Loss of Identity, Minor Violence, Protective Adrien Agreste, Protective Chat Noir, Self-Reflection, Spoilers, Teen Angst, Teenage Drama, Teenagers, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-05-05 01:29:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 101,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14606208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfdancer333/pseuds/wolfdancer333
Summary: New friendships are made, Marinette struggles with her dual identity, her relationship with Adrien shatters before it begins, Tikki's feelings get hurt, and a bunch of angsty teen feelings come into the mix. What could possibly go wrong? Everything.A terrible event changes everything in Marinette's life, shattering her. Can she rebuild herself and save herself, inside and outside the mask? Or will she succumb to the cataclysm inside herself?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> MINOR VIOLENCE POSSIBLY MAJOR VIOLENCE BORDERLINE WARNING!!!!! 
> 
> For a later chapter, there is/are mention(s) of a violent event that takes place. I will label the scene before and afterward in case you do not want to read it directly but it will be referenced a few times afterwards. This is a bit darker than most of my writing but, as always, there is fluff and a happy ending (as happy as there can be). As another side warning: there is an original character that is focused on BUT NOT THE MAIN FOCUS in this story. He is pretty necessary to the plot and I hope everyone likes him as much as I liked creating him. 
> 
> This is an Adrien/Marinette fic so that is the ship. The OC is not the main ship. Otherwise, enjoy!! :)

“I don’t know about this, girl.” Alya’s scepticism was loud even through the speaker of Marinette’s phone.

Marinette flipped the page of the magazine she was reading – a teen magazine – and blinked at Alya’s video screen, tilting her head to the side. Her messy bun left tendrils of hair lying loosely down her back as she bit her lip before replying to Alya’s narrowed golden-hazel gaze. “It’s so hard to tell him how I feel. It says,” Marinette flipped back a couple of pages, eyes skimming for the paragraph she had found earlier. She placed her index finger on it and read out, “’Found someone you like? They don’t seem interested? Jealousy is the key! Make them jealous, make them see how desirable you are, and they won’t be able to resist!’”

Alya snorted and rolled her eyes as she adjusted the angle of her phone, showing Marinette she was lying against the headboard of her bed, hair in loose waves down her back. She gave Marinette a pointed stare and a raised eyebrow. “Sounds like a TV ad. Mari, girl, are you sure about this?” Alya’s face melted immediately into concern as she brushed a stray strand of reddish-brown hair behind her ear. “I mean, jealousy is a thing, trust me, my boy gets jealous easy.” She sent Marinette a wink and Marinette giggled, kicking her feet up behind her from her position on her stomach. “But, like, are you sure?”

Marinette sighed and let her head fall to her cool black and pink bedsheets, mumbling out, “I don’t know.” She lifted her head to lay her chin on her crossed arms as she gazed at the open magazine. “But it’s better than never doing anything right? And I mean, if Adrien doesn’t like me….” Marinette winced, feeling her heart pound painfully in her chest. “Then maybe, this would help me move on.”

Alya was quiet before Marinette looked up at her phone, propped against her gray and black cat body pillow, to see her best friend looking at her with sharp eyes. “There’s nothing for him _not_ to like, Mari. And you can’t even string two sentences together in front of him so you don’t know how he feels about you. Why don’t you just ask him?”

Marinette looked down at her bed, blinking at the warm tears in the back of her eyes. “You know I can’t. For some reason, I just can’t.”

“Listen, whatever you want to do, girl I got your back. But just….Think on it, okay?” Alya’s concern shone in her eyes and Marinette smiled gratefully, the pain in her heart lessening. “It’s getting pretty late, I should get off here and get some sleep. I love you, Mari.” 

Alya blew her a kiss and Marinette tilted her cheek, giving it a gentle pat in recognition of the friendly gesture. The two girls giggled before Alya waved and, with a boop, Marinette’s phone screen showed the ended call. She turned her head back to gaze at the magazine but her eyesight became blocked by the floating red form of her kwami. Tikki was looking just as dubious as Alya and Marinette groaned, hiding her head against her folded arms. 

“Not you too, Tikki.”

Tikki’s deep sigh was not missed before Marinette felt the kwami settle atop her back. “Marinette, I don’t think jealousy is the right way to go. You could end up being hurt or hurting your date’s feelings.”

Marinette lifted her head again, tilting her head to the right. Her bluebell eyes softened as they fell on her bulletin board, pinned with various photos of Adrien Agreste. Her heart flipped inside her chest and she felt a smile crawl across her lips. 

“Why can’t I just _talk_ to him Tikki? What is wrong with me?” Her voice was muffled but the tears in her voice were clear.

Tikki fluttered from her back to her cheek, where the little kwami sat atop her shoulder and gave her cheek a gentle pet or two. Her round, blue eyes were sympathetic as the God gazed down at her and Marinette bit her lip hard to distract from the memories of her attempt to speak to the boy she had fallen deeply, head-over-heels in love with. 

“Oh, Marinette. You’re just nervous. You’re scared. And that’s okay!” Tikki twitched one of her antennas toward Adrien’s pictures on the bulletin board, then her other antenna at Marinette herself. “If you’re meant to be, then you will.”

Marinette’s bluebell gaze flitted to Tikki and she blinked at the strong, wise eyes that gazed back, not used to remembering that this tiny little red creature was over 8000 years old. Marinette gave a gentle, sheepish smile. “Sorry. You must be tired of dealing with my stupid teenage problems.”

Tikki instantly shook her head and leaned her head down to Marinette’s, cuddling her head into her cheek, and Marinette giggled, butting her cheek back. The little kwami was smiling affectionately when she floated down to sit atop Marinette’s bed, her eyes soft and bright and full. “Of course not. Your emotions are real and valid. You’re different Marinette, and different is good. Different can….” Tikki grinned and threw her little arms wide. “Can change the world! If you can change the world, and you can!” Tikki grinned up at her and shrugged casually. “Then I know you can talk to Adrien. One day.”

Marinette felt tears bud in her eyes and leaned over to place a gentle kiss atop Tikki’s head, causing the little kwami to giggle quickly, her antenna twitching. “Thank you, Tikki. I know it’s true but….” She glanced at the open magazine and then back to Tikki who was watching her curiously. “Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to go on a date. Even if…..Even if Adrien doesn’t get jealous, I could really like my date! And maybe,” Marinette bit her lip again and Tikki’s eyes softened in recognition.

The little God nuzzled her Chosen’s nose as she finished for her, “Maybe you will forget him and move on.”

Marinette nodded, kicking her legs back and forth slowly as she rolled to her back. “Mhmm. Because maybe I will be able to talk to him without messing up, one day. But….What if I don’t?”

Tikki shook her head and crossed her arms, floating upwards. “You will! Because you’re Marinette! And Marinettes can do anything.”

Marinette smiled from ear to ear, broad and open, and held out her hands. Tikki floated down into them where Marinette cupped her small friend to her chest. The two laid in silence, listening to each other’s breathing and the quiet of Marinette’s room. Bluebell eyes glanced at the magazine one last time before she felt the tension of the day finally release from her shoulders. She thought back, her smile fading and a finger gently petting Tikki, of the day she had had.

Ladybug was the superhero of luck but Marinette’s luck today had been, well, cataclysmic. She inwardly smacked herself at the pun despite how true it was. First, she had woken up to her alarm and not realizing how close she had been to falling off the bed had, promptly, fallen out of her bed from in her loft and to the floor. It was a long drop and she was lucky she hadn’t landed on her desk or her roller chair. She had rolled to her feet and started her day, not realizing she had set her alarm an hour late.

So she rushed her morning routine, missed breakfast, and was an hour late to Mme Bustier’s class. She winced when she remembered the disapproving look she had received and to make matters worse, Chloe had eaten the wrong cheerioes that morning that made her extra snappy. She had ridiculed Marinette for a good while when she went to turn in her literature report and ended up sprawling down to the ground. She had gotten up quickly, before anyone could even offer to help her up – Adrien, she had noticed with dismay, had been one of them.

Then, as the day drug on, she got bubblegum stuck to the bottom of her favourite pair of flats, had broken Alya’s favourite Ladybug charm she always wore on the edge of her phone case, and she had forgotten Tikki and her purse in the restroom. She had screamed and rushed to the bathroom so quickly she had left Alya standing at the doors of the school with Nino and Adrien. When she had come back and seen all three of her friends’ confused, wide-eyed, blinking stares she had immediately blushes and claimed, without thinking, “Period.”

Which caused Adrien and Nino to blush and stammer excuses to get away and a raised eyebrow from Alya. She had headed home for lunch hour, played Mech Strike III with her Dad and lost for the first time since she was 6, and had messed up a huge batch order from the Bakery that her parents had to redo so she could get back to school on time. The rest of the day had gone by similarly. More snotty Chloe, more tripping, more questions from Alya, another forget of Tikki and her purse in the classroom, and the worst part of it?

At the end of the day, Adrien had offered to walk her home with Nino and Alya muttering excuses in the background: “I’ve got, uh something!!” Followed by Nino’s, “And I’ve got, whatever she’s got! So, bye bro!”

So what did she do? She stammered and sputtered and blah blegh urg before finally screaming at him that he was too gorgeous to walk her home. AND SHE HAD RUN OFF! She had left Adrien Agreste standing outside their school, refusing his offer to walk her home – SHE WAS AN IDIOT –, and had basically screamed in his face he was gorgeous. What sucked the most was her phone call with Alya asking for deets. She had, embarrassingly, and with her face shoved into a pillow, retailed the whole disaster to Alya’s sputtering, uncontrollable laughs. 

Then, she had found the magazine. It was a simple teen magazine with what every teen wanted to know: beauty, fashion trends, romance. And how to get a guy you like to notice you. So when she had seen the article, claiming jealousy always worked, she had immediately called Alya. So, here she was, now lying on her back in her bed, petting Tikki and deciding if her life was over or if she could salvage what was left of it. And if a date with another guy was worth it.

She opened the eyes she hadn’t meant to close and looked to the left at her Adrien Board. Her heart gave a pained beat. She wasn’t just crushing on Adrien Agreste. Marinette was almost positive she was _in love_ with Adrien Agreste. Marinette Dupin-Cheng who couldn’t look him in the eye, speak to him for more than 2 seconds unless she became overwhelmed with her feelings for him and couldn’t talk, or she became a flustered mess ending up on her face in front of him. 

She blinked back tears and sniffled, the sound drawing up the dazed, sleepy blue eyes of her kwami. “Marinette, you okay?”

When Tikki saw Marinette lift one of her hands to hastily scrub at her misty eyes, the little God hurtled forward and crushed herself to Marinette’s cheek. The teen girl rolled to her side, curling up with Tikki making calming, shh noises and cuddling her cheek. She rose up her hands to cup the red God of Creation to her face and take comfort in Tikki’s powerful presence, her heart being lulled into a numbing pain. 

“Why can’t I tell him how I feel?” She mumbled, voice breaking at the last word. 

Tikki rubbed her little hands against Marinette’s cheeks, giving a gentle kiss to her nose. Her eyes were sympathetic and sad as she whispered back, “It’s okay Marinette, it’s okay. You will. I promise. I believe in you. Believe in yourself and I promise, you will tell him.”

Marinette closed her eyes shut tight against the memories assaulting her tired, worn out mind. All she could see were his green eyes and his soft smile and how many times she wanted to tell him she thought he was gorgeous and smart and kind. 

“I’m tired. Can we…..” She coughed to clear her voice when it broke into a sob. “Can we get into bed?”

Tikki didn’t hesitate. The little red God swirled to the magazine, throwing it onto Marinette’s computer desk, and pulled back the covers of Marinette’s bed. Marinette felt Tikki’s watchful gaze on her as she crawled to the black and pink pillow with the black bowtie and curled up to it, pressing it against her face and welcoming the darkness when Tikki turned off the light. She felt Tikki settle next to the top of her head where her kwami ran little hands through her hair, de-tangling her bun and letting her hair hang free.

“Marinette.” Marinette clutched her pillow tighter, feeling the dredges of sleep pulling at her. “Do you trust me?”

She nodded. She didn’t need to think about that. She trusted Tikki with everything in her, inside and outside the mask. 

Tikki’s gentle voice drifted to her. “I know who Cat Noir is and trust me. It will be okay. Just be yourself.”

As Marinette drifted to sleep, she was haunted by dreams of Adrien’s green eyes swirling and mixing, blending, into familiar glowing irises she couldn’t quite remember. She dreamed of her, Marinette, standing next to Ladybug, her alter ego. And the question that burned in her mind, that she wished she had asked Tikki, haunted her more than any dream she had ever had: how could she be herself….When she didn’t even know who that was?

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sunlight filtered in behind her closed eyes, dancing around in her mind, and she sleepily cracked one eye open at the hatch leading to her balcony. Sunlight was falling through and she could hear the happy chirping and song of birds. A busy chatter filled the air of the morning through Paris’ streets and Marinette slowly opened her other eye, yawning so wide, she brought tears to her eyes. She blinked sleepily, slowly, feeling life beginning to stir within her limbs again. 

One of her arms was thrown above her head and the other was twisted at an odd angle, palm facing the ceiling. Nestled there was the red, sleeping form of Tikki who was – Marinette inwardly squealed – cuddling Marinette’s thumb with a bright grin even in her sleep. The little kwami’s mouth was parted happily, antenna twitching in her sleep. Marinette closed her fingers a bit more securely around Tikki’s small form to offer her warmth and comfort while her body registered wakefulness. 

She curled her toes and smiled at the tickly feeling of being awake that spread through her, like sunlight chasing shadows through her body. Both her legs were entangled in her sheets, her pink and black duvet hanging off her bed by a corner. She winced at the tossing and turning she must have done to get it that way but when she thought back, she couldn’t remember any of her dreams. Shrugging it off, she stretched her feet and arched her back slightly, toes curled tight against her feet. 

She stretched her arms up, careful of Tikki in her right palm, and yawned again, a breathy sound that caused movement in her hand. She brought the little kwami back to her, Tikki facing her, as she watched with a soft smile her friend’s awakening. Her red body curled into itself tightly, almost as if she was becoming a ball. Her antenna twitched upwards and into life, followed by her three tail feathers uncurling from her body. She stretched, letting out a big, toothy yawn before her eyes fluttered. 

Marinette leaned Tikki upwards, placing a gentle kiss atop her head and whispering gently, “Bonjour, Tikki.”

Finally, those large, vivid blue eyes slowly opened to half-mast before a content beaming smile took over Tikki’s face when she met Marinette’s eyes. “Bonjour, Marinette.”

Tikki curled into herself and Marinette bit her lip in anticipation. It was like this every morning and though Tikki explained it to her – apparently when kwami slept, they generated a lot of power – she still found it fascinating to see. Tikki curled back into a small, red ball like shape, her form floating up above Marinette before, with a happy cry, she stretched outwards. She scattered red, black, and white sparkles into the air and causing Marinette to beam happily, eyes shinning. She loved the magick that flowed between her and Tikki, a constantly strong and steady bond that thrummed with power. 

She sat up, stretching her arms above her head with a hum and her eyes squeezed tightly shut. When she opened them, she caught Tikki zooming down to Marinette’s desk with a red streak that left Marinette giggling. The teen girl with the raven hair gently ran her fingers through her hair, carding out some of the tangles, as she called down quietly to her kwami, “I locked the drawer Tik. I’ll be down in a minute.”

Tikki peeked her small head up from the ladder with narrowed, sleepy eyes. She pointed down at the desk with an antenna and grumbled, “I need my morning cookies, Marinette.”

Smiling wide, Marinette crawled towards the ladder, giving one last look outside at the bright blue sky through her hatch. She threw her legs off the side of the bed and winced at the cold plastic of her ladder’s rungs when her bare feet hit them. She yawned again, a much smaller one, her body waking up much quicker. She took them one at a time and still managed to tumble down to the floor, falling against her desk to Tikki darting around her head anxiously. 

Marinette looked up at her computer screen and all her thoughts fled as a dopey smile spread over her lips at the screen-saver that greeted her. Adrien. Adrien looped with bright pink hearts and she leaned over to kiss her computer screen, mumbling, “Bonjour, Adrien.”

Before her lips could make contact with computer-Adrien, Tikki bashed into her cheek, turning her head to face the small purple box to the left of her computer screen. The square box was right below another collage of Adrien pictures pinned to the pale purple-pink walls of her room. To the right of the box was a small, flexible goose neck lamp and her computer. To the left on her white desk sat a green open box with small flashcards stacked inside for Marinette’s fashion fits. Sitting atop the green, black polka-dotted box perched the head of a grinning, Cheshire-cat. A couple of small books stacked next to the grinning cat head and everything was all situated below the posters and pictures of Adrien Agreste.

Marinette stumbled to the square purple box and lifted up the Cheshire grinning cat to shake loose a key from a hole in the bottom of the cat head. She opened the drawer, slid the key back in, and placed the cat head back in it’s original place before she grabbed her pink plastic roller chair and flopped down into it. She leaned her arms on her desk, watching as Tikki pulled the unlocked purple drawer on the front down. Inside was a homey little living room made of dolls accessories: a small pink table, a double seated red love-seat that Marinette had stitched cushions for, and, the best of all, were jars lined in the back of cookie crumbs. 

She watched with a smile as Tikki grabbed one, twisted the small lid off, and tilted the whole jar upwards so all the cookie crumbs tumbled into her mouth. She swallowed loudly and set the small jar down gently on the plastic table in front of the couch before her blue eyes opened and she regarded Marinette with something akin to approval. “I feel better, Marinette. Merci.”

Marinette giggled. “It’s no trouble Tikki. I need to get you some more cookie crumbs though. We should have plenty of leftovers in the Bakery. I’ll grab some more tonight!”

Tikki grinned before the little kwami let out a loud burp that caused her red cheeks to darken and Marinette to throw her head back against her roller chair and laugh without abandon. Tikki was a morning person but some mornings, she would wake up grumpy and the only fix, Marinette found, was morning cookies. So, Marinette had turned the little purple box into a sort of den for the kwami so Tikki had personal space if she wanted it. There was even a small wooden bed in the back that Marinette had made, including the thick red comforter, thin red sheet, and two black pillows. Tikki still sometimes thanked her for it and that was last Christmas!

Marinette hesitantly looked at the clock on her computer. She had 40 minutes. With a sigh, she stood to her feet and stretched, standing on her tip-toes and raising her arms as high as they could go. Her body thrummed to life and she hummed as she leaned over her computer desk to open the arched window behind it. A warm breeze blew in and Tikki floated up into it, giggling. “It’s so nice today, Marinette!”

Marinette grinned as she spun towards the white mannequin next to the now open window, judging the outfit that hung there. Tikki floated to her shoulder and nodded. “Oui oui! Wear that Marinette!”

Marinette narrowed her eyes, critiquing her work, a small shred of doubt and self-consciousness making her see all the flaws. She shook her head and Tikki gave her an encouraging hum. It was a two piece outfit she had designed for the warmer weather. Just thinking of all the nights spent up, pricked fingers, sleepy school days, and all the doubts made her feel tired just looking at it. 

The top of the mannequin was covered in a beautiful shadow gray collared shirt that would fall to the bottom of Marinette’s hips. The left collar of the shirt was loose and ran down the front of the shirt, falling beneath the right. The right collar loosely trailed down to the middle of the shirt, where it curved over the left side of the mannequin and blending into the seam. It was a loose shirt with thin sleeves that would be perfect for a day like today. Spring not yet Summer; warm yet cool enough to still wear sleeves. The whole shirt was pretty thin, breathable, and had taken the small designer a day and a half to complete the shirt and another half day – and all-nighter – to complete the pants. 

The pants themselves were simple stitching with basic seams. The pants were form-fitting, a charcoal gray, and were also thin like the shirt above it. Marinette knew she had a pair of black flats with black ribbons – she had added the ribbons – that would gently twist up her ankle in a zig-zag to tie around her leg. She groaned and buried her face in her hands, shaking her head. “Tikki, I can’t wear that!”

Tikki pulled her hands away and Marinette was met with her kwami’s firm blue eyes, paws on her hips, narrowed gaze boring into her. She shuffled her feet and glanced up from beneath dark lashes at Tikki. “You can. You will.” Her expression softened and the little God floated to the outfit, running a little hand over the thin fabric of the shirt. “This is beautiful, Marinette. And you worked so hard!”

Tikki flew back to her and Marinette blinked down at her kwami. Tikki stared up at her with a small smile. “You’re beautiful Marinette! It will look great on you. Have some confidence in yourself!”

Marientte looked at the outfit, eyes roving over it, before she stepped forward and hesitantly reached out a hand. She stopped within reaching distance and asked, quietly, shoulders tense. “And what if today is just as bad yesterday?”

“Then there’s always tomorrow. But if you don’t wear it, you’ll never get your beautiful designs out there. You can’t live on what if, Marinette.” Tikki’s steady voice wasn’t scolding but Marinette felt like a scolded child anyway. “I still don’t think the date is a good idea. But this? This _is_ a good idea. Besides,” Tikki winked at her from her perch near the shirt’s shoulder. “You might just make Adrien notice you.”

Kwami and Chosen stared at each other in complete silence before they both burst into quiet giggles. Marinette grinned and nodded, giving Tikki a wink. “Can you help me do my make-up?”

Tikki squealed and did an air flip before hugging Marinette’s cheek. “Operation Adrien Jaw Drop underway!”

Marinette gently removed the shirt and the pants from the mannequin and headed to the small black and pink vanity in her room, taking a deep breath. She turned on the faucet poking through her vanity’s wood, below the mirror, and watched water pool in the round, white porcelain bowl. When it was full with cold water, she splashed some onto her face to wake up. She pulled open the middle drawer of her vanity and grabbed one of her white, fluffy hand towels. She dried her face and folded the towel neatly, placing it next to the porcelain bowl.

She gave herself one more minute to breathe before she began to undress. As she did, she called to Tikki, “Ladybug and Cat Noir…..Have they ever been, um….”

She blushed, not sure how to continue with that train of thought and unsure of where it had even come from, but Tikki answered anyway from the vicinity of Marinette’s desk. Her words were slow, measured. “Yes. There have been times Ladybug and Cat Noir ended up as lovers. Creation and Destruction are two halves of a whole after all. Most of the time, they were together. The bond and the trust drew them to one another.”

Marinette pulled the shirt over her head, smiling at the way it fit her perfectly. She thought about Tikki’s words, scrunching her nose and furrowing her eyebrows. “Most of the time? What about the other times?”

As she slid her legs carefully into the pants, she waited on Tikki’s reply. Just when she thought her kwami wasn’t going to respond, her voice flowed over the black rimmed, green, pink, and gold folding screen separating them. Her voice was small and Marinette’s heart beat painfully at the thought she had drudged up bad memories for her friend. “It was…..Complicated. Most of the time, they were lovers. Because they loved one another. Their bond, their trust, it drew them together. But sometimes,” Tikki’s voice dropped, forlorn and Marinette’s heart stuttered at the unusual tone. “Sometimes, they remained friends, good friends, with and without benefits. No matter what, their lives were together.”

Marinette left her pants unbuttoned and spun away from the vanity to pad her way towards her desk, jumping over the trap door in her floor, rushing to the slumped, dejected red form of her kwami hunched on the edge of her desk. She scooped her up and cuddled her to her chest. 

Tikki nuzzled her head there a minute, listening to Marinette’s heart, and the small kwami mumbled her fears, “Sometimes, I had to watch my Chosen mourn their Cat Noir. And others…..I witnessed _him_ mourn _her_. It…..It broke not only their hearts but mine.”

Tikki shook herself away, floating up and she looked at Marinette with such intense, devoted eyes that Marinette could only raise a shaking hand to her mouth at the look in Tikki’s eyes. “I don’t want to see that happen to you. So, be gentle with him, Marinette. You were both chosen for this. You don’t have to love him.” Tikki’s eyes softened. “But trust him. Completely. And I will protect you.”

Marinette blinked quickly past the tears in her eyes and all she could mumble through the thick lump in her throat was, “Oh, Tikki…..”

Suddenly, the little kwami shook her head, smacked her cheeks, and looked up sheepishly into Marinette’s confused, conflicted expression. “Enough talk about that! Let’s do your make-up, Marinette!”

She darted off toward Marinette’s vanity and Marinette followed slowly, watching Tikki carefully. Her friend was observing all of Marientte’s make-up in the drawer on the left of the porcelain white bowl, a small hand to her mouth in thought. Her antenna twitched as she gazed over the selections, a small smile on her face. Marinette vowed – watching that small creature and seeing the pain, the memories, she was stuck with that she couldn’t erase – that she would protect Tikki, too. As soon as Tikki beamed and giggled, digging into the drawer, Marinette took a deep breath to steady herself. 

She reached the vanity and glanced underneath with a tilt of her head to find her black flats with the ribbons. When she found the pair, she used a bare foot to pull them towards her, slipping both feet into them with a smile. When she looked up, Tikki had gathered an assortment of make-up but before she could get a good look at what her kwami had chosen, Tikki yelled. Marinette snapped her eyes up to her wide-eyed, arms out kwami in surprise. 

“No! Don’t look!” Tikki grinned. “I want to surprise you.”

Marinette smiled and nodded, closing her eyes, leaning her hands on the vanity. “I trust you, Tikki! Transform me!”

As soon as she said the words, Marinette’s eyes snapped open but neither her nor Tikki could stop the accidental transformation. The red, black, and white magick seeped around her, dusting and ghosting across her skin. It was both cold and warm, pulsing with strength as it formed and moulded around her, spandex tightening against her skin. She felt the familiar weight of the suit pressing against her skin like a stretchy second skin. 

When her mask flew and melded to her face, a power flowed through her in a quick, sharp burst. When she looked back into the vanity mirror with wide, surprised bluebells and open lips, it was Ladybug that stared back. She blinked quickly, fluttering her lashes, before she snorted to hide the laughter bubbling up in her stomach. She reached up a hand to her mouth to muffle her laughter, her hand holding her up on the vanity as she mumbled through breathy laughs and quiet giggles, “Tikki, Spots Off.”

Admittedly, her laughter quieted when she felt the magickal suit – and the power with it – flow away from her like water falling off her body. It swirled in red, black, and white sparkles away from her body, converging in the air to form a ball. Once the mask faded from her eyes, the ball shrunk into a pinpoint before Tikki’s form took shape. With a shake of her head, the magick faded from the room, leaving behind a girl with humor shining in her eyes and a confused yet amused kwami. A moment later, the two burst into giggles, Tikki falling gently to Marinette’s shoulder. Marinette basked in Tikki’s presence and her friend’s giggles, before she pointed a teasing finger up to her kwami.

“Okay, wrong choice of words. Work your magick, Tik!”

Tikki floated, grinning, before she straightened and gave a salute with a single antenna. “As you command, Mlle Ladybug!”

Marinette left Tikki to gather the make-up as she padded across her floor, stepping around the hatch in the floor, and over the rug she loved. It’s pattern was pleasing, it had been cheap, and she loved the soft texture of it. She bounced to her chaise and sat down, leaning over to tie up the ribbons on the flats, hearing Tikki rummaging for the make-up she needed. As she laced up the ribbons, deftly tying them, a thought came to her, one she had not really considered before. 

What would her life had been like if she _hadn’t_ accepted the Miraculous, the first or second time? What would her life be like without magickal earrings, no Tikki, no akumas, no lies? No Hawkmoth or fighting with Cat Noir, no Master Fu, and being a superhero with huge responsibilities? She glanced up at Tikki as she rose, palms flat on the chaise as she leaned back on them and watched the Creation sprite slowly fill her arms with make-up. 

And she realized it was a life she wasn’t sure she wanted. Sure, being a superhero was taxing, tiring, the lies and secrets even more so. But she couldn’t see herself _not_ being Ladybug. Most importantly, she couldn’t imagine a life, now, without the little red kwami that had impacted her life so much and become one of her closest, dearest friends. Tikki was more than a magickal suit and Marinette decided it was about time she told her so.

“Tik?”

The little red kwami glanced back, gesturing with an antenna for her to close eyes. Marinette did so with a small smile, hearing her kwami dump her load of make-up onto the chaise next to her. She could feel Tikki floating before her face, the heat and the magick that always seemed to flow around her alerting Marinette to her presence without even having to open her closed orbs. 

“Yes?” Tikki’s gentle, steady voice brought comfort.

Marinette found herself uttering the words with no problem as she felt the lightest of touches on one of her closed eyelids. “Thank you for not giving up on me. I wouldn’t trade this, all of it, for anything.”

Tikki’s gentle touch remained steady as she finished both eyelids’ eye shadow before starting on Marinette’s lips but Marinette could feel the emotion pouring off the kwami’s small yet emotional body. “I’ve never doubted what you’re capable of. I always knew you could do it, Marinette.” Marinette felt the cool lipstick slide against her lips, curving over the top and bottom before it’s pressure was removed. “I would never give up on you, ever! You could, you know. Anytime, if this ever becomes too much, just hand the Miraculous back to the Master.”

Marinette’s eyes shot open, staring at the back of her kwami’s bobbing form as she placed the make-up back in it’s drawer, sliding it closed. Marinette stood slowly to her feet, going toward her vanity and Tikki, eyes focused on comforting her friend but when her gaze landed on her form in the mirror, she froze, eyes wide at the girl she didn’t recognize staring back at her. Sure, she had dressed up before and sure, Marinette knew she could be pretty – when she wasn’t falling on her face. 

But this was completely new to her. She stepped closer, never noticing the gentle, confident smile her kwami held as Tikki watched her. Tikki was, officially, amazing at doing make-up. The base colour was a burgundy tinted red, almost black. The corner of her eye facing her cheek was a black that shimmered with glitter, fading over her eye into a sparkling dark gray towards the bridge of her nose, all speckled with gold flakes. A dark, black, thick line of eyeliner reached from the corner of her eye near her nose outwards, ending in a thick, sharp point past her eye.

It was all blended perfectly well together, the colours meshing yet matching at the same time both mirroring and contrasting her outfit in the same look. She stared in awe at the girl that looked back. Her make-up coupled with her loose, wavy hair framing her face for once painted a girl she didn’t know and she, disbelieving the image was real, raised a hand to gently touch her lightly painted lips in a coral pink that was subtly noticeable, their glossy shine making them pop out.

Her eyes slowly met the blue of Tikki’s in the mirror as the red bug flew slowly up to her cheek, smiling proudly. “This is the Marinette I see everyday. Except she doesn’t need make-up.” She turned a serious, tender gaze to Marinette’s stunned gaze, giving her Chosen’s nose a gentle pat. “And I see a hero who doesn’t need a mask.”

Marinette lunged forward, wrapping Tikki in her palms and cuddling the small, precious creature up to her with eyes squeezed tight, careful not to cry and ruin Tikki’s beautiful make-over. But it was the kwami’s heartfelt words, the words she hadn’t even known she needed, that made her feel beautiful. “I love you Tikki. I would be lost without you.”

When Tikki cuddled back, her voice was muffled through the embrace to Marinette’s face. “And I you.”


	2. Jules, Jealousy, and Breaking Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette finally gets noticed by Adrien but it's not exactly what she hopes it to be. Could a chance encounter - a LUCKY encounter - change everything? She makes a new friend, deals with a painful heart, has the best friend anyone could ever ask for, and gets Adrien Agreste sent to the principals office all in one day. Could her life get any worse?

Marinette loved Tikki, she did, and their heart-to-heart chat in her room had not only lifted her spirits but made her feel like maybe she _could_ do this whole teen-superhero thing. But moments like this were where she wished she wasn’t, well, as Tikki had put it, a Marinette. She threw open the school doors, breathing heavy as her flats tapped against the asphalt of the courtyard. She raced for the metal green staircase in the back, leading up to the second floor and Mme Mendeleiev’s class that Marinette was currently late for. 

She had missed Mme Bustier’s class but vowed to search her out and explain after school but for now her biggest concern was getting to Mme Mendeleiev’s physics/chemistry lab on time. The purse that contained Tikki was jostling by her side as she ran and she sent her poor tag along a silent apology. Her pink school bag, with the black bow she had sewn on, was hitting her back with each step she took up the metal stairs. Her flats vibrated against the metal and when she hit the top step, she stumbled but kept momentum as she dashed down the hall towards the classroom she knew like the back of her hand.

Marinette thought, for once, she might just make it on time and – 

Her eyes went comically wide, arms flailing out in front of her, as her left tripped over….Something?…..And she was sent tumbling into the classroom door. Letting out a sound resembling a squeak, a cry, and a gasp she tumbled straight through the door and landed on her chest, her arms thrown out and comically blinking at all the eyes staring at her. Her cheeks darkened in humiliation, lips twitching in an effort to try and smile. 

She heard fast approaching footsteps and then a firm, steady hand gripped her arm as Alya – she would know her best friend anywhere – helped haul her to her feet. She brushed off her shirt and when the room remained silent, she looked up in confusion, eyes darting from student to student and to Mme Mendeleiev to figure out why. All the eyes were on her, even Mme Mendeleiev’s deep blue eyes were wide and it seemed like the whole class was staring towards her in….Awe? She glanced to Alya for answers but her best friend, standing in front of her a bit to the right and still holding her right arm, was staring with her mouth agape and stretched in an open grin.

Marinette blinked, looking around trying to find the source of their stares of awe, her gut bubbling in curiosity.

It wasn’t until Kim stood to his feet, holding out a shaking finger that was pointed dead at Marinette and shouted that she finally understood. “Who is this cute and sexy girl and what have you done with our sweet, innocent Mari!? Have you been akumatized? Because, damn, Hawkie’s getting better!”

Marinette flushed bright red. For a moment, she felt dizzy and the fleeting thought she might pass out popped into her head as she realized exactly what everyone, including their teacher, was staring at: _her_. The classroom seemed to shake itself out of it’s stupor while Marinette cursed herself inwardly for trying to be normal and – 

Her gaze fell on Adrien and everything stopped. Bluebell met bright green and all that mattered was him and her, his eyes boring into hers with a look that had her heart racing, her stomach clenching, and her body tingling. His green gaze was fixated on her, his green swirling and melding in his eyes. It felt like a wildfire brushing against her body and when his eyes trailed – slowly, oh so slowly in a way that made her heart leap into her throat – down her face and over her body, her blood thrummed through her veins.

She felt alive, watching his eyes skim her outfit before his eyes trailed slowly back to her face. The look in those green eyes took her breath away because oh God – the heat and the way his green eyes turned into molten emerald pools had her heart hammering through her body. The spell was broken when Alya pulled on her arm towards the wooden benches situated up the first step. Her orbs fell away from the intense stare as she was herded to her seat, sliding in with Alya right behind. Mme Mendeleiev narrowed her blue orbs in warning, stating rather briskly and sharp, “You aren’t late, Mlle Dupain-Cheng, but an entrance like that is not acceptable in my class.”

Marinette nodded meekly, the high of Adrien’s gaze and her lost mind returning to realize the embarrassment of the situation. She hastily dropped her pink bag to the side of her desk and pulled out the physics textbook, opening to a random page and holding it to her darkening cheeks. She looked at the blurry words on the page to avoid the giggles of her friends and the deep stares she could feel from Alya, Nino, and Adrien. 

She felt Tikki nudge against her hip subtly from inside the purse at her side in encouragement as she stuttered out, mortification settling in. “P-Pardon, Mme Mendeleiev….”

Blue eyes narrowed, dark purple hair gleaming from the sunlight of the tall windows across from her, and white lab coat draped across her form created an imposing woman and Marinette hid deeper into her shoulders. Letting out a satisfied breath, Mme Mendeleiev turned away from Marinette and finally, she felt she could breathe. She lowered the textbook slightly, bluebell orbs peeking out over the top, loose black-blue hair swishing over her shoulders as she gazed slowly around the room. Most of the focus had shifted to the lesson but she could see, _feel_ , the intense desire of everyone to question her.

Chloe was practically drilling holes looking back at her out the corner of heavily make-up framed eyes, her ice blue gaze almost chilling. There was a deeper more vulnerable emotion swirling in their gaze but when Chloe met Marinette’s eyes, she gave her a glare and turned away sharply. Sabrina dutifully whispered comfort, giving Marinette her own Chloe-version glare. Marinette winced, instantly feeling self conscious at all the eyes on her and Chloe’s dismissive attitude towards her felt colder than usual.

Why did she do this again? Sure, Adrien had noticed her but….What even was that that had happened between them? And now, her whole class had seen her, all the attention focused on Marinette outside of Ladybug’s mask. It was…..Awkward. Yet, she felt a sense of confidence and exhilaration that, yes, Marinette could be noticed too. She buried her head in her textbook and ignored the pointed, sharp, and heated look of the stare to her left, wondering if it was too late to regret this. “I can feel you staring at me.”

The waves rolling off Alya were intense. “This is _not_ what I expected. But, girl, daaaaaamn, you look hot.” Marinette flashed horrified eyes to Alya who was grinning slightly, just a quirk of her lips and not meeting her hazel-gold eyes like usual. She shrugged casually, pulling out her own notebook. “What? Don’t give me that look! It’s true!”

She snapped her eyes back to the textbook she held, words still a mysterious language she couldn’t understand, and mumbled through the colour draining from her face as she realized this was not Marinette. This was not who she was and she began to feel queasy, stomach flipping. “I didn’t expect this either and now I regret it.”

The sound of Alya’s notebook paper being flipped to a blank page was the only sound between them. Mme Mendeleiev’s voice droned through out the classroom as she taught gibberish to Marinette’s ears. She winced. She really needed to pay attention or she was going to fail. She had a responsibility as Ladybug to save Paris but she also had a responsibility to herself to pass physics as a teenage girl without the mask of Ladybug to hide behind. Her stomach slowly settling down, she put down her book and reached over her bench to pull a pink notebook from her bag.

She put it on the table, flipping it open to a blank page, and pulling the pen out from the wire in the middle of the notebook she had stuck in there before. As pen hit paper, Alya’s quiet tone of voice drew Marinette’s focus. “Why didn’t you tell me what you were planning? I would have helped you, you know that, Mari.”

Marinette glanced over to Alya out the corner of her eyes. Wavy, brown hair tinted copper-red about halfway down and fading into gold at the tips was falling over Alya’s shoulders as her eyes read the words being wrote on the chalkboard before scribbling them down. Her hazel-gold gaze flickered towards Marinette quickly then back to the board. It was only a glance but it held so much meaning. 

Her pen slowly scribbled to a stop as her eyes welled with tears at the dejected look in Alya’s gaze. “I know. I’m sorry.” She turned back to the small amount of words she had wrote down not truly understanding any of them or the lesson. “I-All I seem to be doing is the wrong thing.”

Alya stopped writing to face Marinette, gesturing to her outfit with a single hand, her expression softer. “This is definitely not the _wrong_ thing, girl. That,” Alya gave her a lopsided grin and a wink. “Is the right thing. Just….You could have told me. I would have loved to have come over and helped you.”

Marinette thought of Tikki and deep conversations, knowing in her gut that spending time with Tikki that morning had been the right thing to do. She began to slowly write the words Mme Mendeleiev was spewing onto the blackboard. “I’m sorry, it’s just….I had to do it myself. But I think it was a mistake. This isn’t me, is it?”

Alya’s crooked smile and highly raised eyebrows was enough for her and both girls nudged shoulders. “I almost didn’t recognize you but Mari, it is SO you. It’s beautiful! And I don’t recognize the brand, sooooo,” Alya scrutinized the apparel before she held up a finger, wagging it back and forth with a grin. “This must be a Marinette design.”

“What!?” A quiet whisper exclaimed from below them and both girls’ heads shot down to the table below them. 

Nino was looking up at them, specifically Marinette, his chocolate brown eyes wide in surprise. His jaw was so slack, Adrien, who was glancing between all three of his friends with amusement, slowly lifted it up to close. 

It fell open again a minute later when Nino’s hushed, excited whisper filtered between them. “Mari, that is a beauty! You got skills with a needle!”

Marinette flushed, smiling shyly, and looked at her friends from beneath long, black lashes. She pushed a stray strand of her black-blue hair behind her ear, Adrien’s green gaze immediately falling to her. And then her ability to speak fled. “Uh, um…..T-You, thanks.”

Alya’s sympathetic pat on her back did nothing for the girl’s red face and Adrien’s eyes still gazing at her. They were a lot less heated, not like burning emeralds, and more like the lush green of a wind-whispering field: gentle yet focused. It made her heart pick up speed as he gave her a lopsided smile of pure, unbridled happiness that the Sun faded. “Nino’s right. Beautiful, Mari.” His eyes met her and her speeding heart practically flew out of her chest as he stared into her eyes and called her beautiful. “You want to be a fashion designer, right? Well, you’re so amazingly talented. You’ll have no trouble getting into anywhere you want to go.”

Not only had speech fled her but so did conscious thought. Alya’s wide, excited eyes and frantically tapping fingers on her back did not help. So she said the first thing that came to mind. With a shout. “You’re beautiful!”

She immediately clapped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide, as Alya completely lost it and shoved both her hands over her mouth to muffle her giggles. Nino’s eyes glanced quickly between her pale face and Adrien’s flushed cheeks, hand scratching those golden locks. Adrien’s eyes left hers as his embarrassment grew and, feeling eyes on her, looked up. Her eyes met the deep blue of an arms crossed Mendeleiev and dread slammed into her when she felt all the eyes of her classmates on her trembling, pale form.

Mme Mendeleiev opened her mouth, eyes firm, but it was Chloe’s voice that turned all heads to the blonde as she picked at her nails, confident smirk in place. “Looks like someone has a little crush.”

Marinette could feel her heart hit the floor as her eyes burned with mortified tears, her lip wobbling. Mme Mendeleiev opened her mouth to scold both girls but a surprising voice joined the fray, all heads snapping to the green eyed boy who was staring at his desk. “So what? Leave her alone, Chlo. I started it.” His eyes met Mme Mendeleiev’s blue gaze and he shrugged. “So if anyone needs to be sent to M Damocles, it’s me.”

And that was how Marinette Dupain-Cheng got Adrien Agreste sent to the Principals office. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“He hates me. He is definitely going to hate me after this!”

Marinette pulled at her black-blue hair with both hands, face scrunched in concern and self-loathing as she paced by the metal stairs. Alya was sitting above her on the fourth step, watching her best friend pace with a small smile. Marinette counted herself lucky she had made it to the end of the school day alive and not melted on the floor from embarrassment or mortified guilt. 

She looked up the stairs Alya was sitting on and towards M Damocles’ office, waiting for that head of golden blond hair to appear so she could beg for forgiveness. 

“Mari, girl, calm down. You’re doing that thing we talked about.” 

She dug a flat into the courtyard’s asphalt as her hands fell from her hair to the black straps of her pink bag thrown over her shoulders. “Overthinking?”

Alya’s smile widened as she quietly affirmed, “Overthinking.”

Marinette glanced up with a sheepish smile, eyes softening as she mumbled, “Sorry. It’s just….”

She glanced up at the closed door but Alya – really, what would she do without her best friend _and_ her superhero best friend, the second of which Alya did not know – was quick to deflect her thinking with a sigh and a flippant hand gesture. “Girl, he will be fine. Let’s talk about the real issue.” Alya’s expression became calculatingly devious and Marinette took a hesitant step back. Alya’s smirk grew as she leaned slightly over her knees. “Agreste called you beautiful.”

She sighed and repeated what she had come to realize, blue eyes digging into the courtyard’s ground. “He called my outfit beautiful.”

Alya shrugged, not the least bit deterred. “Same thing.”

Marinette’s lips tightened into a thin line as she felt her heart sink, the familiar feelings washing over her helplessly. She always, somehow, messed up what she wanted to say to Adrien. She could never get it right with him. “It isn’t, Als. Because I want him to notice me and for the first time in my life, I thought he did.”

“Mari, he definitely did. Did you miss the whole smoldering ga-ga eyes he made at you? Because, girl,” Alya whistled and raised her eyebrows, an excited twinkle sparkling in her hazel eyes. “No one else missed it.”

Her face darkened at the remembrance of the look that made her heart want to explode in a burst of warmth before she shook the image away. Looking up at Alya’s relaxed posture, she mumbled, “How are you so sure?”

She leaned back against the metal steps on her forearms, looking up into the cloudless, bright blue sky. She never lost the smirk. “That he thinks your beautiful? Because you are.” She looked down at her to send her a wink, causing a smile to bloom over her face before Alya turned back to the sky. “Or are you asking about sunshine not hating you?”

She dug her foot deeper into the asphalt, her toes bending, and Alya didn’t have to glance down to know her question had been answered. “He couldn’t hate you, Mari. It’s impossible to hate you. Least of all sunshine boy.”

Marinette giggled and rolled her eyes as she gazed at Alya’s form, hand falling to her side and gently holding Tikki’s purse in her hand. “Alya, stop!”

Alya laughed and finally glanced down at Marinette’s amused, exasperated face with a grin. “Calling him sunshine boy? No. Have you seen his hair, girl?”

“Should I be jealous you’re looking at other guys’ hair or be flattered it’s my bro?”

Alya tossed her head back, wavy brown hair falling to the step she was leaning over, lips stretched in a happy, broad grin as she greeted her boyfriend. “Yo, what’s up boyfriend?”

Nino grinned and gave Marinette a thumbs up as he sat behind Alya on the top step, his hands falling to Alya’s shoulders. His dark brown eyes remained on Marinette as he spoke. “Really, Mari, your outfit is sick, dude! Beautiful. Not like you weren’t before! I mean, uh, you totally were!”

Nino scratched his head, his dark skin flushing as he smiled awkwardly. Both girls burst into giggles before Marinette waved away his compliment with her free hand. “Merci, Nino. Besides, I’m used to Alya. She’s much more blunt.”

“Hey!”

Nino and Marinette shared quick amused looks as Alya looked between them both with narrowed, teasing eyes. Her look was broken by the smile she couldn’t hide. A dark twinkle burst into her eyes as she leaned against Nino’s groin on the step, looking at them both with confidence. “I know secrets about both of you. Don’t make me spill.”

Marinette pressed her lips together at the horrified look Nino shot down to his girlfriend, his mouth agape. She felt her stomach flutter and tense with the held back giggles, already knowing there was only one thing Alya didn’t know about her. After all, if Alya had found it she was Ladybug, there was no way Rena Rouge wouldn’t have let her know about it after the fight with Ondine last week. She took a step back, prepared to leave her friends to it while she went to her locker, but her back hit something solid.

Something solid that went ‘oomph’. Eyes wide, she spun and instantly apologized. “Pardon! Are you hurt? I am so sorry, I’m such a klutz!”

A deep chuckle caused frantic bluebells to look up – this boy was tall, she could almost feel her neck cramping – into mocha coloured eyes. Two arms raised up, palms open, as the boy smiled at her. “Hey, no harm done. It’s okay.” He shrugged before he tilted his head, the gesture reminding her too much of a black clad cat. “Are you okay?”

She bit her lip, his stare and the tilt of his head making her stomach flip uneasily at the resemblance to Cat Noir. She shoved the feeling down as she looked at the ground, unable to meet his eyes any longer. “Y-Yeah. I’m fine!”

He chuckled again and her skin tingled, a blush dusting across her freckled cheeks and the bridge of her nose. A loose strand of blue-black hair fell from behind her ear but before she could right it, a large thick hand moved the strand back, the tall boy’s fingers grazing her jaw as his hand fell away. Marinette’s eyes widened as she took a good look at the strange student she hadn’t noticed before. 

He was tall, the tallest boy she had ever seen. From her peripheral vision she could see Kim, crossed arms as he glared the taller boy down, a snickering Alix standing next to him. She focused back on the boy whose hair was also a light, sun-kissed blond. He had those unusual, light, creamy brown eyes that were staring at her in amusement, radiating a friendly aura that had her nerves calming down inside of her slightly. 

He had a very sharp, triangular shaped face with narrow, deep-set eyes and a thin nose. His sun blond hair was thick and wavy, curling over his forehead in little wisps. He had strands poking up in the back that had her stifling a smile at the way it looked more like he had rolled out of bed rather than bothered to comb it. 

He seemed to notice her stare and glanced up at the strands hanging over his face before turning back to her with a parted smile as he grabbed a strand with two fingers. “Yeah, doesn’t matter how much I comb it, it looks like this by the time I leave the house.”

Marinette smiled, hands clasping behind her back as she rocked on her black flats, nodding in agreement. “This is the first time I’ve wore my hair down to school. It’s been…..”

His smile softened as he raised a single, thin eyebrow. “Different?”

She nodded, glad someone understood, and to her utter surprise, he bent his head of fluffy, unruly blond hair towards her as he mumbled, “Go on. Give it a ruffle. Only fair since I touched yours.”

Feeling her heart thump in her chest, she reached hesitantly out towards the blond hair. Her hand ruffled the locks quickly, once, before her hand was instantly at the purse hanging over her shoulder at her hip. She could feel Tikki buzzing around inside and she flushed, brought back to exactly what she had done when his head lifted and he gazed at her with a wide, toothy grin. 

“I don’t bite!” He looked at her outfit, eyes slowly perusing her, and a deep part of her shivered at the odd, lidded gaze she couldn’t quite decipher. It didn’t feel like Adrien’s bright green eyes and her back grew taut. “Really, you can relax. I promise. But, hey, if I’m making you uncomfortable, I can just, leave?”

One of his large hands gripped his arm as his eyes instantly flew away from her, gazing off at one of the upper floors. A small blush dusted his cheeks and Marinette’s stomach hardened in guilt. She had made this poor boy feel bad and he had been nothing but nice to her! So, in typical Marinette fashion, she opened her mouth. And regretted it. “We could have dinner tonight!”

He blinked wide eyes down at her and when she heard the loud, breathy gasp, followed by the choking of air being drawn in too quickly from Alya, Marinette’s face darkened to a dangerous shade of red as she realized what she had spouted. She flailed her arms in front of her, trying to explain. “Um, f-for, uh…..Running into you! And-and making you uncomfortable! As friends!”

He blinked and then threw his head back and laughed, the sound causing Marinette’s pounding heart to finally settle. He looked down at her and finally held out a single, large hand for her to shake. “Sure! Friends sounds good to me.”

She took his hand and he gripped her fingers gently, turning the back of her hand upwards before he raised it to his lips. The moment before those lips touched her hand and she thought she would faint, she was jerked back just as a bee buzzed in front of her face. She squeaked, her hand being jerked from the boy’s with such force, she wobbled into the form gripping her upper arms tightly. 

The boy was just as surprised as she was as he mumbled his name to the open air where she had been standing. “….I’m Jules, by the way. Jules Moreau.”

Marinette blinked, confused herself, and tilted her head back to see who had pulled her away so suddenly. Her bluebell orbs opened wide and her body went numb as she gazed at the underside of a jaw she would recognize anywhere. His golden hair – a much brighter, softer look than Jules’ – glowed in the sunlight falling through the open roof of College Francois Dupont. Her heart stuttered at the narrowed look he was giving Jules who was now facing them with an equally confused gaze. 

His chest rumbled with the sound of his words and Marinette felt her heart jump into her throat at the intensity. “There was a bee.”

There was an awkward, tense silence before Jules’ shoulders dropped, hands open as he gestured with his eyes towards Marinette, held by her arms in Adrien’s tight grip. “Is she, uh, allergic?” 

Pulling away, Marinette gave Adrien a confused stare, blinking back at him, before she turned to Jules and gave him an apologetic smile. “Jules, this is Adrien.”

She moved back so Jules could step forward, hand extended, a broad grin stretching his face. “Oh, the Agreste model! Yeah, I heard about you. Great model. I’m, uh, Jules.”

Adrien looked at the large open palm, forcing a smile as he gripped Jules’ hand tightly. “Adrien.”

His curt tone caused Marinette’s confusion to sky rocket. She had never heard his voice so deep and sharp, like a knife cutting through the air. Her confusion must have shown on her face because when Adrien’s eyes fell to her looking back and forth between them, he turned away and let Jules’ hand fall from his own. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and, with his shoulders hunched to his ears, slouched towards the entrance doors. Marinette took a step after him, her hand lifting, but she froze when he gave her a sharp look.

His green eyes were steely and she could see the anger swirling in them, directed towards her, and she thought she heard her heart shattering into a million pieces as he spun his blond head angrily around and then he was gone. 

Her eyes welled with confused, angry tears of her own when a large hand fell to her shoulder as a quiet voice asked her, “Hey, you okay? That was pretty intense over there.”

“Move aside, best friend coming through, giant dude.” 

Jules – dubbed Giant Dude by the foxy girl – moved aside instantly, stepping back, and letting Alya wrap her tan arms around Marinette’s hurt form. It was a side hug and though Alya was the same height, Marinette buried her head between her best friend’s neck, her cheek against Alya’s scratchy, dark blue cotton sweater she wore. Her nose grazed Alya’s neck and she took a shuddering breath just as she felt a hand connect with her shoulder. Thinking it was Jules, she tensed.

Alya’s voice rumbled through her neck and her friend’s fingers threaded through her loose hair, gently comforting her. “It’s just Nino, babe. Jules is being a good giant and sitting back. He looks confused as hell though, and girl, so am I.”

Marinette swallowed the thick lump in her throat as she remembered those eyes glancing banefully back at her like she was a disaster. She found herself mumbling, “I was right. He hates me….”

“Yo, Mari, it’s okay. I don’t know what’s gotten into him but, don’t worry! He doesn’t hate you.” Nino’s hand gave her shoulder a squeeze. “I got your back. I’ll go find out what’s up with him.”

She heard the thudding of Nino’s sneakers as he darted after Adrien but Marinette couldn’t find the strength to pick up her broken heart, arms hanging loosely at her sides as Alya combed fingers through her hair. 

“My boy’s got you, girl. And so do I.”

She blinked back tears, grimacing as she sniffled quietly. “Always?”

Alya responded without any doubt or hesitation. “Always.”

She sniffled again before she felt Alya twist her head to shout over to Jules who must have still been hanging out behind them and she felt bad for excluding him. Alya tightened her hold so she couldn’t twist in her arms to look back at her newly made, well, was he a friend? “Giant, you gonna be man enough to escort me and my best friend to her home?”

Jules gave a nervous chuckle. “Uh, yeah, as long as she doesn’t, uh, mind me knowing where she lives?”

Alya twisted back to glance down at Marinette’s tucked head. She rolled her bluebell eyes to her friend’s. A voiceless conversation passed before Alya turned back to Jules. “It’s fine. You man enough for it, big stuff?”

Marinette could feel Jules radiate, like the sun, a brilliant smile from behind her. “Am I man enough to escort two beautiful ladies home? Hmmm, yeah, think I can handle it.”

Alya gave her one more tight squeeze, whispering into Marinette’s ear facing her friend’s lips, “You can cry when we get to your room. Let’s get you home, babe. Me and Giant have got you. I promise.”

Marinette took a deep breath and slowly lifted her head, calming her painfully beating heart but Jules didn’t seem bothered as he stepped between them and held out an arm for each of the girls to take. Alya’s reaction made Marinette burst into giggles as Alya stared at the arm as if it had offended her on some deep, personal level. She stuck out a finger to shove it gently away before she looked up at Jules with raised eyebrows.

“Oh, boy, you sweet sweet boy. You sure are new aren’t you?” Her pathetically pitying eyes and the dejected shake of her head caused Jules to become flustered, the tall man’s eyes nearly bugging out of his head as he waved his arms to try and placate her. Marinette completely lost it when Alya patted Jules’ blond locks like a dog. “Don’t worry, you’ll learn real quick, Giant.”

He turned to Marinette as Alya flipped her hair behind her, turned her back, and stalked confidently towards the school doors, her hips swaying. Jules was left gaping, wide eyes glancing slowly to Marinette who was wiping tears of mirth from her eyes. “Should I be afraid of her?”

Marinette gave him a soft, pitiful look. “Yes.”

He breathed out a deep sigh of relief, giving her a crooked grin that sent her pulse racing at the boyish sweetness of his look. “Good. Because I am.”

She linked her arm with his and the two headed off after Alya who was waiting by the school doors, arms crossed, and looking out with that same confident smile in place. “She’s a very good reporter. She can dig out any secret. So, uh, yeah, be afraid.”

Except that I’m Ladybug, she thought quickly to herself. But Jules brought her out of her thoughts as he leaned his head down towards her to whisper, “What if I don’t have any secrets?”

Marinette sighed in pity and gave his arm a gentle pat with her free hand. “Then you should fear her even more. Embarrassment is her god given talent.”

Jules swallowed thickly. “Must be great to have a best friend like that, uh….”

He looked down at her, his head still tilted to the side, reminding her of a puppy still and she giggled, unable to resist lifting a hand and ruffling his hair. He blew it back with a happy grin. “Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

He scrunched his mouth and then pronounced her name in a decidedly final tone. “Marinette. Hmm….I guess everyone calls you Mari huh?”

She shrugged. “Some of the people close to me do.”

He hummed and then, in that same tone, told her, “Then I won’t call you that. What’s your favourite colour?”

The sudden question prompted an answer before she could think about it. “Red.”

“Then, I’ll call you Red.” He looked down at her quickly just as they reached Alya to give her a wink that reminded her of glowing green cat eyes.

He turned to face Alya, shoulders lifting, puffing out his chest, and letting Marinette’s hand fall from his arm. “I know your secret, woman of truths. I have no secrets. Your evil magick works not on this giant!”

Both girls blinked at him, then each other, then back at him before the statement – and the ridiculous over-the-top tone – broke through. It started with a giggle then became full blown laughter as Alya leaned her back against the open school door to keep herself upright and Marinette had to curl both arms around her stomach when it began to hurt from the laughter bubbling up inside her. For once, she didn’t think about anything but the laughter in her chest and the blond giant who had eased her worries. Maybe they _could_ become friends.

Apparently, Alya thought so too. “You know, Giant, you might just fit in all right.”


	3. To be Ladybug or Marinette? That Is The Question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jules is adopted by Alya and Marinette while, internally, Marinette has a breakdown. Can she truly shoulder the responsibility of Ladybug? She's only a teenage girl and all her dreams have been shattered by the weight on her shoulders. When she's crushed, will she emerge as Ladybug.....Or Marinette? Making a reckless decision may just cost her not only her mask but she may just lose herself in the process.

As soon as she had shut the trap door behind her quietly and opened her red bubbled purse, Tikki zoomed out and butted her little head against Marinette’s cheek as she hugged her as best as her arms would allow. “Oh, Marinette, I am so sorry!”

Marinette blinked at the little kwami holding onto her cheek as she moved towards her vanity to fix her messy hair and ruined make-up. “For what, Tik?”

Tikki pulled back, looking at her as if she was gauging if Marinette was hiding anything before she slowly and quietly asked, “Aren’t you upset about Adrien?”

Marinette paused in straightening out her fluffed up hair, hands falling to the vanity as she thought about it. She looked over at Tikki’s curious face and pinched her lips as she shrugged. “I was. And I am, a bit. But….I don’t know.” She pulled open the make-up drawer to the left of the porcelain bowl to pull out the lip gloss and lip stick. “Alya and Jules helped me feel better.”

Tikki cocked her head to the side, crossing her little arms and frowning. She was looking Marinette over as if she didn’t believe her, trying to find the fault in her words. “But….That hurt me, Marinette, so I can’t imagine how _you_ felt.”

Marinette paused in applying her lip gloss, looking at her reflection. Her bluebell eyes gazed back as she gently pressed her lips together, resisting the urge to pull her newly shiny lip into her teeth. “It did hurt. It hurt a lot, Tikki. I don’t think…..” Her eyes burned and the familiar, painful lump in the back of her throat alerted her of just how much it hurt. “I don’t ever remember being that hurt before.”

Tikki’s arms fell to her sides, expression softening, before she darted to Marinette again and cuddled against her cheek, little feet kicking. Marinette giggled at the affectionate gesture, lifting up a hand to her kwami to cuddle her. 

Tikki’s voice was muffled against her cheek. “I know. I’m sorry. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Marinette nodded, closing her eyes and tilting her head so Tikki was encased not only in her palm but by her cheek and her loose blue-black hair that cascaded between them. “Mmhmm. I will be. I will be okay. Besides,” She opened her eyes and this time, her bottom lip wedged beneath her teeth. “I’m going out with Jules tonight.”

Tikki snapped away, eyes wide. “Ehhhhh!?” She flipped in the air, spinning in a quick circle, before she blinked at Marinette in disbelief. “You are? I mean, when?”

Marinette put her make up back, deciding to just forego the eyeshadow as she faced Tikki floating in shock in the middle of her room. She shrugged casually. “Tonight. As friends, Tikki. I mean, yeah, Adrien hurt me. But…..” She shrugged again but this time her eyes fell to the floor as she fought back tears, blinking quickly to push them back. “I still love him with everything I’ve got. Jules is just….He makes me feel better.”

Marinette could feel Tikki’s disapproval and her shoulders rose to her ears, feeling the lecture coming before her kwami’s voice even floated between the silent room. “Marinette, are you sure you know what you’re doing? Shouldn’t you….Speak to Adrien before you go out with Jules? What does Alya think?”

The memory of her conversation with Alya outside the bakery flashed through her mind as she blinked at her wood floor, the wooden trap door glaring up at her. Jules had escorted her to her home, Alya and Marinette chatting away happily in front of him. He had simply walked behind them, sometimes casting in a smile or a chuckle at something said, but he had simply let them be. He was…..An odd guy. Tall, blond, and definitely dream worthy – as Alya had whispered loud enough to cause a red blush to darken his alabaster cheeks. 

When the Bakery had come into view, Marinette couldn’t quite forget the excited, happy look Jules had thrown her away, like a begging dog for scraps. Laughing, she had called through the door if her Mom wouldn’t mind bringing them out just a couple of leftovers from the morning rush. Sabine, ever the doting and loving mother, brought them the leftovers, sweet tea she had made, and three small, wooden chairs – carried by Tom because what kind of man leaves his wife to do the heavy lifting? 

Embarrassed but thankful for her parents, she had hugged them and they had left them alone – besides creepily looking out the Bakery windows to spy, to which she had given them a stern glare and, thankfully, they had backed off. So she had found herself sitting with Alya and Jules in the Spring air, eating leftover croissants, macaroons, and three danish pastries along with three tall cups of her mother’s famous: Lotus Sweet Tea. It was a Chinese sweet tea she made every Spring and though Marinette didn’t know the reasoning or the story behind it, she knew it was delicious and always left her feeling happy.

Her and Alya had watched Jules devour everything he was given in a record amount of time - “Seriously, I will never complain about my boy’s eating habits. _Ever._ ” – and it was Alya that had openly teased him, “Geez, slow down! What are you, a starving dog or something?” 

He had looked up, mouth full of danish and croissant, eyes wide with his excitement and both girls had burst into pearls of laughter before Marinette gathered the ability to speak. “I’m sorry but, we don’t feed strays here.”

Dogs, she thought secretly. Cats on the other hand…...She was pulled from her thoughts by Jules. As soon as he swallowed, he blushed, head ducking into his shoulders. He looked like a scolded child with crumbs littering the corners of his mouth, ruffled blond hair, and a crooked grin. “I, uh, really like sweets. Sorry.”

Marinette held up a hand, giving him a small smile. “No no, it’s okay. I sometimes bring sweets to school for my class. I’ll make sure to pack extra for you.”

Those glittering, cream-coloured eyes were bright when they gazed at her as if she had given him the greatest gift he had ever received. “You’re an angel, Mlle.”

Alya nudged Jules from her spot next to him with an elbow as she licked the macaroon dust off her fingers, winking. “This place is like my second home so back off Giant, find your own Bakery best friend.”

Marinette smiled as she watched Jules glare teasingly down at Alya, sticking his tongue out quickly. “Who made you Queen?”

Alya blinked up at him, shaking her head slowly. “Uh, me?”

Jules spun his head around, blond hair flying, and glanced at Marinette as if she held all the answers. She jumped at the sudden attention. “I’m allowed to come back, right? Cause….” He fidgeted with his hands, and the picture of shy, embarrassment on the overly tall, giant man was enough to make the girls send squealing glances at his cute demeanour. “I honestly can’t live without your Bakery’s sweets now.”

Marinette laughed as she leaned over to place a small hand in-between his fidgeting ones, drawing his gaze up to her own. “Of course! Thank you for, uh, agreeing to go out later. With me. As friends.”

She pulled back, blushing, when his eyes lit up, excited glimmer surrounding him. “Really? You were serious?”

She shrugged but he was already standing, grinning down at her and Alya, glancing between the two of them with such a happy, broad grin they both answered his with ones of their own. Without thinking, he leaned down to Alya and kissed one of her cheeks and then dashed to Marinette. She squeaked and tried to lean back, forgetting about the wooden chair, and his lips left a wet kiss to her cheek. She laughed as she scrubbed at it with one hand, watching Alya glare up at Jules as he grabbed his messenger bag and flung it over his back with a single hand.

He moved away, waving, happily telling them, “Don’t be shy! See you tonight, Red! Bye, LB!”

Marinette’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets at the initials and she faced Alya with a growing iron ball in the pit of her stomach. “L-L-LB?”

Alya, who had been glowering – pouting – with her arms crossed, was staring off at the fading form of Jules but she raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, Giant’s nickname for me when he found out I run the LadyBlog.”

“So, LB stands for….”

Alya turned to face her and shrugged, rolling her eyes, but her lips were pulling into a content smile. “LadyBlog.” She faced Marinette, her eyes giving one last quick glance after Jules’ disappeared form. “You know, I think he’s growing on me. Can we keep him?”

Marinette giggled and bit her lip, mouth stretched into a grin. “I’ve always wanted a pet.”

Both girls laughed and Alya moved her seat over, closer to Marientte, and leaned her head on Marientte’s shoulder as both teens basked in the Spring sun and the gentle yet cool breeze that flowed over them. “Are you really going out with him tonight?”

Marinette tensed slightly but Alya nudged her with her head and she relaxed again, leaning her head onto Alya’s wavy hair. “Yeah. He’s….Sweet.”

“But he’s not Adrien.”

It wasn’t a question and Marinette knew it. But she felt she should respond anyway. “No. And….He’s not replacing him. I don’t like Jules, like that. It’s just….He makes me feel, I don’t know,” She gestured off after where he had run to vaguely with her free hand not holding her tea. “Better? Content? Happy? Like, even though Adrien doesn’t notice me like I want….”

“…..He does. Notice you.” Alya leaned up slowly, giving Marinette a steady, analysing stare before she nodded and picked her own tea off the ground to take a chug. “Girl, you’re plan to make Adrien jealous might just work.”

She had forgotten all about her plan. Sipping her tea with both hands, she stared at the ice in the glass cup, watching it pop and jump in the dark colour of the tea. “I can’t use Jules like that, it was a stupid plan to begin with.”

Alya grinned. “Told you, girl. But…..” Her grin faded to a slightly more stern smile as she leaned her elbows on her knees, glass in one hand as she gazed out towards the park from their perch outside the Bakery. “Are you sure you should go tonight? Jules is…..He is sweet but,” She faced Marinette, her eyes conveying what she couldn’t say. “Are you sure this is right?”

Marinette looked up into those eyes and the iron ball in the pit of her stomach that had dissolved returned, weighing her down heavily. “Yeah. I need to do this. Maybe, you know, going out and having fun might take my mind off things.” She felt her resolve strengthen and Alya’s eyes softened when Marinette’s must have projected her need for normalcy, for something to take away the ache. “Maybe I can just be myself for a while.”

Alya reached over, pulling Marinette into another side hug, her head pressed against the fluffy blue cotton of Alya’s sweater where she could vaguely feel a heart beating. Alya set her chin against Marinette’s head and squeezed her tightly for a moment. “You can always be yourself with me Mari.”

She thought of a red suit and black spots and felt her eyes burn. She wished she could, wished she could just open up and say she was Ladybug, say she knew Alya was Rena Rouge, just open and _talk_ …..But she couldn’t. A memory flashed through of hurt glowing slit eyes and a voice snapping that keeping the secrets hurt. 

And all she could mumble was, “One day I will.”

“Hmm? What did you say, Mari?”

Marinette had only closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around Alya, squeezing tight to the only lifeline she had. 

“Marinette!”

She was jolted back to the present by Tikki’s concerned shout, the kwami floating inches in front of her, large eyes worried. Marinette gave her a shy smile as her cheeks dusted pink at being caught in the memory from earlier. “Sorry, I’m here. I was just,” She gestured vaguely to her head as she moved around Tikki and towards her computer. “Remembering a conversation with Alya.”

She sunk down into the hard plastic of her red, rolling office chair and leaned her arms onto the white desk where her computer was placed. She put her chin on her arms and looked at the black screen, knowing if she moved the white mouse that her screen-saver would pop up onto the screen and she didn’t know if she could deal with that right that second. She simply stared at the black screen, hearing Tikki darting around her room. She stared at that black, fathomless void of her computer screen, watching out the corner of her eye as sunlight peppered her floor from the window behind her desk.

The light and the shadow danced together, blending, and it reminded her of Ladybug and Cat Noir. Something as simple as light and darkness, two things that shouldn’t blend, but couldn’t exist without each other. She twisted her head, letting her cheek rest against her arms as she focused on the light and shadows. She wasn’t aware of how long she sat there, arms folded, eyes half-lidded and watching the light slowly fade away to nothing until Tikki flittered into her line of sight. Marinette blinked at the tired, sleepy expression of her friend and knew that the sprite must have fallen asleep earlier.

Tikki’s mouth opened in a large yawn before she mumbled, rubbing one eye with one of her antenna, “What time are you going out with Jules?”

Marinette leaned up, wincing at the sharp pain in her neck, before she nudged the white mouse with her elbow. The black faded to a collage of green eyes, golden hair, and a beaming smile that sent her heart racing still. She smiled softly up at Adrien Agreste’s image before she glanced down at the time in the corner of the screen. 

The sun was setting but the time still read 5:42pm so she bit her lip as she pushed herself away from the desk. Pulling her feet onto the chair and wrapping her arms around her knees, Marinette gazed at the picture of Adrien. “Don’t know. Didn’t make a time. Sometime this evening.”

Tikki blinked at the unusual response and Marinette could see her visibly waking up at the odd response. “Aren’t you…..Going to get ready?”

Marinette leaned her head back off the chair and gave a one armed shrug. “We’re just going as friends, Tik. I don’t need to get all fancy. This is fine.”

She could feel her kwami’s hesitancy with the awkward atmosphere and she sent her a reassuring smile but Tikki was not fooled. She darted towards Marinette and floated within eyesight, cocking her head to the side. “Okay…..Well, I’ll be there to make sure he doesn’t do anything untoward!”

Tikki held up her little hands and grinned, the fighting stance making Marinette giggle, but she remembered the horrible conversation she knew she had to have with Tikki. Her kwami was not about to be happy. “Hey, Tik, can I…..Ask for a favor?”

Sensing the tension in the air, her hands dropped and Tikki slowly floated a few feet back, eyes narrowing in on Marinette like a bug under a microscope – ironically. “Anything, Marinette.”

She sat upright, the tips of her toes falling to her floor, and she fidgeted with her hands in her lap, tucking loose strands of her hair behind her ear. “Just this one night, can I…...” She looked up, pleading. “Can I be Marinette?”

The little sprite jolted, as if she hadn’t expected that, her eyes wide in understanding. They fell half-closed, shimmering with unshed tears, and her little antenna drooped. “Oh, Marinette…...You never stopped being Marinette. _You_ are Ladybug, not the other way around.”

Marinette’s shoulders tightened as she lifted one hand, shaking, to one of the pitch black earrings and fingered it gently. She met Tikki’s eyes, her own soft and pleading. It didn’t take long before Tikki tensed, eyes snapping open completely wide, her body loose in shock. “You don’t mean……?”

“Just for one night.” She pulled off the back of the earring in her left ear and pulled it out, setting it in her palm as she clasped the end back together. She was left with one earring but her eyes trained to the ground, unable to look into Tikki’s disappointed gaze. “Please, just let me be normal and I’ll never take them out again.”

Hot warmth built up in her eyes, heart clenching, and she bit her lip harder to fight them back. There was a sigh, then, a small red body butting against her forehead. Marinette looked up slowly, blinking the tears back quickly, preparing to meet the kwami’s blue disapproval. That was not what she saw; well, not _all_ of what she saw. There was disapproval and disappointment, and she winced at those emotions in Tikki’s eyes, but there was also a warm, deep understanding that forced a couple of tears to break free and flow down her cheeks.

With two hands stretched across her cheeks, Tikki caught them and muttered, “I don’t think this is safe. What if you need me? Or there’s an akuma?”

Marinette shrugged loosely. “That’s exactly what I mean. I can be Marinette but…..Marinette can’t forget she’s Ladybug.”

She was being unfair, selfish, and she knew it but Marinette felt it deep within her that she _needed_ to do this. For once, she wanted to remember what she had dreamed being a normal teenager felt like, what it meant to not worry about saving the world and instead just passing history. Regretting Ladybug and the earrings and Tikki was not something she could ever do. Tikki was one of her best and closest friends and without the little red kwami, she wasn’t sure what she would have done: as Ladybug and Marinette. 

Being Ladybug…..That was beautiful and amazing and exhilarating! But also hard, demanding, and sometimes, when she couldn’t sleep and curled up alone in her bed in the little loft of her room, she cried. Because sometimes she _hated_ the responsibility, the duty, but she also cried because she knew she was never giving up. She couldn’t – wouldn’t – quit. Marinette was Ladybug and she didn’t regret it but sometimes: she _did_. Sometimes all she wanted was to not worry about the lies building up between her and her family, her friends. 

The lies were eating away at her, chipping away at the truth, until she wasn’t sure any more what was a lie and what was truth herself! She had secrets to keep, responsibilities to keep, a duty to adhere to – and she would. She would not abandon her earrings but just for tonight, one night, she wanted to be Marinette; slowly, she was forgetting who Marinette even was. She was Ladybug, inside and outside of the mask, she knew that and she had accepted it, whole-heartedly. 

She gazed into those large, expressive eyes and she saw it click in Tikki’s head the moment the little kwami’s eyes glistened with tears. Her little lip wobbled before she shoved her small body as tightly to Marinette’s nose as she could. Marinette squeezed her eyes shut and brought up both of her hands to cup the kwami to her and the two basked in the words, the emotions, the thoughts between them. Their bond, a red string with black spots, tightened around them and Marinette knew Tikki understood. This hadn’t been the first time a Ladybug had struggled with her identity. Marinette wondered what, in the end, they had chosen. 

And instantly, she felt bad. How many times had Tikki been ignored? Forgotten? Shoved aside? How many times had this kind, compassionate kwami tried her best for her Chosen and how many times had they ever tried for her? Feeling silly for her emotions, Marinette uttered, “I don’t want to hurt you, Tik.”

And, as compassionate as always, Tikki pulled back. Her narrowed look was put off by the tears glimmering in the corners of her eyes as she firmly told her, “No. Don’t apologize for feeling the way you do.” Her expression softened. “I love you, Marinette, and I understand. You need this. You don’t have to wear them, but….Take them with you, take _me_ with you…..Please?”

Marinette blinked back the tears, sniffling, and gave a watery smile. “Thank you.” She looked towards her purse she had thrown onto her chaise and nodded towards it. “I’ll carry that with me. The earrings will be safe inside their box and inside the purse.”

She watched the God float towards the purse and Marinette’s heart broke – and she almost took back everything she said in a heart beat to erase the moment Tikki slumped in the air – when she ran her little hands over the flowers sewn into the front of it. “Okay.”

Eyes burning, Marinette felt her bottom lip wobble and gripped it between her teeth. Tikki didn’t look at her and neither one of them had the heart to comment on the kwami’s voice breaking. “I’ll be waiting for you, okay?”

Marinette nodded knowing the God would know without even looking at her. The hand on the bag trembled and Marinette closed her eyes, reaching up for the next earring. She pulled off the back with shaking fingers and hesitated at the final moment. Once the earring was out, Ladybug and the suit – and…..and Tikki – would be gone. She would be normal, she would be Marinette, and she wasn’t sure why that thought left her heart feeling heavier than a bowling ball in her chest. She swallowed thickly and, before she could change her mind, jerked out the earring.

The moment she did she heard the sound of magick glittering in her room, small gusts of wind pulling her hair towards the ball she knew was encasing Tikki. She waited until she heard the tinkling magick fade before she opened her eyes. There, sitting in her palm, were both of Ladybug’s earrings, heavy with the weight of the responsibility they held. She pushed away the feeling of wanting to push them back into her ears if only to hear Tikki’s scolding about how this is what she wanted, so go and have fun.

She held them tightly in her palm until she felt them digging into her skin, leaving behind an imprint in her palm, before rising from her desk chair. She stood to her feet, eyes glued to the closed fist where the earrings lie. They were warm and pulsing with magick. She shuffled towards her chaise, falling gently to her knees. Her eyes were wet with unshed tears as she reached for the purse with a trembling hand. Unclasping the red bubbles, she let the earrings fall inside before she closed it with a snap. 

She held the purse with both hands, lifting it to her nose and mumbling, “I’m sorry, Tikki. I’ll make it up to you.”

She stood to her feet and took a deep breath, the purse clutched in one hand tightly just as three sharp, loud raps echoed in her room from the trap door in the floor. Eyes wide, she dived for the lamp on her desk. She let out a yell when she tumbled over her feet – seriously, her own feet? - and toppled head-first to her desk. The only thing keeping her upright was the death grip her hands held on the desk. Pulling herself up enough to reach the switch, she flipped the goose-neck, flexible pink lamp on.

As soon as light flooded her desk, she lost grip and tumbled to the ground with a squeak. She yelped when her chin hit the floor just as her trap door opened to reveal the shy, wide eyes of Jules who was smiling sheepishly up at her. “Your, uh, parents said I could come up?”

“I’m sure they did.” She grumbled as she sat up, feet splayed out behind her crookedly, her hands in between her legs as she pressed her lips together and tried not to blush. 

Jules chuckled and gestured with a hand down the steps that led to her trap door. “I can wait downstairs?”

Grumbling, she shook her head and crawled across her floor on her hands and knees toward her dropped purse where her earrings lay dormant. She look at the purse, the secret held inside, and slowly stood to her feet. 

“Just….Give me a minute. I’ll be down soon.”

She heard the door shut quietly and guilt warred across her features as she slowly set the purse down atop her white desk, in front of Tikki’s Purple Hideaway – the kwami had named it and the name had stuck after a giggling fit. She swallowed back the acidic burn in her throat at the memory, tainting what she was about to do. She let her fingers glide over the flowers on the front of the purse, feeling the earrings inside and whispered, “I’m sorry. I will never lie or ask this again, I promise. Just….One night Tik. One night to be me.”

She turned, her black-blue hair whipping through the air, as she hastily grabbed a black satin jacket that matched her outfit and bent to open the trap door. As the door opened to reveal the warmth of the Bakery, the smells of sweets and bread, and the chatter of her family speaking to Jules she knew she should have felt relief, happiness, even. 

So why was all she could feel an enveloping burn that threatened to consume her from the inside out as she closed the trap door with Tikki locked inside Ladybug’s earrings?


	4. Friendly Dates and Saving The World With Smiles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jules opens up about his past and Marinette comes to the realization that with or without the mask: she is Ladybug. Not all superheroes have the power to save the world, sometimes heroes are the people who keep smiling through the disasters in their lives. Where Marinette learns she has the power to actually save the world. Also: Jules and Alya may just end up competing for the spot as Marinette's best friend. (Alya would win.)

“I really like your parents!”

“Juuuuules…..Can we please stop talking about this?” 

Jules grinned over at her and Marinette knew, most definitely, the subject would not be dropped. When she had emerged, heart wavering and body heavy, from her room she had found Jules sitting right at home on the floor of the living room in front of the coffee table where album after album was opened. Her Dad’s bulky form was on Jules’ left, pointing out the funniest moments – which did include her baby pictures – and her Mom was sat on his right, smiling as each picture came into view. 

She was sure she passed every shade of red that bordered on mortification and embarrassment and also probably created more shades of her own before she had the ability to scream. She had flown over the back of the couch, leaning over by her waist, and made a grab for the album Jules had held. It had taken her a good 30 minutes – not only was Jules ridiculously tall but he was also speed demon fast – to pry the album from him, convince her parents this was _not_ a date, have an awkward talk in the Bakery’s kitchen with her Dad about “safety” before she had screamed and decidedly ran from the room, and dragged the happily waving boy away from the Bakery and over to Place Des Vosges next to her home.

The park was lit up dimly at night with a few lights scattered over the silver, metal fence surrounding the park with the silver street lamps lighting up the fountain in the middle. The clear, flowing liquid was a comforting sound even when she remembered the day she had been dragged into it with no regrets. Her arm linked through Jules’ did nothing to stop the memories of Adrien Agreste’s green eyes in that fountain, the way his gaze had roamed slowly down her, and the awkward, tension filled moment that had passed between them.

She must have squeezed his arm as they came to the fountain because Jules brought up his other hand, gently tucking it against the one wrapped around his arm. His eyebrows scrunched in concern as he gazed down at her. “You okay, Red? Listen, we don’t have to do this, not if you’re not comfortable. Friends, right? But, you know, I mean, we don’t have to –“

She giggled and gazed back up at him fondly, shaking her head. “I want to. I _need_ to. To get out. And we’re friends.” She gave his arm a squeeze and her heart clenched at the absolute joy that spread over his face. “It’s just…..I have memories here and, some of them are a bit hard to deal with, right now.”

Jules nodded before he steered her around the fountain and towards the exit of the park, heading into Paris’ musical, dimly lit streets. “Well, tell me about them. Talk. Sometimes it helps. And only if you want to!”

The boy was full of sugary sweetness tinged shy and it made Marinette relax into him as they walked down a side street. The music, the lights, the chatter of Parisians all invaded the air followed by the smell of the fresh water of the Seine, baked goods, and a floral scent that never really left Paris. Jules led her by their linked arms through the streets and before long, Marinette found herself smiling wide, happy to not feel the weight of the earrings hanging from her ears. The iron ball in her chest, however, did not waver. 

The streets, pretty crowded due to the warm Spring air of a Parisian night, were full of tourists out taking pictures, locals on dates, friends hanging out, and it filled Marinette’s heart with a strong warmth. She loved her city and she would do anything to protect it, protect it’s people. 

She must have been distracted and missed another question because Jules voice, though soft, was firmly dejected. “You’re not having fun, are you?”

Her widened, bluebell gaze shot up to Jules. His head was ducked as he looked down at her, large, broad shoulders completely dejected and those light brown eyes were filled with a sweetness she hadn’t seen before. They sparkled in the night air of Paris’ lights like a puppy that had been scolded for wanting attention at the wrong time – and her heart melted for the gentle giant. 

Giving his arm a tight squeeze, she laid her head gently against his muscled, lean arm and looked up at him shyly. “No, you’re great.” She tensed. “Great friend! I mean, you’re a great friend, and it’s not you, it’s me – Oh, no, I mean – erg!”

Jules’ laughter tickled her ears and she looked over to see him grinning, chuckles making his shoulders shake. He raised an eyebrow teasingly at her. “I’ve known you a day and I’m already getting the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ friendship-break-up talk?”

Marinette felt a smile answering his own as they began to meander at a slower pace through the throngs of Paris’ people, the quiet buzz of speech around them filtering into the air. “I’ve just….Got a lot on my mind tonight. It has nothing to do with you. Typical Marinette.”

She used her free hand to gently press a fist against her head, wiggle it, and stick out her tongue. Jules laughed above her and his arm holding her tightened a bit. “Well, I like you, Marinette. You’re kind and uh, you’re the only one who wants to be my friend. You and LB.”

Disbelief rode her features when she glanced up at him but Jules was watching the walkway, guiding them through the messy, crowded streets. He failed to notice her look but he heard the incredulous tone of her voice when she saw his cheeks darken. She didn’t bother to look at where they were going; she trusted him. “The only ones…..What!? Someone like you? Surely you’re popular?”

Jules did glance down after a moment to shrug before he glanced back up, eyes roving over the groups of people and the shops lining the streets of Paris’ districts. “I transferred to Francois Dupont a couple of months ago and everyone I guess is too scared to speak to me.”

If he had ears, they would be drooped against his head and Marinette felt her heart reaching out to his lonely expression, the wistfulness darkening his eyes. She leaned her head back against his arm, squeezing tightly and pressed her lips together. Her eyebrows scrunched together as she honestly told him, “You are quite tall and definitely a foreigner. That can intimidate anyone but especially local Parisians. We’re close despite how big of a city we live in, and you’re this giant towering over everyone and,” She bit her lip before she uttered the next words. “And you’re excitability makes you a bit, uh, intimidating.”

Jules was quiet for so long and Marinette fidgeted with her hand against his arm, unsure if she had insulted him in some way, before one of his warm, large hands enclosed over the one holding his arm. “Thank you. You’re the first person to tell me that. It makes sense now. I guess….” She felt his arm move with the shrug. “I was being too pushy without knowing I was? You French are a bit private and where I’m from, well, we aren’t like that. Not really.”

Marinette smiled, shoulders dropping as she realized he wasn’t mad at her. Curiosity eat at her. “Where are you from?”

He hesitated when his eyes flicked down to her but then he suddenly jerked to a halt. Marinette squeaked, stumbling a couple of steps and the only thing keeping her upright being Jules’ arm linked with hers, and looked up at the dimly lit cafe. Her flats clicked on the cobbled street they stood on as she took a few steps back, her eyes widening in awe at the little cafe she had never known even existed down this alleyway. Her grip on Jules’ arm slackened as she looked in wonder at the beautiful, quaint building.

It was rustic and older, a bit outdated, and just the kind of thing she loved. The building was built of old-fashioned stone, crooked and endearing. There was a small stone windowsill on the outside that housed an equally small bed of blooming flora on the left beneath a dimly lit window. Through the glass she could make out the light of a flickering candle dancing beneath small fairy lights that glowed orange-yellow in the night of Paris. Laid against the stone cafe was a tall, rectangular chalkboard that had seen it’s fair years of use. 

There were permanent smudge marks from all the erasures and the wood of the frame had been glued shut plenty of times. There was a small written menu beneath a warm welcome that had Marinette’s smile blooming across her lips. Over the threshold of the door, and curling over the left and right windows, was large strands of ivy. The owner had tied the strands together over the open doorway where a large golden bell was strung between. 

Jules held out his free arm towards the doorway, smiling down at her in the glow of the fairy lights, eyes glimmering. “After you, Mlle.”

Curtsying, slowly and still in awe, she shuffled through the door, having to bend down a little to not hit the bell due to the low door frame. She giggled when, due to his height, Jules ended up smacking the bell and the door frame, rubbing his head as his broad frame moved to her side, glaring darkly back at the doorway as if it was the door’s fault he was so tall. 

As soon as Jules straightened, he looked around and reached for her shoulder, squeezing as he pointed to the 6th table in the entire cafe, situated right next to the window with the potted plants. “How about that one?”

She nodded eagerly, darting forward before he could stop her, grinning at the beautiful woodwork etched into the tables. They were antique and had beautiful carvings etched into the tops, the legs, and elaborate designs on the matching wooden chairs. There were two sitting right across from one another and menus laid open on the table top. She flopped into her seat and then her fingers were holding the menu, eyes flashing across the black, silver lined menu. So enraptured by the awe and beauty, she never noticed Jules’ eyes on her until she happened to place the menu down and their eyes met. 

A blush flew across her cheeks to the tips of her ears and she hastily grabbed the menu to hide behind, staring at the words with wide eyes. “I am so sorry!!”

His chuckle was kind and gentle as he reached out a hand to slowly push the menu down from her face to give her a reassuring, crooked smile. “It’s okay, Red. I’m glad this is the place I picked if you love it so much.”

Marinette nodded, pushing stray hair behind her ear as she looked up and gazed around. “It’s beautiful. Thank you, so much, for taking me here!”

Jules held up a hand instantly. “Nope, no thank yous. Not allowed. Now, you asked me where I was from earlier. The answer is Belgium.”

Her eyes widened a bit more, head cocking to the side as her hands ran lightly over the designs etched into her chair. “Belgium? Wow. How did you…..”

She gestured vaguely out into Paris’ nightly streets and Jules smiled. Coming from the gentle, compassionate giant, when the smile didn’t reach his eyes, she noticed something was off. She reached out her small hands, realizing just how small hers were compared to his when both her hands barely equalled the size of one of his, and gave it a firm squeeze. 

His smile was bitter and didn’t reach his eyes as he turned his head to gaze out the window and into the barely lit cobbled street where there was raucous laughter echoing out. “It’s a long, boring, and hard story. Don’t want to ruin our friend-date with it.”

He tried to give her a smile but pain crinkled the corners of his eyes and his smile was too tight. Her heart thudded against her ribs at the look on his usually exuberant and expressive face. “We’re friends, right? Talk to me. I may not be the best on my feet,” She smiled and sent him a wink to which, finally, a true smile pulled his lips. “But I am a great listener.”

He turned back to her and turned his palm upwards to grip both of hers. “Merci. So, uh, do you want to order first, or……?”

She nodded, feeling her stomach rumble in hunger at the smell of the food from the kitchen in the back. “Let’s order first. We can talk over dinner.”

He let her pull her hands back and picked up his own menu, Marinette’s eyes on him even as she picked up her own menu. He wasn’t sad per say but she could see the pain in his eyes like a dull knife. It was there, cutting him, and she bit her lip wondering how to help him. A single hand fell to her hip, feeling for her purse where Tikki – 

Her eyes fell to the words on the menu as her hand slowly rose to grip the menu tightly. Tikki wasn’t with her. The little kwami was locked inside a purse hidden inside two red and black spotted earrings. She wasn’t Ladybug…..And why did that feel so _wrong_? 

“Mlle?”

She jostled in her seat, instinctively yelping and snapping her head up to stare into unfamiliar light brown eyes and a swept back mop of dark brown hair that curled around the serveur’s ears. He blinked at her in surprise, hands behind his back and she flushed dark red when she could see Jules shaking with the effort not to laugh. She looked down at the table and fidgeted as she asked, “Can you repeat that?”

The serveur smiled in an appeasing manner and bowed from his head. “Of course, Mlle. I asked if you were ready for your order?”

Marinette looked down at her menu before she lifted her bluebell gaze and, feeling like the red had faded enough for her to grace the serveur with her features, politely told him, “Sorry, M. I’m ready! I would like the Coq au Vin, s’il te plait.”

The serveur pulled out a writing pad from the pitch black apron wrapped around his waist’s deep pocket and scribbled her order down quickly. He turned to Jules and Marinette found her gaze trailing down to empty spot at her hip. If Tikki were there, she would have found a way to accidentally drop some food for her little friend….But she wasn’t. Marinette had locked her away. Marinette knew, deep down, her decision to do this, to be herself, was not _wrong_ but it didn’t feel right either. 

Tikki had become just as much a part of Marinette as Ladybug had. And she wasn’t sure she could be Marinette without the mask or her hidden kwami anymore but this was the night to sample what life could be like without saving the world. Or lies. Or everything being Ladybug entailed. 

“Marinette.”

She turned, not realizing she had been gazing out the window with her chin resting on the back of one of her hands until Jules called for her. She faced him, head cocked to the side. “Mm?”

He looked down at one of his hands that was playing with a tall glass of water that the serveur had brought, swishing the water around. “Do you…..Are you still willing to listen?”

Marinette’s eyes softened and she nodded, giving Jules her full attention and pushing her worries to the back of her mind. She grabbed her own glass and took a small sip of water to wet her dry mouth. “Of course, Jules.”

He gave her a grateful smile, the light in his eyes reflecting the candlestick to the left atop their table. “I’m a transfer student from, well, Belgium as you may have guessed.”

He winked and she giggled, leaning her forearms on the table as she gazed at him, eyes steady. His smile grew slightly bigger. “My Mom, she’s…..French? Sort of? Like, one quarter or something. And she wanted to move back after…..” His eyes fell to his large hand on the table that had squeezed into a fist before he took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. Marinette felt his pain across the table, her expression twisting into sympathy. “After the divorce finalised. With my Dad.”

She sucked in a breath and grabbed at his hand again. She couldn’t imagine her Mom divorcing her father, uprooting her to China, and never seeing her father again. Warm, empathic tears welled in her eyes as she uttered a heartfelt, “I’m so sorry. That must be so hard. For both of you.”

He shrugged but didn’t look up. “Yeah, well, for me more than Mom I guess. She’s adapted back pretty quick to the French ways.” He looked up from beneath his lashes to give her an apologetic smile that she rolled her eyes and waved off with a gentle smile. “But me? I told you earlier,” Another shrug. “I haven’t really, uh, fit in yet. You know? It’s hard when I don’t know the whole language and people are scared of me. For good reason, too, because well, I am a giant. And more blunt I guess.”

“I would say straight forward.” She teased.

He gave her a mock glare and lifted his other hand to ruffle her black-blue hair with a grin. “Thanks, Mlle. You sure know how to make a guy feel better.”

She stuck her tongue out as she fixed her hair, removing her hands from his and watching as he lifted his glass to take another chug, the glass already half empty. “Don’t worry.” She smiled reassuringly once her hair was fixed, arms back on the table. “You will. Fit in. Unless you’re me.” Marinette gave an exaggerated eye roll and Jules laughed, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed behind his head. “I can barely walk straight let alone make a good impression.”

Jules grinned at her, the happy-go-lucky air that encompassed him spreading to her, and she smiled back. “So, you know why I’m here. Tell me something about you.”

Marinette’s mind flashed to her deepest secret: that she flung herself off Paris’ rooftops day and night to protect the city she loved. Instead, she said, “I’m…..Half Chinese?”

He laughed and shook his head, leaning back onto the table with a raised eyebrow. “Why did that come out as a question?”

She giggled, eyes looking at her new friend from beneath her lashes. “It hasn’t always been something that I was proud of. When I was little…..” She trailed off, remembering her younger days and the crying she had done in her room as a little girl, wondering why she couldn’t fit in. “Well, kids were mean. I guess some of us never really grow out of that.”

Chloe’s ice blue eyes and the undecipherable glare she had given her that morning flared through her memories. It had almost looked….Betrayed. Jules quiet voice caused her to focus on his sympathetic light brown eyes. 

“Oh, I see. Yeah, kids will be kids.” Jules shrugged again and Marinette decided she really liked this tall, puppyish, sweet boy she had dragged into her life. “You be you. And I promise, they won’t matter as long as you be who you are.” Her heart burst into life at the words she had so desperately not known she needed to hear. Jules pointed a finger towards her chest. “In there.”

Marinette swallowed, biting her lip at the warm tears building in her throat and behind her eyes as she whispered, “Thank you.”

His grin faded to a gentle smile that lit up his eyes. He opened his mouth but the serveur appeared beside their table, both sets of eyes glancing over to him. He held a single silver tray with a large, dome top. He held the tray towards the table, pulled off the top, and tucked it into a loop on his apron. He pulled off a medium sized, white bowl and set it down gracefully in front of Marinette. Her eyes widened at the beautiful food and she felt her mouth wetting at the anticipation of sampling the dish. The smell of cooked chicken, garlic, and a few other spices – she thought she smelled pepper – infiltrated her nose and she hummed in agreement. 

The serveur chuckled before he set down a matching white plate in front of Jules and Marinette was brought up, unwillingly, from her own food to glance at what Jules had ordered. She gave an excited gasp as she realized what he had ordered. “That’s my Dad’s favourite! Potato, bacon, and, uh, Camembert cheese?”

Jules grinned and tsk’d at her. “This coming from a baker’s daughter?” He gave another disappointed sigh and, not sure what came over her, Marinette stuck her tongue out, dipped a finger in her juicy dish, and flicked it at him. He gaped and then chuckled. “Good guess! It’s Reblochon cheese. I think it melts better than Camembert and tastes better with the spices and the bacon. I mean, if you use Camembert, that’s fine too!”

Marinette giggled, giving the serveur a grateful nod when he bowed to them before walking away, towards a door off to the right she was sure led to the kitchen. She turned back to Jules and nodded. “My Mom uses Camembert because it’s his favourite cheese. I’ll suggest to her Reblochon!”

Jules grinned and Marinette could see those excited ears and wagging tail behind him. She flung her spoon into her soupy dish and took a bite to keep from squealing at the gesture. And immediately closed her eyes, humming at the taste of the food. Her parents owned a Bakery and this small, quaint little restaurant was becoming a favourite. The food was beyond delicious. It tickled her taste buds and even after she swallowed the first bite, her throat itched for more, her stomach rumbling. 

It was quiet for a few minutes as she took a few more bites, savouring the textures, the taste, and the smell of the food. Jules was shovelling spoonful after spoonful, wide, glimmering eyes staring into his tartiflette as if it was the Sun. Marinette delighted at the feeling that, for once, she was being _Marinette_. Of course, even in the suit, she never stopped being Marinette. But…..She longed for this – this normal date between two friends who simply were enjoying being together, she missed all those nights of sleepovers with Alya she couldn’t attend, she missed not lying to her best friend and her parents and her teachers. 

Marinette missed the normalcy of ordinary life. Her shoulders dropped as she stared into her dish, the spoon halfway to her mouth falling slowly back into the dish with the small piece of chicken and bit of onion dipping back into the soup. The smells and colours of the soup faded together as Marinette let the feelings washing over her sink in. She loved being Ladybug. She _was_ Ladybug, always, and she wouldn’t change anything – even putting on those earrings. She would have done it again and again, she knew that now, but she couldn’t help and miss _this_. 

She glanced up at Jules in time to see him set his spoon into the creamy, saucy half-eaten dish and pick up his water, taking a large gulp and finishing it off. His eyes met hers and he cocked his head in that adorable, sweet doggy gesture Marinette found endearing. She gave him a smile, forcing it to reach her eyes though the glimmer in her blue gaze was genuine. “Are you enjoying your meal?”

He looked down at his half-eaten meal, blinked as if he was thinking, and then grinned so wide Marinette winced, wondering how he hadn’t split his cheeks open. He grabbed the edge of his spoon, got a small bite of bacon, cheese, and a small onion with a bit of sauce and held it out over the table. At first, she didn’t comprehend, staring at the spoon. When it hit her, she flushed and looked frantically around before remembering – Adrien wouldn’t be there and besides, she was supposed to be having fun? Couldn’t she just let go and have fun for _one_ night?

Mind made up, she leaned over and Jules slid the spoon gently into her mouth. When she pulled back, he was practically bouncing in his seat in excitement, his large frame making it look so ridiculous that she snorted through the food in her mouth and had to quickly swallow to avoid choking. “It’s good, right!?”

Marinette giggled and nodded, beaming at him. “Yes! Do you…..” She glanced down at her soup and waved a hand awkwardly over it. “Want to try mine?”

He leaned over the table, broad lips opening in a large, open-mouthed grin. He looked so much like a begging child she scooped up a big spoonful, making sure to get a piece of chicken, and tilted the spoon into his mouth. His lips closed over the spoon before he pulled back, wiggling his nose at the taste. He swallowed as Marinette brought a spoonful to her own mouth and he grinned over at her. “It’s good! Gentle and not too spicy. The onions are a great kick!”

Marinette, realizing she found someone who understood food as much as she did having grown up in a bakery, was quickly filled with curiosity as she stated, “You know a lot about food. Is your mother a cook?”

Jules took a quick bite of his meal, swallowed, and nodded happily, blonde, messy locks vigorously swaying with the motion. “Mhmm. Not an official cook or anything but she’s amazing! She loves to cook. Always trying new recipes. I’m the test subject, of course.”

Marinette laughed at the horrid grimace and wince before she asked, still giggling, “I assume first attempts were not successful?”

His look of horror made her lean over her soup as she laughed. When she looked up, he was smiling that crooked grin that made her pulse race in joy. “Let me tell you: practice _does_ make perfect!”

They shared a giggle and before she knew it, the two engaged into animated conversation as they ate. Getting to know Jules was like learning how to deal with a new puppy. She learned what irritated him, what excited him, how to deal with him, and a little about his past all in one night. It felt like she had known him forever and not just met him at school and a strange, yet comfortable, feeling welled up inside her. It was like when she had met Alya: a recognition, a feeling of camaraderie, and she knew Jules was going to be one of her closest friends.

She learned that his Mom had moved out of France, run away, to be with his Dad and when Jules recounted his childhood in Belgium, he remembered them being happy. He remembered they used to hold hands, used to kiss and joke, and then one day, it faded to arguments. She didn’t ask too much and he didn’t dwell. She told him about her family, what she knew about her Mom and Dad, and how sometimes, their love made her both envious and happy. She told him all about her class: how Chloe was the snob who, sometimes, had a heart. 

She mentioned Alya, and the two shared many giggles over how they thought that girl would one day take over the world with her power. She was a force to be reckoned with and Jules’ eyes had lit up with appreciation when Marinette regaled the tale of their first meeting. Alya’s words - _“The only thing that lets the forces of evil prevail, it’s good people’s interactions, whether they choose or not to do something about it.”_ \- still rang in her head when she donned the mask. Jules had been excited to learn that there was another superhero fan around – apparently, he too loved them.

They traded stories of their lives, bits and pieces, nothing too deep just gentle conversations in a light-hearted way. And quickly, Marinette found that Jules was not just sweet and kind, he was misunderstood. His large frame, unusual personality, and slight accent that bordered on French and not-French all put people off him when all he had really wanted was a friend. He wanted normalcy when his world had been upturned. Like her. 

Her eyes softened and swirled with guilt as she realized the differences between her and Jules: his world had been turned upside down, his ordinary day-to-day had been thrust out of order, and yet here he was, smile still in place. He was persevering and living with the changes. He wasn’t running…...He wasn’t running like her. 

She looked down at the empty table, wondering when their meals had disappeared and how she hadn’t noticed, before she twisted her hands together atop the table. “How are you….I mean, doesn’t it feel, er, weird? Being here and not Belgium? With your Mom and Dad – separated?”

Jules leaned his forearms on the table as his expression softened and became bitter-sweet. He gave a one-shouldered shrug. “Yeah. Of course it is. I mean, I miss Dad a lot. But….My Mom’s….Happier now. And I guess,” He looked at the table, smile melting her heart. “If smiling is how I can make her happier, then, I’ll smile all the time, every day. If smiling is how I can beat evil,” He winked. “Then it’s my civic duty to do so. If I can do something to help my Mom, help anyone who needs me, why wouldn’t I do it?”

Marinette’s heart stuttered and suddenly, she wanted to cry, scream, and throw her arms around Jules all at the same time. The feelings, the problem, the identity criss she had been having? He had just basically solved it, allowed her to see it, and she couldn’t have been more thankful for the doggishly sweet boy sitting across from her who smiled to save the world. 

Somehow, that seemed more powerful than her earrings.


	5. After-Feelings and The Beginning of Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A nightly stroll leaves Marinette flying with revelations that Just Friends Agreste might be more than that one day! But all good things must come to an end. This is the beginning of the struggle for more than her identity. At the end of the night, Marinette may just find herself crashing to the ground. Never fly too high from the ground lest the fall break you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE EVERYONE!!! My laptop broke so I had to reset it and find all my documents and it's been a nightmare! But I promise, this story is still being continued and I will be more frequent now that it is fixed! Thank you for sticking with the story this long! <3 I appreciate everyone who reads this, whether you leave kudos or comment or not. Everyone who reads this, thank you. I appreciate the effort you put into reading it. I will do my best to keep making things you enjoy and that I enjoy writing.

The night air washed over her in a cool yet humid breeze that tangled through her loose hair like fingers. It tickled her neck and she giggled, hands clasped behind her back as she walked with the towering boy with the large chest, broad shoulders, and hands tucked into his pockets. He was walking a step ahead of her, leading them to their next stop, and Marinette felt weightless after their dinner. And the revelations held within. 

But first, she had a bone to pick with him, damn his size. “I told you to let me pay for half. I babysit. I have money!”

Jules didn’t even glance back. “You’re a lady. I’m the guy, the one with the, uh, you know,” He made gesture towards his waist, making them both giggle. “So, nope, sorry, I pay.”

Marinette rolled her eyes, determined through the gleeful haze, to win this argument. “This isn’t some medieval France era. Women have rights. And we don’t need what men have to get it.”

This time, he did look back at her with a mix of pride and slight astonishment, like he hadn’t expected her to say something like that. Honestly, neither had she and she felt her face flush as her embarrassment overruled her body. Her feet stumbled as she waved her arms, trying to reassure him, “No, uh, not like that! I mean, not that your, uh….Isn’t good or anything-NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW! But, uh, well…..” With a groan, she buried her hands in her face and stopped walking. “I’m just gonna….Stop now…..”

His laughter caused her to poke one eye out from between her hands. He leaned down from his waist to see her single visible blue orb, grinning toothily. “And the other one.”

Slowly, the hands fell from her face to reveal a cherry red face with eyes peeking up, her head tilted to the ground as her black flat with the ribbons dug into the soft ground of the small park they had found themselves after dinner. She spun around, avoiding his gaze and the laughter in his eyes, examining the park. She was thankful when the cool breeze hit her flushed cheeks and she took a deep breath of Parisian air. It was musky and ancient, filled with perfume, food, and smelled, oddly, of rainwater. 

It was refreshing and she allowed herself a moment to take in the beauty of the small little park. It was even smaller than the park next to the Bakery, Place des Ves, but it was much quieter in this section of Paris. There was no gate guarding this park and there was no large fountain in the middle. Instead there was a big oak tree with a small wooden bench beneath the boughs. There was a small circle of grass where the tree grew, concreted in, and a circular band of soil surrounding the tree. In another circular band there was a line of shrubs and beyond that was completely made of soft, barely grown grass and soil where her and Jules stood.

There were small, tiny lights hidden in the shrubs and decorating the sides of the bench. She nearly jumped when she felt a hand fall to her shoulder before she remembered Jules’ presence. His hand turned her towards the bench and he nodded his head towards it, “How about a rest?”

She smiled gratefully up at him, her feet beginning to hurt from all the walking they had done through town. Both made their way to the bench and Jules, ever the gentleman, allowed her to sit as his frame was too large to fit with her on the bench comfortably. She sat on the left, curled against the side, and leaned her head back to look into the boughs of the tree. She watched the leaves sway in the wind and fancied she could just see a few stars peeking through the branches. 

Jules stood, a silent sentry leaning against the bark of the tree, with his arms crossed and eyes closed. A small smile played about his lips and Marinette felt a thrum of affectionate appreciation for the tall giant next to her. “Have you ever been in love?”

Jules cracked one eye open to look down at her before he closed it again. He was quiet for a long moment, the only sound between them the rustling of the wind through the tree and their hair. “Is it with Adrien Agreste? You’ve got a good eye.”

She flushed and snorted, waving a hand awkwardly. “Pfft, n-no, what-why would you think that…? Heh heh….” Then, dejectedly, her shoulders slumped as she ducked her head. “…...Yes.”

Jules laughed quietly before his hand fell to her hair and he gave it a gentle ruffle. She sat up, blowing stray strands of hair out of her face – this was why she always kept it up! - and glared half-heartedly up at Jules. 

He wasn’t phased, eyes closed still, broad smile in place. He looked like he was part of the park, a sentry watching over girls with broken hearts. Like her. She stared down at her hands in her lap, playing with the edge of her shirt. “He doesn’t even know I exist…...And if he does, all he can see is-is…….Me.”

“Is seeing you a bad thing? Because, that sounds pretty good to me.”

Marinette shook her head slowly. “No, it’s not. Because Marinette? Marinette can’t even talk to him.” She felt the horrible, itchy burn of tears behind her eyes, a painful lump building in her throat. “I can’t-I’m nothing but a clumsy, awkward girl who can’t even tell him that I like him…..! I can’t even ask him on a date…..”

The dam burst and suddenly, she was crying softly into her hands, tears falling from her eyes. It was more than that but she couldn’t very well tell Jules that she knew Adrien was in love with Ladybug – who was also her but not Marinette. She cried for the times her throat had closed up when faced with those gorgeous eyes gazing at her. She cried for the times she had promised herself, night after night, that she would tell him how she felt and the times immediately after when she failed. 

She cried for the times Alya had comforted her, fixed her broken heart as best a best friend could. Her tears fell for all those lost opportunities, all those lost chances. Tears shattered against the ground, soaking the soil and her hands, as all her feelings welled up and overflowed inside her. She loved Adrien Agreste and he could never love Marinette…..He could never love _her_. When her feelings, her thoughts, overwhelmed her like a volcano erupting, her heart thumped painfully inside her chest. 

A sudden warmth over her back and shoulders was all the warning she got before she was pulled, sideways, into a hug. Her head fell against Jules’ shoulder, his arm wrapped tight around her, gripping her shoulder and holding her to him firmly. His cheek fell against her soft hair as his voice rumbled through his chest, “It’s okay to cry. I can’t catch your tears, and I can’t heal broken hearts. But, you know, I can let you use my shoulder. For free. Just this once.”

She let out a breathy sob-laugh before she squeezed her eyes shut and _cried_. Marinette didn’t remember every crying so hard, for so much, in all her life. She cried for everything, all her emotions burning her throat and dripping like acid from her eyes, leaving moist trails down her cheeks. The pain bubbled in her gut and she felt slightly sick, swallowing thickly past the panic and the pain. 

When she spoke, her voice was hoarse and broken as her body was wracked with sobs. “Don’t ever fall in love. It hurts.”

Jules’ arm tightened around her as his large hand rubbed her arm in comfort. She couldn’t stop the tears or the gasping cries that would wrench free from her as her heart ached inside of her chest. When Jules’ voice rumbled through the night air, Marinette tensed in his hold. “And if you could forget your love for him, just drop it and let go….Would you? Would you choose to forget the pain and your heartache?”

Marinette’s stomach flipped and her eyes narrowed. “But I can’t.”

“No, you can’t. But if you could, would you?”

She sighed, sniffling as silent tears fell from her eyes, rubbing her wet cheek against Jules’ shoulder. “Yes. I don’t want to….I don’t want to be hurt any more. And if I forgot, maybe-maybe I could finally confess.”

Jules scrubbed his shoulder back against her cheek and she smiled through her watery, burning eyes. If he was going to annoy her with stupid questions, she was going for vengeance. His voice was tinged with mock annoyance. “First off, ew. I don’t want your snot trails!” She let out an exhaled laugh before curling more into the giant man’s warmth. “Marinette, I may not have ever been in love, but I do know what it’s like. My Mom…..” 

Marinette could feel Jules trying to keep his body from tensing, trying to stay relaxed. For her. And it broke her heart this gentle boy was suffering and trying to comfort her at the same time. She lifted up the hand attached to the arm his hand was rubbing to grab his lean fingers and hold tight. He had offered his shoulder. She would offer her hand. 

He squeezed back gently with his fingers, chest tightening only slightly. “My Mom _still_ loves my Dad. She doesn’t think I do but-I mean, it’s hard not to, her room is right next to mine and…..” His voice dropped to a sad whisper. “I hear her crying at night, sometimes. Most nights. I see her struggling, every day. But still, she never takes off her wedding ring. It stays on her finger and a couple of days ago I asked her if-if she regretted it, any of it. You know, being with Dad, all the kisses and the good things. If….If she regretted the divorce.”

The wind blew over her and Marinette bit her lip to keep from crying tears anew at the hurt and pain her friend was trying to hide. This hurt him and, momentarily forgetting her own pain, she opened her mouth to speak but his next words caused it to snap shut. “I asked if she regretted me.”

Marinette, heart pounding achingly with shiny eyes and a lump in her throat, instantly shook her head. She wanted to talk, to tell him that none of that was true like how could she choose to forget such a wonderful son? But he beat her to it by raising his free hand from his lap, a finger pressing against her lips. She looked up to find light brown eyes staring down at her. Her breath caught and her stomach bottomed out at the raw emotion in his gaze. 

He moved his finger and leaned his head back, looking up through the oak tree’s gnarled and thick branches. A small, sad smile played about his lips as he spoke. “She said no.”

Marinette nodded, proud of his Mother, and leaned her own head back over Jules’ arm and the back of the bench, tilting it sideways to lean slightly on his shoulder. There was quiet besides the rustling of the wind in the leaves, her sniffles here and there, and both of their quiet breathing. 

When Jules spoke it was with absolute conviction in his tone that what he was saying was right and as the words rushed over her, Marinette felt her body go numb at the truth in them. “She said she can’t regret it. She doesn’t regret the kisses or holding hands or staying up late to wait for him to come home from work every night. She doesn’t regret me. She said that it hurts, it hurts more than anything and sometimes, it takes everything in her to move on.”

Jules shifted his legs, uncrossing them, his arm tightening on her just a bit. “But to regret the love? She can’t. She wants to remember the love they shared because she was happy. She was happy with those memories, with him, and even now, she is still happy with the knowledge that they loved. For years, they were in love, and she told me what I’m about to tell you,” Jules gently tilted his head to stare over at her and she met his eyes. “The pain…..Is just a mark of how much she loved him. And she would never want to forget just how much she loved him. After all, Marinette, isn’t it better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all?”

Her eyes watered as she sent him a watery, shaky smile. “The pain is proof of how much she loves him….” She sniffled quietly, letting a quiet giggle. “So I must love Adrien Agreste _a lot_.”

He snorted a laugh but gave her a single nod, eyes gentle as they looked at her. “And don’t you dare forget it. Red, can I ask you something?”

Her head nodded before she could even think and she lifted a free hand to wipe at the bottoms of her eyes, wincing at the swollen flesh. “Sure.”

Jules’ smile turned into a grin and Marinette may or may not have regretted allowing him to open his mouth. Which he did. “Why do you think Adrien doesn’t like you? Or, uh, notice you?”

Yep, regret. She sighed, looking back up into the branches but she could still feel his gaze on her so to escape, she closed her eyes as she answered him, “…..Alya calls him Just Friends Agreste because he always friend zones me.”

Jules laughed, muffled by a snort, before he mumbled a very insincere apology. “I-I’m sorry, b-but,” Another snicker. “Just Friends Agreste? Wow. He must have really put you far out in the friend zone. Well, why do you think that? And for records sake: Alya is terrifying.”

Marinette giggled as she remembered her best friend and nodded, her heart filling with warmth at the thought of Alya. “She’s great. I wouldn’t have survived without her.” As Marinette or Ladybug, she thought quietly. “And yeah, I mean, sometimes I think he does. Notice me but then….He’ll say something like I’m just a friend and I’m just tired of hoping I guess.”

“Well, I have news for you.” At the smile in his voice, she opened her eyes and looked over at him, sleepy from the bout of tears and emotions that had assaulted her. “He notices you.”

She blinked, her body waking up and thrumming to life, her traitorous heart pounding to life at his words. She felt like she was suspended over a cliff and the next few moments would decide if the ropes holding her suspended broke or not. She could fly or fall. “W-What? What do you-How did you-No, that’s impossible! I mean…..How?”

Jules sat up and she followed, her wide eyes following his every move. The tall boy stood to his feet, swinging around to look at her, his smile projecting his confidence at what he was saying. It sent her heart fluttering away into the night, chest as vast as the night sky. The ropes holding her suspended wobbled. “Earlier, at school. There was this very clumsy girl who ran into this super awesome boy.” He laughed when she chucked a stick at him, thrusting his chest backwards to avoid the flying object. “And this boy, being a perfect gentleman, invited her out to –“

“It wasn’t the super awesome boy. It was the super clumsy girl who asked.”

He glared at her for being interrupted, mockingly, and she shrugged at him. “If you’re going to tell it, tell it right.”

He gave an exaggerated sigh and an over-the-top roll of his eyes before he droned in a dramatic voice, “So! The super clumsy girl asked the boy to a friendly date. There, better? Can I go on?” She waved a hand, not able to hide the grin bursting across her aching face from her crying earlier. He nodded. “Thank you. So the super awesome boy was going to kiss her hand like a Princess, which she is.”

He gave her that dopey, toothy grin that made her and Alya want to squeal at the cuteness of it and she bit her lip to keep from doing just that. Her cheeks darkened slightly as she pushed both sides of hair behind her ears. “Thanks. You’re most definitely an, uh…..”

Jules’ eyes sparkled and inwardly, Marinette wondered if he was part dog or something as she could see him vibrating with excitement. “Oh, I’m the Knight! So, this Knight was going to kiss the Princess’ hand when…..” He grinned and waggled his eyebrows. “The Prince grabbed her and stole her away!”

Marinette burst into giggles, a hand over her mouth as her stomach clenched at the laughter in her gut. “He did _not_ steal me!”

Jules raised an eyebrow. “He grabbed you by your shoulders, pulled you away and to his chest, and glared at me like I was Satan. And, the Prince’s only excuse…..Was a bee. Which Alya has thankfully alerted me that you are not allergic.”

Marinette shook her head, still smiling. “No, I’m not. But,” The harsh glare he had sent her when he headed out the doors, faded her smile slightly. “You didn’t see the look he gave me.”

Jules’ broad smile didn’t even dim. He stared down at her, arms crossed, a haughty, knowing grin directed at her. One of the strings suspending her above the canyon in her mind snapped. She physically heard the snap of it and felt her stomach flip.

“I did, Red. I saw it. And you want to know what it meant? Because I know what you think it meant but coming from a guy’s perspective, which, you know, I am,” He winked at her and a robotic twitch of her lips was all he got. He didn’t look perturbed, actually looked more along delighted at the wheels turning in her head. “It meant something entirely different.”

Marinette stuttered out the only defence she could muster. “T-That was a-a-a hateful look! A glare! Grrrr!”

Jules broke down into a fit of chuckles at her wide-eyed grr sound. He hunched over his stomach, arms splayed across it, and when he righted, his eyes were leaking tears. When he righted, he stuck both hands on his hips as he gave her another ‘tsk tsk’ sound. “Oh dear Marinette. You have so much to learn about a guy’s mind.”

Feeling a bit annoyed and like Jules was undermining her, she narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms over her chest, tapping her foot against the ground. Jules must have noticed because his eyes widened and he flung up his arms in a placating gesture and Marinette winced at the instant flash of guilt and hurt in his eyes that he had hurt her feelings. Okay, so, Jules was very much a dog. If he felt he hurt someone, he would do anything to fix it. The image of him fetching the stick she had thrown caused bubbles of giggles to burst free. 

It was made even funnier when Jules tilted his head to the side, confusion blatantly plastered over his face. She pointed a shaking hand towards the direction the stick had gone and mumbled between giggles, “Fetch, boy!”

She grinned, looking at him, and she almost missed the flash of emotion that splayed out over his expressive features. For a moment, he had looked almost….Surprised? No, it was more like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar. She furrowed her eyebrows, trying to decipher it, but just as quickly he was back to normal Jules and rolling his eyes. “Another dog joke? Alya calls me Giant so you’re going to call me what, Doggy?”

She shrugged. She knew she wouldn’t but he didn’t know that. “Maybe.” 

“Anyway!” Jules held up a finger, indicating he wasn’t done with the previous conversation, and the weightless feeling hit her again. “That, Red, was jealousy.”

Marinette blinked. “Adrien was jealous….Of you?” She snorted. “Pfft, yeah right. Adrien is perfection and sunshine and everything beautiful. Why would he need to be jealous of anyone else when he’s already –“

The moment her eyes met Jules’ with his single eyebrow raised and knowing smirk plastered over his lips, she froze mid-sentence. Looking at her hands fidgeting in her lap, she almost missed the moment when it dawned on her what Jules meant. When the revelation hit her, all the suspension cords but one snapped, leaving her on the precipice of falling to her death or flying. 

She slowly raised her wide eyes to Jules’, her expression completely astonished as she quietly asked, “…..He was jealous…..”

Light brown eyes softened as Jules approached her, his black sneakers scuffing against the ground. He bent down to one knee, hands on the ground holding him steady, as he broke the last restraint suspending her and she felt herself falling, her heart weightless and vibrating. “Somehow, I don’t think it was me that jealousy was for.”

She didn’t fall. 

She flew.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

After she had flown with the news that Adrien Agreste had gotten jealous over _her_ \- suck it Chloe! - she had promptly not been able to function very well. Her cheeks had been dark red and she had not been able to walk straight, too dazed and numb with the knowledge that Adrien Agreste was jealous over her! At the third time she stumbled, nearly falling flat on her face, Jules had, laughing, lifted her onto his back to carry her piggy back style. Her arms hung around his neck, legs wrapped around his waist as his hands and arms held her to him so she wouldn’t fall.

Her ears were ringing, the wind barely a touch on her flushed skin and dazed mind. All she could think about was Jules’ words. She had succeeded, Adrien was jealous, so where did that leave her feelings? Could she give up now? She knew the answer before she even though about it, an explosion happening in her mind at the same time something clicked inside her heart. And suddenly, she was weightless and happy! A strong feeling welled up inside her and she smiled with her chin on Jules’ shoulder as he walked them down a dimly lit Parisian street. 

 

“I won’t give up. I….Don’t think I ever could have. I think I was just-I didn’t think he _could_ like me, like Marinette. So….I didn’t see any signs that he did like me.”

Jules nodded, his chin brushing against her arms clasped around his neck. “You sabotaged yourself.”

She looked at the darkened streets as she formulated a response. “It was more than that. He’s…..Really in love with Ladybug and I-I didn’t think I could compete with her.” 

Because, somehow, Marinette realized she had separated herself from the mask. Ladybug became someone else when in reality, all along, it had been Marinette. A flash of guilt ate at her when she remembered Tikki, locked in the earrings and all alone, forgotten in Marinette’s self-identity crisis. She vowed to make it up to her kwami, finally realizing what Tikki had always been trying to tell her: Ladybug wasn’t Marinette. _Marinette_ was _Ladybug_. 

She tugged backwards with her arms, Jules making a strangled choking sound that made her grin. He coughed before diving teasing narrowed eyes at her. “All you had to do was say something. I mean, you didn’t have to try and kill me! Our date wasn’t _that_ bad.”

She laughed before she tapped his large chest with her hands and he got the message, bending down and gently setting her feet on the concrete walkway they found themselves amongst Paris’ quiet, dark streets. When her feet touched ground, she used one hand on Jules’ shoulder to both hold him down a moment and spin herself to face him, hair flying out behind her. While bent down, Jules’ head was only an inch or two shorter than her own, their eyes meeting. He raised an eyebrow and she had the lovely image of his eyes going completely wide, jaw dropping in surprise, when she lunged for him. 

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders as much as she could, burying her head in his shoulder. She closed her eyes, feeling her heart tighten at the way his hands gently set atop her shoulders, friendly and comforting and so Jules. “Thank you, for tonight, for everything. For all of it. And your friendship is….Probably the greatest thing my clumsiness has ever given me.”

He chuckled and the hands on her shoulders gave a tight squeeze before he mumbled, a soft sort-of teasing joy echoing in his voice. “Me too, Red. Just don’t tell Alya I’ve replaced her or she really will kill me. And I believe her when she said no one would find my body.”

Marinette laughed as she pulled back, stepping back and giving the giant man room to stand to his feet. He stretched before he smiled happily down at her as she clasped her hands behind her back, rocking on her heels. “Don’t get too far ahead of yourself. No one could ever replace Alya.” Jules’ smile twitched, like he wanted to be happy for this information but also saddened, and she rushed to assure him. “But you can be my BBF!”

Jules blinked, raising an eyebrow at the abbreviation. “B.BF?”

She bit her lip as she mumbled out, “Boy best friend.”

He blinked in quick succession before an euphoric grin that melted her entire body from it’s glow erupted over his face. He bounced gently on his toes, causing Marinette to finally let loose a squeak to hide the squeal she really wanted to do at the excited dog-like giant that had become, miraculously, one of her closest friends. “I can do that!!”

She laughed and nodded. “You’ve been great so far. I know my way home from here, it’s not very far. Place des Vosges is right that way!” She pointed to the left, through a couple of darkened streets and an alleyway. “So I’ll see you at school tomorrow?”

Jules’ face darkened, a firm look she did not expect from the always hyper and excited boy. She blinked wide eyes at him as his shoulders tensed. “You will see me tomorrow. But I’m also walking you home.”

Marinette sighed in relief he wasn’t mad at her but instead trying to protect her. She gave him a gentle, grateful look that caused his shoulders to loosen slightly and a smile to crack. “Really, I’ll be fine! It’s right there. See that light?” There was a faint glow in the distance where a balcony resembling her parents’ Bakery stood. “That’s the lights at the balcony. You’ve done enough for me. Besides, I kind of….” She glanced apologetically up at him. “I need this time to myself. To think. And come to terms with everything.”

Conflict warred across Jules’ face as he looked at her, the glowing lights, and the dark streets. “I don’t like this, Red. I should walk you home.”

Marinette shook her head, raising one hand in objection to his open mouth preparing to speak. “I’m not a maiden in distress trust me. Besides,” She smiled and for the first time, it was a complete mix of Marinette and Ladybug, the two parts of her finally coming together. “Paris has Ladybug and Cat Noir, Rena Rouge, too! And who knows how many other superheroes are out there. They wouldn’t let anything happen to me.”

This seemed to do something and Jules relaxed but his expression was still conflicted, touched with concern, and Marinette reached for a hand tucked into his jeans pockets. She pulled one out and held it, raising it to her lips in a very self-assured Ladybug way, kissing the back and giving him a wink. “This Princess does not need her Knight’s company.”

Jules snorted but a laugh broke through his steady gaze, lightening his face as he let his hand fall back to his pocket when she straightened. “This Knight humbly thinks she should stop being stubborn and let her Knight do his duty.”

She grinned, catching him right where she wanted. “Shouldn’t Paris’ heroes be allowed to do their duty, too? Wouldn’t they feel left out if Doggy stole their responsibility?”

Jules’ mouth dropped open. “I-Hey! I am not called Doggy!” His eyes widened as he shrugged, the gesture overly dramatic. “I mean, I wouldn’t be called Doggy. If I was a superhero! Which I’m not.”

Marinette laughed and grinned, backing up a couple of more steps. “It’s okay, I believe you.” She stuck her tongue out. “Superheroes are way cooler.”

He glared at her teasing before he stuck his own tongue out haughtily, the motion making him look like a pouting child and she giggled. “Jules, really. I’ll be fine. I just…..I need this.”

And she did. She needed the time to sort out her thoughts, her feelings, this sudden realization that Ladybug was Marinette, Adrien was jealous over her, and that she was a horrible person for locking Tikki away – something she wasn’t sure she could ever forgive herself for. 

Her expression must have spoke volumes because Jules gave a heavy sigh through his nose before he nodded at the glowing light in the distance. “You better text me you made it home safely. I’m serious. I’m gonna wait up all night until I hear from you.”

Marinette smiled and nodded. “I promise. Thank you Jules. Can you text Alya so she doesn’t freak?”

“I don’t have her num-”

Marinette interrupted him before he could finish. “You do. Check your phone.”

Jules hurriedly pulled out his phone from his back pocket, eyes widening when he did, indeed, see Alya’s name with her number in his phone. He looked so confused, Marinette decided to explain. “She grabbed it when you weren’t paying attention, put in her number, and got yours. You can’t escape her now.”

He swallowed, looking apprehensive as he placed his phone back in his pocket. “I honestly believe if she had super powers, she would be an unstoppable force.”

Marinette remembered a fox dancing across rooftops fighting akumas and smiled. “She most definitely would be. Bonne nuit, Jules.”

She gave him a wave, one he hesitantly returned, eyes watching her like a hawk as he glanced at the dark street and back to her. “Remember: a text!”

As she rounded the corner, out of sight, she hollered back, “Oui!”

When she didn’t hear the pounding of feet behind her, she breathed a sigh of relief, thankful for the quiet and the feeling of being alone to actually process everything. As she walked, hands held aloft, she hopped over the walkway of the quiet street, humming as she did so. Last time she had checked her phone, before they left the park, it had been bordering on 12am and she had texted her Dad saying she would be home by 1 so she knew she had plenty of time to spare. Dancing through the night in Paris made her smile wide, all the emotions curling through her.

Jealousy didn’t mean Adrien loved her like she did him but it was a start. He noticed her and that was enough for her. Discovering that, whether the mask was on or off, she was Marinette had been the missing puzzle piece of herself she hadn’t known she had been missing until it was thrust into place. She looked up at the stars as she pranced through Paris, feeling the empty holes in her ears like iron weights. As soon as she got home, she was putting them back in, overloading Tikki on cookies until she couldn’t breathe, and apologizing continuously until Tikki begged her to stop. Her heart dropped at the thought of her kwami and she looked down at the ground.

She turned towards a dark alley, knowing it was the quickest way home but also the most deserted. She looked around, checked the shadows and finding nothing, before she moved forward, her flats slapping against the ground. She stumbled and when her phone fell out of her pocket, she paused and reached down to grab it. She held it in her hands when she straightened up and that was when she heard it. The last heavy footfalls thudded behind her and she felt a freezing cold race down her spine. Maybe the alley hadn’t been the best choice and the sounds had come from behind her so she knew she couldn’t run that way. Panic clawed at her insides and her eyes frantically looked for anything to defend herself with but the small cramped alley was empty of any sort of weapons. 

She reached a shaking hand to her ear, her frantic mind knowing, in a rush, the dark might shroud her transformation and she could yo-yo away before –

Except her fingers rubbed an empty ear and dread settled into her bones in a cold, heavy ache that made her feel ten times heavier. A numb fear bubbled through her veins and her throat grew tight at the implications that she was in a dark alley, alone, at night, with absolutely no one to come to her rescue. She felt numb, cold, as her hand fell down to her hip. She was frozen in fear, her heartbeat loud in her ears and blood pumping furiously through her veins. Hot tears stung her eyes as fear slithered through her body. 

As soon as she heard the second set of footsteps, she spun around, prepared to face her follower. The alley was empty, dim light from the moon and stars falling into the space before her. She blinked, feeling her heart stutter inside her chest. Maybe she had imagined it? Breathing out deeply, her body began to relax as she slid her phone back into her pocket. 

A large hand clapped over her mouth, her eyes widening and heart exploding, and another wrapped tightly around her torso, holding her arms to her as a solid frame moved up behind her. 

And all she could feel was the terror suffocating her.


	6. Night of Terror and Broken Miraculous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette fights more than her identity, struggles for survival, Tikki breaks the rules, and Adrien has a heart-to-heart with Natalie and Plagg. When he's needed, can he step up and save the girl? Even after he knows whose behind the mask? What happens when Tikki breaks one rule too many? Only luck can save them now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Depictions of minor/major violence in this chapter and references hereafter of said event. If this will trigger you I have placed warnings in sight. If you cannot understand the story without it please message me and I will gladly paraphrase what you missed. Let's all be safe on the internet! :) 
> 
> Me love angst. What more can I say? *shrugs*

\-------MINOR VIOLENCE POSSIBLY MAJOR VIOLENCE BORDERLINE WARNING!!!!!-------

Her lungs and her heart were both expanding in fear as she tried to wriggle in her captor’s hold, twisting and turning, kicking her legs whenever she could. His hand was tight against her mouth as he pulled her slowly back into the darkness of the alley and Marinette felt her stomach drop as she realized she probably should have taken Jules up on his offer. Now, she would never know how Adrien felt, Alya would never forgive her, she was going to make Nino cry for the first time in their friendship, her maman and papa would grieve her endlessly, Jules would be overcome with guilt, and Tikki…...No one would even know about Tikki.

Her eyes welled with angry tears as she squeezed her eyes shut, ramping up her struggles as best she could. The frame behind her – definitely male judging by the lack of breasts and strength of the hold – grunted when some of her hits managed to connect somewhere on his body. So she kept up even when her lungs wanted to explode and her heart began to pump unsteadily. Her eyesight blurred as she got a bit dizzy, sweat beginning to dot her forehead at the effort that was, she noticed with dread, getting her nowhere. 

She swallowed thickly, took a deep inhale through her nostrils, and managed to get a gap in her mouth. The moment her mouth made a movement, the figure pressed harder against her and it gave her the opportunity to sink her teeth into the flesh of one of his fingers, a surge of Ladybug flowing through her and calming her frantic nerves. The moment her teeth dug in she didn’t let go, even when he tried to rip his hand away, gasping in pain. They stumbled through the alley, her attached to his hand like a piranha, digging deep until she tore through his black gloves and hit his skin.

And then a harsh, blinding pain erupted at the base of her skull. She cried out, letting go of his punctured flesh, and whimpered at the intense pain of his free hand curled into her loose hair. He jerked her head back and she cried out again, trying to ignore the sting of pain in her eyes, glaring up into the masked face of the one assaulting her. He was wearing all black, a black face mask covering almost his entire face. She couldn’t see anything about him and she took in a deep breath to scream but he suddenly jerked her hair upright tightly.

She did let out a small, hoarse scream at the pain, tears and spots blinding her at the sharp pain of her hair being pulled harshly. He dangled her almost off the ground by her hair, her feet still planted but not firmly on the ground of the alleyway. She glared at him, gritting her teeth against the sharp, hot fire in her skull. She could see a smile stretch his lips and she felt sick at the way his eyes, a colour she couldn’t quite see, stared into her own before they flicked over her in a slow, lazy manner that made her skin crawl. 

Disgust filled her and her skin tingled everywhere his eyes saw flesh, this feeling crawling through her like a bug and so unlike the heated fire that Adrien’s gaze erupted in her. Thinking of her blond haired classmate, memories flashed through her mind. There was so much she still had to say, so much she had to do. Ladybug had so many responsibilities and so did Marinette. She _wasn’t_ going to die here. Not without a fight. 

Drawing on whatever strength she had left, she flung up an elbow, catching him right in the cheekbone beneath his left eye. His grip on her hair loosened as he staggered back with a cry into a wall of the alley. Marinette didn’t waste time before she turned – with his hand still entangled in her hair, she felt the sharp pain of strands being jerked out – and intended to run out of the alleyway and just scream as loud as she could for help. 

She never got away. She heard a curse and then, to her utter shock, he moved with astounding speed belying his size and crashed into her. He took them both to the ground, his front to her back, and when she hit the cold, stone ground of the alley with her head, she was left dazed. Her head was tilted to the right, a white-hot pressure where she had slammed into the ground. One arm was awkwardly bent beneath her body and the other was twisted painfully behind her back by her attacker. He was sitting up, his groin against her lower back, pressing her arm tightly into her back. Her foggy mind was racing with thoughts, adrenaline pumping fear still into her body as she tried to force her body to respond. 

She could feel pain in her knees where she had hit the ground, her shoulder connected to the arm that was twisted behind her back was burning with pain, her head that had hit the ground was pulsing and throbbing, she had twisted her ankle at one point during the fall, and the boy was pressing his weight against her back and digging her pelvis into the stone ground. But she went sober, the fear and the pain and the fog all dissipating, when she felt him raise up and his free hand gently caressing the skin of her lower back where her shirt had rode up during the struggle and her fall to the cold, hard cement of the alleyway.

A fierce surge of terror and the desire to protect what she now knew was going to end with her possibly raped and bleeding in an alley spurred her on. She began to try and struggle, her head pounding and eyesight blurring. She struggled to lift her head, trying to twist her body but failing at the difficult position of him looming above her. He gave her arm a sharp jerk and she gasped. Fight was beginning to drain out of her as the tears slowly fell and small, desperate sobs tore from her throat when she felt her attacker’s hand move to the belt loop at the back of her jeans.

Then he stopped and for one second Marinette thought that maybe her tears had alerted him that what he was doing wrong. Her thoughts were interrupted with dread when, by her twisted arm, he jerked her up. He stood up abruptly with her and the next thing she knew, her back slammed into the building making up part of the alley. He brought both her wrists together and held them with a single hand against the cold, hard brick and pressing forward until their bodies touched.

She shuddered at the feel of him against her and her body went numb when she felt his leg press between her own. Her lip wobbled, her head throbbed, her body was sore and achy, and not for the first time that night, she regretted being clumsy Marinette who couldn’t even fight off a boy let alone destroy Hawkmoth. She ducked her head, defeat slowly cascading through her, and he nodded, mumbling, “Good girl.”

Those words snapped a coil inside her and she didn’t need magickal earrings to feel the rush that flowed through her then. Those words made her want to fight, made her realize that she wasn’t wearing a mask but she didn’t need to be: she was Ladybug and she was _not_ giving up. If she was dying here, if she was losing an innocent part of her body, she was not doing it without a fight. As soon as she felt his breath ghost across her forehead, she rammed her head upwards. She heard a loud crack but was disappointed when his grip on her wrists didn’t release her. His iron grip only tightened as he growled in pain. 

She didn’t stop. She thrashed and shoved and twisted as hard as she could in his grip, hoping to hit him anywhere hard enough to make him release her. He held tight but she managed to feel some flying limbs connect and those connections spurred her on, her struggling getting more wild until at last, her captor had enough. She cried out when a hand smacked against her cheek, her head flying to the right from the force. Dots spotted her vision and she vaguely felt blood pool at the corner of her mouth from the force. 

Her jaw felt funny, sore, and when she tried to move it, it sent a race of pain through her ear and down her neck. She was forced to leave her mouth parted to not cause it any more pain and she tried to blink back the dots, determined to renew her fighting as soon as her vision cleared. Her captor bent towards her, using his free hand to cup her injured jaw and shoving her face forward. He gripped her jaw with a thumb on one side and curled fingers against the other. The smell of old nicotine, peppermint gum, and slight hint of garlic brushed over her face as his breath puffed over her. Through her slowly clearing vision, she could see him lick his lips.

“You’re beautiful. Why didn’t you notice me…..Why was it always _him_ that had your attention…..”

She didn’t need a lot of brain power to know who him was. Her heart, for a split second, ached for the boy she must have hurt without ever knowing. But he had revealed something to her, something that could help her if she managed to get away: if he knew her and Adrien, he had to go to their school. 

She swallowed the thick taste of blood, her speech slurred slightly through the foggy pain erupting throughout her body. “Ssssorry. I didn’t know. I,” Acidic bile roiled in her stomach but she forced it down. “Do I know you? I thhhhink I would remember you.”

He panted, his breath hot and nasty against her face, before he leaned closer. He brought their mouths closer and Marinette’s panic escalated. She needed to gather the strength for round 2 or she would never get away. “Yes, see, you should have. Because I love you, I do.” He growled, his hold on her hands tightening and she grimaced at the pain in her wrists, a cold numbness spreading down into her arms. “He doesn’t deserve you! He never notices you, not like I would. I would…..”

She only had a split second of his eyes on her face before he smashed their lips together. It was her first kiss and it was nowhere near what she had dreamed of since meeting Adrien Agreste and falling in love with him. This kiss was rough and demanding, his lips slanted against her and pressing against hers feeling like cracked sandpaper as they moved on her own. It was sloppy and he knew better than to use his tongue, keeping only to using it to press against a lip every now and then. When he moaned, thrusting his hips into her own groin and she felt his blatant arousal, Marinette felt the panic claw back up inside her.

She had to get away. _Now_. She closed her eyes, tears leaking from her eyes. She summoned the image of blond hair and green eyes, a smiling face with lips she actually wanted pressed against hers. And she fought, with everything she had as Ladybug and Marinette, she fought. 

\------------------------------------------------END WARNING!!!!-----------------------------------------------

A glowing, sparkling void of white, red, and black existed inside the endless, timeless plane inside the Miraculous earrings of Ladybug where Tikki resided. She hovered, floating in mid-air, with drooped antenna and loose paws. Her three pronged tail was curled into her back as she gazed with shiny, blank eyes at the sparkles flying in the earrings. Her lip wobbled and she felt tears well in her eyes as she remembered that painful, lost look in Marinette’s eyes. Her heart ached for the teen girl that had been chosen for a huge responsibility and if Tikki were being honest, sometimes, she hated that it was Marinette that had been chosen.

She loved this girl, more than any other chosen she could ever remember being with. She hated seeing the way the lies began to slowly eat at Marinette’s heart like a snake dripping acid into bleeding wounds. It eroded into her core and Tikki hated hearing Marinette cry when she thought she wasn’t good enough: good enough to be Ladybug, good enough for her parents, good enough for Adrien, good enough to be _Marinette_. 

Tikki had never doubted anything that Marinette was capable of. The girl had the power to change the world; she was _different_. Tikki smiled gently at the memory. Marinette was different, she was a sudden variable in a solved equation, throwing off everything the little God had known about her existence. She giggled when she thought of the embarrassed Marinette lying in her bed with the kwami herself, both whispering secrets and late night talks when their brains wouldn’t shut down. She remembered the long cuddles and gentle petting through the nights when Marinette struggled with the burden that she had accepted onto her shoulders.

What annoyed Tikki the most was how Marinette didn’t even complain. She took this huge, monstrous, horrible responsibility that a teenager should never have to deal with and she shouldered it. Tikki knew, even though she was sealed, that Marinette would come back, put the earrings in, and she would be Ladybug – she had always been Ladybug. Tikki felt a growl rumble through her as she knew that as much as she hated the idea of Marinette shouldering the burden, she knew her Chosen would, without a doubt or hesitation. Because no matter how much she doubted herself, she would never abandon her duty. And though she doubted herself, Marinette also had the extraordinary ability to be confidently self-assured at the same time.

But that lost, lonely, far-away look had left the kwami feeling heart broken for her Marinette. Tikki trusted Master Fu – he was a Guardian, and the Guardians had always kept the Miraculous safe and protected and were usually not wrong in choosing the intended Chosen – and she knew what he saw when he had chosen Marinette: a brave, selfless, and kind teenage girl who was an X in a world of Y’s. Sometimes, when Marinette slept at night, Tikki would just watch her from a position on a pillow or on Marinette’s chest. 

And she could _see_ the woman, the Ladybug, the Marinette, she would become. She could see the strong, amazing, talented fashion designer/superhero and she could see the way Marinette would change the world, would change the lives of those around her. And for the first time, Tikki understood what Ladybug’s power truly was. It wasn’t that she was granted Luck as a power by some Divine force or Fate; rather, she was projected good luck onto everyone and everything _around_ her. A surprise to even the God-sprite herself: Marinette could change the bad luck, the stagnant luck, to good luck by her presence alone. 

She neutralized Cat Noir’s power and when they were together, they were in sync, their powers and their magick melding together to create a balance that was more powerful than any force on Earth. She believed whole heartedly in Marinette but she couldn’t help the affection that sometimes encased her when she was wide awake and listening to Marinette’s gentle breathing at night. Right now, it was easy: fighting akumas, bantering with Cat Noir and Rena Rouge, learning her responsibilities and her powers…..But Tikki knew the truth of the Miraculous.

It always started off easy. But super villains get desperate, they get only more and more angry, and one day, they stop playing games. One day, they lash out, and Tikki knew what happened. She had seen enough to know that death was possible. The suits were nearly indestructible and invulnerable but that wasn’t always the case. She closed her eyes shut tight as the sounds of distant memories rushed through her ears, antenna curling to her cheeks to try and block out the horrible sound of screams, gasping breaths, choked promises and goodbyes, the sound of weapons shattering, bones breaking, and blood being spilled.

She tried to forget the pain when she lost her Ladybugs but it never went away, watching the light fade from their eyes and the life flee their bodies. As old as she was, she expected death. It was just as much a force of life but she also could never forget the moments when the Ladybug perished and Cat Noir was left with the aftermath. His desperate pleas and tears and cries made her shiver and curl into herself, lost to the thoughts circling her like vultures pecking at her body. Poor Plagg was left to pick up the pieces of his shattered Chosen.

And, sometimes, it was Cat Noir who faded. Those were the worst. Ladybug would be strong, finish the fight, and then…..It was endless nights of nightmares, cries of wanting to just forget, and blame because, damn it, Tikki, why couldn’t you have stopped it!? But she couldn’t. She was the God of Creation and Luck but she couldn’t stop Fate or Time or interfere with Death. And Plagg was left with the feeling of losing another Chosen in the midst of battle.

And that is what Tikki feared most: the day Marinette realized this was not a game – not that she had ever thought that! - but, in fact, a _war_ where death and blood and pain was all very, very real. She dreaded the day Marinette’s innocence was lost and when the teenage girl was forced to become a hero she never thought she had to be. Sure, Hawkmoth was a gentle villain compared to some of the others – different Miraculous not just Nooroo had been used for evil – she remembered but she had yet to see him get truly desperate. She feared the day he had enough of loss and inflicted a blow that would cripple the entire foundation Marinette was standing on.

Her greatest fear was seeing that pedestal crumble beneath her and Marinette’s fall because there was no going back. Once the real war started, laughing at night and dancing from rooftop to rooftop would be over. She feared and dreaded the day Ladybug took over and Marinette was lost. Tikki flung little paws over her face with a cry, spinning away and darting off into the colourful, sparkling void. Her eyes were squeezed tight and it didn’t matter where she flew, there was no escape from the earrings. She was trapped, alone, with only her thoughts and her memories and all the feelings of 8000 years wrestling inside of her.

She wasn’t sure how long she flew about, darting upwards and diving down, flying sideways, doing flips, spinning and twirling and dancing. All she knew was the movement kept her from thinking until, suddenly, she froze. Her tiny form went numb, doused in an icy-cold tremble that made the little kwami gasp in shock. She blinked large, blue confused eyes, wriggling her little nose. Something…...Something was wrong. Really wrong. 8000 years of battle senses tickled her gut and her eyes darted around the sparkling magick, looking for any sign of the cold warning trembling inside of her.

When she couldn’t see anything, couldn’t find anything, she sighed wearily. Great, her mind was now playing tricks on – THERE!

She gasped with pain when she felt her body, every inch of it, feel like it had been stabbed with a needle, all of her, at the same time. She shivered at the feeling, her antenna skyrocketing upwards into straight lines. She remained still, eyes looking slowly around for any sign of her distress. A small tingling in her gut was all the warning she got before Marinette’s face scrunched in fear and a terror so agonizing that Tikki cried out her name passed into her mind. She was feeling Marinette’s pain, her fear! Something was wrong with Marinette, she was in trouble, and Tikki had to save her. She was not losing another Chosen; she was _not_ losing Marinette!

Tikki hardened her eyes, gaze determined as she gazed around the magickal void. Red, black, and white sparkling balls of magick – shaped like Ladybugs – flew slowly around her and the God took a deep breath at the thought of what she needed to do to save Marinette. It was forbidden, taboo amongst not just the Guardians but the kwami themselves: she was going to break the barrier of the magick, of the earrings, so she could be free without needing to be in the Miraculous. It was risky. Any amount of power could backlash and if that happened……

Tikki felt a sense of peace fall over her. It didn’t matter that she could die, that she could permanently destroy the Miraculous, that she could be removed from Marinette’s life…..Forever. All that mattered was that Marinette was safe. Tikki would do anything for this girl. 

She closed her eyes slowly, curling in on herself. Her legs curled up to her chest, paws wrapping around them as her head ducked, forehead touching her knees. Her antenna curled down to the back of her head and down her back as her three pronged tail curled flat against her back. Slowly, she began to draw the magickal energy towards her in a swirl of red, black, and white. It sounded like a tinkling vacuum suction, swirling around in a small tornado. She grit her teeth at the miniscule amount. She needed more, much more, to break the barrier. 

Memories, unbidden, flew through her mind. Her, alone and tired and unprepared for Master Fu to pawn her off to some teenage girl. Marinette’s overreaction to a flying kwami had been amusing. Surely, screaming and stumbling over her desk chair had been overreacting. Being trapped in a glass jar had been amusing too…..Until the girl had called for her parents and Tikki had to phase through the glass to make this young girl understand the severity of what she had been chosen to do. Tikki’s little red body began to glow slightly, her eyes scrunching as she drew in more power, her resolve strengthening. 

The memories kept coming, one right after another in quick succession: that first akuma, the defeat and forgetfulness of Marinette, being locked away again, and the final moment that decided everything: Marinette’s resolve to be Ladybug, her compassion to save her friends, and it was the first time Tikki got a glimpse of the hero Master Fu had seen. This precious girl who only wanted to win her love’s affection – whom she did not know was Cat Noir himself – and be a normal teenage girl. Yet there was never any doubt in her heart that she was doing the right thing. 

Then, tonight’s Marinette flashed through her mind. Those lost bluebell eyes trying hard not to cry and the weariness Tikki had never seen in Marinette before. She felt her lips twitching as she snarled, a horrible numb, burning pain ripping through her body. She pushed on, the sparkling magick swirling into a thicker, stronger tornado. As the magick was dragged into Tikki, a black void was revealed, small white cracks dashing through the empty void of the earrings. A little more, just a little more, and then she could save Marinette.

Her head pounded in a sharp pain and she could feel her magick, the magick inside herself, being pulled and twisted. She cried out but kept pulling, dragging, tears building in the corner of her eyes. More white cracks appeared and finally, the magickal tornado flew into Tikki’s little body. Her red body glowed a deep, pulsing red, black, and white that, with an inhuman screech of indescribable pain, pulsed out of her in a large shock-wave. When she dared open her eyes, it took everything in her to stay afloat as she staggered mid-air in a dazed, numb painful haze. 

Below her were the remnants of Ladybug’s earrings, cracked, broken, lost of all colour but at least whole. The little kwami’s head was foggy and she was floating haphazardly in the small space of Marinette’s dark purse. The only thing keeping her going, keeping her eyes open and keeping her floating, was the sheer terror flooding her body from Marinette. She dived for the purse’s edge, fiddling with the baubles before they popped open with a click. She was gone and out the window in seconds. Her body was raw and tingling, burning, with pain. Her head felt ready to explode and she knew she wasn’t going to be conscious much longer. 

She couldn’t save Marinette. She blinked to clear her vision, grimacing but keeping flight, zooming high above Paris’ rooftops as she darted wearily towards the tall, dark building near the Eiffel Tower. 

She couldn’t save her. 

But she knew who could. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

He slammed the car door closed, breathing deeply and eyes narrowed onto the front passenger seat of the small car that greeted him everyday after school. From the corner of his eyes, he could see Natalie jump in surprise at the slam but he kept his eyes focused on the black leather of the cars’ front passenger seat. He began to tap his foot on the floor of the car as Gorilla shifted the gearstick, moving them into the flow of traffic. He could feel Natalie’s aqua gaze, probing and confused, and even slightly suspicious. 

“Adrien…..” She coughed, removing her gaze from his form and he could feel the stern woman his father had hired coming through, her voice hollowing out monotonously. “You cannot be seen acting so brutishly. It is bad for your image and the Gabriel Company and fashion line.”

He snorted. Red hot anger bubbled through his stomach and into his throat, spewing out like fire from his lips. A dormant volcano burst. “No. Don’t jerk me around, Natalie. It’s bad for _him_. It makes _him_ look bad.” Mumbling beneath his breath, “I can never do anything right by him.”

When no answer or response was forth coming, he dared to glance toward first Gorilla then Natalie. Gorilla had his eyes trained the road, large bulky form a bit too big for the small car. The steering wheel was barely able to fit in both of his hands and he was constantly ducking his head gently to avoid towering into his full height and bashing his head against the roof of the car. Natalie, however, had on an expression he recognized instantly. 

And he felt bad. Uncrossing his arms, he let them fall to hang loosely by his sides. He let out a weary sigh and gave her an apologetic look. “Sorry, Nat. I shouldn’t…..Have taken this out on you. That wasn’t fair. It’s just…..” His tapping foot stopped as he struggled to find the words. “It’s just so frustrating being a teenager!”

It was unusual to hear Natalie Sancoeur laugh but every time, it made Adrien feel relaxed, happy, and he couldn’t stop the small smile his words had wrought on the usually stoic woman. Her hair was parted in it’s usual style, dyed bang folded over her hair tied into a bun. She was looking at him the way his Mom used to, content and amused and _warm_ , and for a moment, Adrien forgot this woman wasn’t his mother. She damn well did a good job trying to parent him and he knew he didn’t make it easy. 

Giving her a gentle, appreciative smile he waited for her to speak. The small, barely noticeable tilt of her lips was enough for him but, even though Natalie was good to him and clearly cared, he still felt the twinge of longing for his Mother’s arms. 

“It doesn’t get any easier being an adult Adrien. I know your father is hard on you. Losing Emilie was….” Natalie’s expression fell, as if she couldn’t quite decide what to feel, before it melted into it’s usual mask. “A terrible blow to both of you. He’s hard on you because he does care, Adrien.” She must have saw his shock because her aqua gaze narrowed him. “He does. But you-you just remind him of her so much, he doesn’t know how to handle that sometimes.”

Adrien knew he looked like his Mother: golden hair, bright and expressive green eyes, and a warmth that could probably melt the Sun. He knew that and he still felt angry, betrayed, that his Father couldn’t even see that Adrien was in pain, too. He was too focused on his own misery, the Company, finding babysitters for his teenage son, and keeping him hidden from the world. After today, he hadn’t thought he had any part of his Father inside him. Not until Marinette had shown him that, yes, he was indeed a full-blooded male and definitely his Father’s son.

He shot up straight, folding one leg across the other and blushing as he scooted as close to the door as he could. He tilted his body towards the door, pretending to be caught looking out the tinted windows. His thoughts, however, were on a black-blue haired girl who sat behind him and taken his breath away. When she had stumbled – typical Marinette, he thought fondly – into the classroom, he had not expected the rush of blood to his face or any part of him really at the way she had looked so…..Attractive. 

Sure, he had always thought she was cute. The way she stuttered around him was, he had to admit, utterly adorable. Her big, kind heart was something else he both admired and liked about her. What he found the most cute about her was the way she looked at him when she thought he wasn’t looking – and he, unconsciously, usually found his eyes on her. She looked at him with those sparkling, bluebell eyes, pink rosy cheeks, nervously shy smile, and the stuttering…..He loved to hear her compliment him in broken sentences just to hear her try to correct it. He loved how, when she looked at him, he felt like she actually _saw_ him, the real him, and not just Adrien: sometimes, he felt Marinette could see he was Cat Noir. 

He loved and found the most cute about her the way she _got_ him the way no one else did. She looked at him like she needed him and the thought that someone in the world actually needed – wanted – Adrien Agreste made his heart swell for the girl. And that was what he liked about her. She never forgot a friend, she never abandoned anyone when they needed her, and she was quick to defend someone and give them a second chance. Adrien Agreste liked Marinette’s big heart and he liked how he was included inside it.

He inhaled deeply and nearly choked on the air when Natalie asked, “Who is she?”

He snapped wide green eyes to the small smug smirk she wore that was not directed at him with her eyes but he knew was meant for him. He swallowed and laughed a bit too loud, awkwardly. “W-What makes you think I’m distracted? I’m not! It’s-why do you think that? A girl?”

He winced at his awkward wording and Natalie’s one aqua eye when it slowly landed on him said she knew where his thoughts had been. “I am not blind, Adrien. Who is she?”

It wasn’t an order to tell her and he didn’t have to, he knew he didn’t. But he could tell Natalie wanted to know, she was asking him. He wanted to be honest with Natalie. He looked at the hands he fidgeted in his lap, blonde hair falling into his eyes. “…..Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

He could hear Natalie hum in thought before she seemed to remember her – how could she have forgotten her? “The Baker girl who won the derby hat competition.” Then, a deeper recognition lit her blue gaze and she turned her head with raised eyebrows to fully face Adrien who was keeping his head ducked. “The girl who was going to play Ladybug with you in Clara’s music video.”

Adrien nodded. He felt Gorilla pull the car to a rolling stop and roll down the window, knowing they were at Agreste manor’s gates. His heart fell at the thought of being behind bars again. “Yeah, her. She was…..Different today. Just-Different.”

Natalie seemed to be amused, he could feel it, and when he tilted his chin up to look up at her from one green eye, her look softened. It wasn’t noticeable if you didn’t know Natalie but he did. And he saw the affection in her eyes. She reached up a hand hesitantly, as if she wasn’t sure if she could touch him, before her lean fingers brushed some of the stray hair from his face. 

She smiled gently at him as the car pulled to a stop. “She’s a sweet girl. Your Mother would have loved her.”

And Adrien felt hot tears in his eyes, the hot lump in his throat burning as he realized that, yes, his Mother would have loved Marinette. Somehow, the thought both grounded him and made his heart soar. All he could do was nod. The emotions in the car broke when Gorilla opened Adrien’s door for him and Natalie smoothed her face out. Adrien sighed, knowing what was coming next. 

Natalie held up the gray tablet she was never without, sliding up a finger through his schedule before she replied, eyes still scanning the tablet. “You only have to study for your Russian and English and study the sheet music for the piano to play tomorrow.”

Adrien had just stuck his feet out the door and hunkered down to stand when he snapped a wide-eyed gaze back to Natalie whose gaze was still focused on the tablet. “But…..I know I have more than that. Right…..?”

Natalie looked up, raised a single eyebrow, and quite clearly said so he couldn’t miss what she was doing, “Not if I don’t see it. And I don’t. Schedule must have failed to load.”

He wasn’t prepared so he knew Natalie’s squawk of surprise and the thud of the tablet dropping were completely his fault when he lunged behind him and scrambled to throw his arms around the woman. She was clearly flustered, he could feel it, and he squeezed her tighter. His heart hurt at the fondness he felt for both her and Gorilla, both who did their best for him and made the Agreste mansion feel just a bit warmer than his Father ever made it feel. 

At one point, Natalie must have freed an arm because she gave his blonde head one pat, then two, and, to his great amusement, ran lean fingers once through his hair before she managed to utter, “One of you Agreste’s will be the death of me.”

He pulled back, smile bright and wide. “Not me! I love you, Nat!”

It had slipped out and he hadn’t meant to say it but the complete surprise over her entire body made him unable to regret it. Her shoulders visibly dropped, mouth parting in surprise as her eyes widened to the size of saucer plates. Her usual straight-backed, proper posture disintegrated and the woman actually slumped for the first time since he had known her. Even her glasses tilted slightly askance. She looked pale though, like she hadn’t quite been prepared for that. 

He hadn’t either but he knew he meant it. So, with a softer smile, he told her again. In a way that wouldn’t backfire her brain cells. “You’re great Natalie. I mean, I know Dad doesn’t think I notice and you probably don’t either but….” He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, on his knees in the back of the car. He gave her a sheepish smile. “I notice how you look at him and how he, uh, doesn’t hate you? So, you’re important to him, too. And I didn’t think anyone could ever replace my Mom.”

Suddenly, the good mood dropped a bit but he refused to lose Natalie’s quickly misting over blue eyes and he didn’t miss the way she bit her lip. “And no one can. She was….My Mom, you know. But,” He shrugged and smiled gently at the flabbergasted, quickly-turning emotional caretaker. “But you make me feel warm like she did. And happy. Sometimes. When Dad isn’t ordering you to ruin my life.”

She cracked a small smile and he grinned. He felt the words in his heart and tried to pour them out to her. He turned from her and began to make his way out of the car. When he was steady on his feet, gray messenger bag slung over one shoulder, he leaned down so Natalie could still see him. 

“Even if my Mom comes back, one day…..” Adrien looked down, unable to say this part without blushing fiercely as he wiggled his feet in his shoes. “It wouldn’t mean I stop loving you or Gorilla. Or even Dad. If Mom came back, well, I’d just have more people to love, together.”

He looked up long enough to give her a blushing, shy smile before he stood and spun on his heels, instantly heading up the steps in front of him towards the double doors of the Agreste mansion. The Eiffel Tower stood tall and proud behind the mansion and Adrien basked in the Tower’s presence, a happy spot for patrol for Cat Noir and his Lady. He breathed out when he heard the other car door slam signifying Natalie had movement and the rolling of the tires as Gorilla moved the car around the mansion and to the garage on the side.

Natalie’s heels clicked on the stone as Adrien threw open door, stepping inside the dreary interior. He felt the warmth seep from his body and into the walls as his shoulders drooped. He was exhausted of this cold, emotionless house. He hated coming home to black and white and gray. And he _really_ hated that large, hanging portrait above the staircase of his Dad and him, their sorrow and pain etched frozenly into the painting. He didn’t notice he had tensed until he felt Natalie’s small hand awkwardly pat his shoulder.

“I…..It’s been a year, now, and it’s-it’s still odd for me too.” Her hand was small but firm and when she moved, she pressed him forward until they were walking across the foyer together and towards the stairs. Natalie didn’t speak until they stood before painting where Adrien dropped his gaze to his feet, not able to look much more at the painting without wanting to cry. “Adrien…..I don’t want to replace your Mom. To you or….Gabriel.”

The hand on his shoulder squeezed, firmly, before Natalie pulled him to her side. Her hand moved to wrap around his shoulder in a one armed hug. The first thing Adrien felt was warm and the smell of fresh linen, paper, and cinnamon. He smiled, looking up from dark lashes at the painting, before he had an idea. “I think we should move this painting out.”

Natalie hummed and he nodded, leaning his head against her. “Maybe….We could have one of….All of us.”

He knew what he was suggesting and he also knew he was going to have to literally fight his Dad to the death to do it. But he was willing. “Nat, I like this affectionate side of you.” He nudged her with his head and she heaved out a sigh at his antics but he could hear the smile. “But I’ve got a lot on my mind. Is it okay if I go to my room and lie down a while?”

“A lot on your mind about a pretty girl named Marinette?”

Natalie – 1. Adrien – 0. He flushed and looked back down at his feet, shoving away from her but her amused gaze followed him. “I liked you better before.”

She let out that quiet, tinkling laugh he liked and he looked over his shoulder as he climbed the right staircase to his room. “I’m gonna lie down. Natalie?”

She raised an eyebrow and his heart stuttered at the look she was giving him. Warmth. It suddenly burst into life and he could almost feel like maybe, just maybe, this empty, cold mansion could be a home once again. He smiled. “Thanks.”

He climbed up the stairs before she could reply, throwing open the door to his room and sliding inside. As soon as the door clicked shut, he leaned against it with a flushed grin. Plagg, always huddled either in his school bag or in an inside pocket of his white blazer jacket, darted from the jacket to float above his Chosen. He had his arms crossed, tail swishing curtly behind him. His slit eyes were narrowed on Adrien. 

“What am I? Chopped liver, kid?” The little sprite snorted, darting away with his tail flicking behind him and leaving a confused Adrien against the door. 

He flew to the small table with the blue globe next to Adrien’s bedside before he phased through the cabinet door, unlocking it from the inside. Once thrown open, Plagg hurled a couple of slices of Camembert onto the table’s surface. His ears flicked down to his head as he gobbled one slice of Camembert before nibbling at the other, mumbling beneath his breath. Adrien blinked in slow confusion, not understanding a single thing of what Plagg meant. Slowly, so as not to startle his kwami, he moved away from the door to get closer. Calling on his cat-like powers of stealth, he crept closer, trying to hear what Plagg was mumbling. 

He thought he was doing good until Plagg heaved a heavy sigh and addressed the creeping teenager. “I _know_ you’re there. Stop sneaking! You’re horrible at it.”

Adrien pouted. “I am not. I’m a cat, aren’t I?”

“Kid, _I’m_ the cat. You’re,” Plagg gave him a once over before turning away as if Adrien were a fly on the wall, confusing the boy even more with his actions. “Just a teenage boy running around in leather cat suit. With a bell. A bell, for Cat’s sake!”

Adrien couldn’t stop the quick laugh at the image of Plagg wearing a collar with a bell and as if sensing his thoughts, Plagg turned around quickly to give his Chosen a narrowed, intense glare. “I don’t know what you’re thinking but it’s a no.”

Remembering Plagg’s words and actions, he watched the little black cat God swallow the other Camembert slice whole. His ears were tight against his head, tail still swishing in agitation. He had a glare etched into his face and Adrien tried to think of what had caused this reaction but was coming up blank. Plagg had been upset about something before Adrien entered the room so it was something before that. He leaned his hips against his white sofa and crossed his arms, focusing his attention on his kwami in concentration as he tried to think of an answer. 

He hated to see Plagg upset. Despite the grumbling, lazy, sarcastic cat he had been partnered with he couldn’t – didn’t – want to work with anyone else besides Plagg. It wasn’t until that single moment sitting atop a flooded Paris, about to remove his ring because nobody cared about him – everyone always _left_ him – when he saw what he had seen in Plagg all along: a big, soft heart. No one else could see it but Adrien knew it. The kwami pretended not to care and Adrien recognized this as a defence mechanism against the hurt and pain he must have suffered. He knew because…..The first few weeks after his Mom had gone, after his Dad became a cold monster, and after he had suffered screaming fights with the man he had thought loved him…..Well, he kind of gave up too. 

Adrien had, admittedly, given up on caring: about himself, gaining the only affection of the parent he had left, crying at night about his Mother leaving – she left him, alone, and she didn’t bother coming back –, he gave up and gave in to the fact that _no one_ could ever need him. No one wanted to be near him and there must have been something wrong with him. His Dad hated him, his Mom left, he had no friends besides Chloe who also had her own agenda, he had no clue how to socialise properly, he knew he was awkward and frazzled sometimes. But him? He had learned to adapt. He had given in and been moulded to fit his Dad’s view of who he should be.

But Plagg? Adrien’s eyes softened on the still grumbling kwami who was now etching angry scribbles into the surface of the small table with a black paw. Plagg had chosen to remain shut off, cold. He didn’t want to be hurt, and if no one ever got close enough to hurt him, he would never have to be hurt again. Adrien understood because he had tried to distance himself. But Adrien knew he was a measly 15 years old compared to the infinite lifespan Plagg would live. The God was well over 8000 – something Adrien usually liked to tease him about and jokingly call him an ‘old kitten’ – and there was a lot of pain, a lot of hurt, in a life that long. 

Adrien understood Plagg and perhaps that was why they were Chosen to be paired together: they understood _each other_. And then it clicked in his head. He chuckled at the way Plagg showed his heart in the smallest of things. A gentle smile stretched his lips as he made his way toward the tail swishing cat. Within reaching distance, he shot out two hands, cupping the confused squeaking kwami. He brought Plagg up to face level, leaving him in one hand as he brought up the other to stroke two fingers from the cat’s forehead, over the single antenna atop his head, and down his back. 

A rumbling, deep purr shot through Plagg as his glowing, slit green eyes widened and shot up to Adrien’s. Adrien smiled down at him, still petting the now utterly slouched and confused God. His tail hung limply over Adrien’s cupped hand. 

“You’re important to me too, Plagg.”

He leaned down to give the cat a small kiss on the forehead and it was as if Adrien had burned him. He shot up, darting this way and that, stuttering and trying to form a sentence around his deeply bright red cheeks. His ears were flat but the tips were vibrating and his tail was shooting right to left in a clearly confused manner. Seeing his kwami not knowing how to deal with the emotions, Adrien snorted out a laugh before he turned away and headed towards his bed. The sunlight was falling right onto it and call him a cat if you will but he really wanted to sleep in that stretch of light from the wall of windows. 

He let out a loud, long yawn before flopping face first into a pillow and onto his stomach. He threw both arms up, underneath the pillow, tilting his head to the side and blinking sleepy with half mast green eyes. He could feel his vision getting blurry as cognitive thoughts began to flee but he sleepily murmured, “Come sleep, kitty.”

He almost thought he had broken Plagg or maybe misread the kwami’s irritation but just as his thoughts began to head back into wakefulness, he felt Plagg settle in the crook of his folded arm, nuzzling his nose against Adrien’s. Two sleepy, glowing green eyes stared before Plagg closed his, bumping his nose against Adrien’s once more, and the two fell asleep to the heat of the Sun and the deep, gentle lull of Plagg’s purr. 

When he woke the sun had completely set below Paris’ horizon and the moon had risen. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, loosely stretching to shake the sleep off his bones, Adrien woke from his slumber to see one of probably the rarest – and cutest – things he would ever see. Little Plagg was sleeping like a miniature kitten. His little paws were lying stretched out, pressing against the top of Adrien’s lips – and the culprit behind the weird tingling in them when he realized that Plagg was freaking _kneading_ his upper lip. He smiled loosely as he moved a small fraction backwards to stop the weird tingling in his lips as he gazed affectionately at the sleeping black cat. His hind legs were curled close to his body and before Adrien had moved, Plagg’s nose had still been nestled against his own. 

Sometime during sleep, the purr had faded to a near silent rumble but what really made it rare was the happy, wide smile on his sleeping kwami’s face. The smile stretched Plagg’s lips, little paws still kneading the air where Adrien had been. His face scrunched up as he tried not to react to the rare, vulnerable side Plagg was showing him. Or the way it made him feel like he was special to Plagg. The words from that day rang through his ears as he looked at Plagg’s little chest breathing softly and deeply: _“I’m sure that if there was another Cat Noir, he would give me cheese…..But he wouldn’t be you.”_

He chuckled inwardly and finally decided to try and get up without waking the sleeping cat. He rolled quietly and slowly to his side before sitting up, settling his bare feet against the cold of his floor. He hissed at the cold on his feet, tapping them to get them to warm up and get used to the temperature. Yawning so wide that his jaw popped, he lifted a hand to habitually straighten his ruffled hair from sleep. Being a model was hard, mostly because he had annoying habits like constantly trying to make sure his appearance was _perfect_. 

He had just stood to his feet and stretched his arms above his head, wincing when his back cracked softly, when a strange feeling welled inside his gut. He was suddenly wide awake, an anxious apprehension curling coldly into his body. Ice flowed through his veins and Adrien looked quickly around his room, wondering if an akuma had snuck in during his deep cat-nap. He found nothing, saw nothing lingering in the shadows of his room. Even without his transformation, he had decent eyesight in the dark so he could make out the shapes of his room with minimal effort. Moving both lithely and quietly, he moulded himself to the darkness, searching for any reason for the cold ball in his gut that something just wasn’t _right_. 

He had made it back around to his desk after perusing his room. Finding nothing, he ended up where his three screens surrounded a white rolling chair. His bare feet felt the thin placement mat he had there and he could just see the bright red designs glaring up in the dark. Slowly, he reached out a hand to tap the white mouse. Light from his three computer screens flooded his section of the room as his narrowed eyes took in the room again. Nothing remained out of place but the feeling inside him was growing stronger, he could feel it gnawing at him, a desire to find what was wrong and just fix it. Somewhere, he was needed. 

Well, looks like he was going to have to wake up Plagg to figure it out. He heaved a small sigh as his eyes flickered to the still curled and sleeping form of his kwami. The softly breathing creature was a bit more restless, paws twitching as if he felt the gnawing cold inside Adrien too. He reached for a small square device on his computer desk at the corner and slowly slid up the notch of the button. It lifted and as soon as it lifted only a little bit, small dim lights lit up Adrien’s room. He pushed a smaller, round button at the top and the sunroof etched into his ceiling sealed up until it looked like a normal ceiling to any one else.

The room was nice but dimly light and he set the controller down before making his way towards Plagg. He never made it. Three things happened that sent his heart careening inside his chest. Plagg suddenly sprouted to life, eyes snapping open with a wide panic Adrien had never seen. The little kwami shot into the air, darting frantic eyes around the room as if looking for something direly important. The next thing that happened rather simultaneously was a small, red form flying through his cracked open window and falling to his floor with a thud. The last thing to give him a heart attack was the residual energy still surrounding – but fading – from the small red form: it was in familiar red, black, and white. Almost like a mist or steam, it rolled off the kwami’s body like smoke and into the air. 

It didn’t take Adrien long to piece together what was happening: that was a kwami. A kwami with familiar colours. A kwami who was on his floor, not moving, and definitely belonged to his partner. Who was definitely _not_ with her. All he managed to do was straighten before Plagg hurled himself – a black blur so quick, Adrien almost missed the movement – to the fallen red bug, his voice frantic as he called her name, “Tikki!! Tik! Hey, Tik, come on, answer me!”

Adrien didn’t waste time and hurried over, falling to his knees beside Plagg huddled next to his white couch. He looked over the red kwami with the magick slowly fading out of her body. As it fled, the red of her small form began to fade to a washed-out red, almost gray, of it’s previous colour. This sent Plagg into another round of panic and Adrien’s throat closed up at the fear in the black cat’s tone. “No, Tikki!! Hey, I need you to listen, come on, hear me. Come back Tik, come on, it’s okay.” His little voice broke and so did Adrien’s heart as he watched, helpless. “I’m here.”

Plagg’s voice and his words seemed to halt the colour fade of Tikki’s body and it wasn’t long before one of her drooped antenna gave a small twitch. Plagg’s eyes brightened and a tremulous smile broke over the cat’s lips. “I’m here, Tik. Right here.”

Plagg tried to lift her but he was shaking so his hold was trembling and he was struggling to lift Tikki into his arms. Feeling finally like he could do something, Adrien scooped both kwami into his hands. Plagg settled against Adrien’s cupped hand, leaning against his thumb as he pulled Tikki into his black form. He curled his nose against the top of her head, squeezing his eyes shut as he held her with both paws to his chest. She was limp and at first Adrien thought the worst. He thought she was dead. Until he saw the small sight of her red colour inching back up from her small feet, climbing up her body in a slow wave. 

Adrien nudged Plagg with his thumb, eyes flickering to Tikki’s body. The little kwami was upset and gave his Chosen a death glare that could have killed him on the spot – but when his own eyes snapped to where Adrien had gestured, his expression lit up. He looked down at Tikki and soothingly told her, “Thatta girl, Tik. Oh, you are gonna be death of me…..I’m gonna need three hundred wheels of Camembert to recover!”

Sadly, Adrien did not doubt that. He smiled weakly and watched the colour rise through Tikki’s tail and her stomach, climbing up her back and chest before he asked, “What…..Could have caused this? Is she….?”

Plagg’s curt tone showed he did not like answering questions when he was holding Tikki and though his eyes never left the colour rising through Tikki, Adrien could feel Plagg’s tail wrap around his thumb in a slight apology. “She did something stupid, something we kwami are not supposed to do. We aren’t supposed to really be _able_ to. She broke the Miraculous. I don’t know how or why and only she can tell us that. It better be a damn good reason, too.”

Adrien watched the colour rise through her cheeks, darkening the black dots and lighting up her face in red. “You can break the Miraculous?”

Plagg was hesitant but he gave a jerky nod. “Yeah but, kid, she shouldn’t have. Because-Because it usually kills us. Or leaves us completely drained and we have to sleep for thousands of years. Tik…..Tik may not even wake up. But whatever she broke her Miraculous for, trust me kid, it isn’t good. Tik is a stickler for the rules and stuff. She had a very good reason.”

Adrien hesitated, noticing how Plagg had dismissed his last question. Had he been wrong or had Plagg just not answered? He decided it was worth another shot. “She’s…..Ladybug’s kwami. Isn’t she?”

Plagg looked up then just as the red completely filled in the last of Tikki’s antenna. His paws tightened around her when she didn’t move. “….Yeah. And that’s even worse. Cause she isn’t with her.”

Adrien felt the cold ball in his gut spread to his chest and he had to keep from shaking as he held Plagg and the unconscious Tikki in his hands. “What does that mean?”

Plagg flinched and looked back down at Tikki, mumbling, “It means either Tikki broke the Miraculous herself to save her…..Or she’s-she could be gone.”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “Gone?” A light dawned. “No, she wouldn’t have run away, Plagg. And definitely not from her responsibility. She isn’t like that. She….Isn’t my Mom.”

Plagg looked up at him with sympathy as he reiterated, strongly and firmly. “She could be _gone_ , kid.”

It hit him. Ladybug would never run away but if she didn’t run and her kwami was lying here motionless and limp then was it possible she was already –

Just when he felt himself unable to breathe, both Chosen and kwami snapped eyes down at Tikki when the red bug gave a violent shudder. As soon as their eyes were on her, hers snapped open. They were wide, a beautiful blue, and the pupils were completely blown, almost covering the blue of her iris. She blinked, drugged slow, but with each successive blink of her lids, her pupils began to shrink. When they were almost normal sized, she turned her gaze up at Plagg and their eyes met. 

Adrien blushed and looked away at the intimacy of their deep and intense stares. He looked back when Tikki suddenly shot up, wobbling in the air a few inches above his hands. “Plagg! Please!”

The desperation in her tone had not only Plagg flying up to grip her hands but Adrien rising to his feet, heart pounding in his chest at the urgency. “Tik, what’s wrong? Why did you break your Miraculous. You could have died!”

Plagg’s irritation and worry all seeped into his last words as his ears fell back and Tikki’s eyes softened only slightly. She lifted a single hand to his cheek as she spun to face Adrien’s wide eyes. “You have to save her, now! She needs you!”

He moved into action, heart pounding and chest constricting as he shot frantic eyes to Plagg. They shared a look of understanding before Plagg rolled his eyes upwards, tail twitching. “Let’s get this over with and save your girl.”

Adrien wished his smile reached his eyes at the endearment but all he could muster was a weak smile before he held up a hand, summoning the magick he felt in the silver ring. He clenched a fist as he called for his kwami: “Plagg, Claws Out!”

Green, black, and yellow magick flowed over and through his body. He closed his eyes, revelling in the feeling of the spandex-leather suit melting against his skin. His ears flicked atop his head and his belted tail swished to life behind him. He felt his cat vision tunnel into his eyes and as soon as the magick was coursing through his body, he opened luminous green eyes. They fell on Ladybug’s kwami who had tears perched in the corner of her eyes, a gentle frown on her face as she hovered shakily in the air. 

Adrien, now Cat Noir, slowly approached the wall of windows, hopping onto the open one on all fours, his clawed hands holding lithely onto the glass and metal frame. He looked back, his eyes steady and glowing with determination as he softly told Tikki, “I’ll find her. I’ll bring her home.”

His words caused her to slowly relax, her eyes showing her gratitude. Cat Noir turned back to look out over the night of Paris, the ice flowing through his body nearly numbing in it’s intensity. He went to launch himself into the night, anything to find his Lady, his Bug, hold her and never let her leave his sight again when Tikki suddenly surged forward. He looked over at her from his right, head cocking to the side. 

What she said nearly sent him toppling out the window but he couldn’t have prevented his heart from both stopping and exploding if he had tried. “Wait! You won’t find her without the suit! Please, you know her Adrien! Ladybug is….” Tikki paused and then shook her head rather harshly, as if ridding herself of what she was about to say before she ended his entire body’s functioning processes. “Ladybug is Marinette!”

He stared blankly at Tikki while his heart caught up with the information Tikki had sprouted to him. He swallowed and turned back to Paris as he hoarsely told her, “Uh, yeah, okay. Thanks. I’ll-I’ll find her. Cat’s honor.”

He gave her a crooked smile and Tikki nodded, relief flooding her features. He took a moment to breathe – breathe, Agreste, it’s not like the girl you’ve been crushing on behind you is also the hero you’ve been crushing on – before he launched himself out into the night, landing on all fours atop the cream wall surrounding Agreste mansion. He gave one last look back at the small red form floating in his window before he took off, darting through the night to find his missing Lady. 

Cat knew what Plagg said could be true. She could be…..Gone. The thought alone caused every part of his body to almost shut down and he had to force himself to keep running across the rooftops, looking frantically for any sign of her. He would find Marinette, his Ladybug, and when she was safe – he refused to believe she was _gone_ – they were going to have a very long talk. As he flew across Paris’ rooftops, the black cat hoped with everything in his body that she was okay. Because if she wasn’t? 

He wasn’t sure his heart could take it. Because without Marinette, without Ladybug, there was no Cat Noir.


	7. Predatory Saviours and Healing Cats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Marinette wanted to do was break free from her captor. A surprise visit may change everything. But is escaping him better than what awaits for her in the darkness of Paris' streets? Will her Cat come to save her? And if he does....Will he lose himself in the process?
> 
> Can Cat Noir heal a broken heart? Amid saving her and not losing himself to the darkness inside of him, deep conversations with Plagg, healing not just Marinette's mind but her heart, and selling his soul to his Father can Adrien survive the fall? Or will they both crash and burn?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MINOR VIOLENCE POSSIBLY MAJOR VIOLENCE BORDERLINE WARNING!!!!!  
> There is a bit of violence in the next scene (more or less a fight scene) so if you are not comfortable, then please skip past the part!
> 
> There is also a scene in this chapter where I am going to clarify: Adrien is a complete and utter sweetheart.He is a gentleman and though he has no idea how to care for a girl with assault issues, he is doing the best he can but he is also a teenage boy. He does NOTHING untoward to Marinette and respects her. That is all.

\-------MINOR VIOLENCE POSSIBLY MAJOR VIOLENCE BORDERLINE WARNING!!!!!-------

His grip on her wrists was tight and the brick of the alleyway was hard and cold against not only her skin but her body being pressed into it. Her shoulders and her arms were aching from being held up in the awkward position, her jaw and cheek throbbing from the smack that she was still reeling from. Her head felt like a thousand hammers smashing into it repeatedly, all at the same time, but what worried Marinette the most was the fact that her captor was currently digging in his pockets with one hand for something she didn’t want to know.

Whatever he pulled free wouldn’t be good for her. Dread crawled inside her and she felt bile bubble up to her throat. Swallowing it down, she wearily let her body sag. Closing her eyes and shoving back hot tears, she tried to summon the power to fight. She had struggled and fought so much but had gotten nowhere. She had bruises from his tight holds, her skull and jaw were definitely bruised, she was sure she had a concussion, and this boy didn’t seem like he was done with her yet. She knew what this would lead to and her heart strummed in fear.

Somehow, this moment was more terrifying than facing Hawkmoth. At first, she wasn’t sure what it was she was seeing in her mind’s eye. All she could make out was the black but as the shadowy form approached, colour seeped into it and bled it red. As the form took shape, Marinette tried to blink her eyes open to erase the image, expecting to see the alleyway and the face of her fate, but found she couldn’t summon the strength or ability to open her eyes. The figure stepped out of the darkness like she had been born from it and Marinette’s heart stopped.

It was _Ladybug_. Well, it would have been except….. _She_ was Ladybug. The figure stepped closer and Marinette blinked, eyebrows furrowing, at the familiarly expressive eyes that looked right into her. Those blue eyes and the small wistful smile made her eyes well with unshed tears as she tried to place this woman in her mind, the answer dancing away from her. 

The woman was short and small but beautiful. She was only up to Marinette’s chin but despite her size, her presence was overwhelming and demanding. It drew not only Marinette’s attention but the darkness in her mind behind her eyes. The shadows slithered around the woman’s ankles and Marinette wondered if, possibly, she was dead and this was a dream or Heaven or – 

The Ladybug woman giggled. “You aren’t dead, silly. This is….” The woman looked around with her head cocked to the side, bright red hair piled in a messy bun atop her head bobbing with the motion. “A pause in time. We don’t have long.”

Marinette was even more confused. Not dead just….Frozen in time? She didn’t try to formulate a response and instead gazed at the Ladybug before her, determined to place the odd look-alike to the turning in her gut. She _knew_ this woman. Her red hair was piled into the messy bun and her face was rather round, child-like, with large expressive blue eyes. She was thin like a small kid, her short stature making her appear much younger than her gaze spoke of. She was wearing a mid-length, bouffant dress.

It was one shouldered, leaving the woman’s right shoulder bare. The other shoulder hosted a single red strap that connected to the bodice of the dress. The bodice was tight and form fitting, accentuating her thin waist line. Right at her waist, the bouffant skirt swirled out in large poofs of lace, swirling ruffles, and bouncing flounces. Mesh stockings covered her legs to her knees and she was wearing simple flats. 

The most striking of the dress? It was Ladybug: red with black spots. The stockings were even red with black dots. The flats were red with a black bow at the lip and the womans smile grew wider at Marinette’s obvious confusion before she gave a little twirl, giggling when the skirt of her dress flittered around her. 

“Don’t recognize me?” Her smile softened before she slowly bounced toward the frozen Marinette stuck in her own mind. She leaned her head up, standing on her tip-toes, and lifted a small hand to Marinette’s bruised cheek. “Oh, Marinette.”

Marinette’s breath caught in her throat as reality slammed into her. That tone. Those words. That voice. Those _eyes_. The woman realized it too. She looked into Marinette’s eyes with a forlorn smile, gaze soft and weary and so…...So _sad_ that Marinette felt her heart break. 

Tikki shook her head, messy red hair flying in every direction as her own eyes glistened. “It’s not your fault Marinette. I’m sorry. I didn’t…..I should have known and helped you through this. Of course you felt that way.” Tikki’s voice wavered as her emotions broke through. Marinette felt hot tears finally falling from her eyes and Tikki’s thumb brushed away the ones falling down her bruised cheek. “We’re almost out of time. I don’t know if-if I’ll see you again. I’ve done something….Bad.” 

Marinette felt her eyes widening but still no words would come and Tikki shook her head gently. “I chose to do it. Don’t worry about me. Just, listen.” Tikki blinked quickly past the moisture in her own eyes, her voice breaking as she told Marinette the words she desperately needed to hear. “You are who you are. And you _are_ Ladybug. Without you, Ladybug ceases to exist. But…..You are also Marinette. And me?” 

Laughing through her tears, Tikki lifted her other hand to Marinette’s face and brought the girl’s nose down. She closed her eyes and placed a quick kiss on the edge of her nose just as she’d done to Marinette when she proclaimed she was proud of her. Tikki pulled back, eyes wide and glimmering, and whispered, “I love Marinette _and_ Ladybug. So what are you waiting for?” Tikki put a hand on her hip, gave Marinette a stern look, and used her free hand to shove the girl backwards. “Go back and _fight_!” 

Before the darkness swallowed Tikki’s form whole, all Marinette could see was the resigned yet hopeful smile before her eyes were blanketed in a darkness so thick that she could see nothing…..Until bluebell orbs snapped open. Wide, blue eyes looked straight into the sky blue pools of her captor who hadn’t budged an inch from the last time she saw him digging in his pockets. It was as if time resumed as soon as her eyes opened: his hands began rummaging through his pocket again as he gave a curse, failing to find what he was digging for. 

A coil that had been deep inside her, wound tighter and tighter, snapped. It burst free and spread through her like a colourful wildfire. Her gaze narrowed onto the boy before her and it was Ladybug that looked through Marinette’s eyes. 

“Let go.” 

She didn’t recognize the deep voice that had spoken as her own until her captor, who also hadn’t expected it, looked around in confusion before his gaze settled on her. He blinked rapidly at her before he resumed digging, this time in the other pocket, and Marinette’s emotions came to their climax. All the fear, terror, pain, and defeat washed through her in a quick burst as she took advantage of him holding her wrists with only one hand while being heavily distracted. She was Ladybug and she was not going to be beaten: by him _or_ Hawkmoth. 

Taking a quiet yet deep breath, Marinette relaxed her shoulders, sagging in his grip. Her weight pulled at the single hand holding her wrists. When she felt his hand twitching, struggling to hold her against the wall and her weight, she struck. Her movements were quick and sure as she flicked her wrists outwards. The motion caused his trembling hand to break off and she didn’t give him any time to react before both of her hands fell to his shoulders, thumbs digging into the tender skin by his collar bone and into the muscle of the shoulder, neck, and chest area. 

The boy gasped and she saw the glint of metal in one of his shaking hands and though fear slithered through her body, it was numb to the warring, fierce desire to get away. Using his shoulders, Marinette pressed downwards and lifted her knees to her stomach. She used the hard brick wall behind her, pressing back into it to keep herself from sliding downwards and to give herself force, and shoved the soles of her shoes into his chest. She stared at him and he at her before she used every bit of force she had to kick her right leg up into his face, the edge of her flats nicking the same cheek she had elbowed earlier.

Her thumbs dug into his shoulders kept him from pulling away as she pulled her left leg back into her stomach before sending it flying into his chest as she finally let him go. He stumbled back and sideways into the alleyway, coughing. Using her hands, she twisted them back against the brick and used the wall to vault forwards, darting out of the alleyway and into the walkway of Paris’ quiet, dark streets. Her body ached in places she hadn’t known existed, her ankle pulsed as she ran, her head felt foggy, but she refused to stop running. If only she could find Cat Noir, if only she could find her partner, if only…..

Her heart pounding inside her chest, Marinette ducked into another dark alley as soon as she heard the shout of a curse, knowing her captor was likely to get up and look for her. She panted quietly in the darkness of this small, square, dead end alley with her back pressed flat into the wall behind her. She was melded into the shadows with her chest heaving and a dangerously throbbing, hazy head. Sweat trickled in slow drips from the heat of the Spring night down her forehead and into the neckline of her shirt, her head tilted to the side and eyes focused on the opening of the alley. Her attention focused completely on the opening, she never saw the lithe figure garbed in darkness land silently behind her.

Not hearing footsteps approaching, she leaned over slightly to peek out. The streets were empty. Before she could leave, however, a strong grip grabbed her wrist and Marinette’s heart stuttered, dropping inside of her, as she spun quickly to face the figure still shrouded in shadows. Lifting her balled fists, she beat at the lean, muscled form of her attacker with her eyes squeezed shut and burning sobs welling in her throat. She couldn’t take any more…! Her blue orbs snapped open when a deep, grumbling growl reverberated off the alley’s walls.  


\---------------------------------------------------END WARNING!!!!!-------------------------------------------

She was met with glowing, green pools illuminated against the shadows of night and the darkness of the alley. Her body froze over in fear, terror choking her, as she gazed at her partner. The slits in his bright green eyes were barely visible as he stared right at her. Though fear swirled inside her it was not at the way he was looking at her but rather what the look in those eyes meant. There was a dark and dangerous gleam hidden in those eyes, like a cat that was stalking it’s prey: harsh and focused and deadly. The eyes of a predator.

That dark, predatory look sent her over the edge and Marinette’s heart constricted in a painful panic as she lunged towards Cat Noir’s form. Her arms wrapped tight and firmly around his chest, her hands finding purchase on his shoulder blades. She pressed her body as close as she could and she was never more thankful for Cat Noir than the moment his arms wrapped around her and pulled her closer into his spandex-leather clad body. In his arms and in the darkness of the alley with him guarding her, Marinette let herself fall apart.

She sagged in his hold, leaning all her weight against him as her body collapsed into his. He only tightened his arms around her and Marinette felt the weight of her terror and her fear crash into her, shattering her as she broke into heart-wrenching sobs. Fat, hot tears welled in her eyes and slid down her cheeks, falling from her jaw to the concrete of the alleyway. She felt Cat Noir tense, his body as tight as a taut string and that was when she could hear the pounding feet. At first, she hid against Cat’s chest in fear, thinking the captor was coming for her again but as she listened, her sobs and her tears uncontrollable, she realized he was running away. And her heart fell into her stomach when she heard from deep within her partner the throaty, growling yowl in the back of his throat.

She jerked back at the sound, his arms not budging so she had to strain to see his face. His entire posture was crouched a bit with his shoulders up to his chin. The leather cat ears atop his head were bent down so flat against his head she could barely make them out amongst his golden hair. He was focused on the sound of those footsteps and she felt the claws on each of his hands lengthen as the dread inside her burst into clarity: cats hunt their prey. It was like he couldn’t even see or feel her and Marinette’s eyes burned with tears at the fierce protectiveness.

She reached both her arms up in his tight hold to his face, her fingers grazing his hot skin gently. He was a bit sweaty – she fondly knew he had been looking for her and the sweat showed just how far and long he had gone for her – and she turned his face downwards. She wasn’t prepared and gasped, jumping in surprise. His slitted eyes were terrifyingly mesmerizing as they stared deeply into her own. It wasn’t Cat Noir that was looking at her but a dark beast stalking the night for prey. 

Her heart ached for the kind, compassionate partner – _her best friend_ – whose embrace was warm, comforting, and she missed those bright green eyes. All she saw now were steely, dark slits that caused her heart to drop to her stomach and a heavy lump to build in the back of her throat. His lips were thin, only sightly tilted downwards in a frown, and Marinette’s skin crawled at the predator crouched before her. She hadn’t realized her fingers had jerked back to her chest until she raised them to his face again. The tips of her fingers touched his cheeks and his slit eyes fell half-way closed as they burned into her own.

She could just make out his tail slowly, languidly, swishing behind him, the metal tip curling left and right. As soon as she touched him, he tilted his head only a fraction of an inch into her fingers as a small, quiet purr rumbled through the quiet alley. The vibration rumbled through her fingers and straight to her heart, the familiar sound causing tears to well in the corners of her eyes. She had barely made it out of this night alive, let alone with her innocence intact, and to see Cat Noir so-so-so much like a _beast_ that she couldn’t – wouldn’t – lose him, too.

Her mouth parted involuntarily as she whispered softly, “Chaton…..Please,” A single tear slid down her cheek as her voice broke at the emotion coursing through her. “Come back to me. Please.”

She broke. Her lower lip trembled as hot tears burned pathways down her cheeks, her vision blurring from the droplets of emotions that fell from her eyes. Her throbbing head caused spots to dance in her mind and she cried out when her knees buckled. Before she could hit the ground, still wrapped in Cat Noir’s arms, he jerked her further into an embrace. She flew forward with a squeak and a cry, her feet sitting atop his metal booted ones and her head on his shoulder. His golden strands tickled her face as he buried his head in the crook of her neck and her shoulder. His hold was tight but his touch was gentle, the tension of the darkness receding.

Marinette couldn’t hold back her tears. She cried even when her chest ached and her body completely sagged against the firm leather clad body. He was the only thing holding her up, the only thing grounding her to not only reality but to the fact that she was _safe_. At one point, even Cat Noir’s belted tail had wrapped securely around her, curled around Cat Noir’s legs and her own. The metal tip was perched against her lower back and for a moment, she wondered if her partner had turned to stone he was completely, rigidly still. 

From the recesses of her neck she heard the rumbling of his voice. Though his voice was muffled by her shirt and her shoulder, she heard him as if he had shouted at her due to the quiet surrounding them. “Princess, I-I’m so sorry.”

She let her eyes fall closed, raising a shaky hand to card through the locks at the base of his neck and at the back of his head, her fingers sliding through the strands like silky gold. Weary and tired, _numb_ , all she could reply with was, “Good kitty.”

His body shivered against her but Marinette couldn’t muster the strength to even open her eyes, head falling sideways onto his shoulder as a bone-deep weariness sank into her. Her entire body felt numb and weightless, her mind fuzzy, and when she opened her eyes she was relieved vaguely that her vision had cleared a little. The skin beneath her eyes was sore and tender from the crying and despite the numbness washing over her, every now and then, a tear would slip past her eyes. And she couldn’t be bothered to stop them. Just as she was about to trace the designs in Cat’s black shoulder pads for the fifth time since she opened her eyes – he had really nice shoulders – his body moved. 

With no effort and lightning speed, Cat Noir had scooped her into his arms like the Princess he always told her she was and had vaulted a mighty leap into the dark night above them. Her breath left her as her stomach flipped at the sudden change in altitude. Her heart felt weightless inside her chest and she jolted at the feeling. Her head was resting on Cat Noir’s collarbone, head tucked neatly against his jaw in a perfect fit. Her arms had already been wrapped around him but when he had adjusted his hold on her, her arms had wound around his neck unconsciously.

One of his arms was in the upper part of her back with his clawed hand falling right between the curve of her breast and her ribs. The other was bent with her legs draped over it with his hand holding her leg firmly. Paris was spread out below them and she would have been surprised to see the height Cat Noir had managed if she had been able to feel anything. But Marinette couldn’t muster anything. No emotion. No feeling. Nothing but the weightless, weary numbness that echoed inside her. As she looked over Paris, it’s streets seemed darker to her than they had before and nothing like the city she loved.

The tears came and this time she couldn’t stop the quiet, heart-wrenching sobs from breaking free of her exhausted body. Everything hit her at once and as Cat Noir’s body began it’s descent back to the streets that seemed more like a dark snake, everything faded to a dull gray inside of her as her vision became more foggy. 

Cat’s solid frame as he leaped and pounced through Paris was the only thing connecting her to any sort of life. Her brain went hazy as the night sky and Paris’ lights faded to a blur. Her eye sight blurred as she lost herself to her thoughts. She could feel the rush of the wind and her partner’s warmth through his suit, his strong arms holding her. She had been pressed against this chest, this body, many times before but she didn’t remember ever feeling so safe. But she knew, no matter what happened now, she was with Cat Noir. He wouldn’t let anything happen to her. She knew that but the tendrils of fear still coiling in her gut didn’t ease and the panic in her mind eat at her. She was still afraid but for more reasons than one. If the guy came back to hurt her, she wasn’t sure what she feared most: him actually coming back for her? …..Or remembering that deadly, predatory look in Cat Noir’s eyes.

As her consciousness faded to a dull throb, all she could remember was the dark, predatory look in the eyes of the boy who held her. And she wondered what she feared most: her captor or the look in the eyes of the person she trusted most in the world? She wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answer. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He hurled his body through Paris, the wind rushing against his leather clad body and the girl held tight in his arms. She was quiet, her cries having lessened, but he could still feel the tears soaking into his suit. He landed on a roof with a thud and darted lithely over the rooftops, his booted feet making no sound. It wasn’t until the first rain drop smacked into his nose that he felt the dredges of fear strike through his veins. He hated rain. Adrien Agreste wasn’t fond of it but Cat Noir? Cat Noir _hated_ it. 

He wiggled his nose when another cold drop hit the edge of it before he looked around for the sight of the Eiffel Tower. Against the dark sky he could see the tall Tower barely lit up. Spinning on his heels, he darted forward, bent slightly from his chest as he hurtled toward the safe haven. The feel of Marinette’s trembling form in his arms did nothing to lessen the panic slowly crawling through him. He wanted her to be safe, he didn’t want to be caught in the rain, and he most certainly didn’t want to be running away from the bastard who had dared harm her. 

He wanted to go back. He wanted to turn around and stalk the boy until he was begging for Cat to spare him. He wanted to play, tease him, let him think he was going to live and then –

He was startled into awareness by a high-pitched shriek as soon as a boom of thunder heralded the beginning of the storm approaching them. The sky was almost black, clouds quickly roiling over the stars. Cat Noir let out a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding, his eye sight, which had been going hazy at the corners, fading out. When his claws retracted – he hadn’t even known they could get longer! – he blinked in surprise down at the curved nails beneath his leather suit. That was a conversation for Plagg in the safety of his bedroom.

He looked up, twisting and turning, over and through the rooftops as he advanced agilely through the night. He pounced down to the ground, landing at the base of the cream walls surrounding the Agreste mansion. He balanced on his feet, his leg muscles burning from the stamina of running and jumping at a pace he had been unused to. He tilted his head all the way back, ears flat when he saw the pelting rain hitting the city in the quickly approaching sheets. He snapped his head back before darting green eyes up to the wall of windows, spotting the open one, and preparing to leap upwards. 

But a thought caused his slit eyes to dilate instantly. His heart beat picked up inside his body, sweat dotting his forehead. His tail swished behind him anxiously as he realized something very dire: he knew Marinette was Ladybug…..But Marinette didn’t know Cat Noir was Adrien. He felt his gut explode in a flurry as he tried to figure out what to do, how to settle this without her knowing because if she woke up in Adrien Agreste’s room after being saved by Cat Noir…..Sure, he could say Cat Noir dropped her off but that would involve implying he knew the hero that he, himself, actually was.

And Marinette wasn’t that stupid. If he scaled into the window, if he brought her up, it was the end of the lies. If Cat Noir saved her, it would be Adrien who picked up the pieces of the aftermath of this decision. He wasn’t just saving her: he was giving her the power to completely crush him, as Cat Noir _and_ Adrien. He felt his chest constrict and his tail drop to the concrete as his eyes dilated. He felt his mind haze over and breathing felt harder. His panic ridden eyes darted around for an answer and fell to Marinette’s face when she let out a whimper.

He closed his eyes and butted his nose against her head, purring and offering her whatever comfort she could get from him. He was willing to offer her whatever she needed. Something dark and deadly, a predatory instinct, whispered that all it would take was a single cataclysm…..Just as he felt he might give in to the dark whisper, her small voice carried through the rain swiftly approaching them. “Cat, I’m scared.”

The fear and fragility, the broken hoarseness in her voice, made his eyes well with tears as he pulled back and gazed down into the half-lidded, terrifyingly blank blue eyes of the girl he loved. His ears fell to his head and his tail dropped to the ground, curling at his feet. Just as the rain hit, all he could muster was, “Oh, Bug, I know. But I’m here.”

This did nothing for her blank expression and Cat felt his heart tighten at the look in her eyes. It was numb and empty, a girl that had been broken, and Cat felt acid bubble through his blood. He felt nauseous, trying hard not to cry and trying hard not to think about the fact that Marinette wasn’t gone, she was right here, right in his arms. But she felt so far away. He didn’t care when the heavy rain fell over them, hammering against the ground and their bodies like hail. It was cold and sharp, pelting heavily against them and soaking them in seconds.

But he couldn’t draw away from those eyes and Marinette didn’t look away either. Her gaze never wavered from the glazed expression he wanted to desperately erase but he knew his must be showing his nauseating fear that he had lost her. He stood there, holding the broken superhero in his arms, until his muscles ached. The rain soaked his hair and plastered it against his head and his neck, droplets dripping from the strands to fall to the ground. He wasn’t crying but the rain trailed down his cheeks in imitation of his pain, his mouth parted slightly and eyes grave.

The cold of the pouring rain soaked into his soul, drenching him in a heartache so intense he trembled from the depth of it. Her bluebell orbs were drowning him and he felt his throat close up, a lump forming tightly as, careful of his claws, he clenched his hands into her body. Her face was a horrible pale, a washed out colour compared to her usual rosy cheeked hue. Her freckles that dusted her nose and cheeks softly were vibrantly visible in against the stark whiteness of her visage. Beneath her eyes was an angry, swollen red from where her tears had literally burned her eyes as they fell. 

Her half-lidded eyes were bloodshot and he could see the tears still pooling in the corners of her eyes involuntarily. Her blue-black hair was limp against her forehead, soaked from sweat and rain. Her usual pig tails were missing and instead her hair was loose, hanging in a waterfall to a little past her shoulders. She was still wearing the clothes he remembered from that morning but they were crumpled, a tear in the side where he realized she must have snagged trying to escape. Her pants were intact but he sucked in a breath, feeling slowly bleeding out of him when he saw that her jeans hung low – too low! – on her hips.

He could just barely see the thin straps of her red and black spotted Ladybug themed underwear and his parted mouth snapped shut, jaw clicking as he grit his teeth. His tail swished in frustration behind him as he realized how close he had come to being _too late_. One second more and…..He blinked quickly past the heat in his eyes and his throat as his gaze narrowed onto his partner’s cheek and jaw, feeling useless and frustrated and drowning in self-loathing. The green, yellow, and purple bruise that marred a bit of her jaw and her cheek had his pupils shrinking to slits and a growl erupted from somewhere deep inside him.

Marinette blinked at the sound and for just a second, her eyebrows furrowed, Marinette looking out at him from two glassy blue pools. All it took was a single whisper and he was ready to knock the world around to give her whatever she asked of him, “….Cat….?”

The anger, the darkness, fled and he closed his eyes as a purr rumbled back through him. He brought her face closer to his own with the arm behind her back and lowered his until their noses touched. She was still out of it, her eyes hazy and foggy, but she giggled, a ghost of a smile twisting her lips as she whispered hoarsely, “Chaton.”

He rubbed his nose butterfly-light over the bruise marring her face, an intense urge to lick the wound running through his mind. He refrained – barely – and lifted back, shaking his head and flinging water droplets into the air. The rain still hammered against the ground and their bodies and when drops slid beneath his suit and down his back, he shivered, his ears flicking up and down in surprise. Marinette laughed and the sound caused his wide eyes to snap to her. One of his ears was frozen against his head, the other perked at the sound of her laughter. 

Her eyes were still dark and he could see she was running on emotion alone. Lifting a shaky hand, she gripped the leather ear perched upright atop his head and rubbed it between her index finger and her thumb. His eyes nearly rolled back at the pressure. A loud, vibrating purr resounded over the sound of the rain pelting the ground as he tilted his head into her hand. Her shaking fingers trailed down his ear and into his hair where she slowly ran fingers through it, shaking off the rain and leaving patches of fire over his scalp.

Her touch burned him and when her hand fell back to the back of his neck, he felt her fingers playing with the scraggly, rain-soaked hair at the back of his neck. He smiled softly, glad to see her behaving a bit more like the girl he knew. He knew Marinette would recover quicker than most girls: she had too big of a heart and she was Ladybug. Her heart demanded she forgive and forget – he would never forgive or forget, ever – and Ladybug dealt with a supervillain that wanted their Miraculous. He was sure she would rebound back, stronger and better, and he couldn’t wait to see the Ladybug that emerged from the broken shell of the girl the monster had left behind.

He leaned onto his haunches, preparing to launch to the open window where his dim lights still glowed. It was a hazy glow due to the heavy rain but his cat vision afforded him the sight to see the ledge of the metal frame where he could perch safely with Marinette in his grip. It was quite a leap straight from the ground to the metal window ledge but he just wanted to get Marinette out of the rain, safe and warm, and if he were being honest, he never wanted to let her go. She wasn’t safe without him. As soon as he thought it, he snorted inwardly. She didn’t need him to protect her. He looked down at the girl in his arms who had a trembling smile on her lips and his smile grew into a grin. 

She was strong. She didn’t need him and that made him love her more: her strength both with and without him. Together, they were unstoppable and invincible. But without him? She could still hold her own and give one hell of a fight. She had fought off someone trying to hurt her and escaped. Taking a deep breath, slit green eyes narrowed on the metal ledge, he pounced. He wasn’t sure if it was his desire to be strong like her or protect her even when he knew she didn’t need it but he soared to the ledge. His silver pawed boots landed lithely on the windowsill before he crouched, Marinette still held bridal style but also held up by his one bent knee.

She curled into him with a wince at the lights and he bent his chin to her cheek, avoiding touching the tender bruised flesh to protect her eyes. One of her hands at the back of his neck grabbed the metal tip of his tail and squeezed in gratitude. His tail twitched in her grip and Cat rolled his eyes at how just another part of his body bent to her will when the metal tipped belted tail wrapped around her wrist. Well, she had his heart why not his tail? He sunk his booted feet to the floor before he stood, feeling the aches in his muscles from being Cat Noir. 

The cat inside him was bristling at the cold, wet rain still clinging to his body inside and outside the suit. Heaving a sigh, knowing what he had to do, he looked down at the girl watching his tail with hazy blue eyes. He could feel her fingers tapping and twisting, playing with the belted tail attached to him before he nudged her head with his nose. That, he had intended. But he had not intended for the chirping trill that erupted from him. He felt his entire face flush as he stilled his motions. Marinette’s voice was shaky and he couldn’t tell if it was from laughing at him or the pain she was probably still numbly feeling due to the shock. “Was that…..You?”

He coughed as he looked at the far wall where he had some arcade systems sitting against the wall, his table football was pulled out just a bit away from the machines and he kept his gaze focused on that. “Uh, yeah. It’s...Comforting. I think.”

She was silent and then, quietly, “Thank you.”

Cat Noir felt his heart break for her, for what had happened to her, and once again guilt flooded him. Guilt and anger. Anger at the bastard who had done this, anger at himself for failing to save her in time. Guilt for not knowing Marinette was the beautiful, strong warrior he fought with everyday. Guilt for allowing that horrible bruise to take shape on her. She was too beautiful for it and she had not deserved what happened to her. 

He didn’t realize he must have sprouted every single of one of those statements off to her until her eyes were looking up at him, clarity returning slowly to them and making them sparkle a deep blue. “Chaton, you saved me. You saved me….”

Her voice broke on the last word as tears filled her eyes, crystalline and hanging at the edges of long lashes, and Cat Noir had seen enough of her tears. Wanting time to reign in his thoughts and his feelings washing through him, Cat Noir slowly set her on wobbly legs. She leaned heavily against him and her hands were still tucked behind his neck with no intention of letting go. He looked down and inhaled sharply. They were close, almost nose to nose, her numb eyes staring into his glowing green. 

Then, he remembered what she was here for. She was in shock and numb at the moment but what he most certainly did _not_ want her remembering was that he took advantage of her in any way. Slowly, using his baton, he stuck the end against her chest and pressed it firmly into her. She stumbled back, not enough to fall, but far enough away he could no longer smell Danish and sugar or feel the warmth of her skin. He gave her a forlorn smile, his eyes bright and shinning. She was looking at him in confusion, blinking slowly. Her brain was still in shock so things weren’t registering as quickly as they usually would have and he was sure most of this wouldn’t truly hit her until tomorrow morning. 

That’s why it was the perfect time to show her that Cat Noir wasn’t the only one who loved her. He meant what he said that day when they had first met, Cat and Bug: he loved her. Mask or not. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, feeling the dark magick of Cat Noir swirl away into his ring when he mumbled, “Claws In.”

There was a bright green flash around him, the magick swirling and coalescing into the black ring and turning it silver. A small ball of green, yellow, and black sparked into the form of Plagg who materialized with a blast of magick. When he opened his eyes, he didn’t realize how tense he was until he was able to relax under Marinette’s blank scrutiny. She was expressionless, eyeing him slowly with a small cock of her head. He could see a vague recognition but it hadn’t dawned yet. When it did…..Well, it would either make them or break them. He was willing to take the chance.

He gave her a small, gentle smile as he calmly told her, watching Plagg dart off from the corner of his eye. “Hey, Marinette, why don’t you take a shower, okay? I’ll be right here. I promise. Cat’s honor.”

He crossed his heart and she nodded, smile faded and eyes blank. The sparkle was gone and he heaved an inward sigh. This was going to be a long night, and he felt she wasn’t going to get much sleep either. And no way was he taking her back to her parents’ Bakery. Knowing Marinette as well as he did, he knew she didn’t want to worry them but…..Shouldn’t they at least know she was safe? He narrowed his eyes as he took a second to think before he held out a hand, cautious and slow, watching her for any negative reactions.

When his hand lifted, her eyes fell to it but she didn’t tense or burst into tears so he took it as a bonus as he calmly asked her, “Your phone. I need your phone. I’ll text your parents, okay? You know, Tom and Sabine?”

She reached for her phone which was poking out of her right pocket but when she tried to pull it free, it fell from her grip. Her eyes watched it fall, making no movement to catch it and Adrien yelled. He was about to fling himself forward but a black blur darted forward and caught it in tiny paws. Plagg groaned as he floated haphazardly, due to the weight of the phone, to his Chosen where he dropped the electronic device into his open hand. The kwami panted and grumbled under his breath before he darted off, Adrien not quick enough to catch where he was going. 

He turned his attention to Marinette’s phone and immediately groaned at the picture of her screensaver. Him, Marinette, and Luka dancing in Clara’s music video. He shook his head as he easily broke into her phone – she had one of those really simple phones that he loved – and pulled up the text between her and her Dad. He hadn’t meant to but his eyes fell to the chat and he felt his fingers curl into the phone, wanting to crush the device in his hands. 

_Me: Dad! Jules is literally just a friend! We’re going on ONE date. I didn’t need to hear the talk!_

_Dad <3: Okay okay, you’re a grown girl now! I want you to be safe. All the safes. All of them. _

_Me: DAD!!!!_

_Me: Hey Dad, I know it’s getting late, but we had a good time. Sort of. I had a lot on my mind but I’m heading home now. I won’t be home later than 1! I love you. Kiss Mom goodnight for me._

_Dad <3: Okay sweetie. Your Mom and I love you. Come home safe. I left some cookies in your room! ;)_

Just when Adrien felt he would explode, a crash of thunder and a bright flash of lightning flew into the room. His heart racing from anger and adrenaline, he spun towards the window and slammed it shut, the sound echoing through his too large room. He panted as he braced both hands against the glass, his teeth tightly grinding as he told Plagg, “Take her to the shower Plagg.”

Her phone was pressed against the glass in one of his hands and his shoulders ached with how tight his body was wound. Jules. Jules was the last one with her. They had…...They had went on a date. And Jules was the last one with her. If she never made it home, then…...Then Jules was the one he was after. Jules hit Marinette and Jules was the one who deserved his ire. Come tomorrow, come school, and he was going to make sure that boy tasted his fist. 

Anger coursed through him, hot and burning, as he remembered the complete and utter ass he had been. A bee! A freaking bee! Marinette wasn’t even allergic to bees and that was all he could think of as an excuse. When he had walked out of M Damocles office to see Alya and Nino standing on the metal steps leading down, he had been overjoyed. They had waited for him! Grinning so wide he was sure his cheeks were going to split, he noticed their attention on something below the steps and in the courtyard. He moved past them, hopping down a few steps before his eyes were met with the sight of Jules raising Marinette’s hand to his lips. 

And something inside him had churned at the sight. Sick and disgusted, anger festering in his gut, he had shot forward, grabbed her arms, and jerked her away. The poor girl had stumbled right into his chest but his eyes were narrowed onto Jules. His only excuse….Was a bee. And he could still remember the hurt in Marinette’s blue eyes when he had turned away. He had just been so angry! All he’d wanted to do was just-just-just kiss her in front of everyone and hiss. Yes, he wasn’t afraid to admit it: he had wanted to arch his back and _hiss_. 

He didn’t know when his breathing had become so ragged he had left breath marks on the window or when he had closed his eyes until Plagg’s voice, distantly in the room somewhere, shot them open. “She’s in the shower.”

It was blunt and curt but Adrien wasn’t an idiot. There was no ‘kid’, no mocking sarcasm. No _Camembert_. He stood to his feet, pulling away from the window with Marinette’s phone still clutched in his left hand. He looked down at it before shoving it in his pocket with his phone and turning around. The lighting was a bit sharp for him at the moment so he walked to his desk. Picking up the remote he slid the notch down only a fraction and the lights dimmed a bit more. It was comfortable and relaxed and Adrien felt his muscles finally relax. 

He rubbed his right shoulder when it ached a bit at the tension he had been carrying most of the night and the day before he looked around for his kwami. He almost missed the black cat if it wasn’t for those glowing slit eyes. Adrien made his way toward Plagg’s form huddled in the far left corner of his bed. A pillow had been shoved up to the corner to make a make-shift bed and the white sheet beneath his blue duvet was pulled up and curled around the breathing form wrapped inside. Adrien sat at the edge of the bed, knowing what was happening when his gut clenched.

“How’s Tikki? Is she okay?”

Plagg didn’t answer right away, his eyes remaining on her, paw holding one of her hands soothingly. His big ears were drooped and his tail was curled around his legs as he sat on Adrien’s bed. “I don’t know. She woke up earlier, when we left to find Marinette, and she seemed fine. But now….” His free paw gestured loosely at her softly breathing form. “She’s like this.”

Adrien peeked at the red kwami to see sweat dotting her forehead, mouth parted, and he could see the struggle she was having, the fight she was trying to win for her life. His heart fell to the floor as he looked at Plagg. “I’m sorry your girl is injured.”

Green eyes rose to meet his and Adrien was a bit taken aback by the sharp look in them. “Tikki is more than just a girl. She’s….She’s everything to me. My other half, my best friend. From my Destruction, from my horrible stupid paws, she creates beautiful things. She’s more than injured, Adrien.” Plagg’s eyes fell back to Tikki and his tail brushed up to wipe some sweat from the kwami’s forehead. “She could be _dying_.”

Adrien swallowed past the lump in his throat. Hesitantly, he brushed a finger over the tip of Plagg’s head before he mumbled, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I know, I know she’s important to you. And I’ll do everything I can to help her, Plagg. Cat’s honor.” He swiped a hand across his heart and smiled in relief at the familiar grin tugging at Plagg’s lips at the pun. “I promise, I’ll make sure they are _both_ okay.”

Before he could pull his finger away, Plagg’s tail lifted and wrapped around, giving Adrien’s finger a tight squeeze. “I believe you, kid. Because….” The black cat kwami fidgeted before he lifted his head heavenward with a roll of his eyes so wide, Adrien thought they might roll around his entire head before the cat hissed as if it pained him, “Because it’s you and I trust _you_!”

Adrien felt his heart thump inside his chest as a warmth flew through his body. He wrapped his finger tight around Plagg’s tail, letting his hand fall gently to the bed. “You’re my best friend, Plagg, and I trust you too.”

Having had enough heartfelt emotions for one night, Plagg grumbled, “Now, don’t make me regret it.”

Adrien chuckled, grinning to himself and imagining just how many ways he could make Plagg regret showing his heart to him, before he heard the three sharp knocks on his door that caused his blood to freeze in his veins. There was only one person who knocked in precision like that and his panicked eyes flew to Plagg’s. They had a silent conversation of how this was not good before Adrien popped up and stumbled to his bedroom door, wincing when he banged his foot on his bed-frame. 

The sound caused Natalie’s voice to ask, “Adrien? Are you alright?”

Voice hoarse from the emotions he had been battling with and the now stupidly painful throbbing in his foot seeped through into his voice just as he reached his door with the yellow caution sign. “Yeah. Coming. I’ll be right out.”

When he reached for the door, the sleeves of his white button up jacket alerted him he was suspiciously dressed for a teenager who had been left in his room and was supposed to be sleeping at almost 2am in the morning. He hesitated only a second, warring with the model inside himself, before he mussed up his rain soaked hair, tore off his jacket and tossed it by the foot of his bed, and kicked off his shoes by his bedroom door. He grabbed the hem of his black t-shirt and tore it over his head, flinging it somewhere in the dark room he would worry about later. 

His chest still had some water droplets running down but he figured he could play it off as a shower. He wiggled his hips slightly to allow his jeans to hang from them before he took a deep breath, opened the door enough to squeeze through, and faced Natalie. He closed his door completely and the staircase, the foyer itself, was all too dark and quiet. His heart pounded in his chest as he remembered all the lonely nights since his Mom’s disappearance wandering the foyer or the dining room where her picture still stood, smile frozen. 

All too often this mansion was too cold, too big, and it had often threatened to swallow Adrien whole. It was definitely colder in the foyer than in his room and he had to raise both his hands to his arms, rubbing them to try and keep them warm. His breath ghosted into the halls as he looked around, studiously avoiding Natalie’s gaze. 

Natalie Sancoeur was sharp, smart, and she had wit. She was also, Adrien had noticed, seen as beautiful to his Dad – he thought so too, of course, but not in the way his Dad did. He wondered, in passing, if that was why his Mom had left. 

“You’ll have to look at me at some point.” There was a vague sort of emotionless humor in her voice and Adrien winced, knowing she was right. “I’ve got all night, Adrien.”

He did not doubt for one second that Natalie would stand there and wait, even if he fled into his room. She would be there in the morning just as he’d left her and when his eyes did find their way to her, his eyes widened. He had seen Natalie worried, he had seen her angry, and on a rare occasion, he got to see her truly happy. But he had never seen her look so….Not Natalie. She was all business, all the time, so seeing her in her blueish-purple, black hemmed silk pajamas threw his mind completely off.

Her hair was loose, dangling to just below her shoulders. Her red tipped bangs were parted to either side of her face and tucked behind her ears. Her glasses were on but slightly askew and as he gazed at her, he realized she had come here in a hurry, straight out of bed. For him. She must have heard something and small, little Natalie was here to save him. The thought caused him to snort to push back a chuckle at the hilarity of the scene and Natalie, realizing her situation, sighed with pink dusting her cheeks.

“Your safety isn’t funny, Adrien.” He grinned when her voice came out as a grumble, the business woman reduced to this normal woman. 

“So, Nat…...Nice pajamas.”

She gave him a glare and even without the business suit, he felt the reprimanding waves rolling off of her. He laughed quietly before he shook his head. “No, they look good on you. Dad bought them, didn’t he?”

Natalie tensed and it was all the answer he needed. He could see, behind her glasses, the fight she was warring as she looked at him and he shook his head again, this time for firmly. “It’s okay, really. You don’t have to dance around it, Natalie. Mom is…...Mom’s gone.”

Natalie fidgeted, the gesture so unusual Adrien found his eyebrows shooting up in surprise. “Your Father…..Gabriel and I aren’t-” She sighed and the next time she spoke, her voice was stronger. “Your Father and I are not together, Adrien. He loves your Mother. He always will.” She looked into his eyes and he saw the gentle way her aqua gaze searched him for any sign for injury. It made him feel warm that someone in this house still gave a damn. “But I’m not just here for Gabriel.”

She didn’t say she was here for him but he heard it loud and clear in the air around them, surrounding him in a warm bubble. He opened his mouth to speak when he saw she was carrying something that he thought looked familiar. He cocked his head to the side in confusion, trying to place the beautiful green, blue, and silver pajama set Natalie was carrying. It was definitely small and definitely for a female and the thought confused him further until, with dread curling in his stomach, he met Natalie’s eyes. 

“Those are…..My Mom’s old pajamas.”

Natalie looked down at the sleepwear before she looked back up, giving a couple of quick nods. “Yes. For the girl in your room. You can’t expect her to wear her rain soaked clothes or boy clothes.”

His heart sank as he realized Natalie must have heard Marinette. If Natalie knew, then, did – 

His thoughts must have been plastered over his face because Natalie responded. “Gabriel does not know.”

Adrien sighed heavily, the tight knots in his shoulders dissolving at the news that things might just be okay. He flicked a glance back at the door, wanting to be with Marinette in case she needed him. He looked back at Natalie and at the sympathy in her eyes, the dread hardened into a ball, rising into his chest as the implications of the look in her eyes hit him. “He doesn’t know but….You have to tell him.”

It wasn’t a question but she answered anyway, taking a step closer and pushing the pajamas into his chest in a gesture for him to take them. Her eyes were soft but she nodded. “Yes.”

He took the pajamas into his own arms, looking away with a huff, anger roiling through him like an angry sea. It wasn’t Natalie’s fault and he knew it. He couldn’t take it out on her and Marinette was still in his shower, an awfully long time, and he had to make sure she was okay. The angry sea tossed and turned inside him, boiling into a desperation that sucked away the breath from him. He had to protect Marinette. Even if he had to sell his soul to his own Dad then he was willing to do it. 

“Please, Natalie, can you not tell him?” He could hear his own desperation and winced, feeling tears bite at his eyes as he remembered the desperation of a teen boy crying and asking no one why his mother had left him. “Please? All I ask is just one night. Marinette-It’s…..It’s Marinette. Look, I can’t tell you everything but….” He clutched the clothes in his hands tighter, looking at them, determined not to face Natalie unless he had to. “She’s been hurt. Something happened. She _needs_ me.”

There was a tense, suffocating silence before, quietly, he handed over the reigns of his life. Cat Noir’s collar thickened around his neck and he swallowed past the bitter ache inside his chest. “I’ll…..I’ll do everything, without complaint. I will do whatever he wants, whenever he wants. Just let her stay one night. She’ll be gone tomorrow morning. Please?”

Finally, he looked up and met her eyes. The foyer was so quiet there was no way he could miss the hitch in her breath or the mist in her eyes. One of her hands lifted, towards his bare shoulder, paused. They both looked at her outstretched fingers before, cautiously, she placed it on his cool skin from the rain and squeezed. She took a deep breath, narrowed her eyes, and nodded. It’s so subtle he nearly misses it but when she turns around, her shoulders drop, and Adrien can’t stand to see Natalie like that. She’s agreed not to tell his Dad but he knows the strain he’s putting her under. He, of all people, knows how insufferable his Dad can be.

He watches her figure walk towards the painting where she pauses and looks up, analysing the faces there and something inside him clenches at the small, sad smile he can make out in the darkness of the staircases. 

Adrien takes a step forward and quietly shouts down, careful to keep his voice relatively soft. “Thank you Natalie. For-For being here. And,” He lets out a shaky breath, remembering golden hair and green eyes like his own, wondering if she would forgive him for loving someone else in her place. “I really really do, uh…..” His face flushed and he brought the pajamas up to his face, hiding behind them. “I love you and uh, thanks. Not just for me but-but for Dad.”

He spun on his heels before he could see her reaction and darted into his room, slamming the door shut and leaning against it. His mother’s pajamas were pressed against his face as he slid down the door a small bit. His face was cherry red from his admission. And the small shame he felt that he was betraying his mother. She was always so warm and kind, always smiling. Her eyes were always bright and she was, he remembered fondly, highly emotional. Every emotion she felt, she felt it ten times more than anyone else.

Her happiness made her shine brighter than any star but her sadness could dry up the oceans to cry from her eyes. She was a sensitive woman and she didn’t wear much perfume, somehow always smelling like the royal poinciana blossoms. As a little boy, she had called them the peacock flowers for their beauty and grace, blooming in a fiery tree or on shrubs. She had always smelled of the flowers, pleasant and only slightly sweet. He breathed in then lifted his head when he realized the smell was still subtly there in the pajamas. He looked down at them, fingers running over the silk clothing. 

They were blue with silver hems and borders. Bright green peacocks with dark blue tipped tails and purple eyes decorated the pajamas and he grinned when he remembered his Mother getting them. He had been little and he had begged her to get them. She had but they were a bit too small for her so she hadn’t worn them often but when she did, she made sure to cuddle in bed with him. The fond memory caused him to smile as he approached his bed, setting the clothes down on the edge. He glanced up to see how Plagg and Tikki were doing. 

His kwami was still there, holding Tikki’s little red hand but the poor God was nodding off. His eyes were drooped, ears bent, and he kept blinking to keep his eyes open. Adrien’s smile softened as he leaned over the bed towards Plagg, pushing the kwami over with a finger. Plagg’s eyes shot open, mouth parted in a rant, but Adrien only shoved Plagg gently over to Tikki. The two kwami nestled together with Plagg giving Adrien a lazy glare from his spot on the pillow next to Tikki. “I hate you.”

Adrien nodded sympathetically as he stood back to his feet and stretched, popping his back, eyes glancing nervously at the bathroom door. “So does Hawkmoth. You two could be best friends.”

He heard Plagg snort but his attention was focused on the door, listening for movement. He could hear the shower running but there wasn’t any movement from Marinette. He approached the door on the tips of his toes, quietly, focused on listening for any sound she might need him. When he reached the door, he laid an ear against it, listening for her. The shower was definitely still on, full blast, and from the small crack at the bottom he could feel the steam from the hot water hitting his toes. Sighing, he moved away, giving the door a small glare.

Just as he went to turn around and start making up the couch for him to sleep on, he heard her. It was small, muffled, but his ears would never miss her distress. He swivelled back around, closing his eyes and listening through the door. Crying. She was crying. The sound was muffled through the doors and just as his eyes opened, lost as to what to do for her, she let out a cry that curdled his blood in his veins and made his heart thump in his throat.

Instinct, a fierce urge to wipe away her pain donned on him, urged him to slide open the bathroom door and fling himself forward. He ignored everything, even the flashes of lightning in the window to his right, and threw open the glass doors leading into the wet-room. There was a tub on the right with steps leading up, a powder blue curtain hanging from the ceiling inside the tub. To the left was a metal shower-head and he found her there, head in her hands and trembling. She wasn’t right beneath the spray of the shower but it was falling on her back and sliding down – Down her very not dressed body.

Adrien flushed and slammed his eyes shut, heart pounding in his throat for multiple reasons. Somehow, he had to comfort her, escort her into his room, get her dressed, and put her in his bed all without seeing her naked. Swallowing thickly, he hesitantly called out to her, hoping she would recognize him, “M-Marinette? Hey, it’s okay. It’s me. Adrien. I’m right here, just like I said. It’s-It’s okay.”

She didn’t move and her cries began to escalate, horrible aching cries that tore at his heart and he realized there was no way to really comfort her and move them safely to his room without his eyes. He peeked first one eye open then the other, keeping them fixed on her cheek. He felt the anger flicking at his gut when he saw the bruise marking the left side of her face and clenched his fist at his sides, determined that tomorrow, someone – _Jules_ – was paying for it. He took a slow step forward, heart breaking at the way she flinched from him, trying to curl into herself while standing on shaky legs. 

Adrien paused, afraid to cause her more harm or pain. He simply stilled, staring at her face, and waited. She had her head buried in her hands but he could still see the tears sliding down her cheeks, falling from her jaw. She was trembling and trying to breathe, gasping for air through her sobs. Her eyes were clamped shut and he can see the tightness of her jaw, realizing that she’s remembering. A coil in him snaps and he doesn’t care if she’s naked or wet or that he’s shirtless. She’s in pain, she’s crying, and Adrien – and the cat inside him whimpering at her tears – doesn’t want her to suffer any more.

He lunged forward, the shower spray falling onto him, drenching his jeans and pelting down against his back as he pulled Marinette to him. He had one arm around her shoulders, gripping her arm, and the other across her chest in case she fell. Her hands shot up, gripping the arm across her chest tightly, fingernails digging in. He can’t tell if she’s fighting him or using him for support but he bore with the pain in his arm and moved them, slowly, towards the glass doors. Her feet are clumsy on a good day and tonight, they’re exceptionally left-footed. 

She stumbled but Adrien kept his gaze steady on his goal: if he can get into the bathroom hallway, with the sink and the window, the black marble counters have black, fluffy towels in them. He can grab one, wrap her in it, and carry her into his room. Then….Well, he’ll think about that after she’s wrapped, warm, and in his arms. He manoeuvrers her towards the glass doors and then Marinette completely draws inward, stopping and trying to pull back. Her bare skin on his causes him to take deep, steady breaths, focusing on what she needs.

As calmly as he can, he leans his mouth next to her ear and whispers, “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you. Ever again. Just a little more and I promise, I will leave you alone.”

Marinette begins to struggle a bit more, trying to pull away from him and he’s not sure where she wants to go, but the shock has worn off. Now she can’t hide behind it and now, all the horrible memories are there. If she faces them, she will rise above them stronger. He knows she will but looking down at the struggling girl, crying with her eyes clamped shut and fingernails digging deep into the flesh of his arm, his heart hurts at the pain she suffered. It’s reflected in the cries he hears bouncing off the shower walls, in the way her body trembles and she’s trying to pull away from him even though he would die before he hurt her.

It’s reflected in the way she can’t open her eyes, afraid to see her attacker, afraid to find herself back in his clutches. It’s reflected in the bruise on her cheek, on the small bruises he can see dotting her body sometimes when he sees a patch of skin in his vision. The reflection of her battle is in the tension of her body, coiled taut like a rubber band about to be snapped. She’s about to snap and he hopes she flies instead of breaks. 

As soon as they reach the glass, Adrien knows, with her struggling, he’ll never get them both through without her smashing either the glass or his jaw to pieces. He’s seen Ladybug’s strength and he knows a broken jaw would be the least of his worries. Panting from holding his strong partner from hurting him and herself, he slowly slides in front of her, gripping both her arms in a tight grasp. Marinette screams and the sound grates against Adrien’s heart, his chest constricting that _he’s_ hurting her. But he can’t risk her hurting herself. He grips her arms tight and uses the grasp on her arms to keep her feet firmly on the floor, sliding her forward so she can’t kick him. She’s wailing and panting now and he keeps flicking his gaze from the marble counters to her, making sure she’s not hurting herself. 

Sweat dots his forehead and he can feel his earlier aching muscles now tighten and burn with strain. He can feel the fragile glass of one door being held by his shoulder and he turns, pivoting Marinette while still gripping her arms as he lets the glass door swing closed. Sighing in relief, Adrien backs her towards the counters while making sure to keep his distance so as not to alarm her further. He looks at the cupboard to their right and reaches down, pulling it open and grabbing at one of the fluffy towels. 

He made the mistake of letting Marinette’s arm go and before he can make a sound of triumph, he feels her free hand sock him in the shoulder. Her fist was small but he winced with every hit, feeling the bruise forming after the first hit. Yep, Marinette was definitely his Bug. He pulls the towel up and drapes it around her shoulders, not giving her time to respond before he bends and sweeps her into his arms. Maybe it was the familiarity of the hold from Cat Noir but she instantly wraps her arms around his neck. Her head buries itself against his neck and her cries grow softer, something he’s thankful for.

Gently and slowly, Adrien carries her toward the open doorway, her hands gripping the towel so tight he can see her fingers going bleach white. He slips sideways through the doorway and the moment Plagg sees Marinette’s almost naked form, he receives the most incredulous look from the cat God yet. Hell, if his eyes got any bigger they might just pop out of his skull. The kwami flew to his side in an instant, looking down at Marinette then up at him. 

“Kid….What are you thinking!?”

Adrien winced when Plagg smacked him with the sharp flick of his tail against Adrien’s bare shoulder. “She was crying! Natalie brought her some PJ’s can you help me change her? Please?”

Plagg’s open mouth, retort ready, closed as he eyed his Chosen with narrowed eyes. His expression melted into a sly smirk as he raised an eyebrow. “So…..You just have girly pajamas lying around in case Ladybug falls into your room and needs to stay?”

Adrien gives him a half-glare before his lips twist into a smile at the familiar air surrounding them. Light and playful and as Adrien carries Marinette towards his bed and the pajamas, he asks the floating kwami next to him, “How’s Tikki? Is she doing any better?”

When they reach the edge of the bed, Plagg flies forward and towards the red kwami still cuddled beneath the sheet. She’s no longer sweating and Adrien grins when he sees the small smile on her lips. His heart lifts in elation that Plagg won’t have to suffer any more! 

He spins his head in excitement to Plagg, his golden hair flying around his head like a shiny halo. “She’s smiling Plagg! I think she’s gonna be okay!”

Plagg coughed into a paw, his cheeks glowing red against his pitch black fur. “Well, yeah. She’s Tikki. She can pull through anything.” His green eyes softened when he looked at Tikki and Adrien felt his heart twist. “Her smile has saved me more than she knows.”

Adrien looked down at Marinette and he knew exactly what Plagg meant. But the way Plagg spoke, it was like…..Adrien’s eyes widened as he looked at his kwami in shock. “”S-She doesn’t know!”

Plagg looked at him with a raised eyebrow, like he had lost his mind. “You’re going to have to give me more than that, kid.”

“She doesn’t know you love her!”

Plagg’s cheeks darkened and his tail flicked in embarrassment as he eyed Tikki’s softly breathing form. His expression slowly melted into one of fondness. “No. Tikki….She’s my best friend. We’re best friends. We’re probably more than that but there isn’t a word for surviving 8000 years together so best friends is pretty close.” He chuckled. “And in all the time we’ve existed, in all the time Cat Noir and Ladybug have existed…..She has never known I love her as more than that.” His voice quieted but his eyes flicked to Adrien. “And that’s fine with me.”

He got the hint. He nodded towards Plagg in recognition. “Because their happiness comes first, always. No matter how much your own heart breaks.”

Plagg grinned. “Seems you’re learning something after all. Not completely stupid.”

Adrien gave him a deadpan look before he rolled his eyes and carried the still trembling Marinette in his arms to the edge of his bed. He lowered her there, careful not to touch her and avoid touching the patches of her bare skin. When she was sitting on the edge of the bed, he reached for the pajamas, sitting on his haunches in front of her. He kept his eyes mostly downcast and his gaze focused on the silk cloth in his hands. He reached for one of her hands gripping the towel to her and held it in his own, his eyes gentle as he gazed at her face. 

Her blue pools were unfocused when they looked at his hand in hers and he knew this next bit was going to be hard for her. Taking a deep breath, he spoke calmly to her. “Marinette, it’s okay. I just need to get you dressed. Then you can go to bed, okay?”

She didn’t move or even register that he had spoken and for a moment, Adrien thought she may have fainted sitting there but her hand gave his a squeeze. The towel fell to the bed when she let go of it and Adrien kept his eyes on hers as he pulled the silk top over the back of her shoulders. It had a collar that was bent down and it was long sleeved, perfect for the cool of Spring. He used his free hand to grab hers and tuck it into the silk sleeve before he did the same with the other, letting go of her hands in the process. 

As soon as her arms were through and he began to button the top, he breathed a sigh of relief. One part down, one more to go. He looked down at Marinette’s bare feet and her ankles then to the silk bottoms of the pajama set and hesitated, not sure how to go about dressing her without causing horrible memories for her. It grew quiet and the only sounds were the two kwami’s breathing, the rain pounding against the roof, and the rumbling thunder of the storm. The rain was so heavy it looked pitch black outside Adrien’s windows and he winced when all he saw was a bright flash of lightning, knowing this wasn’t helping Marinette’s terror.

Well, better to try then not at all. “Marinette, can you…..Can you stand?”

She didn’t move and Adrien sighed, preparing to rise to his feet and help her, when she stood up so suddenly he nearly fell over with a yelp. He blinked up at her. Her head was downcast and he could see her face scrunched in concentration and pain. His heart thumped in pain at the sight that she was trying to be strong and he could already see the pieces of her being built back up. One of his hands grabbed the silk bottoms while the other gave her knee a squeeze. She was being strong and if she could muster the strength to stand, he could move past his embarrassment of dressing her but before he could even gather the courage, lithe trembling fingers danced across the knuckles of his own.

To his utter astonishment, her fingers lifted to his face, caressing his eyebrows and ghosting across his eyelids. He looked up into her face and melted through the floor at the look in her blue gaze. Her pools drowned him in their emotions and he felt his heart squeeze painfully as his chest tried to implode from the emotions surging from her blue gaze into his own, electrifying yet freezing at the same time. He could see her terror screaming at him from within those orbs and for the not last time, he wanted to kill that bastard – Jules; he wasn’t sure he would ever forget that name. Ghosting around the edges of her blue gaze was the darker blue of a roiling ocean. 

She wanted to fight but she was drowning in herself. It shook his entire body when he realized why: she thought she was _weak_. Drawn into her gaze, he couldn’t even muster the words to fight her or prove how wrong she was before the next turbulent ride of emotions crashed through him from the girl above. He could see the specks of Ladybug dancing in her gaze. Strength was building in that heart, that body, that mind, and it was surging into her gaze in specks of blue that looked like flashes of lightning like the Parisian storm. 

Strength and…...His green gaze softened when he realized that she was feeling strong but dependent. On _him_. She needed him to help her and the thought caused a burst of warmth to explode inside him at the fact that this strong, amazing girl actually needed him. His gaze danced over hers, feeling her through those deep pools of blue, and hoping she could read him, too. The small, familiar grin – Ladybug was smiling at him in that teasing, mock exasperated way she did whenever he teased her too much or made a really bad pun – of his partner peeked out from the face of the same girl who had sat behind him for 2 years. 

When her fingers gently, but firmly, pushed his eyelids down he could do nothing but follow her lead, heart finally calming to a gentle rhythm in his chest when faced with the darkness of his closed eyes. Yet all he could remember were those eyes – Ladybug and Marinette – beginning to heal from the night’s events. He smiled gently, proud and yet defeated, at the fact this girl had held his heart for years. 

When he felt her fingers graze his own, he felt every inch of his skin light up, electric and sparking, and he inhaled sharply at the intensity. But her hands wrapped around the silk cloth dangling loosely from his grip and pulled it away, the silk sliding across his skin nowhere near as powerful as Marinette. She was a force as herself and his partner – because they were the same. He knew without a doubt: there was never going to be a Ladybug if it wasn’t Marinette. She _was_ Ladybug. And Adrien felt lucky to know who she was beneath the mask. He also knew, with an inward wince, she was not going to be happy that he knew. 

He figured when she remembered his reveal, he was going to be in even more trouble and he wasn’t sure what the term for ‘in the dog house’ would be for a cat, but whatever it was, he was headed for it when she found out. As he heard the rustling of the cloth, signalling she was stepping into the pants, he lifted his shoulders in support. He heard a breathy laugh before a small hand was on his left shoulder to support herself as she stepped into the pants. Her grip was still shaky and he could feel the determination licking beneath her fingertips. 

He was a collared cat and he belonged to one Marinette Dupain-Cheng. If lost please return to M’Lady. He didn’t realize he had chuckled aloud until her small, wavering voice filtered into his ears. “What’s so funny?”

He grinned and looked up without opening his eyes to where he knew her face was, feeling those blue orbs staring at him. “Just thinking, nothing you need to worry about Princess.”

His heart pounded at the slip up and he cast his eyes downward. When she only hummed he breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn’t completely conscious and functioning so he wasn’t getting neutered just yet; he didn’t have high hopes for the future. When her hand gave him a gentle squeeze before it left, he opened his eyes to see the beautiful silk pajamas of his mother’s. He smiled despite the ache in his chest and stood, slowly so as not to startle her, to his feet. He found himself looking at the top of Marinette’s black-blue hair. 

He wasn’t much taller than her but he was still growing and he smiled at the thought that one day she wouldn’t even reach his chin. Coughing into a fist, he gestured with his head toward the bed behind her. “You should get some sleep. Here, let me tuck you in.”

He heard Plagg’s snickers from his corner and gave the kwami a death glare, pulling back the blue duvet so Marinette could crawl in. He glanced between Marinette and Plagg, hoping she would disregard the black cat sitting beside her unconscious red bug sprite. She didn’t even look in their direction, climbing into the bed on all fours before falling against the bed on her side. Her head was bent towards the knees she curled to her chest, eyes closed tight as her arms wrapped around her body. It was vulnerable and Adrien wanted to wrap himself around her too, anything to make her feel safe. 

He clenched the heavy duvet in his hands to keep from reaching out and touching her – holding her – and pulled them over her frail body. He leaned on his hands on the bed, looking over the girl in his bed, and one of the corners of his lips twitched upwards only slightly as he whispered, “I’m gonna turn off the light. Goodnight, Princess.”

He leaned down, lids half-closed, and pressed his lips against the side of her head in a feather light touch. His eyes closed completely as he let his nose take her in, the smell of water from the shower and the sweet smell that always followed Marinette still enveloping her frame. Leaning away, he seared the image of her into his mind – like he always did, with Marinette and Ladybug, wanting to always remember every moment with both sides of her. It must have been late and when he reached for the light remote, his yawn nearly tore his jaw apart. 

He lifted one hand to rub across his face, suddenly feeling drained and exhausted, his body heavy from the tension and emotions that had powered through him. His mind wanted to shut down and he yawned again, flicking the switch all the way down. Just as the lights blinked out, a vast flash of lightning lit the black sky of Paris. It was a beautiful moment Adrien turned to see, almost like slow motion in his eyes. As the lightning flared to life, every drop of rain sparked with the light, creating a shiny, wet drop of light and water. He blinked at the intricate display and nearly missed the loud, jarring noise of thunder that boomed and shook the mansion as he stumbled toward the white couch he could see in his line of sight.

He did not, however, miss the gasp of terror from the bed. He snapped his head to look at the black outline of the bed just as Plagg’s tired voice shouted over to him, “Kid, something’s wrong. She’s shaking like a leaf!”

Adrien didn’t bother to care what was in his way as he launched himself forward, colliding with the table and the globe with a yelp. Darting to the side, he hurled himself toward the shaking form on the bed. His hands reached for her as he pulled and rolled her quaking body to the edge of the bed. Her face was turned towards his panting body as his nerves grew taut with tension, every cell of his body demanding he take away the pain from her. The rain picked up it’s intense hammering against the roof, thunder still roiling in the distance. 

He took one second to look out the window at the dark, stormy night and that one second was all it took. He watched the next flash of lightning light up Paris before he felt two hands grip for his shirt. When they found purchase of only his bare chest, daring fingers slipped into the waistband of his pants…..And promptly jerked him. Stumbling with a sound between a yelp and a squawk, Adrien found himself tumbling into the bed. But those hands were used to tossing villains. With a quick jerk and snap of her wrists, Marinette – dainty, clumsy Marinette – managed to flip him over her and onto his back. 

He blinked at his ceiling, confused and completely surprised, but before he had time to take a breath Marinette threw herself at him. Curling against him, she wrapped her arms and legs around whatever parts of his body she could reach. She was trembling and when she buried her head against his chest, he heard the gut wrenching cries echoing from within her. Something stirred inside him and he rolled over to his side, facing her and pulling her against him, burying his nose into the top of the hair on her head. He felt his eyes fall closed. 

She wrapped both arms around him, fingers digging into his shoulder blades with a force that left him breathless. Her body was shaking with her cries and he could feel her chest stuttering against his own, her heart trying to cope with everything flying through it. One of his hands was sitting on her hip, rubbing circles into the flesh he could feel when her shirt had rode up. His other was wrapped around to the back of her head, gently pressing her head into his collarbone. He laid there, letting her cry and content to just hold her. He didn’t expect the words to pour from her lips. Marinette cried out her pain, etching it into his own heart with every word.

She told him everything. She didn’t believe she was good enough to be Ladybug – how she could have ever thought that…! Marinette was drowning in the expectations of Ladybug, the girl behind the mask was dying in it, and Adrien’s stomach flipped at the revelation. Marinette had never acknowledged that _she_ was Ladybug and he vowed, that night, to never let her believe that again – as Cat Noir _and_ Adrien. And the guilt at sealing away Tikki – beautiful Tikki who didn’t deserve a clumsy girl like her. Adrien begged to differ. 

She spoke of Jules – Adrien hadn’t been able to prevent his hand rubbing circles in her hip from curling into her skin – and the happiness he brought her. It was the only time her sobs let her breathe and Adrien questioned how much Jules had acted before he had struck. The thought alone curdled the blood in his veins like soured milk. Her voice carried over to him, striking him deep when the terror and the fear lilted her tone. The footsteps, the attack. She cried as she told him she had tried to fight, she had _tried_ …..! But she had failed. Marinette wasn’t strong enough to fight him off. 

Adrien listened quietly, his lips sealed shut. If he said anything, he wasn’t sure his voice alone wouldn’t scare her off. As her cries lessened and her speech began to slur, Adrien promised himself, one more minute. He wanted to hold her only one more minute. He blinked his eyes open sleepily, to half-mast as he listened to her ramble about cat’s in the night and golden bells before exhaustion swept through him. Slowly, his eyes closed as his head fell against soft, black-blue locks. 

The only sounds he heard as he faded to sleep was the soft breathing of the kwami’s behind him, the quiet breathing of the girl he loved in his arms, and the stormy night that echoed not just in Paris’ streets but in Marinette’s heart as she healed. He faded to darkness at the tired, sleepy whisper of, “I love you.”


	8. Breath of Creation and Truthful Awakenings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At last, the shock begins to wear off. In the early hours of the morning, the truth must be faced. Can Marinette come to terms with who she is? Or will this be the end of Ladybug? Can she overcome the darkness of her fear? All hope is lost when Tikki's form begins to fade. How do you save Life itself? 
> 
> Protective Plagg, dying Tikki, and the memories of fear all converge. Can Marinette overcome it or will she sink? Will she be able to face Adrien or this is the end of Ladybug and Cat Noir.....Forever?

Slowly, consciousness began to dawn through the murky depths of sleep. Splashes of light exploded behind closed, bluebell orbs and she groaned quietly against the Sun’s rays. Vying for more sleep, deeming it too early for school, Marinette buried her nose against her firm pillow, encased in a warmth that was lulling her back to sleep. A sense of peace and grogginess fell over her as she felt her tense body relax into the comforter. A familiar scent wafted into her nose and she hummed at the way it made her feel safe, content. She let out a quiet, breathy sigh of contentment the moment the warmth seemed to tighten it’s embrace around her.

She hovered in the quiet space between wakefulness and slumber, her mind groggy and filled with the heavy haze of sleep. The more she breathed, the more focus centred around her body as life flowed through it. Her eyebrows furrowed in her groggy, sleepy state as she rolled her right ankle. It twinged slightly whenever she rolled it but Marinette knew how much of a restless sleeper she was, shrugging it off as having slammed it against the metal frame of her loft bed. Or twisting it in her sleep due to a dream. Both had happened before she thought sleepily. 

She stretched her feet out, toes wiggling and mindful of her ankle, as feeling slowly returned to her heavy, sleep-logged limbs. Her legs were a bit stiff and Marinette felt something cold swell in her gut, a festering thought unclear in the depths of sleep. She felt like she had when she had been a little girl and being chased around Place des Vosges by her Papa. She remembered the stiff tension in them, a tension that was there now except this time she was vaguely aware she had not been chased around the park near her home by her Papa. 

The icy ball in her stomach became a burning chill and her heart stuttered in her chest. She stretched first the left leg, bending it back to her butt before stretching it straight again. The muscles remained stiff even when she moved to the right leg. Confused and sleepy, Marinette took a calming breath. She moved a lot in her sleep so maybe she had had a nightmare. But then why hadn’t Tikki woken her up? Well, if she was a mass of flailing limbs, she didn’t blame Tikki for not waking her up either. Feeling her body relaxing once more, the muscles in her legs and her ankle still pulsed out tension. 

She lifted her leg and dropped it lazily over her long, warm cat body pillow and used her foot to bring it closer to her body. It was much firmer than she was used to but Marinette didn’t have it in her to replace it. Her Maman had gotten it for her long before when it had been three times her size. Squeezing the cat pillow in fond recognition, she breathed in deeply and hummed as she curled closer into the wonderful smelling warmth of her bed, her pillow, and her blanket. She reached over with her loose arm and threw it over the form of her cat pillow.

Her arm ached at the motion and Marinette hovered in-between wakefulness and sleep, trying to deduce why most of her body was sore, aching, or filled with a pulsating tension. She was a restless sleeper but she had never felt like this before waking up. Her body felt as heavy as a bowling ball and she could feel every muscle, every groove, every ache down to her bones. A sore, throbbing pain erupted inside her skull and she couldn’t help the small, quiet whimper. Brain about to explode and body on the brink of destruction, Marinette was unable to fathom what was happening. The ball of icy dread spread, numbing her just as she blearily cracked her left eye open. 

That was _definitely_ not her cat pillow.

And the illusion shattered before her open blue orb. Chest constricting in panic, the pain settled into her weary body as the memories finally came back in the early, dawn hours. The sun was barely rising above the city line outside the wall of windows, it’s rays just touching her face that was now wide awake. She jolted and slammed her eyes shut at the onslaught of dizzying memories and buried her head into her pillow to escape it. Jules. Jules had been so kind and warm and – 

And then all she could feel was that cold hand that smothered her cries. All she could feel was the cold, hard brick against her back, arms held up by a tight, bruising grip. Her cheek pulsed to remind her of the slap and Marinette felt her heart thundering in her chest, reliving last night all over again. Chest growing tighter and heart beating erratically, black dots danced behind her vision as she grew closer and closer to passing out. All she wanted to do was escape the pain, the memories, escape, run, hide……!

Luminescent, slit green eyes staring into her own halted her body. She froze huddled in her bed, hands covering her face as she tried to remember how to breathe. In and out, Marinette, in and out. Slowly, her breathing regulated and she breathed a gaspy cry remembering the hero who saved her. The darkness in his eyes still caused a flurry of panic to swirl inside her. For some reason, the thought of it left her breathless and afraid that maybe that beast lurking inside would swallow her best friend whole. 

Her bluebell orbs snapped wide open and she jerked backwards. Her pillow just breathed. And unless she got a new pillow that breathed that wasn’t possible. What she saw was even more impossible because there was no way in hell she was lying with Adrien Agreste in her bed. Except…..She narrowed her gaze onto the dark blue comforter that most certainly was _not_ hers, the large King size bed she didn’t own, and her gaze was drawn, incredulously, back to the softly sleeping boy. She swallowed the thick, dry lump in her throat as her cheeks practically burst into flames.

What was she doing in Adrien Agreste’s bed!?!?!? She slammed her hands into her forehead, wincing at the painful throbbing that caused but unable to catch her thoughts as she tried to remember how she got here and in bed with her crush no less! Cat Noir had saved her; those eyes were unmistakable. But everything after was a hazy, numb blur of colours and lights. Something danced at the edges of her memories, a burst of colour in her eyes, and her heart sank as she looked slowly up at the peacefully sleeping boy’s face as the memory dawned on her. Shock made her eyes widen to the size of dinner plates.

She was in pain, her entire body not only hurt it _ached_ , she was mentally exhausted, she could still feel fear and panic biting at her feet, she remembered having nightmare after nightmare, she remembered screaming and crying and – Her lip wobbled as more memories came to the front of her mind, these memories gentle as they washed through her tired, drained mind. She couldn’t remember much only darkness and her crying out then – Then warm arms pulling her close and whispering tired, hoarse consolations and endearments. She didn’t remember the dreams because all she could remember was the boy who chased them away. 

Her heart suddenly twinged as her eyes welled with tears. She blinked quickly to try and clear them as the tender memories of the night before coursed through her, overriding the horrible assault and the nightmares she couldn’t remember. Cat Noir holding her close as they soared above Paris, the memory in shocking clarity. Pitch black, stormy sky surrounded them, the air thick and suffocating with the feeling of rain. The air around them had been filled with that wet, heavy smell of rain and the tension of the storm brewing in the black sky. 

He had carried her through not just the physical storm but _her_ storm. He had _saved_ her. Marinette wasn’t stupid. She had done the fighting, she had fought for her own survival and had gotten away. She had fought herself – she _was_ Ladybug – and she had fought losing pieces of her but the only time she had truly felt safe was in Cat Noir’s arms. He had launched them through the night, taking her away from her pain and her fear. Her heart fluttered weightlessly inside of her and she could still feel the cold wet rain still drenching her soul. But her heart froze in it’s flutters at the words that registered in her mind.

_”Oh, Bug, I know. But I’m here.”_

Her eyes trailed over that familiar face as everything fell silent inside and around her, the ‘click’ inside of her as loud as glass shattering. Her blue orbs traced the golden blond hair – it was so messy and flyaway while he slept that there was no denying it after seeing that but she pressed on, needing confirmation – down to the slant of his forehead. Eyes flew over the bridge of his nose to those lips she remembered kissing her forehead in the night and uttering the sweetest words she ever remembered hearing. 

She blinked quickly as tears welled again, this time unable to stop one from slipping past her lashes as she truly looked at Adrien Agreste and all she could see was the black mask and slit green eyes. Adrien Agreste was Cat Noir. Cat Noir had saved her last night – no, he had saved her many times; all the time! …..Cat Noir was in love with Ladybug. Ladybug was Marinette. 

Cat Noir called Marinette ‘Bug’…...Adrien Agreste knew Marinette was Ladybug. 

Her thoughts halted as her aching head had enough of the truth. It retaliated by slamming against her skull in sharp, pounding thumps that made her stomach turn with queasiness. She breathed deeply and swallowed back the nausea. Adrien’s sleeping face chose that second to turn towards her and her breath caught, heart fluttering inside her chest. No one could deny Adrien Agreste was a pretty beautiful boy and Marinette was no exception. Except now, somehow, knowing he was Cat Noir made it all much more intimate, intense, and Marinette could feel the depth of everything rolling over like waves of the ocean into the shore. 

Her best friend was the boy she loved and the boy she loved was her partner. Who she had rejected. Several times. Marinette’s brain shut down as she turned her head sideways and buried it in the white mattress cover, sighing out her distress in a frustrated, drawn out groan. Embarrassment flooded her as the realization crashed into her: she had rejected Adrien Agreste. Her head throbbed but she shoved it aside as she peeked one eye out at Adrien’s sleeping face. Her single visible eye narrowed into a soft glare as she mumbled into the bed, “This is all _your_ fault.”

Sighing, she let the tension in her body seep away and breathed out heavily. Her cheek was bruised and sore, she could feel it, and she knew they would have to talk about last night – she had no intention of letting him know she knew his identity, not yet – but for now, all Marinette wanted was to feel _safe_ against the memories, the nightmares, and the fear dug into her heart. She sniffled quietly and scooted closer towards him, her head ducked slightly as she gazed at the precarious sleeping position. She had not cuddled her pillow but she had, indeed, cuddled a cat. Her arms were wedged between them, held to her fast beating heart.

Her legs were curled slightly upwards, knees bent toward Adrien’s body but it did nothing against the warm arm draped over her hip. His hand was splayed across her lower back protective and warm and safe. His other was beneath her neck to cushion her head and pull her towards his chest in the night from all her flailing and screaming. Marinette bit her lip so tight she almost drew blood when she saw the fact that Adrien was sans a shirt. Adrien didn’t usually model without a shirt but she had seen his chest before – they went swimming in school together!

But this? This was what made things intimate between them. And right now intimate felt scary. She squeezed her eyes shut at the terror flooding her, knowing she was safe with Adrien, but she couldn’t erase the cold, empty touches and her aching body proved her fear. Regret smashed into her as she tried to reason that this was _Adrien_ , this was Cat Noir, and she trusted him with her life! But she couldn’t stop the fear slithering up her leg, over her hip, twisting in her gut, and sinking it’s poisonous fangs into her heart. 

Just when she debated getting up and running, as if sensing her thoughts and her distress, instinctive fingers twitched against her back and that was the only warning she got. The next minute she was thrust forward with a gasp, her hands splayed out on Adrien’s chest as he crushed her to him with that single hand. The other curled up and into her hair, running long fingers through the strands. His soft lips pressed a small kiss to the top of her head as her body moulded to his. His hold was like iron branding her to his body and Marinette flushed to even the tips of her hair.

Heat flared to life between their forms and he made sleepy noises resembling something between a purr and the ‘shh’ sound. She bit her lip as she fought back a smile at the sound. Even as Adrien he was cat-like and trying to comfort her, not aware she was awake. He nuzzled his nose into her hair and she knew he was out the moment his hands relaxed, allowing her to have some breathing room. She used the hands on his chest to shakily push back a little, his hand not letting her completely leave his grip. 

She smiled affectionately, eyes soft, as she looked at him. She furrowed her eyebrows as the proximity brought forth another memory of her sweet cat-boy. Green eyes looking deeply into her own staring up at his, so close their noses almost touched. She had wanted him to kiss her, erase the feel of slithering lips smashed against her own, but she saw the moment his gaze darkened and his mouth twisted into a pained frown. He had pushed her, the cold metal of the baton on her chest still lingering in the dawn of morning. Her hands clasped where the cold metal had bit into her and she was grateful he hadn’t kissed her, no matter how much she had wanted it.

And she did want it. Her first kiss was stolen and she would do anything to erase the cold, wet kiss of a stranger but she wanted more than that. And Cat – Adrien – had proved he valued her more than that. The memory she had pushed back burst into clarity as she, unable to resist, lifted her hand. Hesitantly, she gripped his right cheek with her left hand, fingers dancing on the back of his jaw. Colours had swirled and twisted around him – green, yellow, and black – as Cat Noir faded and Adrien was revealed. She could still see the bright, forlorn look in those green orbs as he revealed his trust in her. 

Maybe he thought she wouldn’t remember. Her fingers tickled the blonde hair that was stuck behind his ear. The rest was blurry and a haze of muted conversations, flashes of colour, and a slamming noise that sounded like a window being harshly closed. The sound registered but the memory was gone and Marinette was left empty, hand still dancing along Adrien’s cheek and jaw. She blinked, at first not registering what she was seeing but as it dawned on her, Marinette jerked her hand back and held it up to her face. 

The silky pajamas were definitely not hers and definitely not what she was wearing last night. They were beautiful yet childish. A silky blue with a silver hem along the cuff of the sleeve, decorated with peacocks that had amazing purple eyes. She gently lifted up the duvet to check, swallowing her nerves, and felt her eyes widen. Yep, pants too. Adrien had not only saved her but….He had seen her naked. Panic and embarrassment erupted inside her as she thrust the duvet over her body, only her head peeking out as she tried to hide her face in the comforting duvet. 

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to remember through her hazy memories what exactly had happened and hoping Adrien hadn’t dressed her. She wouldn’t put it past him, wanting to help her, but a part of her also felt apprehension. She trusted him with her life, both inside and outside of her and his suits, but her fear wouldn’t let her rest that she couldn’t trust _anyone_ any more. A white-hot pain shot through her head but Marinette pressed on, trying to drag up the memory from the depths of her subconscious. Like a flip being switched for light to flood a room, a memory rushed forward. 

Hot water cascading in a tiled room, steam rising from the ground to curl around her ankles. It felt good against her aching body and the steam from the hot shower called for her to step into it’s warmth. But all Marinette could feel was _numb_. All she could remember was stepping beneath the hot water, the spray scalding against her skin but nothing could erase the crawling in her flesh. Pain exploded in her skull at the memory of the tears and the cries as she had scrubbed at her arms and her body until her skin had flushed an angry red but still, _still_ , her skin didn’t feel like her own. She felt dirty.

Her eyes snapped open when the image of blonde hair lunged for her. The way he had held her made her heart stir in her chest painfully. All she could remember was the pain and the fear, the way she had felt the touch and wanted to just get away from it. She had fought him, the whole way, and still he hadn’t left her alone. The memories of him carrying her, dressing her, were burned in her brain. His touch had been soft and gentle, warm, and Marinette felt her gut flip when the hazy image of her closing his eyes filtered in. 

He had dressed her and…..It was all a dark, quiet blur but she shook her head in mortification as her embarrassment reached a new level: she had pulled Adrien Agreste into bed with her. It was clear – she was both proud and humiliated that he had been prepared to sleep on the couch in his own room – that Adrien had done nothing short of care for her. She swallowed the hot lump in her throat and bit her lip, gazing tenderly at the boy she loved. And knowing he was Cat Noir only made her love him _more_. Something stirred inside her, unbreakable, and she was filled with a strength she hadn’t known she possessed. 

She gave a small, slightly confident smile at the boy in front of her. When he woke up, she would know where they stood. There would be no masks, no lies, no secrets to hide behind. She blinked, eyebrows scrunching together. Lifting her head slightly, she gazed at something behind Adrien’s beautifully sleeping face that had caught her eye. Not quite able to catch what it was, Marinette scooted a bit closer and peeked over Adrien’s broad shoulder. Her bluebell orbs widened when they met clearly surprised glowing slit eyes. 

The piece of Camembert cheese that had been held suspended above the black cat’s wide open mouth fell to the bed in a crumbly mess as his eyes remained frozen on her own large pair. They both blinked in tandem at the surprise of being caught as the truth seeped into what it was exactly they were both seeing. The black kwami darted upwards, mouth frozen open, as he attempted to figure out what to do in a panic. Marinette shook her head quickly, her eyes darting to Adrien’s sleeping form. Green orbs followed before the kwami seemed to relax only slightly, his eyes narrowed onto her a moment later.

She blinked at the weariness in that gaze like a cat deciding if trusting her was worth it’s time. Looking away from the weary God, she looked down at Adrien below her. His mouth was frowning, his eyes crinkled at the corners and for a split second, Marinette felt time slow to a halt. His fingers were dug slightly into her hip and it seemed like, even in sleep, he had to debate if he could pull her closer. This one moment brought forth a charge of emotion, powerful, a waterfall crashing through her. She took a deep breath and time resumed. 

Lifting her arms she slowly, carefully, manoeuvred one arm beneath Adrien’s head, his own falling to clutch at the back of the silky shirt. Her other lifted to press his head into the crook of her collarbone, her chin nestling amongst the golden locks. She ran her fingers through his hair, offering him what little comfort she could. The fear and the panic were there, gnawing at the back of her mind that he could turn on her, too….! But her trust in him was greater than the fear. 

She looked up at the kwami who was still watching her, his narrowed gaze now accompanied by a small frown. She didn’t say anything, seeing the storm brewing in those eyes, tail twitching behind him. His slits were focused on her, intent and probing, and Marinette fidgeted beneath the covers. Why did this feel like a test or an interview? 

The God seemed to find something as he heaved a heavy sigh and rolled his eyes. Little paws crossed over his chest as he muttered, “You broke his heart.”

Marinette winced, suddenly remembering a time on a balcony a long time ago. A red rose and a kiss on the cheek that had, to her utter surprise, left her breathless. Her gaze fell back to Adrien, his body loose again. He had managed to throw one of his legs over both of hers and she was rather snugly pressed up into him. 

She tried to smile but knew it didn’t reach her eyes. “I didn’t know.”

The little kwami snorted as he gazed at her in what almost resembled a sneer. “So if you had known you wouldn’t have broken his heart? That’s not any better, girl. Listen, you don’t need this, not-not now.” The black cat shook his head and flew forwards until they were face to face, his eyes boring into hers. His eyes glowed bright with a protective glimmer. “But you broke him. So you’re responsible for putting the pieces back together. He didn’t hurt you. He was, I gotta hand it to him, a perfect gentleman.” 

Marinette watched the little cat’s eyes flicker to his sleeping Chosen, his head cocking to the side as he gazed down and Marinette knew not to mention the affection she saw. The God’s large ears flicked backwards slightly as he looked back up at her. “I’m sorry, bout what happened to you. You,” He looked down as he awkwardly flicked his tail. “You didn’t deserve it.”

Hot tears welled in her eyes as she gave a watery smile to the kwami trying hard to console her. “Thank you, uh...”

The cat blinked slowly before he sighed again. “Right, we haven’t met. Plagg. I love Camembert. Nice to meet you.”

Her mood wasn’t quite up to her usual exuberance but she wasn’t feeling too depressed so she settled for a quick nod and a small smile at Plagg’s floating form. “Nice to meet you, too, Plagg. You probably already know but….I’m Marinette.”

She wasn’t sure what to make of the expression Plagg was making at her words. It was all a jumbled mix of exasperation, annoyance, and mischievousness all laced with a tinge of amusement. When he spoke, his voice was a bit softer. “Yeah, I know who you are. Trust me, I know.”

Not sure what to make of the cryptic words and the odd glance he gave the sleeping Adrien, she opened her mouth to ask when a thought in the back of her mind solidified. Her expression dropped and Plagg tensed. 

“You alright?”

Marinette darted frantic eyes up to the green eyed God and she had to keep from shouting, “Kwami can sense kwami, right?”

Plagg hesitated but nodded. “Most of the time.”

“Where’s Tikki? Where’s my kwami?”

Panic clouded her brain and all she could remember about Tikki was the sad smile she had – Her eyes widened at the memory that broke through of a humanistic, red haired Tikki as her eyes steadied on Plagg’s. “You have…..Human forms?”

Plagg’s jaw dropped and it was clear this was not a question he had expected. He hesitated and turned around, looking down at something she couldn’t see, before his shoulders dropped as he muttered, “We do. That’s…..” Plagg looked at her over his shoulder and Marinette’s face reddened at the soft look in the cat’s eyes. “It’s special for us. It shows Tikki’s trust in you.”

Heart heavy, she blew out a quiet breath and curled her fingers into Adrien’s soft, silky hair. His own arms tightened around her and he mumbled as he nuzzled his head against her. She squeaked when he tried to curl up while holding her before she gently soothed him back into resting with their limbs entangled. Plagg’s slit gaze never broke from her and when she met it again, her blood thrummed at the tender expression he wore. 

He shook his head, half smile dancing about his lips. “He needs you.”

Marinette’s bluebell orbs softened, remembering the boy before the mask. “He needs you, too, Plagg.”

The cat opened his mouth, probably to make smart retort, but his ears flattened to his head at a jarring cough. Blue orbs flashed to a form huddled beneath a white sheet, the loud coughs hoarse and grating. Both Plagg and Marinette waited with baited breath as the form shifted, tossing and turning, before it shuddered and lie still. Her heart stopped in her chest as she saw the flash of red and her breathing came to an abrupt halt. She was not prepared for Plagg to dart at the speed of a bullet to Tikki’s prone form, his little paws lifting her in his arms. He carried her closer to Marinette and a cry escaped her at the sight of her kwami.

Her red colour had dulled and her body was lined with black cracks. Her small arms hung loose and limp from her body. Plagg’s terrified expression when he looked at Tikki caused fear and panic to swell up in Marinette’s chest as she tried to fight back tears. This couldn’t be happening, not now. Marinette needed Tikki and for more than just a mask with super powers; Tikki was her closest friend, one who knew all her secrets and never judged her, and trying to imagine a life without the happy, bright kwami was something Marinette didn’t want to do.

Plagg held her to his chest, his little nose bending down to Tikki’s and he simply closed his eyes. Relishing in the feel of the limp, dying Tikki in his arms, Plagg’s voice was overcome with emotion spilling forth when he spoke. “She loves you. She loves you so much…..”

Marinette bit her lip, grimacing, when her eyes filled with tears. The tender, red skin beneath her eyes alerted her to the amount of crying she had done and when the first tear fell, it burned from her eyes like acid. “I love her too. And so do you.”

Plagg didn’t deny it but his tail twitching was all the affirmation she needed. Marinette bent her head to Adrien’s golden head, burying her face in the soft locks. She cried quietly as she held Adrien to her and the sun slowly peeked over Paris’ horizon. Her lip wobbled when she spoke and her voice wavered. “What happened to her? She was fine when I left her.”

She sniffled at the silence before looking up quizzically in confusion. Plagg was looking away, his ears flat against his head, and Marinette was doused in an icy cold torrent that rushed through her. When Plagg met her eyes out the corner of his own, he looked down at Tikki and held her tighter to his chest, his legs curled up to keep her body pressed against his own as they floated in the air. He didn’t say it was her fault but she saw it in the stiffness of his body, the words he couldn’t say screaming in the silence, and Marinette swallowed the acidic, bile taste of bitter regret as she realized that this _was_ her fault.

Sharp, stinging panic dug into her and she felt her body beginning to tremble but Plagg’s green gaze when he looked at her showed no sympathy or pity. Only the bitter truth in hues of steely green and hard yellow. “She broke the Miraculous. To save you.” He shook his head when she opened her mouth, his look firm. “She doesn’t regret it. Tik isn’t that kind of girl. She chose you, Marinette. And Tikki doesn’t make mistakes or mess up all the time like me. And if she chose you, she believes in you. So all you gotta do is believe in yourself.”

The claws of the hissing panic lessened their hold but she felt the harsh icy cold of regret biting at her heart as her eyes fell to Tikki’s still form. Her chest was breathing infrequently and in quietly staggering breaths. All of this because she hadn’t trusted what she had always known: she was Ladybug and she had let down the only person who had never believed otherwise. Her panic and the bitter regret hardened as she lifted a hand to swipe at her tears. When she gazed at Plagg, her eyes were narrowed and bright. 

Blue steel met luminescent green. “I do. And I believe in Tikki. She chose me and I won’t let her down. And….” She took a deep inhale as she told the kwami holding his heart in his arms, “I’m sorry. I did this to her. This is my fault. And I’m sorry.”

Plagg eyed her before a small, catty grin spread over his lips and his gaze softened. His ears twitched slightly upwards as he looked down his nose at her, grin firmly in place. “I see why she chose ya, girl.” Then, the serious cat was gone and Marinette’s eyebrows shot into her hairline when he immediately groaned and threw his head back dramatically. His voice was a whine when he grumbled out, “Why couldn’t I get a Chosen like you? _You_ would give me cheese, I know it! No, instead, I get stuck with goldilocks here who tortures me!”

Marinette had to stifle her laughter in Adrien’s hair, fondly thinking it did resemble strands of gold. Her smile was lighter and though she still felt regret at seeing the consequences of her actions, she felt better than she had before. Her assault was still fresh in her mind and the only thing keeping her grounded was the boy in her arms. He had saved her more than he knew. 

A twinkling whisper echoed inside her heart and she looked up, confusion plastered over her face as she examined the room. Plagg was looking at her curiously – well, more like she was a weird alien he was stuck with – but all she could feel was this _pull_ etched into her that there was something she needed to be doing. It zinged inside of her again and she physically jolted at the sensation. It felt a bit like transforming except the magick was on the inside and pressing into her heart. Blue fell onto Tikki’s red form and Marinette reached without thinking. Plagg jerked her back, eyes narrowed and fangs bared at her approaching hand.

She looked into Plagg’s eyes, pleading. “You can trust me, Plagg.”

Her chest tightened at just how much Plagg had to have been hurt to not trust anyone but himself – but her mind flickered to the soft, tender gazes he sent to Adrien and she smiled. Okay, so he trusted Adrien and that was enough for her. She held out her cupped palm, staring intently into his own gaze, baring her heart to this kwami with eyes that spoke of 8000 years of pain and loneliness. Plagg looked at her outstretched hand, Tikki, then her hand, and finally into her eyes again. He kept the stare a while and neither of them moved. 

Slowly, he stretched out his legs and lowered himself until he was within distance of her open palm before he uncurled his hands from Tikki’s form. He caressed her cheek gently with the tip of his black tail before he settled the red kwami in her hand. Plagg didn’t look at her but he nodded and Marinette pulled Tikki close to her. She closed her eyes and settled her nose against her palm. The edge of her nose touched Tikki’s own, the red kwami’s head cocked to the right and facing her. The red God’s body was still and cool, her colour fading from a dull washed out red to a horrible gray that quickened Marinette’s heart. 

That magickal pulsing inside of her flowed through her body as she cupped Tikki in her palm and took a deep breath. Something inside her whispered, 

She did. She released the exhale through her parted mouth, the breath brushing her sore, chapped lips in a moist warmth. Her eyes opened and widened when she saw the white and red magick dancing in the air, in her _breath_ , as it brushed over Tikki’s body. The magick pulsed above and over Tikki’s form, swirling and twisting, before it dived into the red kwami’s chest in a burst of sparkles that had Plagg darting to Marinette’s shoulder. 

Both kwami and Chosen watched, holding their breath, for a miracle and hoped against hope that this, whatever this was, would save Tikki. As the silence of the room became overbearing and nothing happened, Plagg patted Marinette’s cheek with a paw, his voice defeated and tired. “Well, it was worth a shot. Good try, kid. But somethings just can’t be fixed by luck.”

Marinette turned her head and closed her eyes, willing herself not to break down and Plagg buried his nose against her own, his body trembling. She closed her fingers slightly over Tikki and twisted her other hand in Adrien’s hair. Marinette Dupain-Cheng was no longer Ladybug. 

“…..I don’t need luck when I got Marinette.”

Green and blue snapped wide open and shot frantic heads toward Marinette’s closed hand, her fingers touching her palm. Slowly, she uncurled her fingers and she was sure Plagg had stopped breathing. Hell, she was sure _she_ had stopped breathing. Both waited, their hearts frozen and breath halted, as Tikki came into view. 

Large, expressive blue eyes shone out at them. Her small red paws were flat against Marinette’s hand, trembling from the strain of sitting up. She was sat on her knees, her three pronged tail flat and curled against her side. The red in her body was darker and full of life, her antenna loosely held aloft and hanging near her cheeks. Tiredness was etched into bright blue and the bags beneath the kwami’s eyes proved her fight. Tikki had fought and she had won. Eyes brimming, Marinette pulled the red kwami to her, squeezing her eyes shut when Tikki lifted shaky paws to hug as much of her face as she could.

Plagg huddled against her shoulder and the crook of her neck and if she felt his tears, she didn’t say. Relief flooded her followed by the twinges of guilt that this was still all her fault. Marinette pulled back and opened her eyes, looking down into Tikki’s confused stare. 

Her voice was steadier than the tidal wave she felt inside. This was her fault and Marinette knew it was time to take responsibility. Because of her, Tikki had been nearly killed. If she hadn’t left Tikki alone – how was she ever going to forgive herself for this – then she would have had the power to escape her attacker. She was Ladybug and she was Marinette. It was time to stop running away from who she was. 

“Tikki, I am so sorry. This is all my fault.”

The red kwami’s mouth instantly fell open and Marinette twisted her thumb to press gently against the God’s lips. Tikki’s gaze had narrowed but the kwami remained silent when Marinette removed her thumb. She flashed a grateful smile. “I know what you were going to say. You were going to defend me, which I’m thankful about. But not this time.” Marinette shook her head, black locks loose and brushing her shoulders. “This is my fault. You, me being helpless, Plagg’s pain, Adrien….”

She looked over at his face, then, and there was no denying she had given him hell. He had dark, thick bags under his eyes, a bruise on the underside of his jaw, sweat still dotted his forehead from where she must have fought him in her sleep, and there was no telling what wasn’t visible proof of just how much Adrien had dealt with. But she could see it in the way his grip was still firm as he held her. Even in his sleep, he thought about her first. He was always putting himself in danger, at risk, for _her_. It was time she take responsibility. 

“I can’t imagine I was easy to deal with last night.” She winced but carried on. “But he stuck with me. And you almost died to save me. And I’m sorry, Tikki. Because you deserve a stronger, better Chosen. Paris needs a hero who can, and will, fight for them no matter what is going on in her life. She won’t take advantage of the powers or lie or cheat. She will be good, strong, and she will readily be the hero she needs to be.”

Tikki leaned forward, her distress clear by the frantic twitching of her antenna and the wide-eyed panic searing into her gaze. “But, Marinette –“ Tikki shook her head. Looking up with wet eyes, her pain was clearly reflected. “You’re….Giving up the Miraculous….?”

Marinette took a deep breath and nodded. All the air felt suctioned out of the room, Tikki falling back as if Marinette had burned her. She felt the air from Plagg when he darted forward to hover by Tikki’s side whose wide eyes of betrayal cut deeply. She was focused on Marinette, unable to form words or even look away, even when Plagg wrapped a paw around her shoulders and glared at Marinette with such disdain it would have usually sent her into hysterics. She didn’t feel like that now. All she could feel was a strong sense of pride at what she was saying. Giving the Miraculous to someone else was probably the best choice.

It’s too bad she wasn’t. Her lips stretched into a confident smile that lit up her eyes as she quietly told the two kwami as her sole witnesses, never noticing the green eyes blinking slowly against her chest or the small smile that crossed his face. “I am. Because the Marinette you knew isn’t here any more. I can’t promise to always get it right or be perfect….” She let out a breath through her nose as her voice grew stronger. “But I can promise to do my best. No more doubts, no more running. I’m Ladybug. And this time, when I put the earrings in, I won’t just be Ladybug. I’ll be Marinette, too. Because I’m tired of running away.”

She leaned down and pressed her lips gently against Tikki’s head, lingering there a moment in the presence of the friend she thought she’d lost before she pulled back with bright eyes and that same confident smile in place. “I will be better. I will be stronger. Sometimes, I haven’t always listened when you’ve warned me and sometimes I’ve gone against myself on what I should do and what I want to do. But this time, when I put on the mask and even when I don’t, I’ll do what’s right. Because I’m Ladybug, with or without the mask. And I promise to be the hero I should have been when I accepted the earrings. I promise to be _me_. And I hope that’s enough.”

Her cry rang out before the small kwami darted upwards and nestled herself against Marinette’s cheek, her eyes squeezed shut as big, wet tears sprung at the corners of her eyes. “Oh Marinette! You have always been enough!”

Smile growing and melting from confident to soft and happy, she tilted her head into her kwami’s hug. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Tikki. You’ve changed my life. So let’s do this together, okay?”

“Okay!” Tikki’s voice was filled with her tears and the black cat floated upwards hesitantly, shoulders tense, and Marinette nudged Tikki. She pointed with her eyes at the floating cat who was blushing so red his fur was sticking on end. 

Tikki blinked, cocking her head, and turned. She blinked slowly at the form of Plagg floating there, as if seeing him for the first time before she let out a high pitched squeal that made Plagg’s ears flatten to his head. Wobbly, she flew into Plagg’s open arms and the two hugged tight, their bodies pressed together and erasing the distance they felt when they were separated. Tikki’s happy cries and Plagg’s shaky purr filled the air as Marinette settled back into the bed, tired and drained. Feeling oddly empty, she curled back up into Adrien’s warmth and closed her eyes. Looks like she could do this after all.

“We should talk, Marinette.”

Her eyes snapped open, round and wide, at the voice muffled by her tight hold. For a moment, it didn’t register what was happening. 

Or maybe she couldn’t do this after all.


	9. Guilty Cats and Emotional Roller-Coasters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title of the chapter says it all: guilty Cat, self loathing Adrien. He was almost too late to save her.....Can Marinette save him before it's too late? Emotional roller-coasters. Can Marinette and Adrien handle all the emotions slamming into them or will they be devoured by them, burned alive? The darkness inside of Cat Noir grows. Plagg and Tikki fluff. Also: Plagg does not handle his own sarcastic remarks thrown back at him very well. At all. 
> 
> In the aftermath, what's left?

Bluebell orbs looked at the floor of Adrien’s room, worrying her lip between her teeth and wondering if she should just walk home. But the fear of being outside, alone, with the attacker’s face somewhere out there in the city of Paris was less appealing than sitting on Adrien Agreste’s bed waiting for him to finish his shower. She hid her face in her hands and shook her head as she remembered the events of the early morning hours. Sure, she knew they needed to talk and Adrien would have to wake up _eventually_ but she had not expected the boy to wake up right that second, her mid-conversation with Tikki and Plagg, cuddling him like he was some stuffed bear. 

So she did what she would usually do: she had screamed and shoved him. Marinette had forgotten how close to the edge of the bed she had been and with a squeak had tumbled to the floor, taking the large blue duvet with her. The blanket, a heavy mess that had somehow ensnared and entangled her, had kept her from being able to move even when Adrien had peeked off the side of the bed with a half smile. Those green, glittering orbs had caused her to flush a deep red, but it was as if a switch had flipped. One moment she was a blushing, stuttering mess wrapped in a blanket and the next she had her eyes squeezed shut and heavy breaths to shove back the memories of last night. 

Trapped. She felt trapped, suffocating in the heavy blanket, afraid and fearful that if she couldn’t get out….. But Adrien was her hero, he was her Kitty, and he didn’t give her any time to lament on her assault. He had dived straight off the bed, bare chest and messy golden locks, to pull her into his arms, blanket and all. She should have felt embarrassed, pressed against his bare chest with her palms flat on the smooth, hot skin. Her fingers had dug in slightly, forehead against his neck where she could feel the vibrations of his voice as he comforted her with small sounds and the repeated, calming ‘shh’. 

One of his arms had instantly wrapped tight around her lower back, pressing her to him, and the other arm was against her upper back, his hand carding gently through her black hair. It was familiar and flashes of him holding her in the night, flailing limbs and cries and hard punches, surged through her brain. She took deep breaths, in through her nose, and exhaled through her mouth. When the panic slowly crawled away, heavy weights settled inside her body and she couldn’t gather the strength to pull away. Adrien didn’t let go of her either and the two sat on the floor, the blanket tangled around them and their bodies grounding one another to each other. 

Her eyes had filled with wet tears as she had whispered into his neck, “Thank you.”

The moment had been broken, then, shattered like glass when Adrien tensed, his body stiff and rigid as a stone mountain. Her eyes had opened slowly only for Adrien to jerk away from her as if she had burned him. The motion had hurt her that he couldn’t look at her, his head turned away and expression hard to read. He had grabbed her hands and pulled her, gently, to her feet before he had mumbled he was taking a shower, to wait for him here and they would talk. She had fallen to the edge of the bed, watching him move with jerky, robotic motions, grabbing clothes and heading to the bathroom. The hurt in her chest only tightened when Adrien, not once, met her eyes.

So now she found herself sitting at the edge of his bed with her head in her hands and fighting all the questions swirling in her brain. She looked up dejectedly from behind her fingers at the closed bathroom door, eyes crinkled at the corners as she waited for him. 

“I know he’s hard to deal with but he’s a good kid. Don’t take it to heart.”

The gruff voice came from her right and she tilted her head to face Plagg and Tikki, both kwami looking at her. Plagg was despondent and stoic, arms crossed and tail swishing behind him lazily but Tikki was gazing at her in the exact opposite spectrum of emotion. Her large blue eyes were staring at her Marinette with a mix of pity and comfort, little red paws clasped in front of her chest. Tikki, tired and still healing from her injuries, was sitting on a small table next to the bed where a blue globe stood with Plagg floating not too far above Tikki’s body. 

Marinette sighed and stood, hands falling to fiddle with the hem of the pajama shirt, her gaze glued to the door in hopes Adrien would emerge. “He’s never pushed me away.”

Tikki’s quiet voice was wavering with strain and Marinette turned concerned blue to her friend. Her red body was coated in a slight sheen of sweat and her face, though back to it’s usual ladybug red, had dulled slightly. “He’s dealing with a lot. Everything will be okay Marinette. You two just need to talk and things will be fine, you’ll see.”

Plagg looked down at Tikki incredulously before he shook his head and narrowed his cat-like eyes at Marinette who jumped at the sudden ferocity in them. “You have to go get him!”

Marinette flushed and her mouth dropped open, Tikki mirroring her expression, but it was Marinette who spoke first in a loud screech, “He’s in the shower I can’t just barge in there!”

The feeling of warm skin beneath her hands tingled in her fingertips and she scrubbed them on the silky pant legs to try and erase the feeling, her face burning hot from her blush as she looked down to avoid Plagg’s gaze. 

But the cat was determined as he growled before spitting out, “He’s not taking a shower! He has the water running but trust me! I’m not the only cat here. Adrien is….” Plagg’s voice trailed off slightly and Marinette looked up, cocking her head to the side. Plagg was looking away, slight pink dusting his cheeks. His whiskers twitched. “He’s running away because he felt backed into a corner. Typical cat.”

When those slit orbs focused instantly back on her, Marinette’s breath hitched and she had to swallow past the thick lump in her throat to be able to breathe at the intensity of the stare. “I know you remember. I know neither of you kids wants to bring it up. But for the love of Cat’s, _talk_.” His tail flicked behind him in frustration as his eyes narrowed. “Talk to him. If you don’t go in there, he’s not going to come out. The kid’s stubborn. Besides,” Plagg shrugged. “Tik and I will be here anyway so what have you got to lose?”

Bluebell orbs looked at the closed sliding door then at the two kwami before dropping her eyes to the floor. She wiggled her toes as the sound of the water hitting the tiles filled her mind. The sun outside the wall of the windows was steadily climbing higher into the sky and she knew they would have to head to school at some point. The sun’s rays fell along the floor, barely touching her toes in a gentle heat. She shouldn’t go in there. Adrien clearly wanted space and she wouldn’t admit it but it still stung he hadn’t been able to even _look_ at her. 

He had dived off the bed to comfort her – a thought that sent her heart racing – but then he had just shoved her away. Her hands flew to her arms, rubbing them at the goosebumps that flared to life at the feeling of cold leather holding her against her will. Last night had terrified her, broken a part of her, and she knew she should be afraid of Adrien…..But she had never needed him more than she needed him now. She was never more thankful for his presence than she was last night. Something had shifted between them, inside them, and there was no going back. 

Marinette looked up and met Plagg’s eyes as she squared her shoulders, taking a tiny step forward so her toes were bathed in the sun’s heated light. “I don’t have anything left to lose.”

Spinning on her heels, she walked towards the bathroom door. Her hands fidgeted at her sides, plucking at the pajama pants in nervousness despite her bravado. She hoped Plagg was right as she took a deep breath, slid the door open, and stepped inside the steamy bathroom. She slid the door closed behind her quietly. The steam curled around her body and soaked into her skin, the heat making her body tingle pleasantly. It lulled her into relaxation as her shoulders drooped and she breathed a quiet sigh of pleasure. 

Her bare feet padded forward against the tiled floor as she headed for the large glass doors with the metal gray handles. She raised a hand, settling small fingers into the groove of the handle, and paused. She bit her lip, the steamed glass preventing her from seeing into the wet room but she could feel Adrien’s presence through the doors between them so she knew he could feel hers too. Ladybug and Cat Noir had moments like this, able to sense the other without a word being spoken, and Marinette let her hand fall from the handle of the door.

She took a small step backward and blinked past the throbbing in her head that had begun again to lift her other hand, curling her fingers against her palm as she settled her fist against the glass. Her heart pounded in her chest and her stomach somersaulted as she waited, holding her breath, hoping he would sense her like he always did. She waited even when sweat dotted her forehead and she felt her head was about to explode from the headache, she waited. Her body grew heavy and tired, drained, and the bruise on the left side of her face ached at the warm pressure from the steam.

Hot tears built behind her eyes as she bit her wobbly lip to keep from crying. Just as her fist shook, preparing to fall from the glass, she saw it. At first, she wasn’t sure what she was seeing but when it became clear, a bright smile spread across her lips as she let out a breathy laugh. His arm was there, through the steam. He was there. 

She leaned her head down to her fist, smile bright and toothy and wide as she whispered through the glass, sure he could hear her. “I’ll be waiting outside. We need to talk, so….” She pushed past the tears in her voice. “Don’t hide from me, Kitty.”

She jerked away from the glass and turned around, swiping a hand across her eyes to rid herself of any tears as she headed towards the bathroom door. As soon as she was out of the bathroom, the door closed behind her, she was met with a grumpy Plagg waiting for her. 

“Tik said I had to guard the door so she could sleep. You’re fine. He’s fine. She’s such a worrier…..”

Despite his grumblings, Marinette noticed he kept one ear bent back towards the stand with the globe where she could make out Tikki’s red form lying on a pillow and covered with a multitude of socks. She snorted back a laugh, pressing her lips together, and Plagg rolled his eyes. “That kid owes me a lifetime supply of Camembert for this!”

Nothing could diminish the smile or the warmth inside of her, not even grumpy Plagg who she found to be quite endearing. She lifted a hand to scratch beneath his chin, the cat’s eyes closing as he leaned into her touch, a vibrating purr rumbling through him. “How about you help me make the bed and I’ll watch Tikki while you go to the kitchen?”

She stopped scratching his chin as she moved towards the bed, spotting her clothes on the floor and bending to pick them up. She looked up as she saw Plagg looking down at her, a rather familiar smirk with twin fangs poking out of his mouth. “You know, I think I like you. Kid better marry you or I’ll ruin his life!”

Marinette didn’t have time to scream at the statement as she dropped the clothes to the floor before Plagg winked at her, gave Tikki one last loving look, and darted forwards. He phased through one of the walls and was gone, a bewildered and embarrassed Marinette left kneeling on the floor with her damp, wet clothes a pile at her feet. Blinking with an obvious blush dusting her freckled cheeks, Marinette struggled to regain her composure. Picking up her wet clothes, she looked at the sleeping Tikki as she stood to her feet. Her friend’s little red chest was breathing gently and though her pallor was a bit dull, she was smiling in her sleep and clutching a couple of socks with her red paws.

She smiled, proud of Tikki for surviving and vowing to speak to her about what had happened, before she meandered around Adrien’s room. She picked up the various clothes she found, including his dampened white jacket and the black shirt he was fond of with the coloured lines. Once the clothes were bundled in her arms, a cold wet pile that made her shiver, she headed to the bathroom, intent on putting them in the hamper she had seen inside. Focused on her destination, Marinette didn’t have time to stop when the door slid open revealing a bare chested Adrien with a towel draped over top of his head. 

Their eyes both widened and Marinette squeaked as she stumbled into his chest, her nose smacking into the firm muscles there. Her eyes watered at the pain shooting through not just her nose but her bruised cheek. Adrien tensed, arms hanging at his sides taut with restraint. A roller-coaster of emotions soared inside of her, both weightless and heavy, and with slow steady motions she pulled back. Blue orbs were focused on Adrien’s bare feet, head ducked as she tried to make sense of his sudden tension around her. It was awkward and uncomfortable. A sharp pang stabbed at her heart at the implications that their relationship as not just Adrien and Marinette had changed – but so had Cat Noir and Ladybug. 

Blinking past the moisture building up in her eyes, she pressed her lips together. A shaky hand brushed back her hair behind her ear before she resituated the bundle of clothes in her arms. “I’m sorry, I –“ Her voice cracked and she cleared her throat before trying to speak again. “I was just cleaning up. Then, I guess I’ll go home. Sorry for being a burden, I –“

“No!”

Jolting in surprise, her gaze snapped up to an equally surprised Adrien. His look melted into one of surety and boring holes into her body with the sharpness of a knife. His voice was steady, firm, and she couldn’t tear her eyes away from his blazing green ones. “You are not a burden. I just….” He took a deep breath, chest lifting at the motion, before he lifted a hand to her bruised cheek. The warmth did nothing to stop her wince at the pain that shot through her and watching Adrien’s own face mirror her pain caused a blooming heat to flower inside of her. “I can’t stand to look at the proof that I failed to protect you.”

His whispered confession did nothing to dull the ache of the words themselves. He blamed himself – somehow – for last night. He must have seen her about to retaliate before his hand cupping her cheek shifted to press against her lips. 

He shook his head, a smile playing at his lips. 

“No, Princess. I guess the, uh, cat’s out of the bag, huh?” He looked sheepish with his free hand rubbing the back of his golden locks and that half smile tilting the corner of his lips. 

Blond brows were both raised and furrowed and she mirrored his nervousness but gave him a nod. She remembered and they had nowhere else left to run. It was like being suspended on a tightrope and not knowing if there was a net below to cushion your fall as they met each other’s eyes. If she fell, there was no way to know what waited for her. The truth would either set them free or break them. Marinette had no intention of letting it be the latter. 

She dropped the clothes and raised her hands to the one pressed to her lips. She wrapped small, dainty fingers calloused from years of sewing around his wrist and pulled his hand away. She held his hand in both of hers, letting it hang between them, and tilted her head to the side with a smile. Before, she had always separated Ladybug from herself but now, she didn’t need to. Confidence and strength powered through her, all of her, and she gave him a half-lidded, reassuring look that sent his green gaze into a wide-eyed sort of awe. His mouth parted as if to say something but there were no words. 

They didn’t need them anyway. The truth was there, hanging between them in a fragile thread of rope. It was time to walk the rope and not fear the fall. She took the plunge with eyes open and a smile. “You saved me, Chaton.”

The words rang in her head and a hazy, blurry memory surfaced in her mind of the same words in her voice being said before, muffled by the slight pain in her head that her injuries had caused. Not tearing her eyes away, she got to see the emotions play out across Adrien’s face and she couldn’t have been more ecstatic to see her Cat. Surprise melted into a debate between joking and lying and his entire expression faded into the familiar grin and glowing green eyes she had seen behind a mask a million times. 

He leaned down only a bit, grin in place, and whispered between the fragile air between them, meeting her confidence head-on with his own. “You clawed your way out of this one on your own, M’Lady. But cat’s honor: you’ll never have to do it again.” His expression softened and this Cat was the one she had seen only once: a heartbroken kitty with a single red rose surrounded by little candle flames came to her mind. “I will _claw-ays_ be there.”

Marinette laughed, ignoring the brimming tears in her eyes, and lifted a hand to flick at the tip of his nose. It twitched and he raised an eyebrow at her. “Your puns are atrocious. I can hardly deal with them _in_ the mask!”

Adrien grinned wider and opened his mouth, eyes shinning with what she was sure was going to be a thousand more puns, before she shook her head. Her look softened. “We need to talk, don’t we?”

Playful fell to a serious expression in an instant as he stepped forward and bent to a knee. The position of him on one knee before her sent her heart skidding to a thundering stop as his voice mumbled up to her, “Yeah. We do.”

When she felt she might burst, Adrien stood with the pile of wet clothes and Marinette breathed out a nervous laugh at what she had thought. Stupid Plagg and his mention of marriage! Throwing a confused look her way, Adrien headed into the bathroom and tossed the clothes in a hamper beneath the sink. He padded his way back toward her with narrowed eyes, trying to pinpoint her nervousness. She grinned far too wide and spun around, darting for his bed and beginning to straighten the pillows. As she made the bed, she could feel his eyes on her and she knew, eventually, she couldn’t prolong the conversation. 

She was ready to talk but a part of her was still frightened of what would be left of them afterwards. He knew she was Ladybug and she knew he was Cat Noir but admitting it directly was a whole different matter. They could no longer hide behind their masks: it was exhilarating and scary. She heard him shuffling about and the rustling of clothes while she made the bed. The silence wasn’t as suffocating as before but the tension was tangible almost like a thick blanket hanging over them both. Once the bed was made, Marinette fidgeted and turned to face her sleeping kwami. Tikki was breathing in steady breaths and the sweat had evaporated from her skin.

She had her usual red glow about her, looking much more lively than before. She smiled and lifted her eyes just as the sun rose over the top of Paris. Her breath caught at the beauty of the city she loved. The sun cast light over the tops of buildings, melding with the shadows in an intimate display. It’s rays shone through the entirety of Adrien’s room, heat soaking into her from it’s blinding light. Heat soaked into her bones and from it came a peace that everything would be okay. The sun would always rise in the morning. 

She closed her eyes and hummed at the sun’s warmth. Tilting her head to look back at Adrien, her eyes widened at the look he was giving her. His palms were flat against the computer desk behind him as he held himself up. His legs were crossed at the ankles as he gazed at her. A wistfully dark expression of longing and a weary cautious glimmer. His golden hair glowed in the light of the sun, mirroring it’s brightness. It was still damp from his recent shower and she could see all the shades of gold in every strand of his hair. Those green irises were shining and bright but the dark caution in them had her breath hitching and her shoulders tensing.

He was wearing a loose, unbuttoned white collared shirt and she could make out the small bruises littering his pale skin from her fear. She fought with herself, warring with wanting to give him space and avoid the talk she knew was coming, before turning to face him fully. The heat of the morning beat against her back as she tucked a stray strand of her loose hair behind her ear, looking up at Adrien from beneath dark lashes. He was wearing jeans, clean and fitted, and for just a moment, she wondered where Adrien began and his Father ended. 

Shaking away the thought, she took a hesitant step forward, towards the boy across from her but the weariness in his eyes only darkened. He narrowed his gaze on her, steady and unwavering, and though he wasn’t Cat Noir, Marinette didn’t miss the rippling of the dark beast she had glimpsed last night staring back at her. Oddly, she wasn’t afraid. No matter what darkness may lurk in Adrien or Cat Noir, and no matter what he may become, she knew he would never hurt her. It was a fact just like the sun rose every morning, people needed air to breathe, and the boy inside and out of the mask would never hurt her.

She slid her other foot forward and Adrien instantly straightened, green gaze intent on her own. He wasn’t a monster or a beast but there was something in those eyes she couldn’t place. The emotion flittering in and out wasn’t directed at her though his gaze never left hers. Her mind flashed to a time when she was little, outside the bakery. There had been a black cat – ironic, considering – that had been sitting in the shadows. Little Marinette, of course, had to pet it but no matter how she called, the black cat had sat there and stared at her, cautious and weary.

That same look was reflected back to her but deeper, feral and wild. She looked up, lifting her chin, meeting Adrien’s eyes head-on. Lifting up a hand, she curled her fingers in a slow, gentle motion and clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, near the front of her teeth. Adrien took a single step towards her before a black blur darted between them. Marinette’s eyes widened and she jerked her hand back to her chest with a cry of surprise.

Plagg hovered between them, arms spread out and ears flat to his skull. He was staring Adrien down and a sense of apprehension washed over her as she looked between the kwami and Adrien. “P-Plagg….?”

He didn’t turn to her but his voice was heavy and deep and it caused a shiver to race down her spine. His words froze her blood in her veins. “This isn’t a cat you want to come too close to you, girl. This is what happens with most of those unlucky enough to be stuck with me. But this kid? This kid isn’t anything like the others. He can’t control it but Adrien-Geez, this kid is going to give me a heart attack!”

Plagg’s grumbling calmed Marinette’s trepidation slightly before he continued. “Adrien can’t control it – none of them can. But he _can_ focus it. And do you wanna know where his focus is, how he channels it?”

Marinette blinked in surprise when Plagg looked back at her, expression bleak and tired yet steady and it hit her all at once when glowing slit eyes in a dark alleyway flashed through her mind. She brought her hands to her open mouth and gasped, gaze flicking to Adrien. “No….”

Plagg looked back to Adrien and Marinette could see the world on those tiny shoulders, a heavy burden that passed from kwami to Chosen as Plagg’s mumble left no room for doubt. “You. He channels it, uses it, to protect you. This,” Plagg’s tail pointed toward Adrien who had cocked his head during their conversation, gaze focused on the floating kwami. “Won’t happen unless he’s near you and feels your in danger.

“Or his emotions get the better of him.” Plagg shrugged and darted backwards to a spot just behind Marinette’s shoulder. “I may joke a lot but the kid is like a cat in a lot of ways. You two really need to talk. I mean, me and Tik have communication issues, 3000 years worth of them at least but geez, you two are more difficult than us! Call to him. Call out and he will respond. Cat’s always know the call of the ones we love.”

Marinette’s heart fluttered inside her chest, dancing and twirling inside of her, and her eyes widened at the implication of the words. She opened her mouth but all that came out was a squeak, her mouth too dry and the lump in her throat too large to speak. 

She could feel Plagg’s eye-roll and his exasperation. “He nearly tore apart a human being last night for hurting you, dealt with your cries and your hard as steel punches – seriously, learn to control your strength a little! –, and took care of you. And you’re doubting his feelings? See, people are blind but this is so not my forte.”

Marinette took a shuddering breath and looked back at Plagg’s form. Her voice shook when she spoke. “I just have to….Call out to him, right? And you won’t leave us?”

Plagg floated into her line of sight and his green eyes softened, giving her a firm nod with his tail twitching affirmatively behind him. “Call a cat and they come running. Trust me, girl, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be over there with Tik. I won’t let his grubby claws ruin this. He’s just got a lotta emotions right now, that’s all.”

Plagg hesitated before he darted forward, butted against her jaw, and then he was gone, flittering over to the sleeping Tikki. He kept his eyes on them but Marinette had never felt more nervous than standing in the rays of the sun with Adrien’s stare burning hotter than the sun against her back. It pulled her in, drew her into the flames dancing behind his eyes. Her eyes felt hot but she had no tears left to cry and all she could muster was a hoarse, broken cry. “Adrien!”

His entire body jolted as if sparked by electricity. There was no shock when he looked away from her only a weary acceptance but it was that split second of hesitation before he turned away that she saw the emotion in his eyes. Placing it and naming it, Marinette’s eyes widened as she gazed at the boy she loved with everything in her. 

How dare he? The only warning was a rush before she gathered Ladybug’s strength, drawing in a deep breath. Squaring her shoulders, she stared him down and took an ounce of pride when his shoulders stiffened at the intensity of her look. Clenching her hands into fists at her sides, she stomped towards Adrien whose eyes shot to her in a wide-eyed panic at the ferocity of her approach. She stopped when there was no breath between them and stared up into his surprised face. She smiled and fought back a snort at the fear she could see there. 

She lifted a finger and jabbed it into his chest, smile widening at the wince. “Listen, cat-boy, because we both need to talk. You’re scared, I’m scared. This will,” Marinette’s body tensed at the truth of the words she was saying, her voice softening. “This will make or break us as a team, as friends, as partners. I’m Ladybug. Me. Marinette Dupain-Cheng is Ladybug.”

She hadn’t spoken the words aloud, not in a clear enough mind the last few hours, but now that she had, Marinette felt a sense of euphoria dance through her. A joyful acceptance caused her smile to widen into a grin and her heart to overflow. Her toothy grin relaxed Adrien and he gave her a sheepishly happy smile in return, a bright shining glimmer in his green eyes.

“And you are Adrien Agreste. You, Adrien, are Cat Noir. And together?” She poked her finger into a his chest, once, firmly, and then slowly curled her finger back and lifted out her thumb to point backwards at herself. “We are a team. We are partners.”

Adrien’s eyes were large and his lips twitched into a half grin, half smile. “You’ve sat behind me for 2 years….I mean, we’re blind aren’t we?”

Marinette giggled as she let her hand fall and shrugged gently. “It’s the magick of the suit I guess. You’re just-So different from Cat Noir.”

His smile fell and Marinette blinked in confusion when his eyes darkened before he looked away from her. Adrien was smiling the smile he smiled everyday of his life and way too often: forced and fake. Her smile faltered as she thought back on her words to figure out what she said that had caused the tension surrounding them. The air between them was thick and suffocating, slithering into her body like a snake. He kept his head turned to the side, not meeting her eyes, and Marinette’s chest hurt when he wouldn’t look at her. They had been through so much and he had saved her but the fact he couldn’t look her in the eye was painful. 

The tension around them was sharp and heavy, a painful ache in her stomach making her feel sick. Her head pounded and a moment later, a blinding pain shot through her jaw and up the side of her bruised face. She gasped at the pain, her eyes widening at the gentle touch against the sides of her jaw that tilted her face upwards. Breath catching in her throat, her eyes met green as those eyes gazed at her injured flesh. That elusive emotion that had tainted the air with tension was there, buried in his gaze. 

His palms were gentle and warm on the skin of her jaw and his fingers caressed the back of her neck gently. His eyes swirled a compassionate green that caused a comfortable heat to bloom in her heart as she raised her fingers to grasp his hands. He dropped his gaze to her slim, needle-calloused fingers before darting back up to her own. Warmth flared to life between them like a fire glowing tall and bright, it’s flames shooting heat throughout her blood. Cheeks darkening and breathing heavier, Marinette looked into those eyes overflowing with a guilt that nearly choked her. Her fingers clenched into his palms as her eyes brimmed with unshed tears.

“Oh Chaton.” Gently, her fingers pried his away from her face but she didn’t expect his hands to twist and clasp her own in a firm grip. His broad palms held tight to her own as his eyes gazed down and not into her but _through_ her like she was transparent glass. 

She inhaled sharply when he took two cautious steps forward leaving no space between their bodies. The heat and the tension between them swirled together, sparking and turbulent. A rift of laden awkwardness flowing through them at the proximity and the unspoken words lingering between them. His green pools hooked her and she unconsciously found herself leaning closer, the heat from his body melting into her own. Flashes of light memories soared through her mind of Adrien’s heady scent, Cat Noir’s glowing green orbs, and the familiar heat of his body coursing between them like a river.

This boy had risked everything to save her so there was no way Marinette was going to let him guilt trip himself. If there was one thing she had learned about last night it was this: she didn’t need a mask to be Ladybug and it wasn’t Ladybug she was. She was learning that all the qualities Ladybug possessed, she already had. _Marinette_ was strong, brave, and courageous. It was Marinette who wore the mask and it was Adrien who wore the mask of her partner, someone she trusted infinitely, and someone she was just now realizing had always held her heart. 

It was with this conviction flowing through her like the waves of an ocean that she stared up at him, both Marinette and Ladybug. “Chaton, listen to me. Just listen. No speaking!” 

She raised her eyebrows and her lips tilted upwards in a half smile, playful, and Adrien – her sweet, playful kitty – pressed his lips together and sent her a wink that sent her heart fluttering like a butterfly up towards the Sun. 

Smile light, Marinette took a deep breath. Her heart pounded against her rib cage. There were no masks, no identities, no secrets, no _walls_. What she was about to say, and his responses, could either ruin everything they had or build it up higher, stronger, better. With everything in her, she hoped it was the latter.

“You’re my partner. You. Adrien Agreste is Cat Noir, Paris’ legendary hero!” She saw the flicker of doubt the moment it flooded his eyes and her fingers tightened against his own as her smile fell to a more serious pitch. The silence around them was deafening, to the point she could hear everything including their hearts beating inside their chests. “And knowing that Adrien is Cat Noir, for me…...”

Swallowing thickly past the lump in her throat, her mouth wet with nervousness, Marinette whispered into those doubt, guilt laden eyes, “It’s the best thing I could have ever hoped for. Because it’s _you_ who are Cat Noir, you who wear the mask. I’m just now figuring that out myself.” She giggled sheepishly, smiling hesitantly into those green orbs that were focused with such an intensity as if he needed her words to live. It gave her strength to say the words she knew he needed, the words a red kwami had said to her, words she had discovered in the heat of terror. “You, Adrien, are the carefree, loyal, funny, and _highly annoying_ partner that I not only trust with my mask but outside of it.

“You are brave and smart. I hate your puns.” She ignored the playful gasp, seeing the walls fall between them as the Sunlight was finally allowed to hit them from behind the stone walls that had been erected around them. They had become buried by the secrets and the lies. The sun was turning the lies to soil and from that soil, something sweeter and softer flowed between the cracks. “But they’re hilarious and I wouldn’t want a single fight without them. You are reckless and you make me worry ceaselessly because I’m afraid one day you’re going to get in trouble and I-” She froze, jaw tightening and eyes glistening over. “I wouldn’t know what to do without you. Adrien and Cat Noir are the same person. They’re _you_.”

She took a shaky breath, words building up inside of her and spilling out of her mouth like a waterfall. She couldn’t have stopped them if she tried. There was too much emotion and too many words for it all. All she knew was she had to erase that guilt in his eyes, that doubt, that he was anything less than perfect. 

“And you saved me, last night.” He opened his mouth and she raised an eyebrow, reminding him of his promise. He hesitated, eyes crinkling as he debated if his promise meant more than the words curdling his lips but he sighed through his nose before his mouth slowly closed. She gave him a grateful nod and a small smile in return. “You saved me not from the villain this time but something worse. You saved me from _myself_. My pain, my terror and my fear, my doubts…..You blew them all away. As Cat Noir, you were there when I needed you, you –“

Cat’s recklessness broke through and Adrien’s self loathing shout shook her to her core, “I wasn’t there! I didn’t save you, I was almost too late! I –“

Marinette jerked, hard, on both of his hands and almost sent his face slamming into hers but the reflexive cat only wobbled a moment before he righted himself, blinking down at her with his head tilted like an offended cat being shoved away after promised affection. She snorted at the analogy before she shook her head. Adrien grimaced, his green pools swimming with his desire to both finish his sentence and listen to her, keep his promise. But Adrien was loyal. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. When he opened them, they were dark with the turbulent guilt and loathing but he nodded.

Marinette didn’t waste any time, sure of the words she was speaking, her soul still shaken from Adrien’s outburst. “I needed you and you were there. I would have fought as hard and long as I had to because I _knew_ you would be there.”

It must have been the confidence of her body, head tilted up and shoulders squared back, or the self-assured trust that he would save her but her words physically jostled Adrien. His eyes widened and his body went lax, even his firm grip on her hands loosened. She held tight, keeping him centred and focused on her. 

It was so quiet in his room that even the chirping of the birds seemed like it was echoing. The air was palpable and sweet, curling around them and pulling them closer, but also thick with emotion that could suffocate them. The quiet only made her words have more impact. “I knew you would come. I knew all I had to do was fight and you would save me. And you did. You didn’t win my battle for me, Adrien, and I’m glad you didn’t. I _needed_ that.” 

Her voice broke as she tried to convey what she needed him to know, that this experience was _not_ his fault. But that she had needed it to grow stronger, to know what she now knew without a doubt. She couldn’t shake the waver in her words but the strength behind them never faltered. “I wish that I had taken a different way home. Or that I had called someone. Or something! But I didn’t. That was my fault. But that boy attacking me….That wasn’t my fault. I know that, but-But I won’t be able to stop seeing his face in the darkness of Paris’ streets or in every face I see that I don’t know. I won’t be able to run or hide because I don’t even know _who_ I’m running from! But if you hadn’t been there, if you hadn’t saved me….” Her eyes shimmered with tears and Adrien’s hands tightened around hers instinctively, his face crinkled in concern and sympathy. His shoulders tightened and Marinette pushed through the next words.

“I wouldn’t even be alive. You saved me, Kitty. I owe you my life, like I’ve always done. And I know I can trust you to be there for me, every time, whenever I need you. Mask or not. Because you are Adrien _and_ Cat Noir. I – Eahk!”

Irises completely wide, she was caught off guard by the sudden jerk. Adrien’s hands had suddenly tightened on her own, jerking her forward and into a tight clutch. His hands found purchase encasing her entire body, head nestled into her shoulder and her neck. The breath ghosting over the bare skin of her neck caused her to shudder in the cage of his hold. 

He took a shaking inhale that sounded laboured as he mumbled into her skin, “I don’t know what I would have done if I’d lost you. I was so close, so close…! And all I wanted to do was hunt him down…..” His voiced darkened, becoming heavy with the desire she had seen lacing his eyes that night. Those predatory orbs sent a shot of fear – not of him, _for_ him – through her. Subconsciously, she wound her own arms to grip at his back, resting her head against his chest. “I was terrified, Mari.”

By the quaver in his voice she knew he was telling the truth and the fact someone was scared for her made her bite her lip, worrying the flesh between her teeth as she closed her eyes and leaned into the heat of the body that was bringing her back to life. “Without you, Adrien, I wouldn’t be able to open with my eyes screaming. You chase the nightmares away. I’ll be okay. Because of you.” 

She pulled her arms back to her front, placing her palms against the skin peeking out of his open shirt and pushed. His hold loosened enough for their eyes to meet again and she smiled, her bluebell pools glimmering bright. “And because of me. But if you ever feel like this is your fault again, I will declaw you.”

His eyes widened while a slow, broad smile splashed across his face. She rolled her eyes but it did nothing to hide the small pink dusting her freckled cheeks. His voice, when he managed words, was incredulous yet laced with elation. “You-You just…..Made a pun…...”

“Yep, that’s my boy alright.” A muffled voice spoke up followed by a loud ‘ow’ and the sound of something smacking something else.

Marinette blinked back to the present, realizing she was actually still in Adrien’s room with their two kwami. Simultaneously, the two turned to face Adrien’s bed. Perched on the edge on his stomach wearing a sly grin was Plagg. His long tail curled around the red form of Tikki next to him, holding her up. Smiling, Tikki’s large eyes were tired but bright as she looked at them. One of her paws was holding Plagg’s and Marinette’s heart fluttered at the sight. 

Grinning wide, she nodded towards their joint hands. “When did that happen?”

However, despite his embarrassment, Plagg was quick at comebacks and twitched the end of his tail at them. “Could ask the same for you, Princess.”

At first she didn’t notice the weight or warmth. Tensing at the weight of a hand on her hip, wrapped around her back, she hesitantly looked to her right. The moment her blue met green, she was caught by the emotions tossing in those orbs. The heat from his hand burst at her hip and spread through the rest of her like wildfire. Her heart pounded as she stared up at him and it stuttered to a stop when he lifted his other hand to her cheek. Slowly, his body turned towards hers, the back of his knuckles caressing her hot cheeks. When her mouth parted open, Adrien’s eyes fell to her lips and Marinette’s stomach jumped. He wanted to kiss her. Adrien Agreste wanted to kiss her. And she wanted him to.

The feel of cold, harsh lips against hers haunted her. She could still feel the chapped lips of her captor pressed against her own as she wiggled to try and free herself, the wet slimy tongue that had prodded her mouth in short bursts. Those memories haunted her, still, and Adrien could erase them. She wanted him to. Leaning closer, her eyes fell half closed and she saw him tilt his head. He drew closer to her, his breath flowing across her cheeks. So close, just a little bit more…..

He stopped and she opened her eyes in confusion, blinking. Adrien looked at her like she was a fragile and tender girl who needed protection, a look that made her swoon and burn with anger at the same time. “I won’t do that to you. I want to respect you.”

It was a sweet gesture but she wanted him to kiss her so she leaned her cheek into the knuckles left there in his indecision. “I want you to.”

Her whisper slammed into him with a wince. Eyes darkening, his knuckles turned until it was his fingers caressing the back of her ear, his palm pressed against her jaw. His voice when he spoke was hoarse and strained. “I want to. But I won’t.”

Marinette glared at him but his smile remained, soft and gentle, that same infuriating look plastered on his face. Debating whether she could pull him down for a kiss anyway, she paused when she saw the glimpse of a light emotion dancing in the green fields that were Adrien Agreste’s eyes. It was small but when she caught it, all her anger dissipated. It was replaced by a sweltering ache for the boy in front of her, his desire and his need clear in his eyes. Respect. He respected her enough to give her time, something she – hesitantly – knew she needed. Pushing past the emotions clouding her throat, she leaned forward.

Her head fell against his chest and he wrapped the hand that had been on her cheek around her shoulder gently. His chin settled atop her black hair as the Sun’s warmth fell over them. 

“Thank you.” She whispered.

His hand on her shoulder tightened in response and for a while, they stood there in silence, enjoying the moment. Marinette peeked from the side at the two kwami nestled together and her smile widened. Nose to nose, eyes closed, the two were the perfect balance. Tikki’s bright, vibrant red was stark against the black of Plagg’s fur. She lifted a hand to tap Adrien, nodding with her head to the two kwami on the edge of his bed. Twisting his head to tilt his cheek against her hair, he looked over their way and she could feel the smile stretching his lips. 

“That’s my boy.”

The indignant shouting from Plagg was well worth it.


	10. Forgiveness, Parental Chats, and A Slow Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tikki and Marinette forgive and forget, vowing to forge their future together and fix the Miraculous. Is that possible? And is it possible for a phone call to ruin everything built up until this point? When Marinette's parents call and she answers, the heat between the two of them might just leave them both burned. Marinette jumps to conclusions, Adrien is in denial, Plagg and Tikki are so done with their Chosens, and it's finally the moment we've been building up to: will the fire between Adrien and Marinette sizzle out? Or will it burn them both alive, leaving nothing in it's wake but ash? 
> 
> Stay tuned and find out in this chapter of: Cataclysmic Rebirth! ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I have to personally say is........FINALLY!! Sorry the updates are a bit slow but I'm still here and still writing! :) I want to thank everyone who reads my stuff. You guys are the reason I am here! So kudos to you as readers. <3 And thank you. Enjoy!

Marinette’s heart felt light as she watched the banter between Plagg and Adrien. It was oddly like watching brothers argue over something stupid – though Plagg was definitely winning judging by the blush on Adrien’s face and it made her curious as to what was being said. The quick glances at her by both of them did nothing to ease the butterflies in her gut that remained after the embrace and emotion thick words that had been said between them. But she could see the shatters of the stone wall that had been there. In the rubble was a small spot of green, something small and sweet, that she knew would grow to be something beautiful. 

“Adrien is good for Plagg. I haven’t seen him like this since, well, forever!”

Watching the playful air around the two, Marinette had to agree. They were good for one another, a certain joy blooming inside just at watching them. The wide smile on Adrien’s face may have helped. “Together, they make a great Cat Noir.”

Out the corner of her eye, she saw Tikki happily smiling and swinging her legs as she sat on Marinette’s shoulder. Black caught her eye and she flushed as she looked down at her new attire. A black t-shirt that was a foot too long on her smaller frame and black leggings with a tie that was holding them on her hips. Glancing up from beneath her black eyelashes, she caught sight of the large, Cat Noir grin over Adrien’s lips and her heart plummeted before soaring inside of her like an eagle diving into a canyon only to rise again. His smile made her feel safe, pushing her worries and the horrible memories to the back of her mind. He was the Sun chasing shadows and she the Earth that revolved around his warmth. 

A giggle that was both breathy and bright brought her attention back to the kwami perched on her shoulder, looking up at her with a coy smile and lidded blue eyes. “Marinette, you’re drooling.”

Squeaking, she swiped at her mouth. Embarrassed to find a small wet patch next to her lips, she hastily flushed and looked at her bare feet, curling her toes into the sole of her foot. “Not my fault Adrien is the Sun.”

She looked up when Tikki laughed. Her kwami’s expression of coyness melted into fondness and she gave Marinette’s neck a small pat in encouragement. “You’re doing well. I’m proud of you.” Looking into those wide, expressive orbs Marinette found that same pride glittering inside, burning her cheeks at it reflected from Tikki; the kwami she had let down. “I’m always proud of you. It’s okay Marinette. I forgive you. I always would. Can you forgive me?”

Incredulous, she shouted, “Why would you even ask that!?”

Slapping a hand over her mouth, her eyes shot towards Adrien and Plagg. They were both blinking, in cat-like slowness at her, questioning and curious. She chuckled nervously and gave a small hesitant wave before turning her head back to Tikki and ignoring the two confused stares she could feel burning into the side of her head. Her hair had been pulled back into a loose bun at the nape of her neck and her skin tingled at the pair of green pools she could feel lingering on her. Tikki’s wide, knowing grin didn’t help her forget, either. 

“Because I should have known how you felt. Last night was no one’s fault, Marinette.” Feeling the doubt rolling off her Chosen in waves, Tikki turned her scolding look to Marinette’s bluebells, face stern and firm with seriousness. “It was a horrible accident, a twist of bad luck. You got away without me. Sure, would have been easier with me and I’m only going to say this once: don’t leave without me. You need me and I need you. But you did get away. You will be okay. You’re building yourself up from fear. For that, I’m proud of you.”

Her lips pinched at the swelling of emotion caught in her chest and her throat as she looked at Tikki’s red form. Bright red and not the horrible gray with black streaks she remembered from that morning. Bright, blue expressive eyes open if not a bit tired and wrinkled at the corners from stress. Her smile was small but happy, red legs swinging up and back against Marinette’s shoulder. Her drooped antenna were slightly more lifted, the ends still dangling off to the side. Her three pronged tail was straightened out behind her, drooping slightly off Marinette’s back. 

Tikki’s words pushed a memory forward and Marinette felt confidence sear into her as she shook her head. Head cocked to the side, Tikki looked up at her in confusion. “I didn’t get away without you. You were there. I saw you, Tikki, and I remember.”

Gaze downcast, Tikki’s feet slowly came to a halt as she refused to meet Marinette’s probing gaze. She already knew what she would find. Tikki had been there that night. The proof was waiting for her at home in broken earrings and the image of a humanistic Tikki visiting her in the moment of her terror. Those expressive eyes were stuck in her mind as she lifted a finger to turn Tikki’s face back towards her. 

Feeling her visage soften, Marinette smiled as softly as she could. “I love you too. I will fix your earrings, I promise. And I will never take them out again. I promise I will be the hero you believe I am. Because I,” Her lips pressed together as embarrassment flooded her. “I _want_ you to be proud of me. As Marinette _and_ Ladybug.”

The little red God wasted no time in shooting upwards and throwing her arms around Marinette’s nose to her cheeks, nuzzling her nose into the tip of Marinette’s. Large eyes squeezed shut with tears hanging at the ends, Tikki left no room for argument. “I am, always. We will get through this, all of it, _together_.”

Marinette smiled at the encouragement, closing her eyes and giving Tikki’s small nose a bump with her own. The kwami’s small giggles filled her stomach with bubbles of joy and she felt her smile widen. Turning to face the bedroom, she stood to her feet with Tikki’s paws gripping the shirt to keep her balance. She looked back at the white couch she had been sitting on and over at the King size bed. Cheeks flushed and heart pounding, she spun away and clumsily stepped toward the wall of windows to look out over Paris. From up in the mansion, behind the windows, all she could see was a metal and glass prison.

The glass showed her what she could never have while she was left in here, in this large room with everything a teenager could want, but no one to share it with. And her heart leapt into her throat at the image of Adrien sitting in this room, sitting on his bed alone, no one to entertain him and no one to talk to. Spinning around, she turned away from the window and faced the room. Except her view was blocked by a very lean muscular chest hidden behind a light blue shirt with sleeves that buttoned at the elbow. Her gaze drew upwards until it met the amused face of Adrien Agreste, smile lifted fondly. 

Her heart pounded in her chest and she could see Tikki’s wide eyes out the corner of her eye at the heat that flared to life between them. It wasn’t suffocating or sexual nor demanding; it was a gentle, flowing sort of warmth that flared to life any time they were in proximity of each other. She wasn’t sure what it meant and she couldn’t find it in her to care when Adrien was giving her such an amused, fond look that sent her heart galloping through her body. Just when she felt it might burst and Adrien leaned closer, a shrill jingle interrupted the bubble surrounding them.

Adrien blinked in confusion, head swivelling around for the sound and Marinette shook her head affectionately at him. If he had ears, they would have been twitching for the noise. Moving away from him and the pull of the heat, she searched for the noise as it rang a few bells inside her mind. Tikki was still perched on her shoulder when she let out a loud wail, hands raising to her hair in realization. Squeaking, Tikki went flying off, darting somewhere into Adrien’s room as Marinette scrambled to find the source she now knew was the ringing of her phone.

A very familiar, set ringtone that signalled if she didn’t answer, the police would be out looking for her. Throwing things around and shuffling things on Adrien’s desk, she searched for the noise and nearly fell into the door when she ran for the bathroom, realizing the ringing was echoing off tiles. Sliding the door open and in haste, she fell forwards, hitting the tiles with a thud. Her head and her bruised jaw jostled in the fall, causing pain to rocket into her, slamming into her body like red hot knives. Head throbbing and jaw aching, she reached for the source of the sound as she used the black marble drawer to pull herself up into a sitting position. 

She had just sat up and jerked her phone out of Adrien’s pocket – when and why was it even in there!? – when said boy barrelled into the bathroom, leaning on the doors and panting with wide, frantic eyes. A black form was being held by his tail by Tikki who had found purchase on Adrien’s shoulder to keep the cat God from plummeting to the ground.

She opened her mouth to assure him she was fine, just a tumble, when her phone picked up it’s incessant ringing. She immediately looked at the screen to confirm her suspicions. It read ‘Dad’ with a green answer button to slide left and a red hang up button to slide right. Sliding the green button to the left, she pressed the phone to her ear and greeted her Dad. “Papa.”

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng! You are grounded! For one week! No, three weeks! No, for the rest of your –“

There was a loud shuffling noise and some muffled voices before a loud whack made her wince. The next moment, her mother’s voice filtered in, calm and steady. “Hello, xīngān bǎobèi. Marinette, tell Adrien we need to see him to thank him for taking such good care of you. He didn’t say a lot, don’t worry.”

There was a pause and Marinette couldn’t hide her shaky breathing or the sobs welling up in her throat. Her mother’s voice was always calm and gentle in her memories and even now she could hear the strength in the woman who loved her coming through but the strain in it broke her in ways she hadn’t imagined. All the shock, fear, and pain rolled back through her, gently, and all she suddenly wanted was her mother’s comforting embrace. When she was a little girl, her mother used to hold her and read to her before bed. She had lived for those hugs, those precious moments of her mother’s presence, and she hadn’t realized how desperately she had needed her mother until she heard her voice. 

Sabine Cheng was a strong woman and to hear the strain of her voice, trying to comfort her daughter, made Marinette’s heart break. She was responsible for this. And it was time to own up to it. “I’m sorry, Maman, I’m so sorry. I’ll explain everything I promise. I,” Her voice broke and she only had a second before Adrien was crouching next to her, wrapping an arm around her trembling shoulders. Not caring about the aftermath, she leaned against him, her head nestled against his shoulder and his chest, the phone held to her ear. 

“I just really need you.”

She heard her mother’s quiet laugh followed by mumbling in the background. Sabine made grumbling sound, there was a shuffle, and then a loud, deep voice hollered in the background, _”Why are you throwing your shoe at me!?”_

Her father grumbling in the background, Sabine came back to the phone line, her voice just as calm as before she threw her shoe. “I have a hug and a kiss waiting for you. And some lotus tea. Are you around Adrien, now?”

The tone of her mother’s voice implied she _knew_ her daughter was currently being held by the boy. That was impossible but Marinette felt herself blush anyway and looked up at Adrien. Covering the mouthpiece with a shaky hand, she whispered up to green eyes, “My Maman wants to talk to you?”

Adrien shrugged then nodded and Marinette lowered her phone. Pressing the screen, she tapped the speaker icon and held it between her and Adrien before she told her mother, “You’re on speaker, Maman. He can hear you.”

There was another brief pause but this time when Sabine’s voice came through the speaker, Marinette’s hand shook at the waver in her mother’s usually strong voice. “Adrien, thank you. I don’t know what our Marinette would do without you. We owe you her life.” Marinette could hear the struggle of her mother trying not to cry and wanting to bow her head in appreciation, a custom she was still used to from China. “You are welcome at the Bakery, any time.”

Adrien’s arm around her back and the hand on her shoulder tightened, drawing her closer and she looked up at him quizzically. His jaw was set as he gazed at the phone and he had lost his smile. He looked every ounce a cat at that moment that even Plagg, whom Tikki had managed to pull up, had flown to her left shoulder with Tikki nestled against him. All three looked up at Adrien and Marinette traced his features, seeing the man he would become. 

His voice was deep, vibrating through his chest as he spoke. Marinette flushed not just at the vibration of his voice but the words that flew from his mouth. It was Cat Noir speaking. “You don’t need to thank me, Mme Cheng. I, uh, meant to send the text to M Dupain but Marinette’s phone is different from mine, so…..” 

He trailed off and Marinette smiled affectionately at the blush dusting his cheeks and the embarrassed smile he wore. His face lightened from the dark cat and Marinette sent a very clear warning look to Plagg that they _would_ talk about that. The cat God’s face was grave as he sent her a nod back. 

“I’m sorry for the late text. I hope I didn’t wake either of you. But I thought it best to let you know, so you didn’t worry!” 

Sabine’s chuckles were motherly and affectionate. The moment he heard them, Adrien’s entire body relaxed and it hurt Marinette, her heart a pin cushion, as she tried to remember the last time Adrien may have had a hug or heard a laugh from his mother. “No no, merci merci! If not for you, Tom would have scoured all of Paris and burned the whole city down.”

Marinette lifted both hands to cover her cherry red face as she proclaimed in embarrassment, “Daaaaaaad.”

There was a sharp muffled voice – her mother – and then her father’s voice gargled through the speaker of her phone. He was grumbling like a large bear before he let out a deep, heavy sigh. Marinette peeked from behind her fingers at her phone screen, hearing her Père’s deep voice shake, the tension clear in his tone. “You better have kept your hands to yourself.”

There was a loud ‘ow’ and Marinette could see him rubbing his arm and grumbling before he grumbled back through. “Sorry. Thanks.” His voice softened and Marinette’s eyes welled with unshed tears. “Thank you, really, for looking after our little girl.”

Adrien looked just as red as she did and he wouldn’t meet her eyes. “Uh, yes, M Dupain. I mean: NO!” Adrien’s arm around her flailed in front of him even though her father couldn’t see him. It brought a light-hearted feeling to Marinette, her fear and panic abating in the form of her crush acting completely frazzled. “No, I didn’t do anything to her, I swear. I would never hurt Marinette!”

She jolted, those words reverberating in her skull with an echo. She squinted at Adrien, trying to remember when those words had been uttered. She was brought out of her reverie by her Dad’s voice. His tone was less gruff, less deep, a soft, low tenor. “I believe you. Just….Bring her home safe to us.”

There was a shuffle and then her Mom was back on the line, soothing and sweet. “M Dupain and I appreciate everything you’ve done, Adrien.”

Flustered, Adrien nodded then remembered she couldn’t see him and muttered an embarrassed, nervous, “Uh, yeah. No problem. Any time.”

Marinette scooted closer to Adrien’s side, knees tucked underneath her and Adrien’s warm body next to hers giving her strength. She felt tired and achy, her body sore from her fall and her mind exhausted. “We’ll be there shortly, Maman. I love you.”

Adrien tensed beside her but Marinette was too drained to comprehend why. With a wide yawn and fluttering lids, her head fell against his tensed shoulder as her hand holding the phone between them dropped to her lap. She was groggy but still conscious when her mother spoke. “Oui, Marinette. Come home. Adrien?”

He hummed and Marinette’s eyes slipped closed as she turned her head to the side. The smell of his cologne was fresh in her nose. “You can call me Sabine. We’ll see you both soon. Thank you, Adrien. Stop in to see us any time. We’ve got some customers coming in now so we’ll speak more when you get here.”

The click was slow and hesitant. Marinette felt she should have said something but her mind was too drowsy for her to register anything before her mother hung up. Fading into sleep, she was conscious enough to hear the conversation between Plagg and Adrien. 

“I saw that lover boy.” The cat’s voice was sly and knowing and it made her curious. Lover boy? Adrien? With who?

Her heart gave a small painful thump but her body was drifting into sleep and she forgot it moments later when Adrien’s low voice spoke up. “I just remembered something, Plagg. It doesn’t mean anything. I was just there when she said it. She went through a lot and she was too tired to notice. It was a slip-up.”

Plagg snorted and she could see him in her mind’s eye with his tail twitching behind him, arms crossed, and smirk on his face. “A slip-up? Kid, you’ve said a lot of stupid things but that’s the worst one yet. When a girl tells you she loves you, she means it!”

There was a loud gasp of what sounded like recognition and then a familiar voice chimed in. “What!?”

“S’all true! She said it and the stupid boy here is trying to explain how she didn’t mean it. I knew you would chicken out, cat-boy.” 

Adrien’s body tensed, muscles going taut. The muscles beneath his arm where her head rested tightened and she frowned in her tired state, wanting to erase his discomfort. His voice was low and soft. “She didn’t mean it. She was hurt, tired, and scared.”

Her chest grew tight at the low tone of his voice, her mind flicking back to last night in the alley when she stared not into green eyes of her best friend – and crush – but the eyes of a cat stalking the night. 

Tikki’s bright voice piped in, voice levelled and calm. “Have you asked her if she meant it, Adrien?”

“No. And I won’t.” There was a pause and even being half asleep, Marinette could feel the tension between Adrien and the two kwami. “And neither are you. Please, don’t tell her she said it. I’ve just…..I’ve given her the power to crush me. I thought I dreamed it but-when she said it to her Mom just now…..I could feel it. I could feel Marinette’s love for her in her voice, I could feel it in her words.”

For once, Plagg’s voice was quiet and hushed. “So why couldn’t you hear it when she said it to you?”

His body was tight and tense, slightly shaking from the strain of it. Pulled between sleep and waking, Marinette hovered in her mind, curious and conscious. It was Tikki who broke the tension between the two males, but her words sent reality slamming down into Marinette. “If Marinette said she loved you, she meant it. Trust me, Adrien. Marinette would never say something she didn’t mean.”

Panic crashed into her as everything narrowed to those words and suddenly, the conversation made a lot more sense. Sometime last night, she had said she loved him. She had revealed her feelings. Hot tears welled at the corners of her eyes and she swallowed past the burn in her throat as something made itself known. Adrien knew she had said it and he was denying it. If that was true, then, the one thing they hadn’t talked about…..Was her feelings. Her heart broke as she tried to come to terms with the fact that Adrien was avoiding the subject. She could come to only one conclusion:

He didn’t feel the same way. Adrien didn’t love her.

~ * ~

The sun had risen higher in the sky, casting light over Paris and chasing away the shadows but Marinette felt no warmth from it’s light. Her heart was in tatters and pieces in her chest, a thick blanket of numbness shrouding her. The memory had, eventually, come to her after the phone call with her parents. She had told Adrien she loved him, blurted it out in her tired, sleepy state last night…..And he was avoiding it. That could mean a lot of things but all she could see was the horrible truth that Adrien Agreste didn’t love her. He cared about her, the proof in all of his actions, but Marinette yearned for more. She needed more. 

Sighing, she closed her eyes when the wind blew against her skin, cool and pure. She was perched on the metal frame, feet on the inside of Adrien’s room and her back twisted sideways so she could see out over the city. No matter where she looked all she saw was a monster lurking in the bowels of Paris and her broken heart in shattered glass at her feet. With the wind brushing against her skin in a gentle caress, she replayed the moments in her mind. After the phone call had ended, she had opened her eyes slowly. It was one of those moments she had read about in books, the ones you don’t forget because they are so vivid and imprinted in your brain.

The black and white tiles had glared up at her, bright and unforgiving in the rays of the sun from the window to the right. The marble cabinets were shiny, reflecting the light, and Marinette found it out odd how light always found it’s way into the depths of black. Shifting her eyes upwards, she was met with the floating forms of Plagg and Tikki, side by side. Plagg had his arms crossed and body turned slightly away from Adrien. His nose was in the air, haughty, and he gazed down at Adrien with a smug sort of grin that screamed if they had canary, it would have been dead. Tikki’s blue eyes were unusually wide as she looked at Adrien, disbelief carried through them.

Marinette felt the same. Disbelief. How could she have ever hoped for more from this gorgeous boy? Then, she had looked out the corners of her eyes up at Adrien. All she could see from her spot leaning against his shoulder was the underside of his jaw. But she could feel the tension in his body. He was tense and Marinette thought the only thing holding him together was his will power. Time slowed down and she saw the moment he realized something was amiss. She could see his long eyelashes blink in rapid succession before he looked down. 

Their eyes met and in that single moment when time froze, her heart cracked and splintered before it burst apart. It shattered inside of her. All the tiny, sharp shards slammed into her and she cried inwardly the moment she saw he realized she had heard their conversation. His eyebrows came down over his eyes, slightly furrowed. The moment his eyes fell away from her own, time resumed, and he turned his head away. Heart thudding painfully in her chest, Marinette had lifted off of him and their kwami had quieted instantly. A heavy hush fell over the bathroom with Marinette on her knees and looking to one side and Adrien crouched on the other, looking the opposite way. 

She was afraid to meet Tikki’s eyes, see the pity reflected in those orbs. Tension was strung between them, festering an awkward atmosphere. Taking a deep breath, Marinette had lifted herself to wobbly legs with her eyes downcast to the tiles. If she looked up, she would cry, so she didn’t. She kept her head down even when she turned towards the bathroom door. She had placed one hand on the sliding door when Adrien’s voice, deep and rough with emotion, rang through. “I’ll walk you home.”

Marinette could remember every detail about that moment. The way her fingers had dug into the door or how she knew Tikki and Plagg were sharing looks even though she wasn’t facing them. She knew how Adrien was refusing to look at her and the shattered shards of her heart pulsed in pain. Plastering a fake smile on her face, Marinette said in the chirpiest voice she could muster, “It’s alright, you don’t have to. Maman and Papa were only kidding. I –“

The sharp sound of cloth being shuffled snapped her mouth closed. Her rebellious heart pounded in her chest and in her throat at the way she just _knew_ he was standing behind her, staring burning holes into the back of her head. No need to turn around to feel the tenseness still encasing his body as he mumbled, “No, I’ll walk you. Wait for me in my room.”

She could take that step out of the bathroom or she could turn around and step right in front of the body she knew would be there. She could risk it all and turn around, hope against hope the conversation wasn’t what she thought. She could have…..But she didn’t. Instead, Marinette had taken the two steps forward, numb to even Adrien sliding the bathroom door closed behind her. Rooted to the spot, she hadn’t been able to make a single step until Tikki had phased through the door and guided her with gentle words to the windows. 

She had pushed one open, sat on the edge, and here she was still ruminating on the impossible: she hadn’t heard wrong. There was nothing to hear wrong. Adrien had avoided the subject and that said more than any words he could have thrown at her. Soul-crushing despair and mind-blowing pain she expected after the realization but not a numbness that left her feeling empty and blank as she gazed out at a chirpy, bright Tuesday morning. All she wanted to do was go home, lie in her bed, curl up with Tikki, and sleep. Maybe if she slept, she could dream about what could have been if she had only not opened her mouth the night before. 

“You’re doing the Marinette thing.”

The voice was soft and a bit strained. When she glanced to her right and down, Tikki was there in her line of sight and looking out over the sunny Paris. The city shined and gleamed in the wet glimmer from the storm last night – there had been a storm? Marinette couldn’t recall – and Tikki’s shiny blue eyes reflected the light, almost making them seem luminescent. The small kwami’s red skin seemed to glow in the light of the Sun like the scales of a mermaid’s tail. Her tail was thick and poofy, paws on the metal edge and holding tight. Her two red antenna were finally upright and standing tall as she gazed out at the city. 

She blinked slowly and then flicked her eyes back to the rising Sun. “What is a Marinette thing?”

“Jumping to conclusions before you have all the answers.” Tikki’s answer was sure and it irked Marinette, her ire rising and boiling through her blood.

Tikki was sitting there calmly, serene in the morning that Marinette’s heart was crushed to pieces, and for once she reacted like a teenager girl: she took a deep breath…...And yelled. She yelled out over the city, eyes squeezed closed and mouth open in wide yell that echoed out over the buildings. She belted out the ‘ah’ until her lungs burned and her chest tightened, until tears pricked her eyes, and until Tikki shouted her name. 

Panting, Marinette looked at her kwami with shiny eyes, burning lungs, and a broken heart. “I’ve jumped to all the right conclusions, Tikki. Don’t you see!?”

Suddenly, the fire was back and burning through her body. She flew off the window and into Adrien’s room, facing her kwami with a heaving chest and large, round eyes. Tears pricked the corners and she gestured wildly to her body. “Look at me! I’m stupid, clumsy Marinette again! What was I thinking…..That-That Adrien was just gonna fly in as Cat Noir to save Ladybug and would magickally love Marinette in the morning!?”

Tikki darted up frantically but Marinette was long gone into the burning in her blood and the sharp, hot pain in her chest as she tried to piece whatever of her heart was left together. Panicked, Tikki was swaying in the air and Marinette felt she should care about her kwami looking like she’d seen a ghost or the sudden paleness of the red to pink of her cheeks but she couldn’t. 

All she cared about was the pain inside of her and the words flying from her mouth like fiery acid, burning from her gut through her chest and throat before spewing out of her in the form of words. “I did. I did want him to love me, all of me. But Tikki, that’s not going to happen! How could he ever love _me_!?”

She swept her arms wide, trembling, and panted for breath. Her chest was getting tighter but she couldn’t stop. The words that had been building up burst forth from her like a volcano erupting: wild and uncontrollable. “Adrien is so-so-so….” 

Marinette wildly gesticulated with her arms before throwing them in the air and groaning in frustration before narrowing back onto Tikki when her arms fell limply to her side. Fight slowly leaving her, she swallowed past the pain to say, “Perfect. Cat Noir is annoying and a coward, really! He’s reckless, brash, and a bit selfish sometimes. But you know what? He’s also kind and gentle and just as perfect as Adrien. Why? Because they are the same person. I’ll _never_ be Ladybug. And Adrien will _never_ love me.”

Her lip trembled first. Then, without warning, a cold sadness slammed into her and before she knew it, big fat tears were rolling from her eyes. Chuckling humourlessly, Marinette raised her hands to wave at her crying face. “And I will _never_ be anything more than the girl who sat behind him and saved the world with him. I’ll always just be stupid, clumsy, awkward _Marinette_ to the perfect boy who makes ridiculous cat puns in black leather. I’ll always be…..” 

Her voice quieted to a near silent whisper before the waterworks exploded and she buried her face in her hands as her body was wracked with sobs. “ _Marinette._ ”

Her body shook and trembled as sob after sob wailed from her throat, hot tears sliding from her eyes tightly shut. Her fingers had curled into fists that she held to her face, muffling the sounds of her pain and wanting to just disappear into the ground. Both the anger and the sadness had fled, leaving behind only a broken girl with nothing but shattered pieces of her heart at her feet. The sun darkened from what she assumed were clouds rolling in and she would have laughed at the irony that a bright and sunny Spring Tuesday had become roiling just like her emotions. 

A wind that resembled deep breaths blew the clouds in, darkening everything about her. Heat swelled in the front of her body and Marinette squeezed her eyes tighter. The hair on the back of her neck rose. Someone was looking at her. Oh great, Adrien had come out of his shower and now he was going to comfort her like the drama Queen she was with no feelings whatsoever. And she would have to pretend she didn’t love him. 

Sighing, her shoulders dropped wearily as her fists fell to her sides. She sniffled and took in a raspy, gasping inhale at the trembles shuddering her body. She raised a hand to gesture and went to drop it back to her side, swinging it down to her side. She froze the moment her wrist hit something solid and warm that was definitely a body that was _definitely_ in front of her. Her eyes snapped open and dread pooled in her gut the moment she saw the black sneakers with gold butterflies. She had never seen those sneakers before but she didn’t need to to know who was standing in front of her with her wrist slammed somewhere on his shoulder. 

Wearily, she began to pull her hand back but a lightning quick grip snagged her before she could. His pale lean fingers were wrapped gently around her wrist, her gaze drawn to them and avoiding the stare she could feel on her. It was intense, the hairs on the back of her neck raising to her scalp and sending a shiver through her. She didn’t need to see the green storm brewing in those orbs. She swallowed the thick lump down through the moistness of her nervousness. No matter how much she tried to keep her feelings locked away, she had managed to just destroy it in two days. Facing Adrien was not something she would be able to do and smile so she kept her gaze on those fingers around he wrist, hoping he would let her go if she refused to say anything. 

He didn’t. He held her, gently so she knew she could pull away, and waited silently. Not sure if he was expecting her to fly off again, Marinette blinked back tears, her eyes hot and searing. Her mouth trembled but she parted it to speak. She snapped it closed the minute Adrien growled, the sound deep and rough in his stomach. 

Clearly, he didn’t want her to say any more. Probably didn’t want to hear any more about her love for him that he didn’t return…..Marinette was about to tug her hand back when his voice, low and guttural, calmly broke through her self-deprecating thoughts. “Is that a bad thing?”

Perplexed, Marinette looked up with hesitancy and apprehension. She wasn’t sure what she expected to see or what she expected to happen but she had not prepared herself enough for either one. Eyes widening, she tried to pull away but his grip on her kept her close to him, close enough to feel as if they were skin to skin even with their clothes on. Face pale, Marinette looked into the green pools of striking fire that blazoned into her own. 

Each shattered piece of her heart thundered in her chest at the look. “W-What….?”

Green narrowed into her own and his grip on her wrist curled a bit tighter. “Is it such a bad thing,” She was not prepared for his face to lean down into her own. Her breath caught at the proximity, shoulders tensing. “Being Marinette?”

His warm breath danced across her face, the words – her words – ricocheting into her chest like a tightly strung arrow: Adrien’s aim was, like the rest of him, perfect. Eyes watering, she whispered, “What’s _good_ about it?”

There was no answer she had been expecting or would have been good enough but she was still surprised when Adrien responded. His heat burst into a fire that coiled around her and drew her into him. Her lips parted, body sparking to life at his next words. “Marinette is clumsy and shy. She always stutters around me and sometimes, I don’t even think she speaks English. But,” Adrien’s gaze bored into her, daring her to deny him. “She’s also a very righteous person, very caring, and since we’re on the subject, let me tell you how _feel_.”

The last word was a growl that sent her broken heart racing, gasping when Adrien suddenly dropped her wrist. His eyes were still narrowed and his breathing was heavier, shoulders drew up to his ears. His body was drowning in tension when he flung his arms out, sending her jumping into the air with a squeak. 

Heart pounding and hands clutched in front of her chest, Adrien’s gravelly voice shouted at her, “I can’t maagickally love you. Magick can’t make me love you, Marinette.”

The silence was deafening and Marinette’s breathing stuttered but Adrien didn’t give her any time to recover. His rough, low voice continued to shout. “I didn’t magickally love the girl I woke up to.”

She wasn’t prepared so when Adrien stepped closer to her, bringing their bodies together again, she instinctively stepped backwards. Those eyes. They were the same as last night: a predator stalking it’s prey and this time, _Marinette_ was the cat’s prey. Her stomach shuddered at the intensity in his eyes, his feet making no sound as he stalked forwards, pressing her back until her back hit the cold metal of his computer desk. Before she could run, he leaned over her with his hands resting on flat on the desk. He was so close their noses touched as he stared intently at her. He soaked into her, the heat of his body scorching her skin and burning through her blood like molten lava. Dizzy from the intensity of him, Marinette tried to pull backwards but she had nowhere left to run. The absolutely Cat Noir-ate-the-canary grin that stretched his lips both excited and frightened her, sending her heart into a flurry. 

He inhaled softly and something dark clouded his eyes, something that felt like hot glue inside her chest. His voice did nothing to soothe her anxiety. “I didn’t need magick to love the girl I woke up to. She’s had it, she’s paw-ways had it.” 

The slithering, heated darkness in his eyes softened, making his green orbs sparkle and Marinette couldn’t have breathed even if she remembered how to. “A-Adrien….What-What are you….Saying?”

His Adam’s apple bobbed with the motion of his swallowing, his cat-like grin never wavering. Marinette’s blood thrummed though her veins like fire and the magick of Ladybug: powerful and bright. Her heart was pounding hard against her ribs, the motion almost painful. The injury in her head was pumping in a numb sort of pain that this – whatever this was – was happening. The next words out of his catty mouth would be it: the moment she would know his true feelings. And damn it, she didn’t want to get her hopes up but she was so tired of not believing for just _one_ moment, that Marinette was enough. 

Her lips slowly creaked upwards into a smile, teeth showing, and eyes misty with tears and crinkling at the corners from her smile. Her smile fuelled Adrien and his tongue darted to lick at one of his canines, her eyes bravely following the motion with a dark blush before her eyes snapped back to his. There was that look again, the one that said Cat Noir had caught his prey and was about to devour it? Oh, wait, that was her…..

He leaned close until their lips were almost touching. She could feel his breath dance over her own lips, making them tingle pleasantly. The heat of his body radiated from his green pools that were tossing her against the currents of emotion roiling through them. His chest was firm and lean against the palms of her hands – when had they gotten there!? – and she felt her fingers twitch to hold the fabric of his shirt when he leaned in close, wanting to pull him forward and close the distance. To hell with propriety, Marinette wanted Adrien to kiss her, whether he loved her or not. She wanted him to help her _heal_.

When Adrien spoke again, though his lips weren’t touching hers, she could feel the tingle zipping into her own lips at the movements. His words, however, shattered not just her heart: Marinette.exe completely and utterly stopped working. “I’m saying,” He licked his lips, tantalizingly slow, still grinning. “Do you remember that first day? The day we first became heroes? When we first put on the masks? Well, I guess it was the day after….Do you remember what I _said_?”

Marinette was numb to everything around her, a sort blank bliss spreading into her frozen limbs as she mumbled with wide eyes, “Uhh…..That Paris needed us.”

He snorted out his nose and raised a single, blond eyebrow. He was half grinning now, mockingly, but his eyes glittered: time to strike the final blow. “I said,” He leaned a fraction closer. “That I,” Her eyes fell half closed and just when she thought he would kiss her, the very tip of their lips touching, he pulled back a fraction more. “Loved the girl inside _and_ outside the mask.”

Her brain pounded along with her heart, gut spinning at the implications of his words. Her feet trembled and her sore ankle protested at holding her weight but Adrien had their bodies pressed so close together, there was no escape. If she fell, she would only fall into him and somehow, she realized that was probably what he wanted. She stared up at him, unable to formulate a response against the way his words sparked life into her. 

Adrien’s entire countenance softened. Shoulders loosening and elbows unlocking, his grin melted into a small, fragile smile while his eyes sparkled dangerously beneath golden hair that was glowing from the Sun hitting it. The tension dissolved and the previous scorching fire moulded into a slow burn that tingled her spine, pooling into her gut. 

Raising one hand to her face, Adrien brushed his knuckles softly against her bruised cheek before he gently let his warm palm cup the side of her face and the underside of her jaw. She was slack to his will and when he next spoke, lightning struck her through her skull all the way to her toes down to her very bones. 

“ _You_ are perfect, as Marinette and Ladybug.” He closed his eyes a moment, braced himself, then opened them again. Marinette’s spine tensed, hanging on the precipice of Luck. “And I love you. Both of you. _All_ of you.”

For the first time since she had known him, Adrien’s eyes glared out his embarrassment: a dark red blush dusted his cheeks and his ears, running right beneath his eyes. Those green orbs were focused intently on her, watching her, waiting on her. Who was she to keep her Prince waiting? He must have saw what she was planning because, gentleman he was, Adrien back-peddled quickly, stumbling, as he tried to back away from her. Marinette flung herself forward, fast as a viper snake lashing out, and dug her fangs into _her_ prey. 

She shot out both of her hands to Adrien’s face, stopping his backwards stumbling walk, and jerked his face down to hers. Just as her eyes fell closed, his lips met hers. Everything else faded away. Her body pulsed with a sparkling happiness that bubbled through her and spun silk through her veins. Weightless, falling, vertigo, bubbling happiness, heat searing her gut in a dance of desire and joy. There was so much to feel her body was overwhelmed with it all but the moment Adrien’s lips touched hers, a different kind of magick burned into her. 

His soft lips were minty and slightly bitter but the feel of Adrien’s lips on hers burned away the memory of her first kiss like a burning photograph: the edges were fraying black. When his arms hesitantly wrapped around her waist, she was not prepared for him to press her to him and lift her off the ground. He spun them, her smile dancing into their kiss, and when he stopped Marinette thought he would pull back and scold her for being brash. 

He kissed her back and the embers in her gut exploded into a burning wildfire. His arms around her suddenly burned, etching the feel of them into her skin. His soft lips were firmly pressed against hers, Adrien’s golden hair tickling her cheeks as he tilted his head to press harder against her own. She let him. She let him have everything because somehow, Cat Noir was Adrien Agreste and Adrien Agreste loved Marinette Dupain-Cheng who was Ladybug…..Somehow, it looked like she was Lucky after all.


	11. The Beginning of Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kisses and admissions, Cat Noir likes to surprise Marinette, Marinette reunites with her parents, embarrasses herself in front of her Dad, and her Maman has a surprise for her, filled with love and happiness. Marinette learns to love herself again. Jules comes back. Is he the good guy or the bad guy? Do we find out in this chapter or will he strike again?

Her blood rushed through her ears when Adrien suddenly jerked back, panting heavily. His green cat-like eyes stared down at her. Dark, hot desire shot straight from his gaze into her belly, spreading a warmth throughout her limbs that shook her to her soul. His gaze was also tinged with reluctance and hesitancy, his eyebrows furrowed over dilating pupils. One of his hands that had rose to her messy bun and tangled in it had clenched into a steady hold, the other hands palm flat against her lower back and pressing her to him. His chest was heaving with the deep breaths, mouth parted slightly and lips wet from their heated kiss.

Her cheeks exploded at the sight and she took her lip beneath her top teeth, Adrien’s eyes flickering to the gesture. He sighed softly and the harshness of his indecision faded into a heavy acceptance. “I really didn’t want to stop.”

Marinette was still feeling sparks shooting all the way to her toes. She wiggled them in Adrien’s socks into the cold of his floor to clear the numbing effect the sparks of attraction left behind. Bluebells looked up at him, her heart pulsing with a bubbly warmth as her lips stretched into a small, reassuring smile. 

Her hands, still flat against his buttoned white shirt and clutching the silky material, slowly unfurled so her palms could rest against his chest where his heart was thumping inside. “I didn’t want you too, either, Chaton.”

He shivered like her words physically stabbed him. With lightning reflexes, Adrien’s hands shot to her arms and he gently, softly, pushed her back. Confused, her heart gave a sharp pang as her mind flashed to the early morning when he had refused to even meet her eyes. 

He must have saw the clear panic in her blue orbs because his fingers dug into her arms with force, keeping her from pulling away from him as he rushed to explain. “I want to, Princess, believe me, I do! But…..” 

Adrien looked down, eyes falling to his feet in defeat. His shoulders slumped forward and, unable to bear seeing him like that, Marinette shook his hands off and wrapped her arms around his head. She brought him to her bosom, resting her chin atop his silky hair as she mumbled into the golden tresses, “But?”

His voice echoed inside her flesh, carried through her bloodstream, and lodged itself inside her bones. The words curled like thorned stems of roses: sharp, cutting, and yet healed all the cracks and all the scars littering her shattered spirit. “…..But I respect you too much for, uh, whatever this is. You need time to heal. This isn’t-we can’t –,” He sighed heavily, warm breath blowing against her borrowed shirt and warming the skin beneath. “Not now, Mari. Heal. Heal first and then…..”

His head shot up so quickly she had to thrust her head backwards to stop her nose from being smashed by his skull. His hopeful, nervous gaze surprised her as she tried to work through his earlier confessions but he continued before she could. “Then, maybe, you and I-we-we can –“

His struggle was not lost on her. He was weary of saying what may happen as, honestly, neither of them truly knew what to expect. But Marinette tightened her arms around him, burying her nose in his hair. 

“We will. Adrien, thank you. Thank you so much.” Tears pricked her closed eyes as his head nuzzled into her collarbone. “Without you I-I wouldn’t have been able to heal at all.”

Hands dug in like she was his lifeline and his whole body sagged into her, both of them holding the other up. Adrien Agreste had no idea what his kiss and his confessions had done to her and Marinette wasn’t too sure she understood what her body was feeling. Like a flower blooming to the sun’s rays, she felt invigorated and alive. The fear and panic of her assault were tickling the back of her mind but they were eradicated by the heart he had laid bare before her eyes. It wasn’t a love confession, not by any means, and a kiss didn’t mean he loved her either. Attraction and desire were there but…..Adrien showed her he didn’t _not_ love her. 

And that was enough for her. 

“Whenever you two lovebirds –” There was a loud smacking sound before Plagg continued, grumpy and grumbling out the rest of his sentence. “ –Are done, aren’t Marinette’s parents expecting you?”

A slow red form flew toward them, hovering in the air by Marinette just as Adrien lifted his head. The two teens blinked, faces darkening, and separated immediately facing Tikki with equally matching looks of distress and embarrassment. It was too amusing for the recovering kwami and she burst into peals of giggles, holding her stomach as she floated in the air between them. Plagg’s black furry form darted forwards to float by Tikki’s side, shaking his head at the two teens who were taut and making it a note to not look at one another. 

He smirked slyly and opened his mouth, prepared to embarrass them until they had melted into puddles on the ground, but Tikki slapped an antenna over his fanged mouth. Calming down from her fit, the red God softly gazed at the super heroes before her, her lips still twisted in an amused smile. She couldn’t wait to see them grow. It was clear to her now what Master Fu had seen in the two of them and why they were Chosen. Different could change the world. 

“Marinette, since you don’t have your purse, where should I hide?” Red head cocked to the side as she examined her Chosen’s attire, Tikki slowly hovered forward until she reached her. 

Her lips pressed together as she tried to see a solution, Marinette’s cupped hands came up beneath her so Tikki could rest against the girl’s palms. She gave Marinette’s thumb a quick appreciative kiss. Marinette smiled at the gesture, her shoulders loosening in the wake of attention being off her and Adrien. She gestured to the inside of her shirt with a blush, eyes darting to the side to make sure Adrien was engrossed in conversation with Plagg – which he was – before she turned back and whispered, “You could always relax in my bra?”

Tikki raised an eyebrow at the sudden shyness, happy to see that even after an incident like last night, her Marinette hadn’t changed. She nodded. “That’s a great idea!”

Zooming into her shirt, Tikki wiggled into her bra and she muffled her giggles at the feeling of the red kwami nuzzling down into her breasts. She peeked down the collar of her shirt to see Tikki looking up, sly mischief dancing in her eyes. Marinette frowned down at her in mock seriousness before she let out a breath and looked over to Adrien. Who was staring right at her. Plagg was too but with more amusement. Blushing as red as her suit, she giggled and shrugged causing Plagg to chuckle at her before his tail nudged Adrien’s shoulder.

“Bet you wish you could go in there.”

Eyes wide, both teens stared at Plagg as if he had uttered the most ridiculous blasphemy he could ever sprout. The black shirt did nothing to hide Tikki’s zeroed in gaze on him either and he snorted derisively as he gazed between the two flabbergasted and embarrassed teenagers gawking at him. Then, a moment later as if realizing something, Plagg turned sheepish: he looked anywhere but at Marinette as he flew toward her, a tense awkwardness filling the air between them when he didn’t speak right away. When he did, his voice was hushed, as if speaking the words was something meant to be secret or his life was forfeit.

“…..Sorry. You don’t need that, after last night.” His tail flicked behind him and from the side, Marinette could make out the affectionate pride reflecting in Adrien’s green gaze as he looked at his kwami. 

“So, uh, sorry. And you know,” Plagg gave her an approving look with his slit eyes that flooded her with self confidence at the fact this God acknowledged her, that _Cat Noir’s_ kwami acknowledged her. “You’re one strong girl.”

Marinette beamed at the praise, ignoring the sting of her bruised flesh at the motion, proud of herself for knowing Plagg was right. She leaned over and gave the black cat a quick peck on his nose, ignoring his indignant squawks, before turning to Adrien. The golden haired boy’s eyes were already on her, soft and gentle, and with the Sun shining behind him he looked like an angel. Storing the image away for later – she could design some wings – Marinette gestured to the open window. 

“I think we should head out now or my parents might call the armed officials for me.”

Adrien snorted out a laugh and bowed, one hand on his heart and the other spread to the window as he exaggeratedly told her, “Ladybug’s first. This mere Cat would never dare to mistreat hiss Lady.”

Groaning, she made her way to the ledge and when Adrien rose to his full height, infuriating grin in place, she jabbed a finger at him. “I can hardly handle them when you’re a cat. Please don’t use them without the mask!”

He nipped at her finger and she glared at him but her upward twitching lips betrayed her. Adrien chuckled. “Now now M’Lady. No need to claw my heart out.”

Her head fell into her hands as she shook it, defeat weighing heavily on her shoulders. “I swear to the Miraculous, Adrien…...”

From behind small fingers and even with her eyes closed, even though she didn’t hear him mumble the words, she saw the flashes of green, black, and yellow magick. Slowly she opened her eyes to the darkness of her hands and swallowed thickly, her heart pounding. Should she look? She knew he was Cat Noir, and she had accepted it, but…..Seeing him transform would be the ultimate show of trust, the ultimate acceptance of their lives from this day on. Remembering the kiss, Marinette took a deep breath and raised her head.

The sight took her breath away for more than one reason. The magick that flowed over him was crackling like electricity and though she couldn’t see distinct shapes or colours of his form being hidden by the magick, she could _feel_ it: strong, deadly, and electrifying like lightning. Where Ladybug’s powerful transformation was gentle and sweet, Cat Noir’s was dark and sparkling. When the magick burst into sparks of black, yellow, and green it was Cat Noir who stood before her. Those slit, luminescent green pools stared into her own, gluing her feet to the floor. It felt like his gaze saw straight through her eyes and into her body. 

The same magick that transformed him was shooting through her, leaving behind a sparkling energy that zapped her into life from the inside out. As the twinkling of the magick faded into the air, Cat Noir fidgeted with his steel booted feet before he sheepishly held out a clawed hand to her. The black leather was tight as it stretched across his open palm, the claws at the tips lengthened from his own nails. The leathery spandex glittered and shone in the light of the Sun, darkness absorbing light, and Marinette bit her lip at the unexpected rush that powered through her.

She wanted to cry and laugh and scream in excited triumph all at once! Her blood no longer thrummed quietly; it roiled and washed through her veins like an ocean’s waves in a storm. Her head was sore, pounding at the temples, but she ignored it. She was alive what else did she have to be afraid of? With the magick of Cat Noir flowing through her, Marinette reached for his hand and small fingers wrapped around it. If he was surprised by the tightness of her grip, he didn’t say anything, only pulled her forward slowly. Their eyes connected when she was a few steps away and it sent her heart racing at the searching gaze she found there. 

Slitted green orbs made her heart leap inside her chest, light and weightless, kindled into a warm burst of fire that sung through her blood. Those eyes were suddenly her favourite in the world – not that they weren’t before! She curled her fingers a bit more as she took the final steps forward and looked up at him. He looked down and she could feel his chest tighten at the small breath that remained between them. 

A dark fear coiled in the depths of green and Marinette frowned, her eyebrows squeezing together. Leaning down, all air was sucked into the endless heat of Adrien’s body, the tips of their noses brushing and sending her heart careening inside her chest. 

His low, rumbling murmur did nothing to soothe her nerves. “You won’t…...”

He tensed and suddenly withdrew from her, that fake smile in place as he laughed awkwardly. Rubbing a clawed hand at the back of his neck, he faced the open window, eyes clouded over and hazy with his desire to keep whatever he had been about to say hidden. “Shall we go, M’Lady? We don’t want to keep your pare –“

He hadn’t expected her to lunge for him and to be honest she hadn’t either. Her arms wrapped around his middle from the side, fingers clawing at the leather near his ribs. She buried her head into the side of his chest, eyes closed in pain, and it took him no time to wrap an arm around her shoulders. He held her to him as he gazed out the window, the tension in his body bringing tears to the corners of her eyes. Defeat tainted the air around him as if he had already decided that whatever decision he had made was the end of something. 

It didn’t take long before she remembered silver silk and purple-eyed peacocks. The look he had given her, during one of their quiet moments, had been lonely and wistful, faraway, and it hadn’t taken long for her to deduce that these had probably belonged to his Mother. Realizing how special that was for him to allow her to wear them, Marinette realized now what he had been about to ask. 

She pulled away, his arm falling off of her shoulders, and looked up at him, incredulous and slightly hurt. How could he ever believe she would do anything like that to him? How could he believe she had the power to hurt him? 

Clenching her hands into shaking fists, tears in the corners of her eyes, she narrowed her gaze even though he refused to meet hers. “I will _never_ abandon you. Never. This is you and me, Adrien. As friends and partners. You’ve got my back. And I’ve got yours.”

His jaw tightened and she could see the muscles in his back growing taut with the tension spiralling through him and even though she couldn’t see his gaze, the black mask clenched across his cheeks with the war inside of him. Swallowing past the painful, bitter lump of hurt in her throat, Marinette reached out with slow, gentle hands. She wrapped both hands around his tensely muscled arm and the moment she gripped the cool leather in her hands, his head snapped to hers. 

She was greeted with the slit green gaze of a boy who had a heart of gold but shattered trust. A world weary darkness tinted those green orbs and she gasped sharply, not prepared for the loneliness in those eyes to peer at her. A small, sad smile tilted his lips and he turned his gaze back out the window. “For how long? How long before you decide to leave me too? How long before,” He took a deep breath, his chest constricting and Marinette’s grip on his arm tightened. “Before you decide to stop loving me, too?”

There, he had said it. The words were out now and there was nowhere for her to run: Adrien definitely knew she loved him and she should have been angry he knew for so long….But all she could feel was a soul-eating sorrow that he believed she could even stop loving him. A surge of fierce protectiveness made her open her mouth before she could stop to think. “I am _not_ them. You loved your Mother. And you love your Dad.” 

Marinette squeezed his arm to stop him from rebuking the comment, his green orbs trailing back to hers. When he met them, the tension drained out of him and he was looking at her like she was his lifeline. Her next words could keep him afloat or sink him. The raw need for love reflecting in his eyes brushed a fire inside of her to burn away anything that dared hurt him. 

Resolved, she met his green pools head on. “You did not deserve what happened to you. It was _not_ your fault, Adrien. Your Maman leaving, your Pere sealing himself away from you.” 

Her voice broke and the tears pooling at the corners of her eyes spilled over. Adrien’s green pools were intent on every word she was saying, bright and misty. “They are to blame, not you. And,” She took a deep breath, smiling when she felt the encouraging tap from the kwami cuddled in her bra beneath her shirt. “That is not love. _This_ is love.”

Her hands slid down his arm to grip his clawed hand. She traced the edges and his fingers with her blue orbs, memorizing every indent and every crease of the black leather against his skin. Taking a deep breath, she gazed up at him from dark lashes and pink cheeks. “I love you, Adrien.”

His clawed hand tightened instantly around both of her own and she watched the loneliness slowly recede, fading out of his green pools in the form of tears building at the corners of his eyes beneath the black mask. A slow smile spread across his lips as his green orbs brightened, her heart beating erratically at the sight. Her eyes widened when his glowing slitted orbs faded into a happy mischief and she went to take a step back. His hand holding both of hers kept her tethered to him and she squealed when he pulled her gently forward.

Using his grip on her hands, he twisted and she stumbled forward. Cat Noir’s leather clad arms came up to lift her off her feet and into his arms. One was wrapped around her back and the other beneath her legs, the position familiar and comforting. Memories of his warmth, his heady scent, and the clashing of thunder and lightning filled her mind. He had held her like this before, many times, and yet this time was completely different. Usually when Cat Noir held her, it was firm and tight but this time his hold was loose against her body. He stepped up onto the metal frame with both feet, the metal pawed boots clanking against the metal. 

Cat’s black, belted tail swished behind him in the room as cool Spring wind blew over their bodies, brushing against their clothes and through their hair. The cool breeze felt good against her warm skin and helped to stabilize her emotions. Securing her arms around his neck, Marintte’s bluebell orbs met the bright glare of the Sun. She squinted at the brightness of the light, watching it fall across Paris in a play of shadows. Her eyes searched for the alley she had been last night and when they fell on the buildings surrounding it, cold fear pooled in her gut. 

She wasn’t aware she had tightened her arms around his neck until his voice rumbled through, own grip tightening around her in response. “Hey, it’s okay. I’ll go a dif-fur-rent way, Princess.”

Looking up at the slightly rounded jaw of her classmate, Marinette smiled gratefully at him as she leaned her head against his collarbone. She could feel the soft beats of his heart and let it lull her into a peaceful state of mind. Relaxing into his hold, her smile turned into a grin of delight when Cat leaped from the window, shooting them upwards with a twist of his wrist. She watched them slowly soar upwards into the bright blue sky, the only thing holding them up being his one-handed grip on his baton. Marinette had no qualms. She had been up here many times, up on his baton and sitting on his knee, surveying Paris and protecting it’s citizens.

Awe filled her when they came to a stop, half way up from the Eiffel Tower. The large, metal building cast a shadow across their bodies and despite the brightness of the Sun, it was cool in the shade of the Tower. The wind was stronger and rustled her hair, combing through her strands like fingers dancing through her hair to erase nightmares in the night. Bright rays blinded her momentarily, rainbow spots dancing in her vision when the glare hit her eyes. There was the sound of leather rustling then a shadow blocked her eyes from the sunlight.

Blinking to clear the dots, she was met with the black belt of Cat Noir’s tail, the metal tip glinting in the light of the Sun. The end of his tail flicked and Marinette’s heart skipped a beat at the soft, sweet gesture. She was amazed the more she realized this boy knew exactly what she needed when she needed it, without her ever even speaking a word. Nuzzling her head into his chest, Marinette whispered with her eyes on the Sun, “Thank you.”

~ * ~

There was too much at stake for her to give up so willingly. Her attacker was out there and through the mist of fear curling in the back of her mind at the thought, peace still enveloped her like the closed petals of a flower or the thorns of a rose. She had _lived_ and now she could not only heal but she could protect Paris with a renewed vigour, a passion she hadn’t been lacking but that was now reinforced by the evil that had always lurked in the shadows she had always missed. Her rose coloured glasses were gone. This was a war they were fighting. There were innocent lives at stake and Marinette wasn’t going to let another citizen of the city she loved be hurt. 

Swallowing through the thick, fierce protectiveness swelling inside her she looked up at Cat Noir’s visage. Held across his lap bridal style with his legs crouched to either side of her body, the cold, black leather stretched and moulded to his form in a way that had her stomach bubbling with heat that flooded her cheeks and down her neck. His golden bell hung around his neck from the open collar of his suit where she knew a zipper lie. The little bell was moving slightly in the wind, tinkling quietly in the whispers of the Spring breeze. 

His arms were thin but strong as they held her and she could feel the taut, muscles of his legs through her body, knowing the muscles that lived beneath his skin. She had seen them ripple in their fights and though Adrien was not as muscled as Kim, Marinette knew his strength – like the cat he was – lied more in his stealth. He was strong and he had strength in all the right parts of his body but what made Cat Noir special was his inner strength, his inner panther, that alighted a whole new level of power. She trailed her eyes down those leather clad arms to the hand curled beneath her legs, his fingers curled into the black leggings that hung around her hips.

Claws. She had never truly seen them before, never truly given them a good look. At first she had thought they were from the suit but now, looking at the curve and the fact that the claws ran straight back into Cat Noir’s fingers, she knew they were real. Those dangerous claws of her partner’s came from Adrien’s nails. Those were his _real_ nails. The black spandex was elastically stretched over his clawed nails and then spanning out over his fingers. Those claws had saved her life and those hands had held her in so many different ways, burning their memory into her skin and her mind. 

She huffed a small chuckle before something chirped, speeding past their forms held atop Cat Noir’s baton. Head snapping towards the sky and looking out over Paris, Marinette was greeted by a beautiful sight. Two Eurasian Jay birds were flying together, twisting and darting through the sky. Their song filled the air with gentle chirps and the lull of mimicked music from Paris’ multiple selections. A smile curled her lips as she watched them dance in the sky, singing and flying with more passion than she had ever seen before.

They twittered through the air and flew by her one last time before they darted off out of sight, her eyes following them. Watching the birds her main focus, she didn’t see the mischievous slitted pools of Cat Noir glance down at her as he slowly tightened his body…..

And launched them through the air.

A mix between a squeal and a squeak erupted from her lungs as she clung tight to her partner. His laughter eased her as he shouted above the wind. “I’ll keep you safe, Princess.”

Darkness and light flew behind them as they fell. Her black, blue tinted hair twisted and curled into Cat’s silky, golden strands as they plummeted through the air to a rooftop below. The wind pressed intimately, firmly, against her body like a lover and she giggled at the feeling. It rushed over her and left her belly flopping and heart weightless in her chest. Cat flung his baton to his lower back as his tail flapped out behind them, whipping behind him. The metal tip glinted with the rays of light from the Sun. When Cat Noir landed, his silver booted paws hit the stone rooftop with a small thud and a clink of metal hitting stone. 

His knees were bent but he stood mostly upright with her anchored in his arms. Giving her no warning, he vaulted over the roof with quick, quiet movements and Marinette hummed in agreement as Cat launched them through Paris. Her city was beautiful, always, and she loved it even with the fear of her attack fresh in her mind. Cat’s feet were sure-footed as he hopped from one roof to the next, darting across them lithely. His feet made no sound and the wind whistled through their hair and over their bodies. The heat of his body offset the coolness of the Spring air and Marinette’s heart swelled for the boy holding her.

She didn’t know what waited for them next but whatever it was, she would face it with her head held high. When Cat vaulted off a roof, she expected he would vault to the next however her Kitty had learned a thing or two: he liked to scare her. She let out a shrill, high pitched scream when Cat twisted mid-air, metal paws thudding quietly against the stone of the building as he ran sideways along the Seine. Giving the hair at the back of his neck a gentle tug for scaring her, she grinned wide at the feel of running sideways along Paris. 

Tilting her head back, she looked at the river Seine flowing and rushing through the city, glinting a deep blue from the Sun’s light. When she tilted her head back, Cat launched off the side of the building, twisting in the air to land elegantly atop the column capstone of the Pont de la Tournelle. She breathed out in a breathy sigh at the feeling of her heart and stomach flipping in her body like restless butterflies. Her sore head throbbed a little at the pressure and with a wince, she raised a hand to rub at her painful temple.

She felt Cat shift her to sit on his knee as he crouched down atop the cap of the stone column. He kept the arm wrapped around her back but lifted the other out from beneath her legs to gingerly finger her bruised cheek and her sore forehead. Thin, sharp claws barely grazed her skin but left deep gouges of burning fire across her heart at the intimate touch. The green pools gazing tenderly at her did nothing to soothe her rapid heart. 

Breaking the gaze for fear of her heart exploding, she snapped her head away and broke his claws from her skin. Her breath caught at the thick explosion of nostalgia, nausea tumbling in her gut as her throat clenched. Her parents’ Bakery was there, sitting at the corner of the 21st Arrondissement as if nothing had changed. The sun reflected off the shiny windows, casting a glare across the side-walk of bright light. Desire overcame her to feel her parents arms around her, to bask in the familiar scent of sweetness and yeast, the dryness of the ovens, and the smell of fresh bread being made. The desire itched beneath her skin, begging for her to move and find her parents and throw her arms around them. 

Marinette hadn’t experienced this since she had been a little girl in school teased about being Chinese, when her Pere’s large form had embraced her in his bulky arms and held her close. She wanted that now, wanted those arms to help her feel safe and happy again. And she _needed_ Adrien there, she needed her Kitty or she wasn’t sure she would have the strength to build herself back up again. She tapped her fingers against the back of his neck, pushing back the tears swelling in her eyes, and he hesitated only a second before he lowered her legs to the stone of Pont de la Tournelle. 

As soon as her sneakers hit the bridge, she turned her head back to the Bakery and all breath left her as she stood there, motionless. Sabine Cheng pushed open the Bakery door to allow a customer carrying a large white cake box through. The two exchanged smiles and chatted before Sabine bowed and the customer – poor Penny was running Jagged’s errands again so there was no telling what kind of cake had been ordered – headed off, rounding the corner of the Arrondissement. Her Maman turned and Marinette itched to run to her, hug her, and cling to her safe, warm embrace. But Sabine didn’t head back inside the Bakery. Instead, the small Chinese woman with black hair and gray eyes sunk into one of the wooden chairs outside the business.

Her Maman leaned her head back against the chair and closed her eyes, and even from where they stood across from the Bakery, Marinette could see the dark circles beneath her Maman’s eyes and the worried wrinkles crinkling her mouth. She took a step forward subconsciously, mouth parted, but she didn’t get far before the Bakery door’s bell jingled and a larger, bulkier form stepped out. Tom Dupain was a broad, thickly muscled man and he had to shuffle around the small, round wooden table sitting in-between the three wooden chairs Marinette recognized to sit down next to his wife. Those chairs reminded Marinette of a happy memory, laughing in the Sun with her Maman’s special Lotus tea and two friends laughing with her. 

Alya and Jules. Suddenly, Marinette didn’t think she could do it. How could she possibly face all the people she loved? How could she tell them anything without revealing she was Ladybug? Chest tightening, she stumbled back. The moment her back hit a firm body, a single arm wrapped around the middle of her torso and a clawed hand tangled fingers with her own. 

Golden locks tickled her ear and the side of cheek as her heart pounded in her chest. His breath ghosted past her cheek as he quietly told her, “Don’t worry, I’ve got you Mari. We will do this. To-cat-ther.”

One side of her lip twitched into a half smile as her blood slowed it’s frantic pulsing through her body and her chest loosened enough for her to breathe. She breathed out a shaky sigh and knocked her head against his softly. “Want to hear a secret?”

He turned his head slightly so his nose was in her hair at the side of his head, letting out a rumbling ‘hmm’ and taking a long inhale. When she realized he was sniffing her, she flushed down to her toes and her stomach jumped into her throat at the sweet, intimate gesture as she breathily told him, “I actually like your puns.”

He jerked as if branded and she was suddenly gazing into wide, surprised green, the leather ears perched atop his head twitching in confusion. “Y-You do…..?”

Marinette nodded, gazing fondly at the boy who held her heart. “Mhmm. Most of the time they’re annoying.” She ignored his flabbergasted squawk with a grin and a turn of her head, looking back at her parents chatting quietly in the wooden chairs. “But sometimes…...Sometimes they really make me appreciate you, Chaton. You can always make me smile.”

She didn’t see his cheeks darken but she could feel the hot blush across his cheeks when he buried his head into the groove of her neck and shoulder, the mask cold compared to his burning cheeks as he mumbled into her skin, “I’m clawing off on you too much, M’Lady. I’m debating if I should get a cat collar with your name on it.”

She did snort in laughter then and gave a quick smile to the mop of blonde hair hiding in her shoulder. Her large smile faded to a gentle look. “Will you come with me, Kitty?”

Cat pulled back and looked up from beneath golden hair, those glowing green slit eyes meeting hers with such a seriousness it took her breath away again. Her heart puttered to a halt at the way he stared at her. “Anything. You need me, I will be there. You never need to ask.”

Marinette smiled with tears budding at the corners of her gaze, staring back at him with gratitude and appreciation. “Thank you, Adrien.”

His name rolled off her tongue before she could stop it and by the way his eyebrows shot into his hairline and his ears fell downward, she guessed it had surprised him as much as it surprised her. She knew it was Adrien beneath the mask but to be able to call him that and not have to hide from who they were was more liberating than she had thought. Realizing she would have to tell Master Fu about their reveal, she looked away from Cat and back to her parents, wincing when she thought that the person she admired might be disappointed in her. 

Pushing the thought back and pushing back the ‘aw’ in her throat at the feeling of Tikki curled up in her bra, softly snoring, Marinette squared her shoulders and stepped out of Cat’s hold. He let her go without a fight and she looked back at him over her shoulder, determined and resolute. “Go in through the hatch in my bedroom. I’ll give you a signal when it’s safe to come down.”

Cat cocked his head, tail swishing behind him. His ears perked upwards, shifting slightly against his head from the rustling wind that was picking up. “What’s the cat call, Princess?”

She grinned and winked at him, lifting a finger and waggling it at him. He blinked in indignation at the reprimand and she bit her lip to keep from laughing. “You’ll know it when you hear it, Kitty. Are you ready?”

She watched his expression fall to surprise then a firm look then melt into a soft, concerned stare that made her fidget in her spot, nervousness welling up inside of her. “Are you?”

She took a deep breath and nodded, looking back at her parents. She knew he could hear her no matter how soft she spoke. “No. But I need to do this.”

There was a shuffle of movement and then an all encompassing heat wrapped around her body from behind and she tensed, her heart jolting into rhythm. He was dangerously close. She could smell his cologne – a gentle musk and slightly airy – and feel his body heat trying to suffocate her in it’s warm embrace. If she leaned back, Marinette knew he would be right there and something deep inside her pulsed at the thought. Her hair all over her body including her head shot up as soon as he tilted his lips down, pressing them against the top of the back of her head. It sent an electric jolt that snapped her to life. 

Her blood pumped through her body frantically as her heart beat faster. Her skin tingled, raw and intense, and every muscle inside of her suddenly fell into a lulled state of relaxation. And then he was gone, vaulting back the way they had come. She watched, mutedly and in a heated haze, as he vaulted up the side of the building, shot his baton down to the street below, and landed crouched on all fours atop her balcony railing. He looked back, green slits strong and boring holes into her skin, before he launched down to the hatch and disappeared. 

Breath returned and her mouth parted as she took in small pants of brisk Spring air to cool off her extremely heated body. Her bluebell orbs fell to her parents again and she inhaled, her diaphragm expanding with the breath, and then exhaled. As ready as she could ever be, Marinette hesitantly made her way down the side-walk and towards the Bakery. Her parents couldn’t see her at the cross-walk and she fidgeted, anxious and nervous, wondering what she would say and what to do. She crossed the street slowly, approaching her parents. As she got closer she could see her Pere’s bulky hand tightly holding her Maman’s in her lap.

The sight brought forth the tears she had fought back and she pressed her lips together before she meandered to her Maman’s left, both of her parents looking up. The sight of her parents’ faces dark and wrinkled, aged, caused her knees to wobble and the tears in her eyes to overflow as she took in a gasping breath. She didn’t manage to get any words out before her Maman stood and pulled her daughter falling apart into her arms. And Marinette let herself fall. 

The hot tears burned her as they slid down her cheek to her jaw as she wrapped both her arms around her Maman’s back, falling to her knees to press her head into Sabine’s chest where the beating heart was the only thing Marinette cared to hear. She pushed aside everything else and let her Maman’s heartbeat soothe her, the smell of sweet dough, lotus blossoms, and cherry blossoms invading her senses. It was the most familiar scent she knew, one she knew as a baby and one she had known all her life. The steady thumping of her Maman’s heart slowly eased her tears until the two were simply holding each other, tightly, and Marinette wasn’t sure she would ever find the strength to let go again.

A thicker set of arms wrapped her and her Maman into a broader body and Marinette let her eyes fall closed as her parents held her, their scents calming her anxiety and her fear. What had she been so afraid of? Of course her parents would love her unconditionally. She felt Tikki shift in her bra, the small kwami cuddling into the flesh of her chest and Marinette cracked a smile at the feeling of Tikki trying her hardest to offer comfort in the group hug. As her emotions calmed down to a simmer, she pulled out of her parents embrace and stood to her feet. 

Tikki gave her an encouraging pat and Marinette smiled, tears hanging in the corners of her eyes. She sniffled quietly and gazed at the concerned, empathetic expressions on her parents’ faces. The looks were so identical on two very different people that she burst into a small fit of giggles before she found the strength to speak. 

“I could really use some of those cookies right now.”

Her Pere laughed loudly, a wide grin on his face as he turned to head back into the Bakery, propping open the door for the two of them to come through. “I’ll go grab some from the Bakery and meet you upstairs.”

Marinette took a deep breath as her Maman strode through the open door and towards the back of the Bakery where she knew there was a door leading to the rest of the home. They passed her Pere who was gathering the largest, softest cookies he could find and it warmed Marinette’s heart to see him lumbering around the Bakery just for her and she vowed to make it up to him later. At the smell of the cookies, Marinette felt Tikki vibrate in excitement. The little kwami pinched the soft skin of the side of her breast and she yelped, both her parents shooting wide, panicked looks her way. 

She waved them off with her hands, grimacing as she tried to hurriedly find an excuse. All she managed to shout off the top of her head was, “Pad! My pad, uh, you know….It’s sticky and it…..” Her entire face darkened as she hurriedly mumbled the last bit, avoiding her parents eyes. “My pad pulled my hair.”

At first her Pere was unsure, glancing between her and her Maman in confusion. “…..Pad…..?”

“Oh!” Recognition flashed in Sabine’s gray orbs as she gave her daughter a sympathetic pat on her arm before smiling politely at her husband. “Tom, Marinette is a teenage girl.”

Tom looked between them both with less confusion and more like they had both grown two heads. He scratched at his own head with his free hand as his eyebrows scrunched together. “Yes, I know. But…..What does that –“

Marinette’s embarrassment hit a critical level and she shouted, beet red face buried in her hands. “My period, Pere!”

Sabine’s laughter drowned Tom’s sputtering as she pulled Marinette by her elbow through the door in the back. When it clicked shut behind them, she peeked out from her fingers at Sabine’s amused expression and hid them again with a groan. “That was the most embarrassing moment of my life. Ever.”

Sabine chuckled and parted Marinette’s elbows from her face, reaching up to brush a few loose strands of hair out of her face. Sabine always had a motherly look about her and it was one of the things Marinette loved about her Maman. The gentle, loving look relaxed her tense, emotionally strung body and she exhaled out her stress.

“It was probably more embarrassing for him, xīngān bǎobèi.”

Though small, Sabine Cheng was no pushover and despite her size, her heart was three times as big. Her Maman’s face was round with some wrinkles at the corner of her mouth from the worry still glistening in her gray orbs as the smaller woman in her working attire – her usual white Cheongsam with red, black, and gold designs and her usual periwinkle pants – headed for the blue carpeted staircase. Marinette followed Sabine to the stairs, her sneakers quiet against the carpet as she watched her mother climb the stairs, one hand gently gliding up the wooden railing.

She bit her lip and hesitated but pushed forward. “What, exactly, did Adrien say to you, when he texted you?”

Sabine didn’t turn around, even when they reached the first floor and padded to a door right across from the stairs. A small dainty hand reached for the door knob and held it but Sabine didn’t open the door right away. “That you were attacked but safe. He reassured us that he would protect you. And that he was sorry.”

Feeling the sting of tears, Marinette swallowed before she could speak. “I don’t think I really want to talk about it but….I was attacked. And Adrien was,” Marinette relaxed, feeling a small smile stretch across her lips. “He was amazing. Without him, Maman, I don’t know what I would have done.”

Sabine looked back, her gray eyes shinning with love and affection as she told her daughter, “Neither do we. We’ve got a surprise for you in here. They’ve been waiting here ever since we called them asking if they knew where you were, before Adrien text us.”

Right as she turned the doorknob, she whispered, “You are very loved, my girl.”

The moment the door opened to reveal the Dupain-Cheng living room and kitchen, Marinette cried out and the stinging tears flew from her eyes as she ran clumsily toward the figure she would know anywhere in the world. Her arms wound tight around her best friend’s body as her sobs tore through her chest, echoing into the small living room as Alya hugged her back tightly. The two girls held tight and long, faces buried in each other. Alya’s long, wavy hair was tied back in a thick ponytail but her black rimmed glasses dug into Marinette’s jaw. She couldn’t be bothered to care. 

In the next moment there was a mumbling conversation and then from her left another set of arms hugged both her and Alya to their body. She would know that mop of brown hair anywhere and she threw one arm around Nino, pulling him into the tight hug. He hugged them both and ran soothing fingers up both of their backs. Somehow the sweet gesture made her cry harder and louder, unable to control the torrent and flood of emotions coursing through her. 

It wasn’t until the next set of arms pulled all three into – and slightly up and off the ground – a bone crushing hug that she even noticed his presence. But the moment golden locks tickled her face, she knew it was Jules. Jules was here. Alya was here and crying into her shoulder. Nino was there and comforting her. Her parents were here, warm and loving. Marinette’s heart burst suddenly with a sparkling warmth at the thought that she could finally let herself believe:

She was loved, as Marinette, by all these people. Closing her stinging, sore eyes all she could do was hold on to the friends hugging her tight. Their love and worry and comfort seeped into her skin, flowed through her blood, soaked into her bones, and saturated her soul. Slowly, all the pieces of her broken self melded back together with the glue of love. 

All she could whisper was “Thank you.”


	12. Climaxes and Resolutions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marinette finds that sometimes the only way to heal is to let go and move forward. Can she still find it in her to move forward when a terrible event shakes her belief in not only herself but her partner? Sometimes, all you _do_ need is love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone so much for sticking with me!! We are nearing the end! Well, actually, this _is_ the end. I have two bonus chapters (possibly three) to explain some loose ends but this is it. This is the time where it all comes together. Thank you all so much for your comments, your kudos, and your support by reading this story. I'm extremely happy and all of you are beautiful, wonderful people. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.  <3

By the time the mess of teenagers all calmed down, Marinette was emotionally exhausted. She sniffled, eyes closed with her head leaning on Alya’s shoulder. Nino and Jules still had their arms wrapped around the girls in a firm hold, giving comfort and offering their support. The emotion flowing between the four of them was soft and sweet, welling up inside of Marinette like a bright light being flipped on. It flooded her with it’s gentle, bright warmth. Taking a raspy inhale from her stuffy nose, all she can smell is the slight perfumed scent of Alya’s favourite flower, the tiger lily. Slowly, she uncurls her fingers from their clutch in Alya’s shirt and gives them a gentle tap against her best friend’s back.

Alya was never a slow girl and her brain worked quicker than most so she instantly knew what Marinette wanted. Inhaling deeply and lifting up her chest, Alya shoves both boys away from them with one hand each, gives them each a steady stare in warning, and then those hazel-gold eyes are back on her. 

Her gaze is probing, wondering, and Marinette smiles tiredly at the thought of Alya’s reporter brain working quick to process the information being thrown at her. “M?”

The endearing nickname makes Marinette’s heart clench in a fond affection as she smiles a bit wider, giving Jules and Nino quick apologetic glances. “Sorry, it was just…...Too much, right now. You guys are great! It’s just….” She looked at the oak floor of the living room and dug the toe of a sneaker into the white and pink circular rug by her left. “A lot to process.”

“Do NOT make me hurt you, dog boy!”

At Alya’s indignant and angry shout, her head flies up, eyes wide in confusion and surprise only to burst into a wide grin at the sight melting her heart. Jules was fighting with Alya over a cookie, which she instantly knew they had planned to give to her to cheer her up, and by Jules’ height difference, her best friend was quickly losing. She took a step forward to stop their fighting and Jules’ mocha gaze snapped to her as he let go of the cookie which sent Alya flying backwards with a yelp. Quickly, Nino rushed to save her and caught her before she could hit the ground, guiding her with a hand on her elbow to the light pink couch.

The glare on Alya’s face could have burnt holes into Jules’ skull at the intensity of it and Marinette shrugged helplessly. “She’s intense but, I love her. She’s my best friend.”

Jules laughed quietly, moving closer to her side as they watched Nino and Alya wrestle over the TV remote. Their voices were quiet and muffled as they spoke, giving Marinette and Jules some private time. Standing next to the giant boy, her body began to relax and a safe feeling enveloped her. Blonde hair glowed from the light of the TV, making the strands dance a multitude of colours and maybe the flashing lights let her see the quick glimpse of guilt that flooded his gaze before he could wipe it away. 

The memory of green orbs drowning in guilt filled her mind and Marinette had enough of people feeling guilty for something that wasn’t their fault. Hell, it wasn’t even _her_ fault. “Jules, look at me.”

She turned sideways, leaning her hip against the kitchen counter with on arm on the top and the other on her hip. When he looked down at her, her heart melted at the beaten down puppy look and she smiled reassuringly. Light brown misted over and he sniffled quietly, mumbling, “I should have walked you home. It’s all my fault. You’re one of my friends and I let you down. I’m sorry.”

Marinette didn’t miss the way his eyes avoided the bruised side of her skin. He looked down at the ground, blonde hair falling into his face and he didn’t bother to push them back. And she had to push back the need to comfort him. She couldn’t let people keep taking the blame for her responsibilities. Not to mention, even though she hadn’t know Jules very long, she did know he was very sweet, kind, and could melt her heart in seconds. It didn’t take long before the words poured out of her mouth before she could stop them, typical Marinette style.

“If I had a brother, I think he would be like you.”

The reaction was not what she expected. His head flew up, blonde strands flying out. His eyes were wide and glittering with an excited fear. He leaned slightly closer, mouth parted as he asked, “I have no idea how to handle a sister! W-What do you do…?”

She could see the panic setting in of Jules trying to find a way to make her happy and dig his phone up out of his pocket to google how to be a good brother. The thought of him searching on how to be a brother made her giggle and Jules flushed, smiling awkwardly and rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. A small dusting of pink scattered over his cheeks and his lips twitched for only a moment before he giggled with her, both sharing wide smiles. 

Jules reached out with one hand to ruffle the top of her black hair, mussing up the hair tied at the nape of her neck and she narrowed her eyes up at him in slight amusement, slight annoyance. “You’re doing a pretty good job so far. You’ve got the annoying part down.”

Alya’s deep laughter floated over and both teens looked towards the couch. Alya was lying on her stomach, her legs curled up behind her over her buttocks. Her jeans shorts were frayed at the edges covering black leggings that encased her feet. Her white and purple plaid shirt was scrunched up beneath her as she leaned on her folded together hands, elbows dug into the soft couch cushion to keep her steady. Nino was relaxing into the couch, his arms hanging loosely over the back of the couch. The hand closest to Alya was playing with the loose hair of her ponytail, twirling and twisting it. 

His gaze was focused on the glare from the TV, a soft smile lit up by the flashing colours. He was wearing a dark green short sleeved shirt with his usual headphones around his neck and loose jeans. Alya waggled both her eyebrows at them, smirking like she dug up the story of the century. “Well, Mari, didn’t know you had it in you to insult anyone.”

Marinette blinked, giving Jules a quick glance to find him frantically looking between them for confirmation of if Marinette did consider him a brother or not or if this was all a terrible joke. Playing along with Alya’s scheme, she shrugged, turning to face her best friend and leaning her back against the counter. Both elbows held her up as she grinned and said, “Hey, it’s not an insult. It’s not a compliment but it’s not an insult.”

Both girls broke out into peals of laughter when Jules sputtered and moaned in confusion, trying to sort out his thoughts. Both his hands tangled in his hair as he gave both of them a glaring pout. “You two are evil. I’m trying to figure out if I’ve suddenly got a sister and neither of you are being helpful!”

Marinette, laughter dying down and cheeks hurting from the broad smile on her face, opened her mouth to let him know how she felt. Yes, he was a dork and a bit annoying at times but he was the sweetest boy she had ever met. And if she had ever wanted a brother, she couldn’t have asked for a better one than Jules. He was kind, respected her space, and caring. The boy had mastered the puppy dog pout – which he was giving them now and Alya was squealing trying to cover her eyes to avoid it – and he got along well with all of her friends. 

But she didn’t get to tell him before her Maman beat her to it. “That’s enough picking on my adopted son. He’s been so worried about Marinette he broke the Bakery side door down to come in when we called him to tell him she was missing.”

Sabine had snuck into the kitchen during the teenage moment, standing regally behind the counter and nursing a hot cup of what smelled like Lotus Blossom Tea. Jules snapped his head around, gave a couple of sniffs, and turned large, watery eyes to her Maman. Marinette’s jaw dropped when Sabine cooed at him and instantly turned. The older woman began making Jules’ cup of tea and Marinette’s awed face met his coy one.

He whispered so everyone could hear him, “See, I’m the adopted child. I have more rights.”

When her Maman turned back around, she was grinning and Marinette found her lip twitching into a half smile. “Mama! Don’t you know not to spoil strays or they never stop coming around? How did you adopt him anyway?”

Jules was bouncing on his feet and biting his lip, eager to tell her, and Marinette heard Alya mumble, “When I think I could possibly hate him, I love him.”

Both Marinette and Jules smothered their laughter when Nino asked, indignantly crying out, “Hey, what about me!?”

Alya simply waved him off. “Yeah, sure, whatever.”

The two teens turned from the squabble that erupted and Sabine set down two small tea cups atop the kitchen counter. They were white porcelain with a silver dragon design. The handle of the cup was also in a smooth, curled dragon form. They were her Maman’s favourite cups and it was the only thing she had brought with her from her family in China. Though she never mentioned anything really, Marinette knew there was something in her Maman, something dark and hidden, that she had left behind. 

She shook her head, broken out of her thoughts by the sound of pouring tea. She watched the liquid, the same colour of Jules’ eyes, flow into the cups, swirling with heat. The smell invaded her nose reminding her she was home. Her Maman slid the cups to her and Jules before she leaned around Marinette to shout to Nino and Alya who had regressed to wrestling on the floor in a tickle match, “Would you like some Lotus Blossom Tea?”

Nino shot to his feet, leaving Alya scrambling on the floor in an irritated huff, mumbling about how boyfriends care too much for their stomachs than their girlfriends. Once she’s standing, she pats her shirt down and heads to the kitchen counter, lacing her arm through Marinette’s as she gives a nod to Sabine. “Yes please!”

A dark skinned hand shot upwards as Nino leaned on the end of the counter with a grin, fixing the red cap atop his dark brown hair. “Me too, Mme Cheng.”

Sabine laughed as she filled the tea kettle with water and set it on top of the stove before she turned to face Nino. “Call me Sabine. All of you.” She levelled all of them with a firm look that had the boys gulping. “You are all part of our family. Marinette loves you, therefore we love you. Isn’t that right, Marinette?”

Marinette smiled and leaned into Alya, nodding her head and feeling a pang of guilt when she felt Tikki shift in her shirt, wishing she could include the kwami in her close circle. But no one could know about the Miraculous or her secret. “I don’t know what I would do without you guys.”

Alya groaned and when she lifted her head, she sighed heavily. “I don’t know about you guys, but I am _done_ with the mushy talk. Let’s drink this wonderful tea, play some video games, laugh at stupid movies, set up a fort in the living room, and have fun.”

As Nino engaged Sabine in conversation, helping her with the tea, Marinette tensed when she heard the quiet thud coming from her room. Face paling she realized she forgot one very important thing: a certain Cat stalking around in her bedroom! Mistaking her pale face for something other than sheer panic at Cat Noir being found in her bedroom, Nino pulled her into a quick, nervous hug. When he let her go he met her eyes and grinned, taking off his cap and putting on her head as he winked at her. “Girl am I glad you’re safe. I swear dude. If Adrien hadn’t sent that text, Als was gonna blackmail Mayor Bourgeois into sending out the entire police force!”

She giggled and looked at Alya who only shrugged nonchalantly, taking a sip of her tea as she met no one’s eyes. Her grin gave her away before she spoke. “He’s telling the truth. Gotta protect my girl. Would do anything for you, you know that, M.”

Marinette threw an arm around Nino’s waist and hugged him, the boy tensing in surprise at the sudden, affectionate gesture as she responded to Alya. “I know. Same to you. All of you. We’re a team.”

She hadn’t meant to say team but it had become habit with Cat, calling themselves a team or partners, and her eyes widened as she saw the quick glances all three of her close friends shared. A silent conversation passed before Jules moved toward her, ruffled her hair, and spun around. His back hit the white stairs leading up to her room just as he crossed his arms over his chest, the whole motion quick and agile.

His half-grin was full of mischief. “Teams need a name. I vote we call ourselves the Wolf Pack.”

Letting go of her, Nino spun to face him with a scoff. “Dude, that’s lame! Wolf Pack? We’re not a bunch of dogs.”

“He is.” Alya and Marinette spoke together, giving each other matching grins. 

Marinette had just leaned her arms on the counter next to Alya, reaching out for her tea, when her Dad kicked the door open gently with a large, black booted foot. He was carrying an assortment of mix matched boxes from the Bakery, all broadcasting the same symbol she had drawn that had become their logo. The golden wreathed T and S were beautiful and looked perfect on the white boxes. Her Dad’s large, bulky form wobbled as he tried to carry all of the boxes piled above his head into the living room and Marinette, tea forgotten, rushed to help.

She reached him, gaze steady on her Dad’s line of sight to make sure he wasn’t going to run into anything. “Pere, let me help!”

Tom shook his short brown hair, green eyes gazing down at her quickly as he gave her a half smile. “It’s alright, cherie. Go and have fun with your friends!”

Jules voice piped up from the stairs, teasing and light. “So how do you feel about us redecorating the living room into a fort, Papa?”

Tom laughed heartily and carried the boxes to the kitchen counter with Marinette guiding him by his elbow. Holding her hands against the boxes, Alya helped manoeuvrer them onto the smooth marble. The smell of buttery croissants, sweet Danish, and the blueberry muffins the Bakery was famous for wafted into her nose and she let her head fall to her Dad’s chest. She wrapped her arms around his broad middle in gratitude. 

“Merci, Papa.”

When his large, warm hand wrapped around her back to hug her shoulder, love for her Dad bloomed inside her and she held tight to him. His voice when he spoke was deep and vibrated his entire torso, his tone bright and body relaxed as he held her against his side. “You know what…..That’s a great idea, Jules!”

Pulling away, Marinette stared up at her Dad incredulously. “Don’t encourage him, Papa!”

Tom let his arm fall, tapped Marinette’s nose affectionately, and wandered back out the door of their apartment. His heavy footfalls faded into the hallway as Marinette turned and groaned loudly, “Juuuuuules!”

The moment she groaned Jules’ name, a foreboding feeling of cold dread settled hard in her stomach. Her bluebell gaze fell to the boy himself, his white-blonde hair glinting from the mid-day Sun, smile wide and bright. His cheeks were dimpled by his wide smile and Marinette tried to swallow past the terrible feeling in her gut. Just as her blue gaze fell from Jules to glance around the kitchen – Alya and Nino were standing side by side, leaning on the counter and talking animatedly with her Maman – all hell broke loose in the Dupain-Cheng home. There was never a moment Marinette had _ever_ feared Cat Noir, especially now she knew he was Adrien Agreste.

Except she had never thought she would ever have to fight him either. There was a cracking, splintering noise and time slowed as she turned her head. Her gaze met Jules’ confused light mocha gaze right before her hatch door split into millions of splintered, wooden shards and a black blur collided with Jules, slamming into him with such a force Marinette’s face paled and Alya screamed. Time resumed as if it had never stopped and Marinette’s knees shook as dread choked her throat. A cold panic seeped into her, freezing her in place as she heard Alya’s confused, fearful voice whisper, “Is that….Cat Noir?”

Fearful tears brimmed at the corners of her eyes as everything came into focus. Jules was stumbling around the living room, Cat Noir swinging his elongated claws towards Jules with a vicious ferocity that clawed up her ribs and chest in a painful, burning that stabbed her heart. She thought she may have heard her Maman gasp in fright but she was too focused on those black tipped claws swiping for Jules, his large body awkwardly bumbling around the living room as he tried to dodge. Her throat hurt when she realized he wasn’t fighting back, he didn’t _want_ to hurt Cat Noir. 

Something within her snapped, burning fire erupting in her gut and melting the cold, hard ball of dread and panic. Her fear was blasted by the sudden desire to stop the fight and save Adrien. Somewhere beneath that mask, hidden behind steely green irises of a dark beast, was her sweet Kitty who would never hurt anyone innocent. She took a step forward, waiting for an opening between the two fighting boys, but gasped when she felt the small pinch of the skin in the middle of her chest. Looking down, she met Tikki’s large, solemn blue eyes.

The small red kwami gently shook her head, her voice a bare whisper and just enough for Marinette to hear. “No, Marinette. You need to know why he’s attacking or he won’t be soothed. You can’t calm a wild animal without knowing what started their aggression.”

She peeked at her Mom and her friends, glad to see they weren’t paying attention to her and instead focusing on the fight and how to stop it, before she looked back down and hastily whispered, “But this isn’t a wild animal. This is Adrien, Tikki!”

“No. Right now, that is not Adrien. That is not Cat Noir. Can you look at him and tell me you see him in there?”

Marinette glanced up just as Cat Noir landed a slice near Jules’ left shoulder, nicking the edge of his jaw as well. Blood soaked his shirt instantly and Marinette’s face paled. Jumping over the sofa, Jules was a second too late to escape and hide before Cat Noir pounced and the two fell to the floor in a rolling, tumbling jumble of limbs. Alya went to run forward but Nino jerked her back, spinning her around and wrapping his arms around her, keeping her from the fight. He was keeping her safe and a moment later he gestured for Sabine to come under his left arm. 

She couldn’t ever remember being as grateful to Nino as she was in that moment for keeping them all safe. She looked down at the dark pools of her kwami and swallowed past the ache in her throat and the burn behind her eyes. “No, he’s not. That’s not my Adrien.”

Tikki nodded, slow and dejected, and sighed heavily before she told her, “Plagg told me before Adrien messaged your parents, he saw something in your phone that made Plagg worry. He never said what it was. Check your phone, there might be a clue in there to save him!”

Not hesitating a second more, she dug in the large black pants pockets before pulling out her phone. Swiping the screen, she tapped messages at the bottom and scrolled through until she found her Dad’s chat. She thumbed through and when she read something, it clicked in her mind. Eyes wide with realization and heart pounding at what she had just read, she let her phone clatter to the floor and glanced between the two, waiting for her moment to strike.

Cat Noir had Jules’ shirt gripped tight in one clawed hand, the other held back from delivering, what she realized with a heavy cold heart, a fatal blow by Jules’ two hands. He was pushing back with all his might, teeth grit and jaw tense, but his light mocha orbs weren’t afraid. Instead, her heart clenched when she saw the clear compassion and drive to save the hero from whatever was bothering him. She inhaled sharply when Jules pulled on Cat Noir’s wrist, jerking the boy forward, before he suddenly shoved him backwards with a loud grunt. 

Cat Noir went flying across the living room, sliding across the wooden floor with a loud screech of his claws. He stood to his feet and darted toward Jules, determined and green gaze focused on his prey. Stumbling to Cat Noir’s form, Marinette heard the shouts but she ignored them, lunging for the black form and wrapping her arms around his chest. She held tight, heart pounding in fear despite the fact she could never be truly afraid of him at the deep, rough growling her touch evoked. His body, even through the suit, was burning hot. 

The black spandex was stretched taut over his tight, tense body that was shaking with adrenaline and the dark power surging through his body. She could feel it. Tears swelling in her squeezed eyes, she spoke quick and loud to reach the boy she loved, pouring every ounce of emotion in her voice. “It’s okay, I’m okay! I’m right here! I’m okay!”

Whatever miracle she had been hoping for didn’t happen and instead, the darkness in his body surged, sparking angrily at her. His tail twitched in curt flicks, angry and fierce, and when his clawed hands dug into her shoulders she couldn’t help the cry of pain at the sting of claws piercing her tender skin beneath her shirt. Cat Noir froze above her and Marinette felt her tears fall, heart aching at the thought of Adrien behind the mask never being able to forgive himself. 

She couldn’t stop, forgetting everyone and everything but the burning, dark beast clutched in her embrace. “It’s okay. Jules would never hurt me! Jules didn’t attack me. He-I…..”

Marinette took a couple of deep breaths, fighting off the dark memories that threatened to break her, roiling up in her mind like venomous snakes. “I should have let him walk me home but I didn’t! It was _my_ fault! Jules is innocent, so, please, just…...”

Her emotions exploded as she shouted, tears burning her eyes and her throat, pain making her voice break and hitch. “Don’t hurt him!”

There’s quiet for so long and the sobs are building in her body but she pushes them back, her stomach clenching at the ache to cry. Marinette, lost to her emotions and the pain of her memories, says the only thing she can. “Please, Adrien, come back to me.”

It was like a spell being broken. His body went rigid, unmoving, and she felt his lengthened claws retract to their normal size but the hands holding her shoulders didn’t move. The darkness around him dissipated like smoke from a fire, coiling off of his body and into the air. She breathed a quiet sigh of relief and looked up into remorseful, ashamed green orbs and Marinette shook her head. “It’s okay, everyone’s fine.”

“…..Girl, I am so _not_ fine.” Alya’s hesitant yet firm voice cut through the quiet like a knife.

Horror dawned on her as her eyes widened, mouth dropping open as she realized she had just called Cat Noir by his civilian name in front of the whole room which included not only her best friends but his. And her Mother. 

She jerked away from Cat like she been burned, eyes wide, as she faced the room. Arms crossed and frowning, Alya made a terrifying picture. Nino was open mouthed staring at his best friend, jaw slack, and arms loose at his side. Her Maman’s expression ticked a check mark inside her mind. The small, curious tilt of her head and the small knowing smile on her lips as she took a sip calmly from her tea cup alerting the super hero teen to a dawning realization. 

She blinked in astonishment and asked, eyes steadfast on her Mother. “You….Know, don’t you?”

She didn’t have to clarify. The calmness of her Mother with Cat Noir being Adrien spoke volumes about what her Mother knew. She swallowed past the thickness in her throat but never got to speak, attention drawn to a deep sigh to her left. 

“M, girl, this is, like, really big.” Alya’s voice was not in it’s usual timber. 

The courageous and outspoken best friend was gone and in her place stood a subdued girl, her heart flooding out of her eyes like a lighthouse over the sea. Marinette’s heart plummeted to her feet at the sight of hurt glistening in Alya’s eyes. Her plaid shirt rustled as she dropped her arms to her jeans shorts, hands dug into the pockets as she looked away. Her head turned, the ponytail of thick auburn hair swishing with the motion, and Marinette instantly hated the fact that Alya wouldn’t look at her. Ever since they had met, the two had been inseparable as best friends and tears burned the bottoms of her eyes as she tried to think of some way to apologize.

But Alya didn’t give the chance before her quiet voice echoed over the room. “You could have been _hurt_ Marinette. And I wouldn’t have been able to do anything about it.”

She inhaled sharply when she realized Alya wasn’t upset about not being told that Marinette knew Cat Noir’s identity – like she had thought – but that Alya was afraid she would get hurt. And that meant more to Marinette than anything. She smiled past the tears welling in her eyes and walked forward, reaching for one of Alya’s hands. She pulled it from it’s hiding place in the pocket and held it with one of her own, giving a gentle squeeze. 

“I am always safe with Adrien. He would never hurt me. I’m sorry I never told you, there’s….” She hesitated, wondering what she could and couldn’t say. “There’s a lot more that I can’t say.”

“Well, if he’s protecting you, then I don’t see anything wrong with who he is or who he isn’t. As long as you’re safe.” 

Alya’s hand fell from her own when she turned to face Jules, the blonde boy smiling wide. He was standing from the fight, next to Cat whose ears were bent to his head and head tilted to the ground. She could see the balled up fists and the tension in his shoulders as Jules patted the superheroes back.

“Hey, it’s okay, no hard feelings!” Jules bent his head into Cat’s face, peering up with a wide grin and bright mocha eyes. “We can be best friends!”

Alya snorted and moved next to Marinette, leaning against her, and Marinette knew she was forgiven as the two boys snapped their heads to Alya at her teasing words. “That’s not hard, Jules could be best friends with a rock.”

Jules narrowed his eyes and stuck his tongue out childishly and Cat’s ears flicked, perking up a bit, as a small smile ghosted at his lips. “Don’t get jealous of my rock, LB!”

The banter was light, easing over the tension of the room, quieting the harsh truth of reality. Until Cat’s slit green orbs flew to Jules at the affectionate nickname he had given Alya and it took Marinette only a few seconds before she realized that he had called Ladybug that before. Cat looked at her from beneath black lashes and a black mask, gaze curious and confused, and a prick of weariness flowed over her. Looking down her shirt at the red kwami, Marinette didn’t even have to say anything. Tikki met her gaze and gave a slow bob, smiling up encouragingly to her. 

It was time. Time to reveal who she was to her friends and family. It should have made her happy, and she was! But Marinette felt the shackles of reality cuff around her wrists: once they knew, there was no going back. There was no going back to a time when they were the safest but, thinking back to a dark alley with no mask to protect her, a deep truth sunk into her bones. She could either pretend they would be safe all their lives or she could tell them the truth, trust them, and protect them the only way she knew how. 

Time to take responsibility. She looked up at Cat as her body relaxed, and gave him a firm nod. He looked at all the faces staring at him and she could see Adrien curling in on himself right as he mumbled something beneath his breath. The moment the yellow, black, and green magick swirled over his body, Jules squeaked and ran, ducking behind Alya who gave him an exasperatedly fond glare before looking back to the reveal of their friend. Marinette watched the familiar sparking hues of yellow and green, black sparkles outlining his body in a swirl of magick. 

Once the magick had faded into the air, Adrien Agreste stood in Cat Noir’s place. His green pools opened slowly and even from where she stood, Marinette could see the pink across his cheeks. His body was bowed into itself, head between his shoulders as he gave a nervous wave and a shaky smile. His black cat kwami wearily perched atop his golden hair, tail flicking back and forth anxiously. Green slit eyes found hers and Plagg blinked, understanding dawning in his luminescent orbs of what was happening. The walk toward Adrien felt slow, all the eyes of the room on her as she moved closer to stand beside him. 

She took a deep breath to steady her nerves, her hands trembling slightly as she looked down at Tikki’s large blue eyes one last time. She was ready, she could do this. Turning around, she looked up and smiled confidently up at Adrien whose entire posture relaxed at her smile. She slipped her hand into his to the shocked gasp of Nino and Jules, the ecstatic squeal of Alya, and the pleased gasp of her Mom. Curling his fingers around her own, the smile he sends back to her warms her from her toes to her head: trust. His green gaze was blasting that he trusted her to do what was right and the feeling inside of her burst like a firework that she _was_ doing the right thing. She hoped she wasn’t disappointing Master Fu but deep inside of her, she hoped he might actually be proud of her.

She opened the collar of her shirt with her free hand and nodded down, ignoring the confused stares of her friends. Tikki’s little red head bobbed back before she crawled out from Marinette’s bra and poked her head out of Marinette’s shirt. Her red antenna twitched as she saw the multitude of faces staring at her and giggled, looking up at Marinette with a small grin. 

“I think you broke them, Marinette. Maybe you had better explain?”

Marinette looked at her friends’ frozen expressions on the small red creature poking it’s head out of her shirt and this was the moment her Dad popped back into the room, arms loaded with pillows and blankets. He turned sideways when no one greeted him and looked at Marinette with a broad smile that stretched his moustache upwards. His gaze trailed from her face to the small kwami in her shirt who gave a small wave when she saw Tom meet her gaze.

“Hello, M Dupain! It’s a pleasure to finally meet you!”

He dropped the blankets and the pillows to the floor, lifted a shaking, thick finger at Tikki’s red form, and shouted with surprise, “W-What is that-that cat mouse thing!? Do you see it, Sab, do you?” At her Mom’s casual nod, Tom looked back at Tikki. “W-What are you?”

Tikki giggled and darted upwards from Marinette’s shirt, flittering from side to side in excitement, her antenna twitching at the top of her head. “My name is Tikki! I am a kwami. I grant powers, specifically of Creation and Luck.”

Adrien’s hand in hers was the only thing keeping her grounded to reality when her Mom stepped forward, smile still in place. She reached Tikki, holding up her cupped hands, and the small kwami floated to them, hovering above the small hands of her Mom. Sabine lifted her to eye level and then she laughed quietly before she asked, “So you’re the one whose been stealing the crumbs from the Bakery.”

Tikki laughed nervously but nodded. “I’m sorry! Cookies give me strength. The sugar in them keeps me energized and able to use my powers.”

Her Mom’s gaze was calculating but warm and when she turned, Tikki still clasped in her hands, Marinette’s heart thumped in nervousness. Feeling her anxious feelings welling up, Adrien gave her hand a squeeze as they watched her Mom set Tikki atop the counter – Jules, Alya, and Nino all stared down at her in confused and surprised silence – before she handed the kwami a cookie. 

Gasping in happiness, Tikki snatched the cookie with a quick thanks and chomped into it, humming at the sweetness of the chocolate chip cookies. Sabine watched Tikki with a wide smile before her eyes flicked up to Plagg sitting on Adrien’s hair, eyeing the room like a cat surveying it’s surroundings. When her gray eyes fell back to Marinette, she saw a flash through her Mother’s eyes and Marinette blinked rapidly past the warmth building behind her eyes. 

Coughing into a fist, all eyes turned to her as her Dad’s form cautiously approached Sabine from behind, settling his large hands atop her shoulders affectionately. He eyed Tikki dubiously whereas Jules was petting the top of her head as she nibbled the cookie, all eyes focused on Marinette. Through the cookie crumbs littering her face, Tikki still managed to convey the seriousness through her blue orbs. She gave her a single nod and Marinette found it spilling out before she could think.

“Tikki is a kwami and so is Plagg.” She gestured to the black cat sitting atop Adrien’s head. All eyes flicked to Plagg simultaneously and the cat God let out a squeak, burying himself into Adrien’s hair. Marientte giggled and all eyes fell back to her but this time, she was a bit more confident when she spoke. “Plagg helps Adrien transform into Cat Noir and his magick is what allows Adrien to have superpowers.”

Superhero junkie, Alya was quick to catch on and was the first to ask the question Marinette had been dreading. “Then who does Tikki belong to?”

Her eyebrows scrunched, Marientte was surprised Alya hadn’t figured out that Tikki belonged to Ladybug who was also Marinette but a lot had happened in the last few hours. The sun had begun to dip behind the horizon, casting a deep orange-yellow glow and she knew she had to say it quick before she lost her nerve. “Me.”

The room grew so quiet and thick, her throat closed up at the feel of the tense surprise emanating from them all as the truth dawned on them exactly what she was saying. Licking her paws, Tikki finished the cookie and darted to Marinette, settling atop her shoulder and giving her a neck a pat. 

Tikki uttered the last words to break the spell surrounding them all. “Marinette is Ladybug and I am her kwami.”

A pin dropping would have sounded like a bomb going off in the silence of the room, the air thick and heavy with tension and truth. Marinette expected a lot of reactions but the one she didn’t expect was her Mother’s. Sabine Cheng looked her daughter over once before a smile blossomed over her face. She raised the tea cup to her lips, smile dancing against the rim as she muttered, “I already knew that.”

The surprise in the room at her Mother’s declaration had gazes shooting to her and mouths slack jawed as they all tried to come up with how she knew. Reading their expressions she chuckled and answered, pleased and amused. “A Mother always knows her daughter. I didn’t know, right away. I suspected something. It became clear the more time went on. You are a terrible liar, Marinette, and excuses will only get you so far.”

Ashamed, she gave a pinched smile and looked at the ground, Adrien’s warmth encasing her protectively though he hadn’t budged. And sure enough, he spoke up in her defence moments later, his voice respectful but solid. “She didn’t want to lie to you. We had to, to protect you and us. But I guess the uh, cat’s out of the cage?”

His horrible pun made her groan habitually as she rolled her eyes and glared up at him. “A pun? That’s your response?”

Adrien shrugged nonchalantly, smile in place as he looked down at her out the corner of his eye. His expression screamed mischief and amusement and some part of her truly dreaded realizing the puns would now be endless, inside and outside of their masks. She rolled her eyes upwards again before she leaned sideways, her head falling against his shoulder. “You’re hopeless, Chaton.”

“Chaton? Pfft.” At the laughter, her eyes shot open suddenly remembering the room was filled with people they both knew. 

Adrien didn’t seem to care, his hand freed from hers had wrapped around her lower back, that hand resting on her hip, loose yet steady. Her heart pounded as she realized they looked like a couple and her eyes sought out the culprit of the laugh, glaring when she saw Jules innocently looking anywhere but at them. His eyes were flickering around the room, mouth pinched shut and hands clasped behind his back but it was the telltale twitching of his lips and the way he rocked back and forth on his heels that she knew it was him. 

“At least he’s got claws.” She mumbled.

He stopped rocking and looked at her, mouth agape and eyes innocently wide, shiny and sad, and she had to bite her lip to keep from squealing and rushing over to comfort him. Jules had really perfected that pout. “But I’m cuter!”

Sabine looked between the two then her smile turned devious and Marinette had to blink multiple times to make sure she wasn’t imagining her Mother’s nefarious look. “Now now, I know you’re her adopted brother but you don’t need to fight for her attention. She loves you both.”

Stuck in the boiling water of admitting her feelings for not only Adrien but that she did indeed see Jules as brother, Marinette realized where she acquired her mischievous streak from. Sighing, she threw her hands over her face. “I give up. I’m outnumbered.”

She heard the footsteps and when she peeked through her fingers, she expected to see Jules or her Mother. Instead she met the gaze of hazel-gold through black rimmed glasses gazing at her. Her eyebrows were drawn down and she wasn’t frowning but she wasn’t smiling either, thick auburn hair tied back to accentuate her features. Her eyes glowed dangerously and Marinette pulled her hands away, fidgeting them in front of her as she bit her lip. 

Adrien’s warmth next to her gave her some courage but she was completely unprepared for Alya’s next words. “You owe me an interview.” Her gaze snapped up to Adrien who inhaled sharply at her look being directed to him. She held up a finger and jabbed his chest. “You too, pretty boy. As Cat Noir, of course. And you as Ladybug.” 

The finger ended up pointing at her and she swallowed. “Aren’t you…..Mad?”

Alya held her finger there a minute before she sighed and dropped it, lifting her hands to scoot her glasses over her forehead to perch atop her pulled back locks. She rubbed at her eyes but smiled gently. “How can I possibly be mad when you’re out there saving the world? Find out my best friend is also the superhero I admire is actually pretty damn cool. And no matter whether you wear a mask or not, you’re still my best friend, M. That won’t change in or out of your spots.”

As she flung herself forward to hug Alya tight, laughing into her as they both squealed at the joy of finally knowing and no more lies, Marinette felt the memories of the night before like they had happened years ago. Dark and blurry around the edges, the attack was fading away like ashes into the wind. Love would save her and she had plenty of love. She pulled away slightly and gazed at everyone gathered in the Dupain-Cheng kitchen. Tom was hustling the blankets and pillows into a fort in the living room, lifting the small round table out of the way and scooting the couches closer together to create the walls and canopy. 

Her Mother was sitting on one of the couches, casually sipping her tea as Tom moved the couch with her on it, resulting in her parents sharing a quick affectionate kiss. Jules and Nino were standing near the TV and talking quietly. When Jules noticed her looking, he grinned and gave her a wave, his eyes bright and happy. She grinned back and he sent her a wink before he was roped back into conversation by Nino. Alya was standing to her right, their arms linked as they watched the living room be converted into fort. Adrien was to her left, standing awkwardly off to the side and before she could mention anything, Jules had launched across the living room. He lunged for Adrien, grabbed him and hoisted the teen model onto his shoulder, and marched to the fort being erected. Dumping him right onto her Dad’s hard work, Jules grinned and shouted at the top of his lungs, “PILLOW FIGHT!!”

It was like World War III erupted in her living room. Alya rushed from her side with a kiss to her cheek and an I love you into the fray, brandishing a pillow Tom had abandoned in the kitchen with a shriek of, “Be prepared to die, fools!”

Feathers and cotton exploded everywhere as everyone rushed for a pillow, including her Papa who was smacking her friends down right and left, a triumphant gleam in his eyes. She looked to her right to find Plagg and Tikki curled up asleep, bellies bulging and full from being stuffed of cookies. Sabine Cheng, still calmly sitting on the couch, simply watched the antics with a fond smile and Marinette was hit with the clarity of this moment: this was it. This was what life was really about. Friends, family, love. This is what her and Adrien fought to protect everyday and it was as if something broke free from her. 

There was no fear, no panic, no pain, no darkness lurking in her mind to prey on her weakness. The attack felt like years ago and her heart no longer ached at the thought of it. The past couldn’t touch her any more and she had her whole future to look forward to. The Miraculous still needed fixed, Tikki needed a check up with Master Fu, she had to face school at some point, and she owed everyone a deeper explanation. But right now, in this single moment of clarity, all she needed was a pillow fight at sunset, surrounded by the people she loved, healing with each smile and each laugh. 

And for once, Maarinette didn’t hesitate to throw herself into the flying feathers, grab a pillow, and smack Jules in the back of his head. He spun to face her, light brown eyes dancing before he grinned toothily and lunged for her. As he picked her up, carrying her weightlessly, all she could do was laugh. 

“Come take Red from me…...If you dare!”

As her and Jules were assaulted by the pillows, Marinette had never felt more at home. She was safe, she was happy, she was loved. 

And that was all that mattered.


	13. BONUS: Aftermath and Identity Reveals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonus Chapter: For those who were unsatisfied or wanted more, a bit more is revealed in this chapter following the ending of the last chapter.   
> While Marinette sleeps, a cat stalks his prey and the dog howls in doubt. Can the love between Life and Death heal what is broken, bring justice, and save the world?

He touched her face with the pad of his clawed finger, the cool leather of his suit absorbing the warmth of her skin. He brushed back a dark black, single strand of her hair from her face. Her mouth was slightly parted as she breathed evenly in her sleep. Her face was relaxed, her black lashes framing her freckled cheeks and hiding her bright bluebell orbs from him. Raking his slit green gaze over her face, he drank her in, starving for the image of her relaxed and peaceful. He remembered screams in the night, tore from her throat as if yanked from her heart. All he remembered was the pain in her voice as she cried out. He stared down at the gentle way she breathed, the rise and fall of her chest in a methodic manner, and he vowed to protect every bit of her from anything that wanted to harm her. 

Standing to his metal booted feet, Cat Noir stretched in the darkness of the Dupain-Cheng living room, his gaze roaming over all the slumbering forms huddled together. The floor was a cacophony of feathers, blankets, and pillows. A large, thin comforter was thrown over all the bodies, protecting their precious warmth from being snatched by the cold breeze of the Spring night. The arched window in the living room next to the TV stand was open, the white curtains billowing into the room like silky fingers reaching for the bodies curled in sleep. 

Alya and Nino were huddled together at a far end and Cat snickered at the sight his night vision afforded him. Nino was the one cuddled into Alya with a force that even in her fitful of sleeps wouldn’t have been able to dislodge him. He was clutching her and Alya’s form was splayed out, brows knitted as her captor refused to let her move in her sleep. Tom and Sabine were in the middle, on their sides, with Tom’s bulky frame encompassing his wife’s as if to shield her from the terrors of the night that might seek her out. Cat felt a pang of both bitterness and a sweet ache at the sight, knowing Marinette would never be afforded that peace.

Her attacker was still out there, somewhere, and Cat felt his claws dig into the tender flesh of his hands through the spandex leather coating his skin. His slits thinned and he felt the oceanic rage churning inside of him, tossing and turning like waves slamming into the shore. The light of the moon landed on the sleeping forms huddled in the fort they had built, the feathers of their Pillow War like bones glinting in the white of the moon’s light. He turned away, nauseous, and looked out at Paris. Her streets were dark and vacant but the music of this city was buried in the cobbled streets, carrying on through the night in a silent orchestra. 

Taking in a breath cold air, Cat Noir felt the skeletal fingers of night brush through his hair, whispering that all he had to do was jump. Jump, run, and _hunt_. He could hunt the boy down and then-and then…..What? Cat dug a clawed hand into the frame of the window, gritting his teeth against the onslaught of emotions. He wanted to protect her, he wanted to avenge her, he wanted to make her feel safe. 

He was startled out of his musings by the soft, sleepy voice from his right. “She would never forgive you.”

He didn’t need to look to know who was beside him, staring out at Paris coated in the blanket of night. His claws dug deeper into the wood. “What am I supposed to do? He’s out there. And what’s stopping him from trying again?”

The small red kwami darted up into his face with a fierce speed that he nearly stumbled back, blinking rapidly at the little God. In the short amount of time he had known Tikki, he had never seen her this focused or serious, and the fact that this usually happy God was now glaring – he would never admit to how much her glare actually terrified him – sunk into his bones. “What will beating him up do? And…..Will you stop at that?”

Swallowing past the lump in his throat, he looked away. His gaze fell on Marinette’s body, knees pulled to her chest defensively, as a gentle protectiveness flowed through him. “I want to help her, Tikki. I’ll do anything.”

The small God looked at the couch behind him with a wince and when he turned, he saw his phone lying on the edge. A notification bubble was on the screen and he looked away, back out over Paris and avoiding the blue gaze glued to him. She didn’t say anything else and when he felt her presence disappear from him, he relaxed the tension he hadn’t realized he had been holding onto. His mind flickered back to the notification bubble. He felt despair clawing at his ankles like a hungry dog, remembering his promise to Natalie and what that entailed. If he didn’t do something now…..

He hopped onto the edge, clawed hands clutching the sill of the window. His booted feet were curled over the ledge, keeping him balanced. His tail furled and unfurled behind him in slow, lazy motions as the cold breeze whistled over the leather suit. Dark magick clung to his body, sinking into his skin and into his blood. This is what he was meant to do, what he was meant to be: not just a superhero but a protector. He leaned forward, chin tilted toward the moon in the sky and slit gaze facing the Pont de la Tournelle. The air was thick with the heavy storm the night before, gray-black clouds passing through the night sky and covering up the sparkling stars. 

His claws relinquished their tight hold, his grip lessening, as he leaned over a bit more. His crouched body twisted lithely forward, tail curling up into his back. His ears twitched at the cold air blowing over them, caressing them with it’s icy fingers. He shook his head, golden hair swishing, and bent down his ears. It muffled the wind a bit and kept the cold from blowing inside. But it also blocked out the muted sound of Tikki phasing through Marinette’s trap door. Engrossed in his perusal of the night, he didn’t notice when the kwami hovered next to him, whispering his name. He did, however, notice when she flew straight into the bottom edge of his jaw. 

Yelping, he snapped wide green orbs to her, immediately lifting a hand for her to drop into when he saw the sweat dotting her head. She landed with a soft thud and he flicked his ears up, listening for the sound of disturbed sleep. When he was confident no one had woken, he looked back to Tikki. Clutched in her paws were two cracked, colourless Miraculous earrings. They had once been red with black spots but that was a distant, faded memory to what they were now. Soulless and blank, the earrings looked, as every ounce an inanimate object can be, dead. 

Black and gray replaced the vibrant and contrasting red and black spots. White cracks littered the entire surface, still glowing slightly from the magick that had burst from inside. They looked burned and faded and utterly destroyed. 

He drew up his gaze – forcing his eyes away from the sight of the dead Miraculous – to Tikki who stared back at him, solemn. “This is what love can do. As much as it can heal, it can equally destroy.”

Cat’s gaze, like a moth to a flame, was drawn back to the cracked earrings. Something whispered in his gut, inside of him, and he blinked in confusion. The more he stared, the more the earrings drew him in. The magick of Life and Luck swirled out of them in small wisps and when a single tendril touched his leather clad thumb, he shivered. And then it hit him. Tikki’s words snapped into place and rushed through him. 

He looked at the earrings, shame and guilt making him unable to look into the wise, kind God who had saved him from making a horrible mistake. “Love can destroy as much as it heals.”

He wasn’t sure why he repeated it but Tikki seemed to understand. She gave his cupped palm a gentle pat and whispered, “To destroy in the name of love is to also be destroyed by it.”

Gathering his courage, he looked at Tikki and his breath hitched. This wasn’t a small, red ladybug sitting in his cupped palm with her broken Miraculous cracked and burnt; this was the Goddess of Life and Luck, of happiness and creation. Her red antenna were blowing gently behind her in the Spring breeze, the cool air washing away the sweat dotting her forehead. Her red glowed vibrantly in the light of the moon, glimmering ethereally, and her body seemed to emanate a sparkling aura. A wistful smile completed the visual, with large expressive blue that surged with strength and wisdom. Her blue orbs slowly met his and her smile twitched upwards more into a small grin.

“You got it. Plagg likes to think I don’t notice. But I do.” Her eyes softened and Cat felt his cheeks flush beneath his mask. “I know how he feels about me. 3000 years of it, actually.”

Shifting her red legs beneath her she lifted her head towards the sky. The silvery light of the moon washed down on her and her lids slowly fell closed. Cat swallowed past the thick ball of nervousness at the power this small creature – God, he amended – exuded. “Then, why haven’t you told him you know? Isn’t that….Rude?”

She giggled but didn’t open her eyes, the breeze of Spring flapping the curtains behind them in wings of cotton. “There is too much at stake. To tell him I know of his feelings would hurt him more than him believing I don’t know. Tell me, Cat, answer me one thing: what happens if Death were to ever fall in love with Life?”

He blinked quickly before he peered out at the same sky, searching for the answer in the stars. They remained quiet and the wind brushed against his cheeks, the cold making them redden. He thought deeply about Tikki’s heavily loaded question, the answers evading him like water slipping through the cracks in his fingers. 

He inhaled deeply and sighed out his nose in frustration, tail twitching in aggravation. “Then they could be happy.”

Tikki’s laugh was bright and filled with Life, with the very magick she was, and Cat found his heart thundering in his chest at the sound. But there was a heaviness in the air that was nothing like her laugh. “How long does happiness last? Cat-No, Adrien. If Death ever fell in love with Life…..The whole balance of the world would be destroyed. Because how could Death ever destroy what Life created with her hands, if he loved her? But if he never knows, then, he will do his job. Death will take from Life _because_ he loves her, because it is what she needs from him.”

He understood. The words sank heavily in his chest but he uttered them through the iron ball in his throat and dry mouth. “Or he will be destroyed by love itself.”

Her eyes finally opened and those expressive blue orbs looked at him, her head turning to face him. He dropped his gaze to hers and the sad, forlorn pinch of her lips sent a hot pressure straight to the backs of his eyes. 

Nodding, Tikki wrapped her red paws around herself. “He is Destruction and I am Creation. He is Death and I, Life. We must do our duties or we will be destroyed by what remains. And love is a tricky thing for even us Gods. Don’t worry, Adrien. The Miraculous can be fixed. Take them to Master Fu, he can guide you further.”

Slowly, the little kwami stretched before she floated upwards and turned, heading back towards the huddled form of Marinette in the mound of pillows and blankets. She paused before she looked back, eyes bright in the moonlight, the cracked Miraculous heavy in the palm of his hand. “You make a great Cat Noir, Adrien. Take care of Marinette.”

He swallowed but no matter how much he pushed the lump in his throat down, his voice still came out clogged and he still felt like he was suffocating. “Always. And, uh, thanks, Tikki.”

He turned to leap out the window to the side of the building across from the Bakery when he paused, eyes dilating as a thought began to form in his head. Life and Death, huh? Cat Noir grinned into the night as he whispered back to the God he knew was listening, “Death doesn’t destroy Life’s creation’s out of duty or love. He doesn’t even destroy them.”

There was tension filled pause and the only sound was the wind in the curtains, the flowing water of the Seine below, and the pulsing magick left in the air. Deep inside the suit, he felt Plagg’s magick – thick, dense, and desolate – skittering through his body and across his skin beneath the suit. The black cat had heard her and the bittersweet ache that coursed through and twisted, mingling with his own emotions, made the words pour from his lips like forbidden nectar. “Death takes those little pieces of Life and he holds them inside of him. If the only touch of Life he is allowed is the caress of her, then that is what he will take. Love is ageless, unconditional, and so is Death. Goodnight, Tikki.”

~ * ~

He waited until he saw Cat Noir leap out into the night before he followed close behind, keeping back and away from the cat heroes sensitive nose and ears. His own pair of golden-brown ears twitched against the top of his shiny, gold tipped hair. The ears were round and upright with small tufts of fur tickling the insides. The cold breeze brushed past him as he followed the elusive cat through Paris’ streets. His mask was shaped a lot like Cat Noir’s and it ended at the very tip of his nose. Three sharp points of fur brushed the sides of his cheeks from his mask as the wind pressed against him and he grinned at the feeling. 

There was a white diamond shape in the middle of his mask that flowed in a single line down the bridge of his nose, arcing to the right and left of the mask to frame the tops of his cheeks. Three small drops above his eyes in the mask were a shimmering silver colour that glinted in the moonlight. He shook his head when Cat Noir picked up the pace and pushed his body, staying well behind the superhero but keeping pace. As he darted after Cat, his golden dog tag hanging from a light brown collar around his neck glinted in the light. The name etched into it – with even a little heart at the end – made him smirk at the name of his kwami: Barxx was a tough God and held no sympathy for stupid, reckless decisions.

He winced as Cat began to shake sharp turns, following suit, at the thought that _this_ was a reckless decision and when the mask was off, well, he was a little afraid his kwami might kill him. The magickal suit that encased him was thrumming with a powerful energy like a flowing river or sitting in the shade on a really hot day: peaceful but powerful. The magick that flowed through his veins was like the currents of the ocean, rushing through his blood. Determination powered through him as he ducked atop one of Paris’ many roofs, watching as Cat Noir entered through the back of the Chinese medicinal acupuncture shop.

He crouched there, waiting until he saw the lights flicker on, before he stood to his feet. He stretched upwards, grunting at the feel of his muscles twisting beneath the soft spandex of his gold-brown suit. From the collar, the suit stretched over his chest and his arms, the tight spandex warm against his cool body. His suit was unlike Cat Noir, Rena Rouge, or Ladybug’s in the fact that his had a small coating of fur, soft and silky to the touch. A white, diamond-like strip started from where the collar connected to the suit that trailed down to the middle of his stomach. 

The rest of the torso of the suit was a golden-brown colour. His long arms had a white strip that branched from the collar and down to the edge of his hands, ending right before his fingers began. The suit stretched over his fingers, small white pads on the ends of his fingers and in the middle of his palm, but unlike Cat Noir he had no claws. There was a single white strip down the middle of his lean legs, ending at his padded feet. He shivered at the sudden feeling of a twitch behind him, looking back hesitantly at the one thing he still hadn’t quite come to terms with. Super powers? Sure! Awesome spandex suit? Great. Kwami God Barxx that isn’t afraid to, ha, bark orders? Even better! 

But looking back at the long, thick fluffy tail with the single white stripe down it he wished there had been limitations. What even good was a tail in a fight against evil? Shaking his head, his ears flicking, he turned back to face the shop. Steeling himself for what was to happen next, he crouched low and jumped, hands first, to the ground of the alley below. He made a small thud and froze, ears upright and body tense, but when no one rushed out screaming he relaxed and stood back to his full height. Releasing the breath he hadn’t known he had been holding, he fidgeted with the bracelet around his left wrist.

Glancing down at it, he smiled, feeling in awe of the power he had been granted by this small accessory and the God held within. It was a small, dark brown bracelet curved around his wrist with a few golden rings in the middle. Two gray-silver dog heads were at each end but not connected, their muzzles an inch or two from each other. This is what had started his Miraculous journey and if only he had known how to be a hero, how to harness the power, then maybe – 

“It’s time.”

The quiet voice of the one who had granted him this power made his head glance up, light eyes glinting from the dim lights of the shop. Stood in the doorway was a small, elderly Chinese man. He looked frail with holding a cane in one hand and leaning on the door with the other but this hero knew better. Master Fu didn’t have to put on a mask to be a hero and fool everyone into pretending he was an innocent old man. He smiled crookedly at him, one hand scratching the back of his neck. “He isn’t going to punch me, is he?”

Master Fu’s eyes twinkled and the smile he gave the Dog hero was mischievous, playful, and he stepped backwards into the open door. He gestured with one arm inside. “I cannot control others’ actions, only my own. But I assure you, this is a safe place for you.”

He looked at the light lit from inside the shop and gulped, his palms going sweaty through the spandex of his suit as he tried not to let his nerves rile up but his stomach gave a somersault to prove just how much he was failing. He had a secret, one he knew Master Fu and Barxx would both heartily disagree to. He hesitated, wondering if this was right and not some huge mistake that he was Chosen and he couldn’t really do this after all – 

A small smile, loose black hair, and sparkling blue eyes flashed through his mind, her laughter in the candlelight igniting a painful ache inside of him. He had failed to protect her, unable to be a hero for her when she had needed him, and when he thought of her, he saw his Mother: family. Someone he would die for, someone he would face down all of the world to protect. 

When he looked up, Jules Moreau towered to his full height, eyes bright and determined. “I’m ready.”

Well, time to face the cat and see if cats and dogs _could_ get along. 

…….The answer was no, no they could not. As soon as he stepped foot into the room where Cat Noir was standing, hands behind his back and examining the ancient Chinese paintings of the Miraculous hung on the wall, Jules knew it wouldn’t end well. He coughed into a fist, Master Fu a silent sentry beside him. Cat Noir turned, his glowing green eyes shinning and his head cocked to the side when he saw Jules standing there. He towered over them both and maybe it was his height that gave him away or the odd colour of his eyes from behind his mask but when Cat Noir’s green slits landed on him, they narrowed dangerously. 

His congenial smile fell into a half frown-half snarl as he glared darkly up at him. Jules was a big guy and not much scared him but Cat Noir _terrified_ him. It was the dark, deadly look he had glimpsed in those orbs as claws had raced towards his body. Something dark lurked beneath Cat’s mask and Jules was scared of _that_. He squeaked when Cat Noir took an angry step forward but both of them were halted by the cane that tapped the ground between them. In an instant both boys found themselves jolting in surprise at the shock of magick that surged through them. 

Cat Noir’s eyes fell to Master Fu, his cane resting beneath his hand again. “What was that?”

Looking at his cane, Master Fu shrugged but when he looked up his old gaze said he knew _exactly_ what he had done. “Who knows, this place is so old after all. Sometimes the best option is not always the easiest to agree with. Sit, both of you. We have much to discuss.”

Cat Noir looked like he wanted to argue but he simply closed his mouth, took a deep breath, and slumped onto the tatami mat floor with his arms crossed and tail swinging behind him in wide, angry arcs. Shoulders slumping, Jules hesitantly approached the angry cat and sat next to him, hyper-aware of the dark magick coursing through the suit next to him. The difference was shocking. Barxx’s magick was thick but warm and rushed through him like water. Cat’s magick was dark and suffocating, sparking and deadly. Refusing to look up, Jules stared hard at the tatami floor, determined not to make things worse until he could speak to Cat Noir alone.

But cat’s never do what they’re told. “You’re going to hurt her.”

Her went unspoken as to who she was but both boys knew exactly who he meant. His temple throbbed as a headache formed and he brought his gaze up to the cat who was pointedly looking at him from the corners of his eyes. 

That accusing, angry look snapped what little patience he may have had and he could feel Barxx’s irritation the moment he opened his mouth. “I would never hurt Red. Ever. I feel bad about last night as it is. I could have saved her. But I would _never_ hurt her.”

Cat judged him, gaze narrowing slightly in thought, before he sighed heavily and faced him. His tail twitched behind him, curling curtly back and forth in clear agitation. Jules felt his ears fall to his head as his thick, bushy tail drooped down to curl against his legs. 

Cat’s gaze was unwavering and unflinching. “That’s not what I mean. When she finds out you knew about the Miraculous, you’re going to hurt her.”

There was a threat lingering in those green eyes and Jules smiled sadly, thinking of the way she had been laughing against his shoulder during the pillow fight and the blanket of comfort that had fallen over him in the Dupain-Cheng home. “Yeah, she’ll be upset. She’ll be mad. But she will understand. You know her just as well as I do. She didn’t cut you out of her life, did she? And trust me, I’ll be fighting for her every step of the way, whether she likes me or not.”

An approving hum brought both boys’ eyes up to see Master Fu wielding a knowing smile as he gazed back and forth between them. He nodded before he lowered himself to sit at the opposite side of the round table they were seated at. “You’ve both grown since you received the Miraculous. It was the right choice.”

Cat, still angry about Jules, huffed and nodded his head curtly toward the tall boy next to him. “Think you made a mistake with this one.”

Jules winced and looked at the floor, lips pursed as he tried to swallow past the hot, bitter lump in his throat. Maybe he really _didn’t_ belong here, in this world, with Marinette and her family, as a hero. Just as he felt his chest tightening, a loud snap made him jump as he brought his gaze back up with wide eyes. Master Fu’s cane was on the table and his wise stare made them both fidget. His eyes were narrowed and his lips were in a thin line and the disappointment was tangible in the air, hanging over both heroes like a suffocating blanket. 

Jules was the first to speak. “Sorry.” Lifting his gaze, he looked at Cat Noir with a sort of half smile, eyebrows raised, his mocha eyes friendly. “Friends?”

Cat hesitated but then his green irises fell to something clutched in his right hand, fisted in his lap, and Jules blinked in surprise at the change that overcame him in seconds. Cat’s shoulders drew back and his spine straightened, tail curling against his back. His ears perked upwards, that clawed hand clutching what was held inside a bit tighter before he looked up. That was not the look of a teenage boy that met his. Cat stared back as the hero he was, not a hint of fear or anger or self doubt. 

He gave a single nod. “Acquaintances. For the record, I still don’t like dogs.” A small, slow, and teasing smirk broke apart his lips as he winked towards Jules, the taller teen thrown off by the sudden change. “I’m more of a cat guy myself.”

He barked out a laugh and grinned, holding up his hand for a high five. “That was good!”

Adrien blinked, rapidly, before he slapped his hand to Jules’ and shrugged like he didn’t know what to say. “Ladybug hates my claw-some puns.”

Snickering, Jules gave his shoulder a friendly pat. “Oh, dude, no, they’re great!”

The two shared a look and then a nod of camaraderie before they turned back to Master Fu, smiling. Cat leaned forwards, his forearms on the table, and met Master Fu’s gaze evenly. “Now, me-own to business.”

Master Fu laughed, deep and from his belly, and both boys brightened at hearing the sound from the man who had gifted them with their amazing powers When he found the strength to wipe the tears from his eyes, Fu held out a hand atop the table. “Let me see them, Cat Noir.”

His eyebrows furrowed as he glanced between Cat and Fu, trying to understand what was going on. It all hit him when Cat unclenched his clawed hand and let two shattered, cracked, and dull earrings fall into Fu’s smaller, wrinkled hand. The moment they hit his skin, Fu’s smile dropped as he pulled the Miraculous closer. Lifting them up, his eyes softened when he saw the damage. Even from across the table, Jules flinched. The damage was severe and the magick that had been there – sparkling, sweet, and gentle like the girl who wielded them – was gone. The cracks were long and some pieces were missing. 

They looked burnt and faded and shattered. Like the girl who had been attacked, the girl he should have walked home. The girl who had risen from her own ashes, stronger and more passionate than before. He swallowed past the pain in his chest and mumbled, “Can you fix them?” 

Fu’s dark brown eyes were heavy when he looked up at the two of them and Jules tensed, his heart flopping to his feet and his stomach bottoming out. Was this really Marinette’s future? To not only be robbed of her safety but her powers? What would be left for her to hold onto? Question after question raced through his head and he clenched the hands that rested in his lap into tight fists as he looked pleadingly at the only one who could help them. There had to be away to fix the Miraculous and Jules was going to find it. 

Fu noticed – he _always_ noticed – and smiled but it didn’t reach his wise, dark orbs. He sighed deeply and put the broken earrings on top of the table with a clink, pushing them gently back toward Cat Noir. “I’m afraid these are beyond my capabilities. Is Tikki alright?”

Jules looked down at Cat when he responded, his voice defeated and his shoulders slumped. His back trembled and Jules’ own light brown eyes welled with tears. Hesitantly he reached out, settling his large palm against the black spandex of Cat Noir’s suit. The warmth of his own power surged forward, Cat’s dark magick pushing back as Jules offered what little comfort he could. 

Cat’s voice vibrated his back and the large palm against the suit. Jules kept his eyes trained to the floor, not trusting himself to speak with his heart lying in pieces at his knees. “She’s weak but she’s awake. And alive.”

The room grew silent but it wasn’t an easy silence. This quiet was thick and suffocating, weighing heavily on Jules’ shoulders. His tail curled up tighter against him as tears stung his eyes. He blinked them back and swallowed the painful lump lodged in his throat, the ache travelling straight from his throat to the beating heart on the floor. Nausea rumbled in his gut and he squeezed his eyes closed which ended up a massive mistake. The moment his lids closed, Marinette’s face flashed through his mind and his heart jumped back into his chest, catching in his throat. Marinette was no longer Ladybug. She had lost not only a piece of her innocence but the one thing that she _needed_ to keep going. 

Behind his eyes, a gentle sparkling light appeared and at first, he cocked his head gently to one side in confusion. Realizing the small, glowing light show of white and black was _not_ in his mind, he opened his lids slowly, unprepared for the sight that greeted him. His eyes shot open and his mouth parted, hands uncurling, as he gazed in wide-eyed wonder at the sight before him. Slowly, he took a quick glimpse at Master Fu to see the old man’s hands clasped atop the table, leaning on his elbows and his forearms as he watched the spectacle himself. His wise gaze met Jules and his smile widened, soft and knowing, and Jules felt like the most insignificant person in the room. Here he was, moping and angry, when Master Fu and Cat Noir were being _real_ heroes, heroes Marinette needed.

And the only thing he knew about being a big brother, about being family, was that you always protect them. He looked back at the magick swirling quietly up into the room, dancing toward the ceiling. The lanterns of the room had blown out – probably a force of the magick and the cold wind that had steadily picked up outside – allowing the darkness to surround them. It’s dark, cold fingers reached for them at the table where the only light source was held in the palms of Cat Noir. Ladybug’s shattered earrings were in both of his palms, the backs of his hands flat against the table. His slit gaze was intent but hazy, as if he was seeing but not aware of his actions. From his suit, from his body, black tendrils were curling into the broken earrings.

When the shadowy magick of Cat Noir entered them, the tendrils exited in the form of a sparkling white mist, hovering up to the ceiling like smoke from an incense stick. The white magick was bright and light, airy, and the black magick was thick and slow like oil. The two danced together, twisting and turning, and from the joining of Life and Death came the miracle they had been hoping for. Tiny almost non-existent red and black ladybugs hovered and darted around the broken earrings, the cracks of white slowly receding. As the cracks faded, the earrings began to shine and as the pressure in the room dropped, taking Jules’ breath with it, the magick suddenly slammed downwards, spiralling into the earrings. For a moment, there was nothing. No sound, no feeling, no words, nothing but the earrings. 

And then a burst of light and magick and ladybugs erupted in a circle, flying outwards. Leaving behind a shimmering gleam, Ladybug’s earrings slowly fell back against Cat Noir’s open palms, whole and new. Except this time, between the two earrings, lie a product of Life and Death, Ladybug and Cat Noir, and Jules wasn’t ashamed at the broad smile he boasted or the tear that fell from his eyes. Sitting between the earrings was a ring, small and dainty, and Jules bet it would fit Marinette’s finger like a glove – and he knew exactly which finger it would go to.

The band was an inch thick with shimmering, glittery ladybugs in a line along both sides, circling the outer edges of the ring. In the middle was the image of a black cat in motion, running beside the ladybugs. A team, partners, of Life and Death. All eyes stared at the ring and the earrings in his palms, Cat Noir slowly blinking back to the present. Jules looked sideways, smiling wide and tapping his fingers against his suit as he waited to see the reaction of what Cat Noir had done. Cat’s luminescent green eyes stared long and hard at the jewellery before a small smile curled at his lips. 

He looked up and met Jules’ eyes, confident smile in place, as he held up the earrings in a single palm. They glittered, shiny and gleaming, in his palm like stars. Jules’ grin nearly split his face apart as he slammed his hands down on the table, leaning over to look at the Miraculous. His cheeks hurt and his jaw ached from his smile but the Miraculous were fixed: Marinette was still Ladybug! 

Cat grinned up at him and the two shared an ecstatic high five. The excitement and happiness was clear in the tone of Cat’s voice. “Love can heal just as much as it can destroy.”

Both boys heads snapped to the loud guffaw that erupted from across the table. Fu had a hand held over his mouth, his moustache twisted up into a broad smile. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he looked between the two of them. “Wise words. Remember them. If she’s giving out sage advice, Tikki is probably fine but let Marinette know she is free to come as often as she likes. As are all of you.”

Fu bowed his head to the heroes before him and Jules sat back, smile turning sheepish as he fidgeted in his spot. Cat bowed his head in return, ears bent down to his head out of respect, and Jules realized with a numb sort of certainty that he really _didn’t_ belong here. Cat was suave, witty, Rena Rouge was mysterious but strong, and there was Ladybug who was purity and life, the hope of Paris. Then there was Jules: WolfsBane with no idea how to use his powers, what they were, and as the dark thought from earlier crept back into his head, whispering encouragement, he felt out of place. It was like Cat and Fu had a sort of bubble and he was there but not the same. He was _weaker_. 

Looking away from the chuckling Cat, Jules hastily stood to his towering height, gave a quick bow, and fought off the tears burning his eyes. He spun around and darted out the open doorway into the cold night air, bounding up onto the roof of the Chinese healing shop. The clouds had parted and deserted their post in the sky, leaving the half-full moon to shine down upon him. The moon ws wrapping her light around him as he sagged against the chimney of the roof, sliding until he was sitting with his back to the brick. The cold sunk through his suit and his tail was getting soaked from the moisture of the rain that had fallen before, staying on the roof. The small pools of rain reflected the shimmery light of the moon and Jules pulled his knees up tight to his chest, burying his head into them.

Ever since he was little, he had been a silent crier. His Mom was the most important person in his life – he had never really connected with his Father; he loved him but there wasn’t a _bond_ – and to not worry her, he had learned to hide his tears. His body didn’t shake as he sobbed silently, mouth in a parted grimace, eyebrows squeezed tight against his forehead. The mask was a heavy shackle on his face and the suit no longer felt warm or like home; it felt like a dead weight he was carrying because how could he have ever thought he could do this?

His thick, fluffy tail curled up against him as if sensing his pain, and Jules simply let the moonlight fall from his eyes. Heart breaking, he whispered to the cold night, “Barxx, Heel.”

The magick coursing over him faded into a dull throb as a heavy weariness crawled over his skin. The magick receded, taking with it not only his suit but his strength. His body sagged into itself as he buried his head deeper into his folded arms and tight knees. Goosebumps prickled his body as the cold wind nipped at his body like a hungry dog taking bites from his skin. Sharp and cold. It wasn’t long before he heard the telltale sigh of his kwami and the sound made him flinch as if struck. Just another person disappointed in him.

He expected her to leave him be but she didn’t. Barxx darted into the crevice between his stomach and his knees, right over his diaphragm. She nestled against his upper thighs, using his shirt as a makeshift blanket against the cold. 

Once she was comfortable, she bit at him. “What the hell do you think you’re doing out here? It’s freezing. You’ll catch a cold.”

He didn’t lift his head and closed his eyes, skin prickled from the cold as he fought back a shiver at the wind that brushed against him with icy fingers. “Don’t care. Need to think.”

Her sigh was laced with disappointment and Jules clutched his body tighter together, huddlign deeper into himself, and Barxx snapped at him. “Stop doing that!”

“Well, you’re right, it is cold.” He mumbled.

A moment later, his eyes snapped open as two small paws grabbed his face. Her grip, despite being a tiny kwami, was strong and firm. Barxx was unlike any other kwami in the fact that she said what she wanted, when she wanted, how she wanted. She was wise but her wisdom often was blunt, harsh, but sometimes, it was exactly what he needed. Barxx was his opposite but she was also the only one who understood him better than he had ever understood himself.

And that was why her next words, harsh and biting, ricocheted inside his heart at the truth in them that he had been trying to run from. “You _know_ that’s not what I’m talking about, Ju. Listen, I didn’t think this would work either. Wang is not usually wrong but we didn’t exactly match up well those first few days, did we? But, here we are, working together and in harmony. Like you were meant for me and I was meant for you.

I don’t believe in Fate or none of that stuff Wang spouts off. But what I _do_ believe in,” Her bright amber eyes glowed like fire and Jules found it burning away all his insecurities. “Is us. You. Me. Us. As a team. You may not be what I would have chosen but guess what? If it hadn’t been you, we wouldn’t be here. So, I ask again, WolfsBane: what the hell are you doing out here?”

Jules lifted his head, looking down at the kwami who was floating in the gap between his chest and his pulled up knees. The moonlight fell on her golden-brown fur, narrowed amber gaze focused on him, and he swallowed past the bitterness of his thoughts lodged in his throat. “Because I just…..I failed, Barxx. I failed Red, I failed myself, I failed you…...What good am I as a hero if I can’t _save_ people?”

Barxx’s stare both softened and hardened at the same time. The amber of her irises darkened as a small silence fell between them, tense and laced with the words he had dared to utter. The knot in his throat was tight and suffocating as his eyes stung with hot, wet tears. He looked Barxx over as the moon’s light shifted over her fur in the cold wind. Her paws were crossed over her chest and the wind ruffled her upright, fluffy ears. The tufts of fur off the side of her face rustled in the cold breeze but the kwami didn’t seem to even care about the cold or the wind. Her gaze remained focused, intent and steady, on him and Jules swallowed at the pain in his chest. She had stared at him this way once before: when they had first met.

She had been released, arms crossed, amber gaze hard and narrowed on him as she declared Master Fu was wrong. It had stung but he had also been more amazed at the fact that this tiny little animal – a God he later found when he mistakenly called her an animal – lived inside a bracelet. He had been sworn to secrecy and Barxx had, begrudgingly, allowed him to transform. She was looking at him now in that same way: hard and focused, disappointment lacing the edges of her eyes and the way her eyebrows tilted inwards slightly. He clenched his hands into fists as he stared down at her. She let the silence carry before she spoke.

“And what do you expect? Let me guess,” She held up a paw. “To save everyone and be a hero? To keep your friends happy, alive? To defeat Hawkmoth and save all of Paris?”

He didn’t say anything but he didn’t have to: Barxx could read him like a book. He didn’t want fame. He wanted to _protect_. And like always, she tore down the illusion of his dreams, shattering them at his feet. “You can’t, Jules. You can’t save everyone. People are going to get hurt. They may even die.” He winced and her arms loosened slightly, her frown edging back into a small, thin line. “You cannot hope to save everyone. You cannot be hero without loss. You cannot expect to win every fight. Victory is not always about the battle. Sometimes, victory is about being alive at the end of the war.”

Her voice had softened and Jules curled his knees up tighter, pressing her towards his chest and she chuckled, amber eyes lifting up to his with a soft warmth that made him smile. “This is why you are my Chosen. Because where I am hard and weary you are soft and hopeful. We can’t win every time, people are going to get hurt, _you_ are going to hurt. The people you love might die. But right now, this is the only time I have ever been disappointed in you, Jules. I,” The little kwami looked down at his chest, avoiding his eyes, her tail curling around her protectively. “I can’t do this without you.”

Jules laughed, letting his head fall back against the brick of the chimney, broad smile ghosting over his face and tears budding at the corners of his eyes. She was right. She was always right. He lifted a large hand to curl around her and she fell into his palm. Barxx was no cuddler and she didn’t initiate any contact other than lying in his palm but somehow, Jules felt more connected to his kwami than he ever had before. She had shattered him only to build him back up and that was what he loved about her. 

He closed his eyes, voice rough but strong. “I’ll do better. I’ll be better. I may not be able to save everyone but I’m gonna try. I’m gonna stop Hawkmoth. And I may not be able to be like Cat Noir or Ladybug but….I am not gonna give up.”

Barxx snorted but traces of amusement clung to her voice. “Stubborn, stubborn dog.”

He grinned into the night, eyes closed. The cold of the brick behind him sunk into his head, clearing the hot mess of his thoughts. Evil lurked out there and not just Hawkmoth or akuma. And he was going to save as many people as he could. Starting tonight, right now, he was going to win his first battle. 

Sensing where his thoughts had gone, Barxx stilled in his palm. Her voice washed over him, cautious and weary yet resigned. “This is a bad idea, Ju. You will not get anything but pain from it.”

He opened his eyes slowly, squinting when moonlight fell onto his face. “I need to do this. Are you with me?”

He could feel her hesitancy rolling off her in waves before she sighed heavily. “You know I am you giant oaf. But when this backfires, I will not be able to pick up all the pieces.”

Jules tilted his head down to look at her, seeing her looking at him in resignation and defeat. He lifted her with the palm of his hand and took a deep breath. “I’ll pick them all up myself. We are a team. And I know you don’t agree with this but I _need_ this.”

She searched his eyes before she nodded, weary, and floated upwards. “Then, you know what to say.”

He smiled and stood to his feet before he slipped the bracelet off his wrist, tossing it into the air. He watched it hover in the moonlight, the gold rings glinting, before he whispered, “Barxx, Fetch.”

She gave him one last disapproving glance before she became a ball of golden light. Barxx launched herself into the bracelet and when he held up his wrist, the Dog Miraculous slipped over it without any hesitation or resistance like it had been made for him. As soon as the Miraculous was on his wrist, Barxx’s magick enveloped him firmly in a soft, golden light with white sparkles that darted off like lost fireflies. The magick of the Dog was sensitively soft and gentle with an undercurrent of strength. Barxx made him feel both weak and strong at the same time and she kept him balanced against the current of himself. 

Her power flooded him and as his suit moulded around him, he heard her voice tickling the back of his mind. _“This isn’t a good idea…..But I will be here for you. Use my power for my good, Jules. Make yourself proud, do the right thing…..And you’ll become the hero I know you are.”_

He swiped an arm across his misty eyes and sniffled, hearing the dog kwami’s amused sigh. He smiled and looked out over Paris, the moon high up in the sky. He placed both his hands on his waist and looked at the gray clouds passing through the navy sky, shielding the light of the stars. And he wondered if there were any Gods up there at all or if they had all come down here to become Miraculous. Cocking his head to the side, tail curling in curiosity, he gazed at the sky with eyes opened wide in wonder. 

So focused on examining the night, he never noticed the lithe cat lean against the side of the brick chimney behind him until his velvety soft voice permeated the quiet surrounding the city. “Master Fu told us to head home. Come on, Chiot, let’s go home and return these earrings to Marinette.”

The way he said her name was a reverence on his tongue, rolling off his tongue like a prayer. There was no doubt that Adrien adored Marinette and Jules felt excitement bubble in his gut. Master Fu had told him that Cat Noir and Ladybug were a bit of mystery. How they – Plagg and Tikki – had come into being was still unknown and the Gods themselves never spoke of it. Barxx herself was made from the feeling of Loyalty and Devotion. A dark, seething shadow sparked inside of him and Jules’ smile slowly faded.

“Don’t you want to find him?” He hadn’t meant to ask that but the question broke the quiet night, shattered the peace surrounding them. 

The intense, dark waves rolling off Cat’s tense body was enough for Jules to turn around and face him. He was met with the rippling of Cat Noir’s back as his clawed hands curled tight together and his shoulders hunched to his jaw. His ears flicked down to his head and his tail fell to the shingles of the Chinese healing shop with a cling. He watched the darkness descend and he froze as Cat Noir turned thin-slits to look back at him out the very corner of his eyes.

“I want to. I want to…..Do a lot of things.” He looked away and bent his head down. His hands trembled and a small dribble of blood fell to the shingles from the force of his claws piercing his suit. “But Marinette would never forgive me.”

Jules flinched, knowing the hero was right but the ache in his chest that he _should_ have saved her was gnawing at him. He shouldn’t have let her walk home alone! This was his fault and he wanted to make it right. “She doesn’t have to know. A secret between you and me. I just-I can’t….If I had just –“

Cat spun on him then, slitted green orbs blown wide but eyebrows slanted downwards in anger. He bared sharp, pointed fangs at Jules, the tip of his tail flicking back and forth behind him as he shouted, “And if Tikki hadn’t been so strong, we _both_ would have been too late. You don’t think this eats at me? Every time I look at her I see the scars that shouldn’t be there! But what do you think she needs more: vengeance or love? If you know Marinette at all, then what does she need from you? From me? From her parents?”

Jules felt the shame flood him as his body slumped inwards and he looked at the shingled roof. His eyes swam with angry, self-loathing tears. He sniffled and answered, voice rough with emotion. “ _I_ need to do this. I failed her. I need to find him and I need to make him answer for what he did. We’re heroes. So why when she needs us the most were we completely useless!?”

He hadn’t meant to shout but the tears in his eyes were falling to the roof, splashing against the black tiles, and he had hunched over from his shoulders. His blonde hair fell into his face as he glared with teary, blurry eyes and felt his own ears drop to his head. He didn’t hear Cat approach so much as he felt him. The dark magick that coursed through his blood sparked out as the Cat stepped his metal pawed boots right into Jules’ line of sight from his hunched over position. He stared at the metal paws and felt the shame in his gut roil up into his throat. He felt like the floor had opened up and swallowed him, his head hurt, and he felt like throwing up.

Cat’s quiet voice gave him a choice. “If you want your chance, you’ve got it. He’s here. Right over there.”

Jules spun around, eyes frantically wide as he followed Cat’s clawed finger. It was pointed out from the Chinese shop and only a few streets down. Cat’s eyes were narrowed onto the spot with a deadly precision as he asked, not even sparing Jules a glance, “Is vengeance more important than your loyalty to her and her feelings?”

It was a low blow, considering those were the things dogs stood for and specifically the Dog Miraculous. Jules clenched his hands into fists and glared down at where Cat’s finger had pointed, dark clouds blowing in over the moon’s light. He took a deep breath before he spoke. “No. But her safety is more important than my loyalty to her feelings.”

There was a thick, dark silence that hung over the heroes. A cold wind blew in with the storm clouds and the wind blew in the smell of rain. Thunder rumbled in the far off distance as the two shared a wordless glance out the corner of their eyes. Deep inside a Cat and a Dog, a bond was formed. As they leaped off the roof and toward the smell of filth, the slimy feeling of betrayal stabbed deep into their guts just as lightning flashed in the dark clouds above them. The Gods were angry and deep inside of Jules, Barxx simply closed her amber eyes and gave in to the weariness sinking into her bones. 

When they found him he was in an alley, leaning against the stone wall of a closed supermarket. He was wearing a hooded robe but the hood was down and for the first time, the two got a good look at him from high above from the orange light of the street lamp across from the alley. His face was bruised and Jules felt a thread of pride hum inside of him. Marinette may have been the one who was attacked but the bastard didn’t leave without injury. She had fought and it showed. His hair was a shaggy, thick black and he was smoking a cigarette, the tip burning as smoke filtered into the Dog’s sensitive nose. 

He wiggled it to get rid of the smell of nicotine and ash, the smell almost burning. He looked over at Cat with watery eyes to see how he was faring only to find that it wasn’t Cat that crouched beside him. This was a predator with every intention of stalking it’s prey until, at last, the cat struck it’s deadly claws. His glowing gaze was focused on the form below them, claws dug into the stone of the roof they were perched on. Small, thin slits gazed below, ears flat against his head and tail tucked down against the roof. The metal tip curled slowly inward then outward, dangerously, and Jules balked at how this was such a terrible idea.

But it was too late to go back. Jules turned his head back to the attacker and took a deep breath. When the boy let the cigarette fall to the ground, crushing it beneath a black boot, Jules leapt to the ground. He landed on his hands first before rising to his feet at the lip of the alley and blocking the boy in. Shaggy black hair fell over his face matching the blue and purple bruise that dotted his jaw and cheek. He was lean but Jules couldn’t miss the strength in his wide shoulders. Lifting a hand, Jules cracked his knuckles, fangs glinting in the darkness of the alley as his hushed growl filled the stormy night.

“We hear you hurt a friend of ours.” The loud cracking of his fingers echoed in the quiet of the alley and the boy stumbled back, freezing when he hit a wall of solid black. Jules’ smirk widened. “We’re not too happy about that, you see.”

Light mocha eyes kept a close watch as the boy slowly tilted his head back to stare up into luminescent green pools. He whimpered, his body trembling, and slowly Cat’s lips stretched upwards as his head tilted to the side. Two fangs glinted orange from the street lamp’s light. He leaned his head down until his nose touched the tip of the boy’s just as his quavering voice bounced around the brick alley. “I-I-I don’t k-know what you’re talking about!”

One second the kid was huddled against Cat’s rippling form of darkness and the next, Cat had him by throat against the brick of the convenience store. Black tipped claws dug into the soft skin of the boy’s neck as the dark predator hissed a warning. “Oh you know exactly what we’re talking about. Marinette. You attacked Marinette.”

Jules stepped forward, smirk gone, hands held up to ward off the angry slitted orbs that peeked out from the corners of his narrowed gaze. “Calm down.”

Cat snapped his head back to the boy who was trembling in the dark heroes single armed hold. The boy’s hands clawed at the hand dug into his throat and Cat leaned closer, smirk dark and dangerous. “Is this how she felt? Scared? Powerless?”

He stumbled forward when Cat struck out his free fist, the sound of his knuckles hitting the uninjured side of the boy’s face. The boy cried out and Cat’s grip tightened, eyes narrowing as he pulled him back and slammed him against the brick wall. “Hey, WolfsBane?”

It wasn’t Jules that stepped forward and up next to the angry teen but an innocently smiling WolfsBane as he leaned down into the boy’s face. “Yes, Cat Noir?”

The grin Cat sent him from the side had his heart thundering in his chest. “What do dogs and cats have in common?”

The boy was struggling in earnest now, clawing at Cat Noir’s suit but the spandex held tight. His legs thrashed and even Jules inwardly winced every time those boots hit Cat Noir’s body. Tears and snot leaked from his eyes and nose as he struggled to escape.

WolfsBane cocked his head to the side, looking at the boy’s wide, panicked eyes and felt a dark thrill of vengeance surge through him. “What?”

“They enjoy the hunt.”

As a small rainy drizzle began to fall from the dark sky as thunder rumbled over the city of Paris. Deep in the bowels of an alley, a dog and a cat stood over their unconscious prey, fanged smirks gleaming in the darkness of the alley. They lifted their arms in a high five, victorious. As it turned out, vengeance tasted like rain and darkness, like power and shame: bitterly sweet.

~ * ~

“Back off mutt, it’s mine!”

“Oh no you don’t you mangy feline. You aren’t taking off with the last blueberry muffin!”

Marinette watched in almost awe as Adrien and Jules bantered at the kitchen table the next morning. A chill of unease swept through her at the easy way the two held themselves together in close proximity. After yesterday, she was sure she would have had to pull them off one like another more times than not however…..Here they were, sitting around the table with Alya, herself, and Nino – her parents having vacated to the Bakery to tend to the morning customers – as if yesterday were only a dream. She glanced at Alya and Nino, begging one of them to see what she was seeing. Happily shovelling muffins into his face, Nino had no idea the absurdity of the scene in front of them but Alya’s honey gold orbs slowly looked over at her, her mouth slightly askew.

So Alya understood. The two shared wide eyed looks and parted lips before looking back at the spectacle the two boys made. Jules was obviously the taller one but Adrien was all lean muscle and the two were bickering like siblings. Holding the aforementioned muffin above his head, Jules grinned as Adrien clambered out of his chair towards the towering giant. It was…..Odd to see Adrien climbing Jules for a _muffin_ but deep inside of her, she felt a warm joy slide through her. 

Coughing, she gestured to the large platter of muffins in the middle of the table. “Uh, I think there’s plenty of everyone.”

She nearly jumped out of her skin when, simultaneously, both heads snapped to look at her. Alya gripped her knee beneath the table and she had to agree with the confused shock those looks brought forth. For a moment, it seemed like all either one of them could see was her. Nothing else. The moment broke when they looked at each other, grinned, and then shrugged. Jules brought the muffin down and took a large chomp as Adrien settled back in his seat, Nino finally looking up. 

Adrien laughed at all the crumbs littering Nino’s cheeks. “Dude, manners.”

Flushing, he swallowed and wiped his mouth on his sleeve – Alya was not happy: “Ew. You are not kissing me later. Forget it.” – before giving Adrien a thumbs up. “Thanks bro.”

Marinette had just opened her mouth when her mother’s voice hollered from the first floor. “You kids will be late soon!”

Alya sighed and pushed her chair back, rolling her eyes and muttering, “Another day of Chloe, great.”

Nino, shovelling muffins into his face and taking the tray with him, approached the living room TV. He kicked up a foot at the TV power button and watched the channel he had set it on – the news channel judging by the low murmur of Nadja’s voice – with the plate clutched tight in his hands. Alya grabbed Jules when she noticed Adrien approaching her, dragging him off towards the apartment door – “Why don’t we go, uh, over here!”

Adrien laid a gentle hand on her upper arm and electricity shot through her at the small touch, wide eyes shooting up to his. He opened his mouth and then closed it, looking away, and Marinette cocked her head. Her heart pounded in her chest as she reached up with a hand to cup his jaw. Tilting his face into her hand, he looked ready to say something when Nino’s choked sputtering reached their ears. At first, she was going to ignore him until he started frantically pointing at the TV while thumping his chest, eyes wide. 

Furrowing her eyebrows, a little annoyed, she sighed but gave Adrien an apologetic smile and headed next to their friend. Alya met her half way, linking their arms as they looked at the TV. Jules and Adrien leaned near the kitchen counter, seemingly not interested as Nino, still swallowing down the food, turned the volume up until it echoed in the bright kitchen. 

The serious tone of Nadja’s voice and her words made Marinette’s blood run cold. “Latest news, Nadja Chamack reporting. Just last night a student of College Dupont Francois, Julius Devrou, was left outside a police station. The boy had attempted an assault on a fellow student, name withheld, and was left at the police station with bruises, bleeding, minor breaks, and unconscious.”

The silence in the room was blindingly deafening and Marinette felt an icy chill tickle her spine. Nadja looked at the TV – at _her_ – just as a picture she had never thought she would see flashed onto the screen. Those eyes were the same as that night and she gripped Alya’s arm tightly, fingers digging in until her knuckles turned white. Her knees trembled but she was focused only on that face and the knowledge he was caught. He couldn’t hurt her. Alya took a minute to look between her and the picture before she mumbled, “They caught him, M.”

But the next words halted everything in their wake. “An Officer had noticed the boy tied in black leather, unconscious and injured, with a note attached. The police force have allowed us to share the note with you, the public.”

An image of the note, small and square, flashed onto the TV. The words were simple enough: _This criminal is wanted for assault. Please take him into custody._ Right below the simple message was something that rolled around her mind like an escaped marble: off to the left and the right, two separate paw prints were slammed onto the paper. One had claws and one didn’t. An icy numbness spread through her as her mind processed what she was seeing. 

Nadja’s voice carried on. “The police checked Julius’ home and found a multitude of photographs and collection of very,” Nadja’s voice hesitated as she coughed. “Horrible depictions of violence toward the student he attacked. He is in custody and awaiting trial. To this, we owe our thanks to the heroes who brought him to justice. Looks like Cat Noir, Rena Rouge, and Ladybug all have new heroes to help them! This is Nadja Chamack! Don’t be bemused, it’s just the news!”

Marinette’s heart spiralled up into her throat as she raised her hands to her mouth, brows twisted as tears blurred her vision. Clutching her arm tight, Alya grinned up at her and raised a finger to swipe at the tears beneath her eyes. A shaky, wobbly smile stretched her lips and for the first time, the dark tangled mess of her heart released. She was _safe_. A breathy laugh flew out of her lips as Nino grinned wide and laid a firm hand on her shoulder, squeezing tight. She lifted a trembling hand and squeezed back. And then suddenly she was crying big fat, hot tears, sobbing in the kitchen with the morning light falling through the rain-soaked windows.

As all storms do, the breeze from outside was no longer the cold chill of Spring but carried the scent of flowers and rain. The sun streamed down, bright and chasing away the shadows. The wind that whistled through the curtains was warm and suddenly, Marinette could finally breathe again. Alya threw her arms around Nino and the two hugged tight, Nino doing everything he could to balance the ecstatic, babbling Alya. 

“I am so gonna put this on my blog and thank those heroes!! Like, right now!”

Shoving her hand in her pocket and bouncing on her feet, Alya pulled out her phone just as Marinette reached for her best friend to talk her down about how that was definitely not necessary – when her stomach plummeted to the floor. You know that moment where you know something but you can’t place it? You see it and know it’s odd, know it’s wrong, but you don’t place it until much later – usually when it’s much too _late_? 

Mind whirring, Marinette thought back to the image of the note. Like a magnifying glass, her mind focused only on the two splotchy ink prints of a clawed paw and a claw-less paw at the bottom of the note. Brows slanting downwards, she hesitated. Taking a deep breath and ignoring the hard ball in her throat, she turned. Adrien and Jules were still leaning against the kitchen counter but both their eyes were closed. Heads tilted slightly and small smirks playing at the corners of their lips, her heart stuttered. 

When each of their arms lifted she felt her blood rush through her so quick she felt faint, all the noise of the room fading to a dull, throbbing buzz. They high fived and everything clicked. A cat and dog paw print. Cat Noir and…..Dog Miraculous. Cat was Adrien. And Dog was…..?

Her body dropped in shock, shoulders slumping and eyes going wide at the implications of her discovery. The boys turned, unaware of her eyes on them as they chatted to themselves in low, quiet tones at the kitchen counter. It all made so much more sense. Their bantering camaraderie, the boy who had assaulted her being caught and beaten, _Jules_. Everything fell into shattered pieces around her, falling into place, and she felt a genuine smile cross her lips. Sure, she still felt fear in the back of her mind and her two best friends – and hopeful boyfriend – had just betrayed a major part of her trust by going behind her back…..

But they had done it for _her_. Approaching them quietly, she linked each of her arms with one of their own, pulling them both close to her side as she squeezed her eyes shut. The smell of rain brushed through her nose and there were no more doubts. 

There were only two words she had the strength to say and they didn’t do anything near the justice the two boys she held deserved: “Thank you.”

But it was a start. Now, she could heal.


End file.
